Categories > Anime/Manga > Gravitation > Unwanted
A/N: I don't own Gravitation
This was my first Gravi fic, written after only reading volumes 1-3 of the manga and was originally written in Dec of 2004. It's choppy, and a bit awkwardly written in places but it's mine. shrugs
Unwanted
The house was dark and silent when he stepped inside and kicked the door shut behind him. Good. The last thing Eiri wanted right now was a spastic kid jumping all over him and asking about his day...if he wanted to be greeted like that he would have gotten a dog. He flipped on the lamp as he passed it on his way to the kitchen; he was starving and hoped there was something quick to fix. This last deadline kicked his ass and he was definitely feeling it. He tossed his jacket onto the couch and made his way towards the refrigerator and pulled out a beer. Something felt weird...
God it was quiet.
Eiri pulled out some leftover take out and popped it in the microwave, taking a long swallow of beer. It was unusual to have the house to himself; Shuichi was usually listening to loud music and playing video games if he was home. Eiri thought about it for a moment, wasn't Shuichi supposed to be here? He immediately balked at his concern wondering if he was growing soft. Why he was even bothering to wonder about his unwanted houseguest was beyond him...who the fuck cared where Shuichi was as long as he wasn't bothering him.
He finished eating, dumped the styrofoam container into the trash and drained the rest of the bottle. Walking towards the bedroom, Eiri started unbuttoning his shirt and flipped on the light. He looked up and was startled to see Shuichi curled up on the bed facing away from the door. What was he doing here lying in the dark? There is no way that kid could possibly resist attacking him when he came in...maybe he was sick.
"What are you doing in here?" Eiri's voice was filled with the same impatience it always was when he spoke to his lover.
"Nothing."
"Are you sick or something?"
"No."
"Fine, I'm taking a shower."
Eiri shook his head, refusing to get lured into what ever was going on in Shuichi's head. He headed towards the bathroom, tossing his clothes aside as he went. He took his time, enjoying the hot water running over his tired body. Eiri half expected Shuichi to come in and join him, unable to keep up this quiet act...that kid was a spaz and keeping to himself was just not in his nature. He turned off the water and grabbed a towel, still listening for the door to open. Wow, maybe the kid was sick. Wrapping the towel around his slim hips he went back to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, placing the palm of his hand against Shuichi's forehead.
"Alright, give. What's with you?"
Shuichi rolled over to face him, eyes dry and somewhat vacant. He looked at Eiri with a face devoid of emotion. "Why? Do you care?"
"Will you just fucking tell me already and quit it with the theatrics?"
"I'm not being theatrical, I've just been laying here thinking." He looked at Eiri's face and managed a tired smile. "Oh, some chick stopped by and dropped off your t-shirt. She says that she found it stuffed between the cushions of her couch after you left yesterday."
Eiri laughed and smirked down at the boy on the bed. "So that's what this is all about? You're getting your panties in a bunch because of some girl? How pathetic!"
"Yeah...I am pathetic, and that's exactly what I've been thinking about."
Shuichi closed his eyes, unable to look into that hard gaze any longer. He knew that Eiri didn't ask for any of this, but he felt like shit regardless. It just tore him apart that he gave his heart to someone who could care less. He couldn't stand being here any longer, so he swung his legs over the opposite side of the bed and stood up.
"I'm going out."
Eiri just sat there and watched him go. What the fuck got into him anyway? Fuck, he was too tired to deal with this. He pulled the towel off his waist, tossing it absentmindedly on the floor, and slipped between the cool sheets. Let Shuichi have his hissy fit, he was getting some sleep. Eiri tossed and turned for a while before sleep finally took him. It bothered him that he had trouble sleeping without the younger boy sharing his bed and it really pissed him off when he awoke and reached out to realize he was still alone. He sat up and looked at the clock. He'd been asleep for two hours and Shuichi hadn't returned. Eiri sighed loudly and got up to retrieve the kid off the couch; his stubbornness was affecting his sleep and it was going to end now.
