Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Mean.... Boys? A MCR Parody of Mean Girls
"They have this book! They put all these pictures in and write shit about all the girls in the school!" I told Lindsey as she was restocking various creams to make you face look more radiant or some shit.
"Am I in there?" She asked.
I hesitated. "Uhh no" right thing? Hope so.
"Those bitches!" she slammed down some mango scented lotion. 'note to self, by mango lotion to impress Gerard... He seems like the guy who likes mangos.'
"Will this make my feet softer? You know my pointe shoes kill my feet" Jarred said. Yes, Jarred dances. Ballet to be more specific.
"Jarred honey, that's what guys put on their wang after they have sex" Lindsey said with a straight face. I cracked up as Jarred threw down the cream and went to sanitize his hands.
Math Next Day
Honestly Miss Hayes, no one gives a fuck about "Linear Expressions". I learned this shit already. Oh look, Gerard got a trim, how cute.
"Frank?"
Ahh shit.
"The rise in -2,1?" please be right!
"Good"
Phew.
The bell rang for study, which I have this teacher for study so I stayed.
"Hey uhm my cousin is having a Halloween party on Halloween of course. You can come if you like..." Gerard turned around and asked me.
Holy shit that man is a god.
"Uhm yeah sure. I'm probably getting some money for my birthday so I'll buy some drinks" I said casually.
"That'll be great! Oh, when's your birthday?" he tilted his head.
:Dear diary, today me and Gerard had the longest conversation together. He asked me when my birthday was. I almost fainted. But I kept cool:
"Halloween" I replied.
"Wicked! Hey I have to run. Looks like we should rename the holiday "Ieroween" you get it? Ha ha bye" and with that he took his sexy flesh and left the class.
I put my head in my hand and sighed.
He'll never love anything like me.
Franks House
I was sitting in my room playing my guitar when my phone rang.
"Heyo?"
"You like Gerard. It's Bert."
Shit on ducks.
"Uhmmm" I didn't know what to say.
"Dude that's totally cool. Go out with him."
Uhm....
"Oh uhm okay."
"I could talk to him for you if you want. But aren't you mad Ray told me?"
Well....
"Uhm yeah that was totally bitchy of him to do but I guess he likes all the attention"
"Ugh! I thought we were friends" it was Ray on the third end.
"Byye!" Birt said.
I just encountered my first three way phone call attack.
Halloween. Uhh I mean Ieroween
I gingerly walked to Gerard's cousin's house dressed as Edward Scissorhands. I hope I didn't over do it.
Boy, I hoped wrong. I opened the door to find skanky costumes. Even the boys... Well most of the boys here a gay. So that makes sense.
"Loving the costume" the voice scared me. I turned around to see Gerard dressed as Paris Hilton. Pink bikini and all. I giggled at his appearance.
"Happy Ieroween!" he said opening his arms for a hug. I slowly hugged him taking in his coffee scent and sniff MANGOS! I so told you.
"Catch ya later!" he said going to join a game of beer pong.
I got up with guys about two minutes later. Bert was Brittany Spears, Ray was Madonna, and Bob was Cindy Lauper.
"Woahhh honey, too scary." Bert said with the other guys laughing. I laughed too because, well I did over do it.
"Oh my god Pete is so hot" said Bob.
"Dude, that's your cousin!" Ray said disgusted.
"Well he's my first cousin. There's your cousins then your first cousins"
"No honey just stop" Ray put his hand up.
"I'm gonna talk to Gerard for you. BRB bitches!" Bert walked away in diva style.
I hope this will work out.
Bert's POV
"Heyy bitch!" I said sliding my hand up his abs. This man was too hot for that Frank kid.
"I'm not your bitch Bert" he said to me taking my hand off his abs.
"Listen this isn't about me-"
"For once!"
"Just listen! You know my friend Frank right? Well he has this big crush on you. Like he he writes your name all over his books and "Mr. Gerard Way" "I love Gee Gee". He also has a pair of tighty whities that have "I love Gerard" written on them. He wears them everyday. He takes your used tissues and your sweaty socks and does this voodoo thing to make you fall on love with him. But don't make fun of him, I'm his only friend" I mentally smirked at my lies.
Gerard's face was priceless.
"Kiss me you animal" I said.
I grabbed his neck and shoved my younger down his throat knowing, that Frank was watching.
____
HIIIIII! Sorry for the shortness!
