FicWad

‘’Maybe it’s best if you don’t talk with Mikey until we come back.’’ Lauren suggested as she washed the bowls and pan she had used to cook the soup. Dahlia had gone upstairs to play with her toys and watch cartoons, leaving the adults to talk about ‘grown-up things’.
‘’We?’’ Gerard asked,
‘’Yes – I’m going with you, Gerard.’’ Lauren nodded, turning away from the washing-up bowl, drying her bubble-covered hands. ‘’I want to see them die,’’ she sighed, with a smile on her lips.
‘‘That’s fair enough, I guess…’’ Gerard lit a cigarette, waiting for Lauren to scold him for smoking in the kitchen – but she didn’t. She even picked up an ashtray from under the counter, and placed it in front of them.
‘’Yeah, and I don’t want Mikey to know – he’s up to his ears in work right now. I don’t want him with even more things to dwell on,’’ She plucked the cigarette from him lips, popping it in-between her lips, sitting on a stool and taking a deep drag, then letting the smoke drift from her parted lips.
‘’Why did you get married?’’ Gerard watched the smoke, transfixed,
‘’Because I was in love… I always told myself I wouldn’t get married when I was young – but I guess I hit twenty and I just…you know… wanted to feel something more…’’ she handed him the cigarette, looking around the kitchen wearily, ‘’but he’s working more and more lately…I want Dahlia to have her father there for her. I wouldn’t care if Mikey took less shifts – these fancy fixtures and this expensive house… it doesn’t mean shit to me if he can’t be there for her.’’ Lauren shook her head, ‘’it’s not fair on anyone,’’.
‘’Where your parents there for you?’’ Gerard asked,
‘’Not emotionally, not physically – when they were home, they were either abusing me, or ignoring me.’’ Lauren frowned, her multi-coloured eyes dulling as her posture fell. She was right back to being the scared teenager, living with her family and being scared – she was forced to withdraw inside herself.
‘’If I kill them, you’ll feel like you’ve beaten them. Like I felt when I beat my monster,’’,
‘’Yes, I want them to be eradicated. I don’t care about my siblings, they want nothing to do with me now – I just want my parents dead in front of me.’’ Her eyes locked with his, and she slid off of her stool, standing up. ‘’It’s time for you to leave, Gerard, get ready, and I want you to come back tomorrow at 3pm. I’ll be ready by then,’’ she smiled softly, ‘’I really appreciate you helping me,’’. Gerard nodded, standing and turning to leave,
‘’I’ll see you tomorrow,’’ he walked out of the back doors, with Lauren watching, picking up the ash tray and dropping its contents into the trash. She wandered up the stairs afterwards, into Dahlia’s bedroom.

Lauren dropped to sit beside her daughter as she clutched a stuffed unicorn, watching a cartoon video with wide hazel eyes. ‘’Dali, would you be sad if I had to leave for a few days?’’ she asked, Dahlia glanced from the video to Lauren with a slight frown; a suspicious frown.
‘’Yeah...’’ Dahlia answered.
‘’Because I have to leave tomorrow, Dali. I have to go and take care of something with Uncle Gerard.’’,
‘’Take care of what?’’,
‘’Well… a long time ago, before you were born. I helped to slay on of Uncle Gerard’s monsters – like one of your fairytales. And now, I need him to help me to slay two monsters for me.’’,
‘’Monsters?’’ Dahlia looked afraid for a few moments,
‘’Monsters who hurt mommy when she was younger. I have to make sure that they won’t come and hurt you, Dali. Because I would never let anyone hurt you…’’ Lauren bit her lip, thinking of her own confusion when she was younger – wondering why she was being hurt, why her family didn’t love her like other children’s families. Dahlia would never know that feeling; Lauren would make sure of it.

‘’Mom? Mom where are you?’’ Lauren wandered into her home, her red jumper was a beacon in the absence of light in the living room. Her mother was sat in front of the television, watching daytime TV absently. Her blue-grey eyes were transfixed the bright coloured flesh of the screen.
‘’Lauren – come here.’’ Her mother’s voice was calm – it made Lauren cringe because she knew that whenever her mother’s voice was calm – she was sure to grow angry at something. Some small, mundane detail that Lauren could never control.
‘’Yes, mom?’’ Lauren stood in front of her mother, looking down to the grey material of her skirt. A few plasters covered her right knee – she had a knack for falling over in the playground when playing with her few friends.
‘’What are these?’’ her mother looked down at her knee,
‘’I fell and cut my knee.’’ Lauren tried to regulate her breathing, trying to hold back her tears of fear.
‘’Silly girl – can’t you stay upright? Can’t you ever stop falling over?’’ her mother stood up, and pushed Lauren to the cold, hard wooden floorboards of the living room.
‘’Yes I can stay up!’’ Lauren burst into tears, trying to scrabble to her feet once again.
‘’You couldn’t just now! You’re a little liar! You’re a worthless waste of space!’’ her mother hit her again, laughing as Lauren cried harder, her body stilling as she realized that she had nowhere to go. Nowhere to run from the monster who was supposed to protect her and love her – not cause her pain, suffering and fear. ‘’Waste! Waste of space! That’s all you’ll ever be!’’ he mother jibed, kicking her harder, just before she reached down and tugged at Lauren’s hair – bringing her cheek up from the cold hard floorboards.’’ I’ll never let you go.’’ Her mother spat, then hit her head against the floorboards, walking out of the room.
Lauren pulled herself up like a wounded animal, still sobbing as she looked around the living room helplessly.
She promised herself that she would never hurt anyone like her parents had hurt her.

‘’Mommy, you should go and kill the monster,’’ Dahlia murmured, she’d wrapped her arms around Lauren as she’d been lost in remembrance, Lauren resurfaced, feeling the cold sting of tears against her cheeks. She held her daughter closer,
‘’I'd do anything to protect you, Dahlia. I'll never let anyone hurt you. ’’ She assured.