He stalked into the living room, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders as he moved, and found the couch empty. Where was he? Eiri spent five minutes searching the house only to find uninhabited guest rooms. Where was he? He knew that Shuichi wouldn't have gone to his parents this late...well, early, and Hiro's parents wouldn't be too thrilled either.
Eiri felt a small ball in the pit of his stomach and it took a minute for him to realize what it was...he was worried. Why would he be worried about such a nuisance? Maybe Shuichi had left him for good, and shouldn't that make him feel relieved? He growled in frustration and went to get dressed; he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep until he found him.
He walked along the deserted streets, the balmy night air caressing his skin. His eyes searched as his mind whirled. What the fuck was he doing out here, he must be nuts? He was a smart guy and already knew the answer but was loathe to admit it. How could he have fallen in love with such a little freak? The fresh air cleared his mind and he thought about his life for the first time in a very long time. He thought about why he took so many women to his bed...he fucked them before they could fuck him over. It didn't take a shrink to tell him that. People were greedy fuckers, and it was imperative to stay on top. Everybody wanted something from him...Hell, even his family wanted something from him. The women wanted the money, the cars, the sex...power...and his family wanted his soul. And then there was Shuichi...what did he want? Shuichi wanted his love, and nothing more, and it just pissed Eiri off more. Money, cars, sex...he could give those willingly, but Shuichi was asking for too much. Why couldn't Shuichi be shallow like everybody else?
He entered the park where they had first met, a night that proved to change everything. If he could take it back, would he? Would he just walk by without hesitating? He walked down familiar paths remembering, a small smile creeping across his lips. Eiri came to the playground and was not surprised to see a lone figure sitting in a swing and kicking slowly at the ground. To see Shuichi like this did something to his heart...what the hell was he doing here?
"Do you planning on sleeping out here?"
Eiri tried to sound teasing, but succeeded in sarcasm. Shuichi looked up surprised and shook his head.
"What are you doing here, Eiri?"
"Looking for you, idiot."
"Why?"
"I don't know..." Eiri's voice was a mere whisper. He walked over and stood between the younger boys legs and looked down into his upturned face. "Tell me what's wrong."
Shuichi took a deep breath, "I don't want to be just another one of your lovers, Eiri." He sounded emotionally spent, his voice tired. "Every time I learn about another one of your women, a little something breaks inside of me. I'm not complaining, and I'm not trying to change you...I'm just questioning if I can keep doing it..."
"Shuichi..."
Shuichi pushed Eiri away and stood, looking his lover in the eye. "I love you, whether you chose to believe it or not, and I just wish it was enough for you...that I was enough for you."
The younger boy skirted around and started walking away. Eiri caught him by the wrist and pulled him back. His mind was filled with confusion and he tried to push aside the obstruction within that was keeping him from being happy. He pulled Shuichi into his arms and it hurt him that the embrace was not reciprocated.
"You are enough for me." He felt Shuichi shaking his head against his chest and sighed with impatience. He lifted the younger boy's chin up so he could look into his eyes, still amazed that they were dry; Shuichi usually cried at the drop of a hat.
"I love you, and you're all that I need."
Shuichi shook his head and laughed bitterly, the sound breaking Eiri's heart. "For how long, Eiri? Until you get bored with me and move on? Until I piss you off and you kick me out? I don't think I can do it-"
"Would you shut up/?! I mean what I say... have I ever /lied to you? I never promised that you'd be the only one! I never promised...until now..." He put his hands around Shuichi's waist and pulled him closer. "I want you to be the only one."
Shuichi eyed him warily; he was teetering on the edge, unsure about which way to fall. Resigning himself to the unknown, he allowed himself to melt into Eiri's embrace, wanting so badly to believe that these promises weren't empty. He looked up into his lover's eyes and gave in to Eiri's possessive kiss, hot and passionate.
Eiri pulled away and reached out a hand. "C'mon, let's go home." They linked hands and started through the park, Shuichi feeling a bit unreal, almost content...not that it took long for Eiri to burst his bubble.
"You do realize that this doesn't mean I'm going to be any nicer." Eiri laughed, pulling Shuichi closer and ruffling his hair. "Much..."
