FicWad

It's been four months since he left. It's been four months since the last time he spoke to anyone but Mick. It's also been four months since his best friend Tommy has been happy. Four months ago Nikki Sixx quit on his own creation. He quit on the band that he and Tommy had breathed life into and called their own. One day he didn't show up for rehearsals. The next day he called Mick and said that he was quitting Crüe. He just left and didn't tell anyone why. Vince couldn't have cared less and Mick wasn't phased much, but Tommy was on the brink of a mental breakdown. He tried everything to get Nikki to talk it over with him but it was no use. He'd call and he'd get the answering machine. He'd come over and Nikki would be out somewhere else. One night about a month ago Tommy went over to his best friend's house to find him but instead he found something horrible and unexpected. Nikki was gone. He had moved out and now Tommy had no chance of finding him. The drummer thought about the past four months as he sat in the corner of the studio with a cigarette between his teeth. He was completely on edge and no one knew how to help him, not that anyone really cared. Vince was too obsessed with cocaine and hookers and Mick was always to drunk to notice anything.

Tommy looked absolutely horrible. He was turning a sickly grayish yellow color from not sleeping or eating. Whenever he did manage to fall asleep he woke up screaming after a few hours. Every night he dreamt of the worst possible things that could've happened to Nikki. Nikki, his best friend could be dead and be wouldn't even know it. It tore the drummer apart but he couldn't do anything about it. His nightmares were ruling his life and he couldn't stop them. As a result of this sleep deprivation, he had huge bags under his eyes and he was more sensitive than usual. Everything set him off in one way or another. Sometimes he just sat around and cried and other days he was just pissed off at everyone.

"How about we go to a club guys." Vince said staring out the window in boredom. His expression was blank as he twirled his light blonde hair between his fingers. "Sure." Mick answered in an uninterested tone. Tommy just shrugged and got up, still on edge and still deep in thought. He once vibrant, but now dulled, brown eyes turned to Mick. He knew the guitarist knew something about Nikki and he was going go to find out what. "Wait up a minute Mick." he called to the guitarist as Vince walked out to his car. The older man looked at Tommy and acted as if he hadn't seen him in months. The guitarist's face was conflicted with pity and disgust as he looks the drummer over, "You look fucking awful dude. Have you slept at all lately?" Upon saying this Mick realized what was happening to his friend, "Is this about Sixx?" tue guitarist folded his arms over his chest and gave Tommy a serious and knowing look. Tears filled the over emotional drummer's eyes as he hung his head and nodded. He inhaled shakily and said, "What happened to him? I need to know Mick... Please." he was practically begging for information, but the guitarist looked worried. Mick scratched the back of his head and sat down on the couch, "He's uh... having a hard time right now Tom. He's just a little... confused is all." the guitarist had a hard time picking his words but they weren't enough for Tommy, not by a long shot. "Why did he leave?" the drummer clenched his teeth and growled, making the guitarist shift uncomfortably in his seat. The younger man's brow furrowed with confusion. Why was it so hard to get an answer?

"He..." the older man scratched the back of his head, "fell in.. love." Mick hesitated and cleared his throat, "with you." the last part was almost enough to send the drummer into another emotional spiral. Tommy's jaw dropped, and his cigarette fell to the floor. He got up from his seat and ran a hand through his long, thick hair. He started pacing back and forth as he tried to process the information he was just given. How was he supposed to feel about this? When did Nikki start to like him? Did Tommy have feelings for his best friend? Questions just kept bubbling up in the drummer's mind, but they could wait. He still didn't understand why Sixx had quit. It made no sense. Why would Nikki quit if he loved Tommy? "I-I don't get what your saying... Why would he quit if he..." Tommy squeezed his eyes shut as he sunk back into his seat, dropping his head into his hands. He couldn't let those last few words pass through his bared teeth, so he left the sentence hanging. Mick understood what he meant and shrugged, "He said it was too painful to be around you and he felt like he couldn't tell you." the guitarist exhaled and grabbed a smoke from his back pocket, handing one to Tommy. The drummer just sat there for a minute staring at the floor, smoke spilling from his slightly parted lips. "Are you coming or not?!" Vince yelled from outside, shattering the uneasy silence. The two men stood up and walked out to the car, one having lifted a weight off their shoulders and one feeling as if he was carrying a world of pain on his back.

When they reached the car Vince was drumming his fingers on the wheel impatiently, scowling at them as they climbed into the vehicle. "About time..." the blond muttered as he started the engine. The only sound in the car was that of the radio which happened to be playing Too Fast For Love. Tommy leaned against the window, freezing sweat beginning to bead up on his neck. He tried to focus on breathing as they drove down to The Body Shop. The drummer closed his eyes and tried to forget his worries. The moment the car stopped his eyes flew open and he thought to himself, 'You WILL have a good time Tom, just don't think too much.' Tommy just repeated this over and over again in his head as he climbed out of the car. For a split second he actually felt better. The warm California sunlight kissed his light skin and the smog had seemed to lift for a moment. This good vibe was destroyed the moment he started to think. He just couldn't help but think about how he felt about Nikki. Did he like him? Love him? Want him? The drummer shook his head and cleared his mind again. He forced his legs to move as he followed Mick inside the club while Vince occupied himself with some girls in the parking lot.

