Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Black Parade
CHAPTER 3- Chloe
So i'm REALLY sorry this took so long. I got writers block O.o P.S, it kind of helps if you listen to Cancer while reading this :)
Non-Frank’s POV
Practically running to my chamber, I burst in and jumped onto the bed, hiding my face in the black silk and crying.
Why?! Why in god’s name was this happening to me?!
Wasn’t it enough that I was trapped here, forced to “live” an afterlife full of the misery of others? Why was the one thing I loved, the one thing that kept me sane, taken away from me?! Every time, they took Gerard away from me. But this……..this was so much worse than before. Bringing another Gerard here, before his time.
That was a point. Why was he even here? The members of The Black Parade had been promised to be replaced together, so we could leave here as one. What were they playing at, taking away Gerard before the rest of us? And replacing him with another?! I didn’t even know what happened to us when we were “replaced”. Maybe I didn’t want to know. Oh well. I’d find out soon enough.
I took a deep breath, trying to compose myself. It was not proper for a custodian of the The Black Parade to act in such a manor. Mama would not have approved. Despite of current affairs, I was still a professional.
But I couldn’t stop my mind from falling back to the first time we’d all died.
I………I couldn’t remember anymore.
I didn’t know whether it was the stress of the new Gerard, The longing for the old one, or whether I’d spent so many countless hundreds of years in the Parade that my memory was fading, but either way, I just couldn’t remember.
I blinked, as flashbacks raced through my mind.
Armour. Swordfights. Blood. LOADS of blood. I remembered the blood, the action, the pain and glory of the kill. Nothing else. Must have been a warrior of some sorts. The only things I could think of from real life were my friends, and how I’d had to run away from my hometown with Gerard for being gay. They were going to kill us for it before, they thought we were demons.
Ah. NOW I remembered how we died.
Gerard and I had run to the mountains, to escape the law. Our friends, although angry at our “wrongness” had stuck by us by walking us out of the city. Sadly, the town guard had caught up and killed us all. We’d fought, and taken down a good deal of men. But it was us five against dozens. We never had a chance.
Although I recalled all of this, I still couldn’t remember any other parts of my life. What era it was, where it was, my family, previous lovers, job occupation. Nothing. I’d lost count of how many years I’d been down here. After a while, they all just seemed to blend into one.
I heard a light tap on the door, and my stomach tightened. Couldn’t let the others see me like this. I composed myself and sat up.
It was Michael. He opened the door and walked in, a frown on his face.
“Michael? What’s wrong?” I inquired. He sighed. “The new Gerard just ran away. I tried to stop him, but he ignored me.”
Fantastic. Just what we needed right now.
Michael looked at me in a strange manor, as if he was trying to decode my thoughts. “Should we send out a search party for him?” He said.
“No. It shall be productive for him to see that this world is dead, and he’s inside it. And if he strays too far, I’m sure the House Of Wolves will pick him up.”
Michael simply nodded, closing the door and leaving me alone.
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Gerard’s POV
I wouldn’t classify myself as a cowardly man. I wasn’t the bravest out there, but I’d been through a lot and it had made me a fairly strong person. This place though…… it took away all of my confidence. I was practically a little kid.
Running.
It had just all been too much to take in. The way they all acted like this was normal, like nothing horribly wrong was happening. It unsettled me so much I felt like I was going to explode. I was scared. Really scared. This place, this nightmare…..It was on a whole other level to anything I’d ever dealt with before. It was so alien, so terrifying. It really was like I was trapped in a horrible nightmare.
I ran, trying my best to avoid the dead who gazed up at me, looking just as cold and anxious and scared as I was. Confused tears streamed down my face as I ran. I wanted to go home! I wanted to see LynZ’s beautiful smile, and feel Frank’s arms wrap around me in a gentle embrace….. I wanted to watch Mikey and Bob argue over which COD was the best, I wanted to be in awe of Ray’s amazingly inspiring talent. Most of all, I just wanted to be alive.
I left the main path, and stumbled over what seemed to be a mountain of rubble and ash. The blackened, colourless landscape made me cry even more, but I fought through the tears and carried on.
