FicWad

Gerard felt like an idiot the moment the word left his mouth. He didn’t mean to say it, it just…it had slipped out. His cheeks reddened and he glanced at Frank, who was smiling encouragingly.

“What?” came the voice on the other line. Not angry, just…confused. And rightly so.

“Umm…” Gerard tried to compose himself, but was feeling very flustered. His father. His daddy. Right there, on the phone. Perhaps somewhere nearby. In an office somewhere, doing things that fathers did before leaving and going home to their sons. “I…It’s Gerard.”

The other end of the line was silent, and Gerard held his breath. He’d hung up; he just knew he’d hung up. He’d left for a reason, and he’d even specified that he didn’t want calls that weren’t emergencies. Gerard bit his lip and took a deep breath. He was a fool. Foolish, immature, whimsical. What had he been thinking? He--

“Gerard?” The boy’s heart leapt; he’d replied! He was still on the other line. He hadn’t hung up yet, which was a good sign so far, right? “Gerard…my Gerard?” Gerard bristled; he was no one’s Gerard. However, he knew better than to bring up his father’s absence before they’d actually established whether or not the conversation would continue.

“Yes. Yeah, it’s me,” Gerard replied. Of course, he hadn’t planned out what to say. He should have written something down, like an interviewer. Topics to discuss, current events, pop-culture icons, anything…This silence was unbearable. “S-sorry…” he stuttered. “Um…I know you said only to call for an emergency, but…I mean, this…I mean…uhh…” Words? Stringing words together to form coherent thoughts? What was that? Gerard pushed his free hand through his hair nervously.

“No, no, it’s fine, bud.” He didn’t sound nervous at all. So composed, so put-together; it was as though he had been prepared for this, prepared for anything. “I…Well, this was unexpected. Hmm…Listen, bud, I bet you want to talk.” Gerard nodded, forgetting that his father couldn’t see him in his desperation to keep hearing his voice. “Well, I get off in a few minutes. How about I come down to the hospital after I get out and we can talk then? The phone isn’t exactly a prime medium for something like this.”

“Uh…Yeah! Yeah, I mean…That’s fine. That would be great. I guess…I guess I’ll see you soon, then.”

“Alright, kiddo. I should be there within the hour. See you then.” With that, the line went dead, and Gerard was clutching the dial tone, not quite believing what had just happened.

“Well? What did he say?” Frank pressed when he could no longer take the silence.

“He--he said he’ll be here within the hour.” Gerard was staring at his phone, wondering vaguely if his father would just climb out of it and continue their conversation. At this point, it didn’t seem like anything was impossible.

“That’s great!” Frank gasped, throwing his arms around his boyfriend’s neck. “Gee, that’s amazing! Oh my God, see? Aren’t you glad you called? Oh my God.”

“Wow,” Gerard breathed, feeling almost numb, he was so shocked.

“What do you think you guys are gonna talk about?” Frank reached forward and grabbed Gerard’s hand excitedly. Gerard pulled away slowly, leaning back in his chair.

“I don’t know. Maybe we’ll catch up on the past six years. Maybe he’ll just ask why I called. I don’t know. I wish I did.”

“Well, whatever happens, at least now, you don’t have to spend the rest of your life wondering.”

“Yeah,” Gerard murmured. He suddenly felt very drowsy; his eyelids drooped and his head lolled onto his chest.

“You seem tired, baby,” Frank said affectionately.

“I am,” Gerard murmured, stifling a yawn. “I didn’t get any sleep last night.” He leaned forward, pressing his face into Frank’s shoulder. The other boy chuckled and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s back.

“I want you to go home and get some sleep tonight, okay?”

“I can’t leave--”

“Gerard, please. Mikey’s not going anywhere. You’re of no help to him if you’re hallucinating from lack of sleep. Not to mention, you still have a job, and you need to keep your health up.” Gerard sighed, thinking longingly of his bed…and his sheets…and his pillows…

“I don’t want to be alone,” Gerard admitted, blushing. He avoided having to look at Frank by glancing down at Mikey, who was still, lo and behold, unconscious. It seemed as though the rise and fall of his chest were more noticeable.

“You could come stay with us.”

“No thanks,” Gerard snorted, imagining himself waking up on Bryar’s floor.

“Well…I could keep you company at your house…” Frank muttered, taking his turn to avoid his boyfriend’s eyes.

“Uhh…” Gerard panicked. He didn’t want to say no, but he wasn’t ready for what sleeping over implied…

“We wouldn’t have to do anything, of course!” Frank added quickly, cheeks reddening even more. “I mean, you know, just so you don’t get frightened. Just to sleep. Just until the morning when we come back here?”

“I--I don’t know that that’s such a good idea,” Gerard said, biting his lip. Saying nothing was going to happen and actually keeping things from happening were two very different concepts.

“You can’t just keep spending sleepless nights in this hospital, Gerard. It’s not healthy.” He reached for Gerard’s hand, but the other teen jerked it away, hand turning to fist.

“Stop telling me what to do!” he exclaimed, fuming. He ran his unclenched hand through his hair, frustrated. “I’m tired of everyone telling me what I should do.” Sure, maybe he was taking out his nerves and lack of sleep on the only person that seemed to be genuinely caring for him at the moment. Sure, maybe it was just his worry at the idea of his what kind of threat the return of his father could pose that was making him like this, but Gerard had to take out his pent-up frustration on someone.

“I’m not telling you what to do, Gerard. I care about you, and I want you to be healthy, and happy. Don’t you want you to be happy?” Frank asked. Gerard looked away.

“You’re right,” he murmured. He rubbed his temples. “I’m just nervous,” he admitted.

“I know. Listen, I’ll leave for a while, intercept Ray and Harper so you and your dad can get some privacy, and I’ll be back later when you want to go home. Sound good?” Gerard nodded. Frank stood. “Okay. I’ll see you later. I love you,” he added, leaning down and kissing the top of Gerard’s head.

“Mhmm…” Gerard murmured, sitting back and pushing his hand through Mikey’s sandy-colored hair. Frank hesitated; Gerard could tell that the other boy wasn’t satisfied with this response. However, he simply shrugged and walked out, offering a wan smile and a half-hearted wave with his departure.

Gerard sat back and rubbed his eyes, a knot of nerves forming in the pit of his stomach at the impending visit of his estranged father. Shit.



DON'T KILL ME. I am so very sorry I haven't updated in so long. There are many different excuses I could give, most prominent being that I'm just absolutely stumped on this story. I am so flip-flopped. I feel like I'm getting my groove back, I write a chapter or two, and then I completely lose it. More than once, I've given serious thought to scrapping this story completely so I can completely concentrate on my baby, Stockholm Syndrome. However, I decided against that. If I do anything like that, I'm just going to scrap my ideas for the rest of the story and end it. I know some of you may not want to hear this, but I'm sorry. I thought I knew where I was going, but I just don't. If I could just hand this story off to someone else, I'd do it in a heartbeat. I don't know. I feel bad, but I also know that there's no use denying the inevitable. Either way, the meeting with Donald Way IS happening in the next chapter, and the next chapter IS coming. So, with that in mind, go comment/subscribe, please, and tell me your stance on the end it/don't end it debacle. OverAndOutxx