FicWad

Gerard was shaking that morning as he walked into work, trembling from anticipation. He'd built it all up in his head; whether he'd be able to contain himself, how Frank would taunt and tease and frustrate him, how he wouldn't give in. What if he couldn't manage? What if he let himself down?
He swung the door open and stepped inside, ignoring the immediately piercing glare of Frank's inquisitive eyes.
“Hey sexy,” he smirked, and Gerard couldn't help but look up at him – he tried to fill his face with resent, but he just looked kind of turned on. “Nice sleep?”
“No.” Gerard said bluntly, turning away and walking out quickly to put his jacket in the back room. When he turned to leave he found Frank standing in the doorway, grinning at him with a knowing look etched on his face.
“What?” he asked, heart racing again.
After Frank had left him, standing half-naked in his driveway as hard as a fucking house and willing to beg for more, the weight of what he'd just done had come crashing down. He knew he wasn't the best liar and if his wife – no, fiancée – ever found out, she would quite literally murder him in his sleep. At least I'd be saved from this hopeless situation, he'd thought. The strong dislike he'd initially felt for Frank came creeping back as he tried to twist the opinion he'd formed of him: Frank wasn't hot, he just wore ridiculously tight jeans and definitely had too many tattoos decorating his small, neat body. He wasn't funny, he was an idiot, and he'd practically blackmailed him into smoking again, something that he'd started getting into all over again, something that he'd sworn he'd left behind...
He remembered Frank's voice, low and almost sexual... “...about how you keep whispering things in my ear and putting your mouth on my neck and telling me that I'm much fucking hotter than her, and that you reckon I'd be a good fuck?”...“that you get hard over simply my presence, and that I have to give you special toilet breaks every few hours so you can jerk off and get rid of it?”
He shuddered and tried to get the threateningly gorgeous voice that he point blank refused to be turned on by out of his head, but...
“I said, did you have a nice sleep?” Frank repeated. There it was again, almost a growl.
“And I said, no.” Gerard raised his eyebrows in disbelief as Frank leant against the doorframe, smirking. He frowned slightly.
“Well, why not? My night was just, fantastic...” he gazed up behind Gerard, smirking slightly still, but the pure confidence in his expression was gone. Instead, there was determination...
When Gerard didn't ask why, Frank continued anyway, not letting him pass. “You see, I have a very vivid imagination, especially in my dreams.” he started, nodding wisely. Fuck, no. Gerard saw where this was going, and he knew that if he heard it he wouldn't be able to help himself: he tried stepping past Frank but the doorway wasn't big enough and Frank wouldn't budge, lips poised carefully in a 'try me' sort of way. And oh, how Gerard wanted to try them.
“And you were in my dream, Gee. You were so gorgeous, and now, today when you just walked in you look even more gorgeous than the version I dreamed...” his eyes sparkled as Gerard looked away, his face going noticeably red. “Aw, you went red in my dream too.” he paused, tongue tracing his own lips absent mindedly. “you went red because you couldn't breathe fast enough when I was fucking you so goddamned hard against the wall.”
“W-what?” Gerard stammered.
“It was only a dream, Gerard, only a dream, inspired by yesterday's wonderful experience.” his lips curved into a smirk again. “But it still made me extremely hard. And wet. I had to change my sheets because of you.”
Gerard found himself having to breathe deeply, patiently, slowly as he felt Frank's words wrapping around his mind like a thick, foggy blanket – blocking everything else out, and turning him on despite the fact that he'd repetitively sworn to himself that he wouldn't let that happen.
“So, I'll ask you again...nice fucking sleep?” he waited and the air grew heavy with silence. Gerard couldn't bring himself to reply; he didn't know what he'd let slip out of his unreliable mouth. So as the silence deepened, so did the overwhelming desire to sweep Frank off his feet with kisses and carry him off somewhere dark and small where they could scream eachother's names as they fucked...