It was beautiful, I had to admit. In a completely terrifying way. Ash constantly fell, like the skies themselves were burning. I trembled slightly. Everything was just so…………White and black. For about the hundredth time, I wondered how such a chilling, yet beautiful place could possibly exist. Maybe it didn’t. I was still half convinced I was in a coma or something, but it didn’t explain some things.
Like how the cold breeze brushed against my face, Or how soft the ash felt as I rubbed it between my fingers. How the deadly quiet seemed to leave me feeling so empty, so alone. I rubbed my weary eyes, beginning to feel tired and a little breathless.
I eventually found an old blackened armchair, holes worn into the leather sides. I collapsed onto it, glad to have somewhere to rest. How could I get tired if I was meant to be dead? This was so confusing. My eyelids began to get heavy, and before I knew it, I was drifting into a restless sleep.
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Frank’s POV
“I can’t do this,” I croaked. Everyone else in the room held a similar appearance to myself. Bloodshot eyes and miserable faces.
“You have to. We have to. It’s……It’s what he would have wanted. He would have wanted us to carry on,” Mikey chocked out. I looked over at him sympathetically, feeling instantly guilty. I had no right to sit and be miserable over Gerard. Mikey did. I couldn’t imagine how horrible it would be to lose a brother like that, especially one that Mikey had idolised so much. They were practically inseparable, best friends and brothers at the same time.
“I miss him so much,” Bob whispered. Gerard had always taken extra time to be nice to Bob, check he was ok. For some reason, the fans didn’t seem to worship Bob as much as they did everyone else in the band, but Gerard was always there to boost his confidence when he got upset about it. Thinking back, Gee was actually super nice to everyone. He would do these kind little gestures all the time. It would be the most simple thing, like mentioning that your hair looked good today, or telling you how awesome you were when you played particularly well, but it would turn the crappest day ever into a pretty damn good one. I wiped a stray tear from my eye.
“Right, you guys are on.”
We all turned our attention to the crew manager, as he looked at us sympathetically. I simply nodded at him, and took a deep breath.
“We can mourn later. Right now we have a duty to the fans, and a duty to Gerard.”
I was surprised to hear Ray say anything. He had been almost completely silent since it had happened, and only ever replied with shrugs or nods.
“For Gerard,” Bob said.
“For Gerard,” We all echoed.
We all walked from the backstage curtain to the press conference seats and microphones. Looking out at the sea of worried fans, my heart almost broke. They only knew that Gee was ill, they didn’t know he was gone. Clearing my throat, I pulled a crumpled, tearstained piece of paper from my pocket and began to read.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I just want to start by saying how much it means to My Chem for you guys to all come out on such short notice. We’re so grateful to be loved by you all, and we love you back.” I looked at Mikey, and he nodded, urging me to continue.
“You’ve probably heard many rumours concerning our band mate, and best friend, Gerard Way. This is going to come as a shock to everyone I’m sure, but we won’t just sit here and lie to you, that I can promise.”
I sat up slightly and cleared my throat, because I could feel my voice trembling.
“Yesterday evening, Gerard committed suicide.”
Practically the whole audience gasped, and I could see tears welling in their eyes already.
“We are deeply saddened by his loss, not only as a friend, but as an inspiration to us all. We can only hope you send him your prayers and best wishes, and join us in celebrating the memory of an amazing man.”
Practically everyone was sobbing, and it broke my heart to see. My Chem was what saved a lot of these kids lives, and we were like heroes to them.
“I know that this will be just as hard for you as it is for us, but hopefully we’ll be able to pull through together. I have a few words here, taken from the letter Gee left for us all.”
I stood up, and the whole crowd became silent.
“Dear Friends, Family, And fans. I know you’re upset and disappointed in me right now. I can not begin to express how sorry I am for leaving my loved ones behind, but life just wasn’t worth living anymore. I couldn’t live a single day without some sort of alcohol, without some sort of substance abuse. They helped me to stop feeling, but when I stopped feeling, what did I have to live for? It was my own fault, I could just never be happy, no matter how hard I struggled and tried. But not for one minute, do you EVER think this is you’re fault. You made me who I am today, you gave me the strength to carry on for as long as I did, and I love you all so much. Especially the fans. You guys gave me purpose, and it made me so happy to know that My Chemical Romance’s music helped you guys cope with life. You were so much stronger than I was, and you made life worth living. I love every single one of you.
