Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Cinderfella

Cinderfella

by thegayestgoth 4 reviews

Frank's arrogant sexist jokes lands the boys in a little black mess.

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Angst,Drama,Humor - Characters: Bob Bryar,Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way,Ray Toro - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2011-04-26 - Updated: 2011-04-26 - 2441 words

4Original
UPDATE TUESDAY, APRIL 24, 2011:

FOLKS. Need I remind you all to RATE and REVIEW? I cannot stress this enough. I'm aware there's folks reading this story, but without ratings and reviews, it's new fun. Rate and review every chapter. I word very hard on these stories for your sick little pleasue, and that is all I ask for in return. Please. It means the world to me. Thank you so much.

~mr. gayestgoth






The booing grew louder. Way louder.

Frank laughed into the microphone as the booing grew to jeers. “And that’s why she had two black eyes,” he said. “She’d already been told twice.”

The jeers shifted to screams of outrage.

Big Wormy and Ray stood in the left wing, their mouths hanging open in complete and utter shock. Gerard, making a similar face, stood stage right. He dropped his bottle of water, causing it to splash onto the stage floor. No one noticed.
Even the light technicians’ expressions of disbelief could be seen through the dim blue light at the back of the auditorium.

Frank prattled on. “How do make a dishwasher into a snow blower?”

“FRANKIE! NO!!!” Mikey shouted. He bolted at Frank, lunging for the microphone.

Frank nonchalantly sidestepped. Mikey sailed a moment, then crashed to the floor. Frank looked at Mikey, and then proceeded to the punch line:

“Give the bitch a shovel.”

Deathly silence.

Bob froze behind his drums. Shutting his eyes, he held his breath, bracing himself for what was coming next…

****


“Midnight Star?! Midnight Star?! Who the hell brings Midnight Star to an MCR concert?!” Frank yelled as the boys sat on the back of the loading ramp, each awaiting his turn to be hosed off. “These kids don’t even know about Midnight Star!!! Seriously! Who brings a Midnight Star eight-track to a fucking MCR show?!”

“Why don’t you ask the fan who threw it at you?” Ray snapped. “Ouch! Turn the water pressure down,” he shouted.

“Sorry,” someone shouted.

“Ex-fan, you mean,” Gerard said. He raked a chunk of hot dog out his hair then proceeded to dip it into a glob of mustard on his brother’s shoulder. “I can’t believe you did that, Frank,” Gerard swallowed the hot dog and shook his head. “After all that stuff we said about respecting women. Just…wow.”

Frank rolled his eyes. “What fucking ever.” He waved his hand. “They’re just dumb kids. And they should learn how to laugh.”

Gerard looked like he wanted to slap Frank across the parking lot.

“Those ‘dumb kids’ got us where we are today!” Gee yelled.

“Or where we were,” Bob corrected.

Everyone glowered at Bob.

“Don’t get mad at me,” Bob defended himself. “Take that up with Captain Lesbian over there.” He stood and kicked water balloon pieces from his boots. “I’m going to bed,” he huffed before stalking off to the bus.

“I have a feeling we’re going to be paying for this in more ways than expected,” Mikey said.








Frank screamed.

“It finally hit you that our career is over,” Gerard said from under the covers. “I—” he began screaming.

Mikey kicked at Gerard’s bunk, which was above his. “Shut the hell up,” Mikey demanded, all grouchy-like. He rolled over and closed his eyes. “Now I can’t go back to sleep,” Mikey said from under his covers. “Thanks a lot, big brother.”

He kicked off his covers and sat up on the edge of the bunk. Three seconds later, Mikey started screaming.

Outside, Brian was returning from Starbucks with the boys’ morning coffee. Hearing the screaming, he ran to the bus and yanked the door open.

There were magazines everywhere. A kettle, unattended, was whistling in abandon. Water was running in the bathroom sink, which was now overflowing and flooding the back of the bus. Mikey was sitting on his bunk, shaking his head in disbelief saying, “No way. No way, “over and over. Gerard was holding his knees, rocking back and forth in one of the flooded corners but didn’t appear to notice the water. Frank was on his pacing on his knees, wringing his hands. Bob and Ray stood in the middle of the living room area, clutching and grabbing at each other, wailing. Toilet paper was strewn about the entire bus.

“What happened?” Brian asked calmly, setting down the coffee.

“We’re GIRLS!!!!!” everyone wailed.
http://i54.tinypic.com/20rld8k.jpg

Brian smiled gently. “Is that all?” he cooed. Brain opened his arms. “Come here.”