They heard the door open and the bell ring out, cracking the moment down the middle as the silence shattered. “No.” Gerard concluded, pushing Frank out of his way and storming into the shop to greet a slightly intimidating middle-aged, balding customer. “How can I help you?” he smiled sweetly, not realising how camp he sounded.
The hours passed and Gerard tried his hardest to avoid Frank, but when working together all day in the same room, contact was inevitable; especially with someone like Frank who would sneer and criticize at every opportunity given.
“Do you shave your chest, by the way?” he asked, the second the shop was empty. Gerard's head snapped up from the tattoo he was tracing and he raised his eyebrows, trying not to let Frank irritate him too much. It was like the idiots he'd dealt with back at school; the more of a reaction they got, the more they enjoyed it, the more likely they were to do it again.
“Yes.” he replied, before cursing himself internally. He hadn't meant to say that, he'd meant to tell Frank it was none of his business...stupid word vomit.
Frank giggled, playing with his fingers, a deep expression on his face. “Why? You're so gay.” he giggled still, knowing how much it would wind Gerard up.
“C-can you just stop?” he burst out, warning sirens ringing in his mind. Once he'd started, he knew it would be difficult for him to stop... “you're driving me crazy, I hate it. I don't find you attractive, okay? What you...what you did to me yesterday, it wasn't okay, just leaving me standing there like that. I don't-”
“Why?” Frank interrupted, speaking quickly. “Would you rather I finished the job? Screwed you there and then?”
Gerard shook his head, exasperated. “No, but you'd made me hard, you could at least have helped me out a bit...” he trailed off, realising he was going around in circles. He'd just told Frank that he didn't find him attractive, and then basically said he wished that he'd made him come.
“You're fighting a losing battle,” Frank smirked. “Oh, Gee, you so find me attractive, it's almost painful to watch.” he stood up and strutted over to the door, holding it open for a group of ignorant looking teenage girls, but their presence didn't stop him. “Darling, give it up, stop being so self-important and let yourself go. You can't get enough of me.” he drawled, as the girls looked around, suddenly apprehensive. “Oh, just ignore me, I'll be with you in a minute.” Frank grinned at them and they started to giggle again, moving in a pack towards the seating area. Frank pulled Gerard along by the wrist into the back room and shoved his hand into his jacket pocket; there was a clatter as he pulled it out, and its contents fell to the floor.
Cigarettes, a key, a lighter and a condom.
A what?
“Frank, why do you have a condom?” Gerard inquired. “In your work jacket?”
“I, um.” Frank paused, not knowing what to say; for once, he was the clueless one in the conversation. “Just in case?” he smirked. Gerard rolled his eyes awkwardly and averted his attention back to the situation.
“And er, why are we in here again? When there are customers?”
“Here,” Frank pulled open the cigarette packet and shoved one into Gerard's hand, “go smoke, you need it, you're so fucking tense.”
“No,” Gerard put it down on the table, shaking his head almost angrily. “I tried to break that habit, it was killing me, and you...don' t just think you can take all that away from me. Once, twice was enough. Not anymor-”
Suddenly he was being pushed against the wall and Frank was kissing him; before he'd even had a second to figure out what was happening, a hand was snaking down his stomach silently. He pushed Frank off, eyes wide.
“What the fuck?” he said, head spinning slightly.
“Don't ask, just...let me,” Frank leant forward again, one hand on Gerard's waist and the other fidgeting around the waistband of his jeans.
“No!” Gerard said, flushing a deep shade of red and feeling himself getting flustered. “Stop it! You can't do this to me, not now.” Frank didn't listen and he kissed him again; Gerard didn't kiss back this time, and he pushed Frank off completely. “Stop, get off me, you creep-” he was frowning frustratedly as he headed back into the shop by way of escape, smiling at the now slightly scared looking girls and asking them what they were after. He even felt awkward, almost victimized talking to them – and as Frank came out of the back room, refusing to make eye contact with him, let alone talk to him, Gerard suddenly felt like the loneliest person on Earth.

