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Ryan woke up the next morning. According to Spencer's small digital clock next to his bed, it was ten a.m, flashing in red numbers. Spencer wasn't there, although Ryan knew he must've woke up already. His sleeve was still pulled up, up to Ryan's elbow, and slowly pulled it down, covering half of his palm now. Ryan sat up on Spencer's bed, and rubbed his eyes a bit, groaning at the sight of the dark gray stains on his hands.

Ryan walked over to the bathroom, and turned on the water, washing the dark gray stains off his hands. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. His pale skin, honey-colored eyes, and brown hair, covering his left eye. Somehow he looked different, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

Ryan walked back into Spencer's room, and sighs. There wasn't much left for Ryan to do here. So, Ryan made his way out of the room, and walked down the stairs. "Ryan!" Ryan turned his head to the side, seeing that Spencer was relaxing on the couch in the living room.

"Um, hey Spence. I'm going to head home right now, if that's okay with you.." Ryan said, as he zipped up his sweater halfway.

"Yeah, here I'll walk you out," Spencer says, as he and Ryan both walked over to the front door. Spencer opened the door, and Ryan turned to look at him. "Hey, do you think we can hang out later?" Ryan asked.

"Um, I can't.. I, uh.. have some family stuff to do," Spencer says, shrugging a bit.

"Oh, okay, well, I'll see you around then," Ryan said, as he turned around. He heard the door slam, knowing it was closed now. Ryan sighed, and started to walk back home.

His house door was unlocked when he arrived home, so he just opened it, closing it behind him. Ryan's dad was standing in the middle of the room, looking straight at him. "Where were you?" his dad slurred. His deep, angry voice and narrowered eyes made Ryan look like a deer in headlights. "I was at Spencer's house, his mom called you yesterday," Ryan says, slowly making his way to the staircase.

"I know that! But why? You still need someone to tuck you in at night?" His father slurred. Ryan sighed and walked up the stairs, and into his room. His dad was obviously drunk again. Ryan locked the door in his room.

Ryan sighed, as the details from the previous night flashed in his head. He had told Spencer about Brendon, which Jon & Spencer already knew about. And the cutting. Spencer saw the cuts. He just hoped Spencer wouldn't tell anybody about the cutting. Especially not Brendon.

He kneeled down on the floor, opening his guitar case, and lifting the lid open. Ryan took out his guitar, and sat down on his bed, with his guitar on his lap. His guitar was a bit worn-out, but it was still able produce good quality sound. Ryan strung a few chords, until he found a small bit of a rhythm. He leaned back on his bed, still strumming those same chords he had previously played.

Ryan wanted to do something today, not right now of course. But later, around the middle of the day. He wanted to go see a movie with Spencer, and pretend like nothing is wrong. Spencer said he had some family stuff to do, whatever that meant.

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It was almost five o'clock, and Ryan had been writing a new song for the past couple of hours. It turned out all right so far. So he would finish the other half of it later on. Just because Spencer was busy didn't mean Ryan couldn't go out and try to have some fun. So Ryan got dressed in his usual attire; Skinny jeans, t-shirt and black sweater on. Along with his eyeliner.

Ryan slowly made his way out of his room and downstairs, seeing that his dad was sleeping on the couch. Not that it was anything new. He walked out of his house, shivering a bit from how cold it was already. Ryan walked down the street; it was only a few blocks away from the movie theater. He had enough money for a ticket to buy for himself.

About twenty minutes later, Ryan had made it to the movie theaters, and stood in front of it, looking at the movies in display.

"Ry?" Ryan turned around to see Spencer, Jon, Brendon, and a girl walking out the doors. "Um, hey," Ryan says, confused now. Spencer said he had family stuff to do. Spencer looked at him, wide-eyed.

"What were you guys doing?" Ryan asks, as he looked at the three of them. Jon looked at Ryan, smiling nervously. "We were watching a movie here," Jon says. Ryan's eyes flickered over to Spencer. "Family stuff?" Ryan asks. Now Ryan understood. Spencer had lied to him when he said he had 'family stuff' to do. And what made it worse, they didn't invite Ryan to come along, and he noticed Brendon having his arm around the girl's waist.

Ryan turned around and started to quickly walk away from him, ignoring Spencer's calls, telling Ryan to come back. He ran. A couple blocks away, Ryan leaned against a brick wall, tears already welling up in his eyes. If his friends didn't even want him, who did Ryan have? This was the worst day of his life. His best friend had lied to him, and none of them had even bothered to invite Ryan to come with them. Because they didn't want him to. The guy he loved more than anything else in the world had a girlfriend. So Brendon was straight. Ryan didn't have a chance with him now.

Even after Ryan had confessed to Spencer, telling him of his worries, this ended up happening. Eventually, when it started to get dark, and night was on its way, Ryan started walking back home, with tears falling down his pale cheeks.

He couldn't ignore the constant throbbing in his chest. Ryan knew that feeling well. It was heartbreak.

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