Like lost little kittens, they scampered to the safety of their beloved Brian’s arms. He wrapped his arms around all of them, rocking them gently and shushing them.
“My poor little lambs,” Brian said. “You’ve been through so much.” He laid his head on Ray’s shoulder. “You’ve been through so much.”



******


Cameras flashed.

“…will be taking an unexpected break from the tour. This includes interviews, television appearances, autograph signings and public appearances, and any other previously scheduled promotional gigs. We want the fans and the soldiers of the MCRmy to know My Chemical Romance is still there for you, but right now, there’s been an incredibly heavy change amongst the members. This change has caused emotions amongst the band to run incredibly high and has greatly impacted the staff and crew involved with My Chemical Romance. In other words, the members themselves have to make adjustments to this change. We also have no idea how long this change will last, or whether it will even revert back to the original. This is very hard on the management team, I, and most of all, the boys. We hope and pray this hiatus will not last longer than it needs to. We truly apologize for the inconvenience,” Brian’s voice caught. “We truly apologize.”


Brain clicked off the tv. Sighing, he ran his fingers through his hair. Watching that speech from last night was too depressing. And that actually was an understatement.
Only last night, last night, were there five grown white men onstage. Frank just had to go off and tell his stupid mishogynistic jokes. Then I get on the bus to find five teenage black girls the next morning, Brian thought. What am I supposed to do with that? For every action, there’s an equal but opposite reaction. The actuality of that statement made Brian groan mentally.

Brian sighed again.

On top of which, they’d all changed their names. And the way they were…acting. Not like any stereotype. Not loud and rowdy. Just…like kids. Little girls. Of course, with Brian being thirty-four, any teenager was a kid to him.

“Brian! I wet myself again!”

Brian woke from his thoughts and stood from the sofa. “Coming,” he said, going through the pile of girls’ clothing for the twentieth time that day. He found a pair of unicorn panties. “Are you serious?” Brian asked the saleswoman earlier that day at K-Mart. “Is this really all you have? They’re like, sixteen. They won’t like these,” he shook his head. “They won’t like these at all.”

“That’s all we have in this size, sir,” the woman said as she rang him up. “It’s very hard to keep the more popular styles in stock in the Juniors’ department.”

For the thousandth time that day, Brian sighed. “Thank you,” he said, collecting the bags. There’d be more sighs to come.

“I’m really sorry we couldn’t find anything else for you, sir.”

“It’s okay,” Brian said. “Supply and demand. It’s something I know very well about. You were very kind. I appreciate your patience like you would not believe.”

The saleswoman beamed, even though she looked very tired.

“BRIAN!”

He snapped back to reality.

Brain knocked on the bathroom door then stuck his hand in.

“Here you go, Mikey.” Brian handed the clean panties to him.

“It’s Milana!” Mikey shrieked.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Brian soothed. “Try to remember to sit down next time, okay? I won’t be mad if you don’t. This is just as hard on me as it is on you.”

Milana shrieked again, more piercing than the last.

“What was that for?” Brian whined.

“Be-CAUSE!!!” Milana shouted, snatching the panties before slamming the door.

Brian sighed.

“Hey Brian. Come see what we made!”

At least they didn’t yell at me, Brian gratefully thought.

He hoisted himself onto Bob’s bunk. “Amanda and…don’t tell me…Regina?” Brian said, pointing to Ray, then Bob. He situated himself on the bunks as they both nodded.

“Now.” Brian pointed. “What’d you all make?”

“It’s a song box!” they both trilled. Regina held up a black box with sparkly red star stickers all over it. “We’re going to put all of our new songs and stuff we write in here,” she said.

“And lyrics,” Amanda said.

Brian touched the box. “Nice,” Brian smiled. “I like it.” He really did.

“We used one of the shoe boxes from earlier,” Regina said.

“We didn’t want it to go to waste,” Amanda said.

“So we recycled it,” Regina said.

“We put it to good use,” Amanda said.

“We didn’t throw it away,” Regina said.

“That wouldn’t’ve been recycling,” Amanda said.

“Not recycling is bad,” Regina said.

“Especially when you can,” Amanda said.

Brian laughed. “I agree with both of you two hundred percent.” He looked at his watch. “It’s almost time for dinner. Where’s Jill?” Brian kicked his feet over the edge and dropped down.


“She was in the bathroom,” Amanda said.

“Before Milana was in there,” Regina said.

“She said she felt sick.”

“That her head was hurting.”

“And her stomach.”

“There—”

Brian put up his hand. “Hold on, girls,” he said. “How long ago did Fr—ah, Jill, say that?”

