FicWad

Walking around the now empty house, I didn't want to believe he was gone. My thoughts echoed around the empty rooms. I hadn't changed my clothes in a long time. I must have stank like a pit or trash... but there was no one there to clean up for. I woke up this morning and went to the wardrobe. I took out a new t-shirt. In the process, I knocked some things around. I looked at the mess at my feet and froze. I saw one of Mikey's old shirts on the floor. It was that stupid mickey mouse one he always wore when we went to Disney land. After that fateful tour, we lived three more years together. We made the most of life together. We got married in vegas. That was the most amazing day of my life. I still have the wedding band. I never take it off. I have his in the box he gave it to me all those years ago on my bedside dresser. I pulled on the shirt and walked to the kitchen. The answering machine was full of messages again. I pressed erase all. I didn't care if anyone wanted to check up on me. They could all just leave me alone to be with Mikey. I walked to the kitchen and switched on the TV. The news was on. I never watched the news, but I liked having the noise in the background - it made me feel like I wasn't alone. Which of course, I was. I heard the name Mikey and looked up at the screen. I saw a picture of TFF before we broke up because of Mikey's death. Of course. It was our two year anniversary today. I felt my eyes sting.
'And we will be having a tribute to The Face of Failure today on Channel 4.' I heard the announcer say. Fuck. I don't want to go on anymore. I went to the bathroom and got out some pain pills. I took three. Then I took three more. Then a handful. I walked to the kitchen and got the biggest knife in the house out. I sliced 'mikey' into my wrist then four large gashes on my arm and fell to my knees.

'I don't want to go on if I don't have you' I sang to myself.