-

The days passed slowly, all routinely the same: Gerard would go to work, Frank would be there, they would ignore eachother, it would be hell. Gerard would go home, his fiancée would be there acting like nothing was wrong, making ridiculously boring small talk. On Wednesday night Gerard's need for something sexual completely overrode him and she gave him the world's most delicate blowjob; his moans were more like half-hearted whimpers, and when he came, there was hardly anything. She spat his load back out and smiled patronizingly, pulling up his trousers and then falling asleep in silence. She didn't ask for more, and he sure as hell didn't want it – with her, at least.
Thursday afternoon at the tattoo parlour, Tommo had just left, his excuse that day being 'my dog is home alone.' Frank had been right about him – he was pretty fucking useless, but he got most of the money. How was that in any way fair?
Gerard was sweeping the floor as was bluntly instructed by the straight faced Frank. He'd been less alive than Gerard had ever seen him; none of the cruel jokes, the harsh sniggers, and the kind of maybe-slightly-attractive smirk that usually played on his lips did not appear, but as Gerard stood there pushing back and forth with the cheap broom, Frank's face broke into a slightly sardonic grin. To Gerard's relief he remained silent; well, he swore to himself that it was to his relief, but life without the irritating presence of Frank was getting really, really boring. It wasn't just boring, though: he felt regretful and irritated and empty. Surely that wasn't just because of Frank, though?
The door burst open and a man of about Frank's age stepped in, a wild smile on his face. The second he laid eyes upon Frank he lit up; leaping towards him, he planted a big, happy kiss on Frank's cheek and wrapped his arms around him, grinning at Gerard.
“Frank! Finally! It's been...days!” he smiled.
“Yeah, too long,” Frank grinned back. “I've got about five minutes until we have to close but the boss' already visited, I guess I could make it early, for you?” he smirked, and the crazy looking black-haired man didn't let go of him. He didn't let go either.
“Oh, yes please, Frankie baby.” he finally slipped away and Frank turned to Gerard, a spiteful look on his face. “I'm leaving early with Bert, because we have things to do, so you can lock up.” he ran into the back and pulled on his coat, deliberately patting the pocket which Gerard knew contained the condom. The fleeting eye contact they exchanged as Frank left the shop was almost unreadable, yet both of them identified one of the same thing: hurt.
Gerard switched off the lights in silence, pulled his jacket on and saw the lone cigarette from Monday still waiting for him, taunting him on the side. He shuddered slightly and picked it up; he didn't even have a lighter, but fuck, he wanted that thing badly. Frank had just left the shop with some other guy, apparently called Bert, apparently with the intention of having sex with him – the sick, worrying feeling that formed in Gerard's stomach was extremely unwelcome and Gerard told himself, over and over, that he didn't give a shit.
But he really, really did, and the disappointment he felt of himself was almost impossible to contain. He headed around the corner and to his car; why should he feel disappointment? He hadn't done anything, Frank was the asshole who had kissed him – what, twice – and then had ignored him for three days straight and then left with some other guy. Anger welled up inside Gerard, building up in his eyes and then leaking, tears dripping down his solemn face. There is so much I don't understand.
He felt overcome with resent and hatred toward Frank, yet overcome with desire, and he couldn't make up his mind; neither feeling was stronger, yet the second could cause more damage. If he let Frank near him – anywhere near him, especially his heart – it could hurt a lot more than carrying on with the bitterness and the lies and the stolen kisses, the refused kisses. Taking the safe route, that's what Gerard was doing – playing the coward.

-

“Honey, honey, you need to get up.” rough hands tapped Gerard's cheek carefully as he blinked in the morning light, body stiff and heavy from his worries. “I have to drive you to work in about fifteen minutes.”