Amanda shrugged.

Regina shrugged.

Brian sighed.

“You don’t know where she is, do you?”

Regina shook her head.

Amanda shook her head.

“No.”

“No.”

Brian sighed.

“I’ll go find her,” he said, leaving the twins to their chirpy sentence-exchanging.

How did those two end up as twins? Brian thought. This is fucking nuts! How could I have explained this to the everyone anyway? Well, the fans and MCRmy would’ve believed it. Just not the press. Or the government.


“Jill! Come here, please!” Brian called.

“No!” came a muffled voice from somewhere on the bus. Brian’s eye spotted slight movement.
“Jill. You can’t stay under those forever.”

“Watch me!”

Sigh. “You’ll suffocate.”

“I don’t care!”

“Yes you do.”

“No I don’t!”

Sigh. “Okay. You don’t care.”

“NO!”

“I know. I’m agreeing with you.”

“Leave me alone!”

Sigh. “I can’t do that. The label said I have to watch you.”

“Then go away!”

“I can’t do that either.”

“Then stop talking to me!”

Brian didn’t respond.

“Brian?”

He kept silent.

“Brian?”

Still nothing.

“Brian!”

SIGH-lence…

Jill burst into tears.

“Hey, hey, hey…let’s not do that, okay?” Brian pleaded.

“You stopped talking to me!!!” Jill wailed.

“But you said—“Brian started. “Ah, forget it. You come from under there. You’re going to suffocate sobbing like that under that wool blanket.”

“I don’t want to!”

“Frank.”

“JILL!!!!!”

“Jill.”

Snuff. “What?”

“Please come from under the covers.”

“Never!”

Sigh.

“Would you like me to come and sit up there with you?”

Sniffle.

Brian took that as a yes.

“I’m coming up.”

More silence.

“Here I come.”

Brian pulled himself up the bunk. He sat next to Jill. “Come on out, Jillygirl,” Brian coaxed. He slowly and gently pulled the covers from over her head. Jill burst into tears again and buried herself into Brian’s arms.

“You feel bad because it’s your fault everyone’s a girl now.”

“They hate me! Especially Ayako. She hasn’t said anything to me since this morning!”

Brian tilted his head, raising an eyebrow. “Aya…ko?”

“That bitch Gerard!” Jill spat.

“Hey now. You’re sixteen…I think. Your profanity privileges have been revoked until you go back to you original age. I thought Gerard’s name was Annette?”

Jill snorted. “She changed it. I asked her why, and she said because she wanted to confuse me so every time I would say her name, she would change it and would yell at me for calling her by the wrong name.”

Brian sighed.

How much longer?

“It’s weird how you all are teenage girls but you still have some adult male mentality,” Brian said. “Frank, I assume you all were turned into teenage girls because of the sexist jokes you cracked last night.”

“Jill, please,” Frank said. “But why sixteen-year-old girls?”

“Your fan base,” Brain stated matter-of-factly.

“Why black?”

“More minority status to ensure you learns a lesson, I bet. Black women have it harder even still today.”

“Then why all of us?” Jill asked.

“Because insensitivity affects everyone.”

Jill nodded. “Oh.” Jill paused, and then started crying again.

“Jill, darling, why the tears?” Brian soothed. “Tell Brian what’s going on in that head of yours.” He hugged Jill closer to him. She buried her face into his shoulder.

“Bcmf ifm mm fmm fmr fmr mff m grff.”

“What?”

“Because it’s my fault everyone’s a girl.”

Brian couldn’t argue with that.

“Well, regardless, you’re all going to have to get along,” he said. “Otherwise, I have a feeling you all’ll stay like this till the lesson is learned. Plus, I’m having a hard time adjusting to this. I’ve gone from being manager to babysitter. So please go easy on me.”

Jill lifted her head. “We aren’t babies!” Jill said indignantly, her face puffy and eyes red from crying.

“According to the label you are,” Brian said. “Well, minors at the very least. We’re not trying to get CPS involved here. Or the FBI. Or a bunch of Freudians.”

Jill nodded.

“Are you going to cry again?” Brian asked.

Jill burst into tears.

“Okay. I see why. You’re probably going to cry the most out of everyone,” Brian said. He patted Jill's back and smoothed her hair. “But that’s okay, because now that everything’s on hiatus, I’ve got all the time in the world to comfort you.”

“It’s—sob—sorta—sob—like you’re—sob—on vacation,” Jill said.

Brian chuckled. “Vacation,” he said. “Sure. Let’s think of it that way.”








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