I really hope you all have a great life. Don’t let my death bring you down.
Love, Gerard.”
There was not a single dry eye in the house. Everyone, from security to myself, were pretty much bawling their eyes out.
Mikey, Ray, and Bob took it in turns to speak to the crowd, tell them just how much Gee meant to them. Possibly the worst of all, was watching LynZ come on stage and then break into hysterics, having to leave halfway through. I noticed she’d dyed her hair back to black again. She’d run straight into the arms of a sad looking Jimmy Urine, who like the rest of Mindless Self indulgence, had come to pay his respects.
“P-please join us in a very s-special version of c-cancer. We d-don’t have a singer anymore, s-so I want to see a-all of y-you singing the word’s for Gee,” I chocked out.
Our pianist started playing a lower, slower, more beautiful version of Cancer.
I waited for the intro to time out, and then in mouthed the word “go” at the audience. On queue, the crowd began to sing. They were one uniformed body, one voice, and I saw them all reaching for each others hands to sing the most emotional version of Cancer I had ever heard.
"Turn away…..If you could get me a drink, Of water cause my lips are chapped and faded;
Call my Aunt Marie…..Help her gather all my things,And bury me
In all my favourite colours, My sisters and my brothers still,
I will not kiss you!
Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you.”
Every single person there shared the same feeling of loss, of emptiness. The crowd had not only all joined hands, but were holding them up in the air, as if to say “This one’s for you, Gee. We’ll never forget you”.
”Now turn away, Cause I'm awful just to see.
Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body,
All my agony,
Know that I will never marry, Baby I'm just soggy from the chemo,
But counting down the days to go.
It just ain't living!
And I just hope you know…”
Several lighters were in the few hands that weren’t entwined with fellow crowd members, and they were being waved in the air like beacons of remembrance.
"That if you say
Good-bye today,
I'd ask you to be true !
Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you...”
I picked up my microphone and sang the last part with my grief stricken brothers and sisters.
“Cause the hardest part of this Is leaving you…….”
It was impossible to forget. That smile, that energy, those eyes…..
“To Gerard Way. May he never be forgotten.”
Yeah, it was pretty crappy. Review anyway!
So i'm REALLY sorry this took so long. I got writers block O.o P.S, it kind of helps if you listen to Cancer while reading this :)
Non-Frank’s POV
Practically running to my chamber, I burst in and jumped onto the bed, hiding my face in the black silk and crying.
Why?! Why in god’s name was this happening to me?!
Wasn’t it enough that I was trapped here, forced to “live” an afterlife full of the misery of others? Why was the one thing I loved, the one thing that kept me sane, taken away from me?! Every time, they took Gerard away from me. But this……..this was so much worse than before. Bringing another Gerard here, before his time.
That was a point. Why was he even here? The members of The Black Parade had been promised to be replaced together, so we could leave here as one. What were they playing at, taking away Gerard before the rest of us? And replacing him with another?! I didn’t even know what happened to us when we were “replaced”. Maybe I didn’t want to know. Oh well. I’d find out soon enough.
I took a deep breath, trying to compose myself. It was not proper for a custodian of the The Black Parade to act in such a manor. Mama would not have approved. Despite of current affairs, I was still a professional.
But I couldn’t stop my mind from falling back to the first time we’d all died.
I………I couldn’t remember anymore.
I didn’t know whether it was the stress of the new Gerard, The longing for the old one, or whether I’d spent so many countless hundreds of years in the Parade that my memory was fading, but either way, I just couldn’t remember.
I blinked, as flashbacks raced through my mind.
Armour. Swordfights. Blood. LOADS of blood. I remembered the blood, the action, the pain and glory of the kill. Nothing else. Must have been a warrior of some sorts. The only things I could think of from real life were my friends, and how I’d had to run away from my hometown with Gerard for being gay. They were going to kill us for it before, they thought we were demons.
Ah. NOW I remembered how we died.
Gerard and I had run to the mountains, to escape the law. Our friends, although angry at our “wrongness” had stuck by us by walking us out of the city. Sadly, the town guard had caught up and killed us all. We’d fought, and taken down a good deal of men. But it was us five against dozens. We never had a chance.
