FicWad

GERARD'S P.O.V.

I sat at the kitchen table while my mother was busy making pizza, we were waiting for my brother Mikey to come home from college for the Summer- it had been his first year and he was bringing a friend back with him, Frank. I hoped that Mikey had been having a better time at college than he had at high school- in high school, we always hung out together, with Ray and Bob. They were the only three friends that I had, and they were all brothers to me. Mikey had some other lose friends around school but I had no one- I was passionately hated by pretty much everybody, and it hurt more when Mikey was beat up and ridiculed as well. It hurt because he was beat up for being brothers with me.
I sighed and picked at the material of my skinny jeans. I was wearing the usual for when I meet new people- I don’t want to freak them out and being accepted for once would be nice. I had black skinny jeans, a baggy T-shirt and an even baggier hoodie to attempt to hide my curves. That’s my big secret. I’ve never considered myself as anything other than one hundred per cent guy. I was born a guy, or so we thought… When I was eleven I got the shock of my life- I started menstruating. I was terrified, to say the least. I was a boy! I wasn’t meant to do that! I told my Mom and we went to the doctors and a few tests were run. That was the day that someone first called me a hermaphrodite and, hell, I hate that word. But it’s who I am and I can’t change that. At first it was alright, I didn’t really have to worry- no one needed to know, but when I was twelve, a nasty thing started called breast development, and my life went drastically downhill from there. If it wasn’t bad enough already being fat, ugly and a ‘goth’ I was now a hermaphrodite as well, and everybody knew. By the time I was sixteen you had to be blind if you hadn’t noticed, I had unfortunately inherited the breasts from my mother’s side of the family- e.g. big and bouncy. I always wore a sports bra, to try and flatten them and dressed in baggy clothes when interacting with people- new people especially. I’m twenty now, I still live at home with my mother and to top everything off, I’m gay as well. I realised this when I was fourteen and told my brother Mikey, who is three years younger than me. He, Bob and Ray were accepting and I just hoped Frank was too. From the little I have heard of him, he sounds like a pretty awesome guy, and I hope we can be friends.
“Mom, Gerard? We’re here!” Mikey called and I jumped out of my chair and ran down the hall, crashing straight into my baby brothers arms and knocking him back a few steps.
“I’ve missed you so much Mikes! How are you?” I asked as he pulled away from my tight grip.
“I’ve missed you too Gee.” He smiled, using my old nickname. “I’m great! How are you?”
“Good as can be expected.” I smiled and his grin matched mine.
“Oh! This is Frank!” He pointed to the boy standing next to him. He was short- around five foot four, looked muscular, had a lip ring threaded through his pale pink lips. His skin was olive and tattooed, he had a black mow hawk which lay flat on his head, the fringe curled slightly at the end and covering his left eye- his eyes were rimmed with red liner and emerald green.
“Hi, I’m Gerard. It’s nice to meet you.” I said and held out my hand for him to shake. He didn’t take it and just stood, staring at my chest. I dropped my hand and laughed nervously, before bolting back into the kitchen and sitting down. Muttered apologies and footsteps could be heard coming down the hall into the kitchen as my Mom served up, vegetarian pizza, Mikey’s favourite.
“ Hello, you must be Frank. I’m Mikey’s mom, call me Donna.” Mom said and Frank smiled, hugging her and saying hello. I looked down, letting my just-longer-than-chin-length raven black hair fall in front of my face like a protective curtain. I saw Mikey give Frank a small nudge in the back and Frank hesitantly sat down next to me.
“H-hey. Sorry about earlier, it’s just, well…” Frank stuttered and I shook my head.
“It’s okay, I get it.” I said and stood up. “I’m not hungry, see ya later Mikes, night Mom, night Frank.” I said quietly and slouched off to my basement bedroom and into my bathroom. I looked in the mirror and snarled.
“Useless.” I mutter as I look at my reflection. My eyes were bright green with heavy purple circles underneath them- thank you, insomnia. My skin was a ghostly pallor for reasons unknown, my lips small, pouted, chapped and also pale. My hair was messy and fell around my face looking pretty useless.
“Ugly, useless, worthless fag.” I snarled as I stripped of my shirt. “Fat, untalented, idiotic freak.” I snarled as I let my skinny jeans fall to the floor.
“You’re not.” A quiet voice said behind me. Frank. I jumped and yanked on the long black shirt I usually slept in.
“I am.” I said and pushed past him to curl up under the covers in my bed.
“You’re really not.” He said, sitting down on the side of the bed. I turned over so I wasn’t facing him- hoping he would just go away.
“Then why the hell were you staring at me like I’m some sort of circus act?” I snarled, it being my ‘time of the month’ didn’t help my mood either.
“I wasn’t it’s just, well….” He left off again.
“Just what?” I growled.
“You have a really nice body, lots of girls pay good money for a figure like yours. You really are amazing, so why do you hide it?” He almost whispered and I felt a few tears escape from under my eyelids.
“Because I’m a freak. Please leave.” I whispered and he placed a hand on my shoulder, like he was going to say something else, but he didn’t and he left. I cried myself asleep again- I hadn’t done this for a good while, but I couldn’t help it. I cry a lot, it’s just what I do- I have clinical depression as well as both male and female hormones, which really doesn’t help my situation.
~
The sound of my door creaking open and someone padding down the stairs woke me up- the steps were too light to be Mom, so it has to be Mikey.
“Mikey? Bad dream? C’mere.” I said and flipped back the covers.
“Actually, it’s me.” Frank said nervously. “Mikey is fast asleep and I didn’t want to disturb Donna, I had a really bad dream. I get them a lot and Mikey normally lets me sleep with him, but he’s locked his bedroom door and I said I’d sleep on the couch.” He hung his head and I stayed silent. “I’m sorry, I should just-“
“No, Frank. Come here.” I said and he looked up.
“You sure?” He asked uncertainly, taking a few steps towards my metal framed bed.
“Yeah. I don’t mind. Mikey used to get nightmare’s all the time, still does occasionally.” I said and opened my arms for him. He crossed over to me and snuggled into my touch, pulling the covers back over us. “Sorry if this feels weird.” I said but he just snuggled closer, resting a head on my now unsupported and left-to-expand-freely chest and wrapped his arms around my waist.
“Why would it feel weird? Because you’re Mikey’s brother?” He asked, like it wasn’t obvious.
“No, because I’m a, God I hate this word, because I’m a hermaphrodite.” I sighed and I felt him shake his head.
“That doesn’t matter, Gee.” He paused. “Do you mind if I call you Gee? It just suits you a bit better than Gerard.” He asked.
“Sure, as long as I can call you Frankie we have a deal. It’s just because there was a guy in high school that used to beat me up called Frank.” I sighed, remembering all the harsh words he’d thrown at me and all the lockers he’d thrown me in.


PLEASE R&R...If you've read something like it before, I know, this was inspired by another story but as it progresses it is definately not the same. So R&R and I'll repost soon xP
XXX