I would like to thank unitedsuck007 killjoyblackrose lolhai and sheXxie for encouraging me to keep on writing
"Am I in there?" She asked.
I hesitated. "Uhh no" right thing? Hope so.
"Those bitches!" she slammed down some mango scented lotion. 'note to self, by mango lotion to impress Gerard... He seems like the guy who likes mangos.'
"Will this make my feet softer? You know my pointe shoes kill my feet" Jarred said. Yes, Jarred dances. Ballet to be more specific.
"Jarred honey, that's what guys put on their wang after they have sex" Lindsey said with a straight face. I cracked up as Jarred threw down the cream and went to sanitize his hands.
Math Next Day
Honestly Miss Hayes, no one gives a fuck about "Linear Expressions". I learned this shit already. Oh look, Gerard got a trim, how cute.
"Frank?"
Ahh shit.
"The rise in -2,1?" please be right!
"Good"
Phew.
The bell rang for study, which I have this teacher for study so I stayed.
"Hey uhm my cousin is having a Halloween party on Halloween of course. You can come if you like..." Gerard turned around and asked me.
Holy shit that man is a god.
"Uhm yeah sure. I'm probably getting some money for my birthday so I'll buy some drinks" I said casually.
"That'll be great! Oh, when's your birthday?" he tilted his head.
:Dear diary, today me and Gerard had the longest conversation together. He asked me when my birthday was. I almost fainted. But I kept cool:
"Halloween" I replied.
"Wicked! Hey I have to run. Looks like we should rename the holiday "Ieroween" you get it? Ha ha bye" and with that he took his sexy flesh and left the class.
I put my head in my hand and sighed.
He'll never love anything like me.
Franks House
I was sitting in my room playing my guitar when my phone rang.
"Heyo?"
"You like Gerard. It's Bert."
Shit on ducks.
"Uhmmm" I didn't know what to say.
"Dude that's totally cool. Go out with him."
Uhm....
"Oh uhm okay."
"I could talk to him for you if you want. But aren't you mad Ray told me?"
Well....
"Uhm yeah that was totally bitchy of him to do but I guess he likes all the attention"
"Ugh! I thought we were friends" it was Ray on the third end.
"Byye!" Birt said.
I just encountered my first three way phone call attack.
Halloween. Uhh I mean Ieroween
I gingerly walked to Gerard's cousin's house dressed as Edward Scissorhands. I hope I didn't over do it.
Boy, I hoped wrong. I opened the door to find skanky costumes. Even the boys... Well most of the boys here a gay. So that makes sense.
"Loving the costume" the voice scared me. I turned around to see Gerard dressed as Paris Hilton. Pink bikini and all. I giggled at his appearance.
"Happy Ieroween!" he said opening his arms for a hug. I slowly hugged him taking in his coffee scent and sniff MANGOS! I so told you.
"Catch ya later!" he said going to join a game of beer pong.
I got up with guys about two minutes later. Bert was Brittany Spears, Ray was Madonna, and Bob was Cindy Lauper.
"Woahhh honey, too scary." Bert said with the other guys laughing. I laughed too because, well I did over do it.
"Oh my god Pete is so hot" said Bob.
"Dude, that's your cousin!" Ray said disgusted.
"Well he's my first cousin. There's your cousins then your first cousins"
"No honey just stop" Ray put his hand up.
"I'm gonna talk to Gerard for you. BRB bitches!" Bert walked away in diva style.
I hope this will work out.
Bert's POV
"Heyy bitch!" I said sliding my hand up his abs. This man was too hot for that Frank kid.
"I'm not your bitch Bert" he said to me taking my hand off his abs.
"Listen this isn't about me-"
"For once!"
"Just listen! You know my friend Frank right? Well he has this big crush on you. Like he he writes your name all over his books and "Mr. Gerard Way" "I love Gee Gee". He also has a pair of tighty whities that have "I love Gerard" written on them. He wears them everyday. He takes your used tissues and your sweaty socks and does this voodoo thing to make you fall on love with him. But don't make fun of him, I'm his only friend" I mentally smirked at my lies.
Gerard's face was priceless.
"Kiss me you animal" I said.
I grabbed his neck and shoved my younger down his throat knowing, that Frank was watching.
____
HIIIIII! Sorry for the shortness!
I would like to thank unitedsuck007 killjoyblackrose lolhai and sheXxie for encouraging me to keep on writing
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