Clothes, hygiene, appearance, food – and Gerard was done, ready to leave the house for the morning. It had been a week since the 'incident' and life with his fiancée had pretty much gone back to normal. In her eyes, at least; in Gerard's, it was more mundane and devoid of emotion than ever. All he could think about was Frank; even if it was bad things, like his cruel humour and his ability to make fun of anything. But then there was his surprising kindness when he'd been kissing Gerard the second time, the fact that he was a vegetarian because he believed that animal cruelty was wrong, the hurt that Gerard had seen in his eyes when he'd left with Bert. Why was that?
...when he'd left with Bert.
That day he was going to face a quite literally fucked Frank Iero, fucked by somebody else – to his intense horror, that thought filled him with so much jealousy that he couldn't contain it. He blurted out what had happened to his girlfriend when they were in the car, driving in the grey morning.
“...and he just left me to go fuc- I mean, get with some oth- some random guy and I had to lock up the shop, that's not my duty!” he frowned, trying to make it seem work related.
“Right, Gerard, that's great.” she said, not really listening. “Can't you um, tell the manager? I knew this Frank guy was trouble.”
“I've told you, the manager's useless, Frank said he-” he stopped himself as she rolled her eyes, and he detected a deeper meaning in her sigh.
“Sorry.” he sighed too and spent the next few minutes in silence before arriving at the tattoo parlour and walking inside glumly.
“Last day of work!” Frank smiled, to Gerard's complete surprise. “And we get to leave early! Coffees?” he said, grinning.
“Um, but,” Gerard felt incredibly awkward and that horrible, 'too hot' feeling crept over him. “You're not talking to me.” he said.
“Yes I am. I am now.” Frank nodded and rolled his eyes, as if it was as easy as that.
“And what if I'm not talking to you now?” Gerard tested, narrowing his eyes.
“Well obviously you are, idiot.”
“Well yeah, but...”
It definitely wasn't what Gerard had expected, but he wasn't complaining.
“I expect you're wondering who I left with yesterday.” Frank stated, self-importantly.
“Um, sort of.” he replied, not looking Frank in the eye.
“Ah, well,” he pulled something out of his pocket – the condom, still unopened. Gerard screwed up his eyes. “Ew,” he said, trying to make the situation lighter; masking his resentment; “I really don't want to know about you and some guy's unprotected sex expeditions.”
Frank snorted. “No, silly, we didn't have sex. We didn't fuck.” He shoved it back in his pocket, looking expectantly at Gerard. “I just knew it would wind you up.”
There was a silence. “You...you fucking idiot!” Gerard exclaimed. He was quite honestly disgusted by Frank's behaviour. “How do you even manage to be that bitchy and still have any friends?” he inquired, genuinely curious.
“Now now, no need to be mean.”
“No need to be- ugh,” Gerard shrugged hopelessly, knowing that he'd give in to Frank's offer of coffee that afternoon, full of freeing relief that Frank hadn't made love to Bert. The fact that Frank had done it just to wind him up, to make him jealous, was such an idiotic and immature thing to do; yet it was something Gerard himself would be fine with pulling off if he wanted to badly.
Which showed, to him, that Frank wanted to badly.
And that really, Frank wanted him badly.
Gerard ran into the back to dump his jacket down and punched the air in relief. He should be angry and pissed off and still reeling from despair at that kiss he'd been forced into, part of him was shouting at him in the corner of his mind...but it was a very insignificant corner, and he shut it away before it ruined his suddenly almost perfect morning.

So it's four in the morning where I am and I've stayed up since like two to write this because I knew I wouldn't get around to it until Friday otherwise, aah! And as I'm so ridiculously tired I'll probably read it tomorrow and think it's terrible. But anyways I'm sorry if it is, I need some filler-y stuff so that it doesn't seem to be happening too fast, you know? >< it too me so many attempts to get this chapter going properly, aah. I know Bert is traditionally Gee's but hey, this isn't so traditional ;P and thankyou to everyone who rates and reviews each time, I forever and ever and ever and ever love you for it! xoxoxo