To be continued...
This was my first Gravi fic, written after only reading volumes 1-3 of the manga and was originally written in Dec of 2004. It's choppy, and a bit awkwardly written in places but it's mine. shrugs
Unwanted
The house was dark and silent when he stepped inside and kicked the door shut behind him. Good. The last thing Eiri wanted right now was a spastic kid jumping all over him and asking about his day...if he wanted to be greeted like that he would have gotten a dog. He flipped on the lamp as he passed it on his way to the kitchen; he was starving and hoped there was something quick to fix. This last deadline kicked his ass and he was definitely feeling it. He tossed his jacket onto the couch and made his way towards the refrigerator and pulled out a beer. Something felt weird...
God it was quiet.
Eiri pulled out some leftover take out and popped it in the microwave, taking a long swallow of beer. It was unusual to have the house to himself; Shuichi was usually listening to loud music and playing video games if he was home. Eiri thought about it for a moment, wasn't Shuichi supposed to be here? He immediately balked at his concern wondering if he was growing soft. Why he was even bothering to wonder about his unwanted houseguest was beyond him...who the fuck cared where Shuichi was as long as he wasn't bothering him.
He finished eating, dumped the styrofoam container into the trash and drained the rest of the bottle. Walking towards the bedroom, Eiri started unbuttoning his shirt and flipped on the light. He looked up and was startled to see Shuichi curled up on the bed facing away from the door. What was he doing here lying in the dark? There is no way that kid could possibly resist attacking him when he came in...maybe he was sick.
"What are you doing in here?" Eiri's voice was filled with the same impatience it always was when he spoke to his lover.
"Nothing."
"Are you sick or something?"
"No."
"Fine, I'm taking a shower."
Eiri shook his head, refusing to get lured into what ever was going on in Shuichi's head. He headed towards the bathroom, tossing his clothes aside as he went. He took his time, enjoying the hot water running over his tired body. Eiri half expected Shuichi to come in and join him, unable to keep up this quiet act...that kid was a spaz and keeping to himself was just not in his nature. He turned off the water and grabbed a towel, still listening for the door to open. Wow, maybe the kid was sick. Wrapping the towel around his slim hips he went back to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, placing the palm of his hand against Shuichi's forehead.
"Alright, give. What's with you?"
Shuichi rolled over to face him, eyes dry and somewhat vacant. He looked at Eiri with a face devoid of emotion. "Why? Do you care?"
"Will you just fucking tell me already and quit it with the theatrics?"
"I'm not being theatrical, I've just been laying here thinking." He looked at Eiri's face and managed a tired smile. "Oh, some chick stopped by and dropped off your t-shirt. She says that she found it stuffed between the cushions of her couch after you left yesterday."
Eiri laughed and smirked down at the boy on the bed. "So that's what this is all about? You're getting your panties in a bunch because of some girl? How pathetic!"
"Yeah...I am pathetic, and that's exactly what I've been thinking about."
Shuichi closed his eyes, unable to look into that hard gaze any longer. He knew that Eiri didn't ask for any of this, but he felt like shit regardless. It just tore him apart that he gave his heart to someone who could care less. He couldn't stand being here any longer, so he swung his legs over the opposite side of the bed and stood up.
"I'm going out."
Eiri just sat there and watched him go. What the fuck got into him anyway? Fuck, he was too tired to deal with this. He pulled the towel off his waist, tossing it absentmindedly on the floor, and slipped between the cool sheets. Let Shuichi have his hissy fit, he was getting some sleep. Eiri tossed and turned for a while before sleep finally took him. It bothered him that he had trouble sleeping without the younger boy sharing his bed and it really pissed him off when he awoke and reached out to realize he was still alone. He sat up and looked at the clock. He'd been asleep for two hours and Shuichi hadn't returned. Eiri sighed loudly and got up to retrieve the kid off the couch; his stubbornness was affecting his sleep and it was going to end now.