Although I recalled all of this, I still couldn’t remember any other parts of my life. What era it was, where it was, my family, previous lovers, job occupation. Nothing. I’d lost count of how many years I’d been down here. After a while, they all just seemed to blend into one.
I heard a light tap on the door, and my stomach tightened. Couldn’t let the others see me like this. I composed myself and sat up.
It was Michael. He opened the door and walked in, a frown on his face.
“Michael? What’s wrong?” I inquired. He sighed. “The new Gerard just ran away. I tried to stop him, but he ignored me.”
Fantastic. Just what we needed right now.
Michael looked at me in a strange manor, as if he was trying to decode my thoughts. “Should we send out a search party for him?” He said.
“No. It shall be productive for him to see that this world is dead, and he’s inside it. And if he strays too far, I’m sure the House Of Wolves will pick him up.”
Michael simply nodded, closing the door and leaving me alone.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gerard’s POV
I wouldn’t classify myself as a cowardly man. I wasn’t the bravest out there, but I’d been through a lot and it had made me a fairly strong person. This place though…… it took away all of my confidence. I was practically a little kid.
Running.
It had just all been too much to take in. The way they all acted like this was normal, like nothing horribly wrong was happening. It unsettled me so much I felt like I was going to explode. I was scared. Really scared. This place, this nightmare…..It was on a whole other level to anything I’d ever dealt with before. It was so alien, so terrifying. It really was like I was trapped in a horrible nightmare.
I ran, trying my best to avoid the dead who gazed up at me, looking just as cold and anxious and scared as I was. Confused tears streamed down my face as I ran. I wanted to go home! I wanted to see LynZ’s beautiful smile, and feel Frank’s arms wrap around me in a gentle embrace….. I wanted to watch Mikey and Bob argue over which COD was the best, I wanted to be in awe of Ray’s amazingly inspiring talent. Most of all, I just wanted to be alive.
I left the main path, and stumbled over what seemed to be a mountain of rubble and ash. The blackened, colourless landscape made me cry even more, but I fought through the tears and carried on.
It was beautiful, I had to admit. In a completely terrifying way. Ash constantly fell, like the skies themselves were burning. I trembled slightly. Everything was just so…………White and black. For about the hundredth time, I wondered how such a chilling, yet beautiful place could possibly exist. Maybe it didn’t. I was still half convinced I was in a coma or something, but it didn’t explain some things.
Like how the cold breeze brushed against my face, Or how soft the ash felt as I rubbed it between my fingers. How the deadly quiet seemed to leave me feeling so empty, so alone. I rubbed my weary eyes, beginning to feel tired and a little breathless.
I eventually found an old blackened armchair, holes worn into the leather sides. I collapsed onto it, glad to have somewhere to rest. How could I get tired if I was meant to be dead? This was so confusing. My eyelids began to get heavy, and before I knew it, I was drifting into a restless sleep.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Frank’s POV
“I can’t do this,” I croaked. Everyone else in the room held a similar appearance to myself. Bloodshot eyes and miserable faces.
“You have to. We have to. It’s……It’s what he would have wanted. He would have wanted us to carry on,” Mikey chocked out. I looked over at him sympathetically, feeling instantly guilty. I had no right to sit and be miserable over Gerard. Mikey did. I couldn’t imagine how horrible it would be to lose a brother like that, especially one that Mikey had idolised so much. They were practically inseparable, best friends and brothers at the same time.
“I miss him so much,” Bob whispered. Gerard had always taken extra time to be nice to Bob, check he was ok. For some reason, the fans didn’t seem to worship Bob as much as they did everyone else in the band, but Gerard was always there to boost his confidence when he got upset about it. Thinking back, Gee was actually super nice to everyone. He would do these kind little gestures all the time. It would be the most simple thing, like mentioning that your hair looked good today, or telling you how awesome you were when you played particularly well, but it would turn the crappest day ever into a pretty damn good one. I wiped a stray tear from my eye.
“Right, you guys are on.”
We all turned our attention to the crew manager, as he looked at us sympathetically. I simply nodded at him, and took a deep breath.
“We can mourn later. Right now we have a duty to the fans, and a duty to Gerard.”
I was surprised to hear Ray say anything. He had been almost completely silent since it had happened, and only ever replied with shrugs or nods.
“For Gerard,” Bob said.
“For Gerard,” We all echoed.