Trembling slightly, Tommy sat down at the bar. Mick had gone off with some girls and the drummer was grateful to be alone so he could sort all this shit out. He ordered an entire bottle of Jack Daniels, which earned him some strange looks. He wrapped his fingers around the bottle and tossed his head back, downing about a third of the bottle. He shook his head, his long dark hair bouncing around his shoulders. Tommy was just about to begin a war between the two sides of his mind, one side favoring his affection for Nikki and the other side favoring their friendship, when a girl caught his eye. She had thick black hair that covered her eyes almost completely and the most peculiar face shape Tommy had ever seen. She was slight and slender, and her ribs were protruding from under her ripped tank top. She had long, toned legs, the kind of legs that a guitarist would have from running around a stage. Tommy racked his brain for where he had seen this girl before. He knew that face and that body, but he couldn't think of a name. He shrugged and brought the bottle back to his lips. The drummer jumped a little when Vince suddenly plopped onto the stool next to him. He had at least six girls with him and he was totally buzzed, "T-bone what's up man?! We gotta get you a chick!" he yelled over the blaring music of the club. The singer whistled at the tall, dark haired girl that Tommy had been assessing. He signaled her over to them, "Show my friend here a good time will ya?!" he laughed as he got off his stool. The blond walked off, his entourage following him every step of the way.

Tommy looked over the girl's face carefully. She blushed and played with her hair nervously. The drummer held out the bottle of JD to her and she took it gratefully. She chugged the remainder of the booze in one shot. Tommy watched in amazement. He'd only seen one other person who could drink like that, but he couldn't think of who it was. He ordered two more bottles and handed one to the girl. Once the booze had arrived the girl grabbed Tommy by the collar of his shirt and pulled him into one of the back rooms. She pushed him onto a dingy little couch and locked the door. The drummer hadn't noticed before but she was wearing a short leather skirt, a ripped up tank top with Mötley Crüe written on it, and six inch heels. She giggled in a low seductive voice and made her way over to the pole in the center of the room. Tommy didn't get it. This girl didn't have that much going for her; she had no boobs, no ass, and a deranged look to her. Why was he so drawn to her? He gave up trying to figure out the answer and leaned back into the couch. The girl smiled deviantly as she wrapped one leg around the pole. She licked her lips and began to dance. Tommy's jaw dropped open as his brain shut down from amazement. He watched how she moved and felt a rush of nostalgia hit him. He only knew one person who could move like that in heels. Nikki. The name ran through his head as he took a sip of Jack. He tore his mind away from that thought and went back to watching his playmate. The drummer made an audible gasp when he saw something that shouldn't have been where it was. It COULDN'T have been where it was.

When the girl twisted just right a scar on her left thigh was revealed. Tommy knew this scar a mile away. It was a burn that Nikki had gotten from using too much pyro gel at one of their first gigs. He had a thing for lighting himself on fire while he played bass. The bassist could barely walk after the show and Tommy had to carry him home and treat his wound. They had laughed and joked around about it all night. The bottle of JD slipped from Tommy's trembling fingers and the girl stopped dancing. She looked nervous again as she tried to hide her face in her thick hair. The drummer got up and practically ran over to her. He grabbed her arms and flipped them over. His heart beat erratically as his eyes traced over the track marks. He was less then a foot from her now and, still holding her, he observed her face. Those lips, that nose, and there was no mistaking those pale, green eyes. "Nikki?" the drummer asked in a hoarse whisper. The girl's eyes went wide and she shook he head. Tommy was growing impatient, "Say something Sixx I know it's you." he was sure of it. She inhaled shakily, "Hey T-bone." the dancer said in a voice that soothed Tommy's aching heart. He'd needed to hear that voice for the past four months. The drummer wrapped his arms around the smaller man and nearly broke down. "What the hell are you doing here?" he asked incredulously. Nikki gazed at the floor and responded softly, "I... I needed to make money... The manager thought I was a chick and he gave me a job." the bassist looked into Tommy's eyes with a powerful intensity, "Quitting Crüe was the biggest mistake of my life..." the drummer held Nikki's chin and smiled, "No. The biggest mistake that you ever made was not telling me about how you felt." The smaller man blushed in embarrassment and looked away from Tommy's deep brown eyes. The drummer nudged Nikki's cheek with his nose before planting a light kiss on his cheek, "I missed you Nikki. Let's get out of here." he mumbled against the bassist's soft skin. "Tommy... I have nothing left, no where to go." Nikki said in a high pitched whisper as if he were about to cry. Tommy grabbed his face and kissed him softly and sweetly on the lips, "That's why you're gonna come and live with me." he said when their lips parted. They stayed wrapped around each other for a few minutes before heading out. They walked back to Tommy's house and caught up with each other. They talked about what was happening now, but for the most part they reminisced. They had so many memories together, but this was one they'd never forget. They would never, for as long as they lived, forget about that one fateful night at the Body Shop.