He stalked into the living room, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders as he moved, and found the couch empty. Where was he? Eiri spent five minutes searching the house only to find uninhabited guest rooms. Where was he? He knew that Shuichi wouldn't have gone to his parents this late...well, early, and Hiro's parents wouldn't be too thrilled either.
Eiri felt a small ball in the pit of his stomach and it took a minute for him to realize what it was...he was worried. Why would he be worried about such a nuisance? Maybe Shuichi had left him for good, and shouldn't that make him feel relieved? He growled in frustration and went to get dressed; he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep until he found him.
He walked along the deserted streets, the balmy night air caressing his skin. His eyes searched as his mind whirled. What the fuck was he doing out here, he must be nuts? He was a smart guy and already knew the answer but was loathe to admit it. How could he have fallen in love with such a little freak? The fresh air cleared his mind and he thought about his life for the first time in a very long time. He thought about why he took so many women to his bed...he fucked them before they could fuck him over. It didn't take a shrink to tell him that. People were greedy fuckers, and it was imperative to stay on top. Everybody wanted something from him...Hell, even his family wanted something from him. The women wanted the money, the cars, the sex...power...and his family wanted his soul. And then there was Shuichi...what did he want? Shuichi wanted his love, and nothing more, and it just pissed Eiri off more. Money, cars, sex...he could give those willingly, but Shuichi was asking for too much. Why couldn't Shuichi be shallow like everybody else?
He entered the park where they had first met, a night that proved to change everything. If he could take it back, would he? Would he just walk by without hesitating? He walked down familiar paths remembering, a small smile creeping across his lips. Eiri came to the playground and was not surprised to see a lone figure sitting in a swing and kicking slowly at the ground. To see Shuichi like this did something to his heart...what the hell was he doing here?
"Do you planning on sleeping out here?"
Eiri tried to sound teasing, but succeeded in sarcasm. Shuichi looked up surprised and shook his head.
"What are you doing here, Eiri?"
"Looking for you, idiot."
"Why?"
"I don't know..." Eiri's voice was a mere whisper. He walked over and stood between the younger boys legs and looked down into his upturned face. "Tell me what's wrong."
Shuichi took a deep breath, "I don't want to be just another one of your lovers, Eiri." He sounded emotionally spent, his voice tired. "Every time I learn about another one of your women, a little something breaks inside of me. I'm not complaining, and I'm not trying to change you...I'm just questioning if I can keep doing it..."
"Shuichi..."
Shuichi pushed Eiri away and stood, looking his lover in the eye. "I love you, whether you chose to believe it or not, and I just wish it was enough for you...that I was enough for you."
The younger boy skirted around and started walking away. Eiri caught him by the wrist and pulled him back. His mind was filled with confusion and he tried to push aside the obstruction within that was keeping him from being happy. He pulled Shuichi into his arms and it hurt him that the embrace was not reciprocated.
"You are enough for me." He felt Shuichi shaking his head against his chest and sighed with impatience. He lifted the younger boy's chin up so he could look into his eyes, still amazed that they were dry; Shuichi usually cried at the drop of a hat.
"I love you, and you're all that I need."
Shuichi shook his head and laughed bitterly, the sound breaking Eiri's heart. "For how long, Eiri? Until you get bored with me and move on? Until I piss you off and you kick me out? I don't think I can do it-"
"Would you shut up/?! I mean what I say... have I ever /lied to you? I never promised that you'd be the only one! I never promised...until now..." He put his hands around Shuichi's waist and pulled him closer. "I want you to be the only one."
Shuichi eyed him warily; he was teetering on the edge, unsure about which way to fall. Resigning himself to the unknown, he allowed himself to melt into Eiri's embrace, wanting so badly to believe that these promises weren't empty. He looked up into his lover's eyes and gave in to Eiri's possessive kiss, hot and passionate.
Eiri pulled away and reached out a hand. "C'mon, let's go home." They linked hands and started through the park, Shuichi feeling a bit unreal, almost content...not that it took long for Eiri to burst his bubble.
"You do realize that this doesn't mean I'm going to be any nicer." Eiri laughed, pulling Shuichi closer and ruffling his hair. "Much..."
To be continued...
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