We all walked from the backstage curtain to the press conference seats and microphones. Looking out at the sea of worried fans, my heart almost broke. They only knew that Gee was ill, they didn’t know he was gone. Clearing my throat, I pulled a crumpled, tearstained piece of paper from my pocket and began to read.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I just want to start by saying how much it means to My Chem for you guys to all come out on such short notice. We’re so grateful to be loved by you all, and we love you back.” I looked at Mikey, and he nodded, urging me to continue.
“You’ve probably heard many rumours concerning our band mate, and best friend, Gerard Way. This is going to come as a shock to everyone I’m sure, but we won’t just sit here and lie to you, that I can promise.”
I sat up slightly and cleared my throat, because I could feel my voice trembling.
“Yesterday evening, Gerard committed suicide.”
Practically the whole audience gasped, and I could see tears welling in their eyes already.
“We are deeply saddened by his loss, not only as a friend, but as an inspiration to us all. We can only hope you send him your prayers and best wishes, and join us in celebrating the memory of an amazing man.”
Practically everyone was sobbing, and it broke my heart to see. My Chem was what saved a lot of these kids lives, and we were like heroes to them.
“I know that this will be just as hard for you as it is for us, but hopefully we’ll be able to pull through together. I have a few words here, taken from the letter Gee left for us all.”
I stood up, and the whole crowd became silent.
“Dear Friends, Family, And fans. I know you’re upset and disappointed in me right now. I can not begin to express how sorry I am for leaving my loved ones behind, but life just wasn’t worth living anymore. I couldn’t live a single day without some sort of alcohol, without some sort of substance abuse. They helped me to stop feeling, but when I stopped feeling, what did I have to live for? It was my own fault, I could just never be happy, no matter how hard I struggled and tried. But not for one minute, do you EVER think this is you’re fault. You made me who I am today, you gave me the strength to carry on for as long as I did, and I love you all so much. Especially the fans. You guys gave me purpose, and it made me so happy to know that My Chemical Romance’s music helped you guys cope with life. You were so much stronger than I was, and you made life worth living. I love every single one of you.
I really hope you all have a great life. Don’t let my death bring you down.
Love, Gerard.”
There was not a single dry eye in the house. Everyone, from security to myself, were pretty much bawling their eyes out.
Mikey, Ray, and Bob took it in turns to speak to the crowd, tell them just how much Gee meant to them. Possibly the worst of all, was watching LynZ come on stage and then break into hysterics, having to leave halfway through. I noticed she’d dyed her hair back to black again. She’d run straight into the arms of a sad looking Jimmy Urine, who like the rest of Mindless Self indulgence, had come to pay his respects.
“P-please join us in a very s-special version of c-cancer. We d-don’t have a singer anymore, s-so I want to see a-all of y-you singing the word’s for Gee,” I chocked out.
Our pianist started playing a lower, slower, more beautiful version of Cancer.
I waited for the intro to time out, and then in mouthed the word “go” at the audience. On queue, the crowd began to sing. They were one uniformed body, one voice, and I saw them all reaching for each others hands to sing the most emotional version of Cancer I had ever heard.
"Turn away…..If you could get me a drink, Of water cause my lips are chapped and faded;
Call my Aunt Marie…..Help her gather all my things,And bury me
In all my favourite colours, My sisters and my brothers still,
I will not kiss you!
Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you.”
Every single person there shared the same feeling of loss, of emptiness. The crowd had not only all joined hands, but were holding them up in the air, as if to say “This one’s for you, Gee. We’ll never forget you”.
”Now turn away, Cause I'm awful just to see.
Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body,
All my agony,
Know that I will never marry, Baby I'm just soggy from the chemo,
But counting down the days to go.
It just ain't living!
And I just hope you know…”
Several lighters were in the few hands that weren’t entwined with fellow crowd members, and they were being waved in the air like beacons of remembrance.
"That if you say
Good-bye today,
I'd ask you to be true !
Cause the hardest part of this,
Is leaving you...”
I picked up my microphone and sang the last part with my grief stricken brothers and sisters.
“Cause the hardest part of this Is leaving you…….”
It was impossible to forget. That smile, that energy, those eyes…..
“To Gerard Way. May he never be forgotten.”
Yeah, it was pretty crappy. Review anyway!
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