Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > 179 Ways To Annoy Someone
#28- ask people what gender they are
1 reviewIt was just an ordinary day on the My Chem tour bus...
5Funny
Just so you all know, I'm not doing 179 stories... I'm only doing some, the ones on the list that gave me ideas. Also, they won't be in order probably.
And the list is here:http://patorjk.com/misc/chainletters/179waystoannoypeople.htm
{A/N (Sept.14): If this gets one more Funny rating, I'll be so happy. Please? Someone? Anyone?]
#28- ASK PEOPLE WHAT GENDER THEY ARE.
It was just an ordinary day on the My Chemical Romance tour bus. Mikey was over in the corner reading, Ray was playing video games and Gerard and Frank were sprawled on the couch together. Everything was perfectly normal.
Then suddenly, Frank cocked his head. He stared questioningly off into the distance for a minute. Gerard stared at him, wondering what he was thinking about. It looked like he was having an epiphany.
After a minute, Frank's gaze snapped to Gerard, his forehead still creased in a ponderous way. He slowly opened his mouth to speak. Gerard waited with bated breath, wondering what sort of revelation was going to fall from Frank's lips.
Finally, Frank spoke.
"Gerard, what gender are you?"
Mikey and Ray both stopped what they were doing and looked over. This was a conversation they both wanted to hear.
Gerard sputtered indignantly, his eyes wide. "I have a penis, Frank! You of all people should be aware of that!"
"I'm very aware of that, darling," said Frank evenly. "You're of the male sex, I know that. However, that doesn't nescessarily make you of the male gender."
Right. Gender identity, thought Gerard.
"Well... well... why do you even ask?" he stammered defensively.
Frank raised his eyebrows with a 'Duh!' sort of look on his face. "Well, Gee, darling, you wear makeup all the damn time, along with women's pants, you love to tell interviewers about that one time you went to art school in drag, oh, and speaking of being in drag... does "Don't I look pretty walking down the street in the best damn dress I own" sound familiar at all?"
Gerard sat there, gobsmacked and red in the face.
"Oh, and you love to prance around onstage wearing pink feather boas," Frank added, almost as an afterthought.
"I... well... I just... you wear makeup too! And women's pants just fit better! And... And I... I like to prance, okay?! And boas are cool!" he protested, his voice getting more high-pitched with each word, so that by the end of the sentence he was practically squeaking.
Ray and Mikey both burst out laughing. Frank's mouth twitched for a minute and then he joined in.
"I'm fucking with you, Gee," he said, smirking.
Gerard's jaw dropped and Ray and Mikey laughed harder. He scowled at them and they immediately shut up and went back to their game.He turned his scowl on Frank, who just kept smirking. He leaned forwards, his mouth almost touching Gerard's ear.
"You're sexy when you're annoyed," he said in his "seductive" voice.
Gerard pouted. "You're so mean to me, Frank!"
'I'm sorry, love," he whispered, still close to his ear. "Forgive me?"
And Gerard couldn't help but say "Of course" because he always forgives Frank when he calls him "love."
He's girly like that.
And the list is here:http://patorjk.com/misc/chainletters/179waystoannoypeople.htm
{A/N (Sept.14): If this gets one more Funny rating, I'll be so happy. Please? Someone? Anyone?]
#28- ASK PEOPLE WHAT GENDER THEY ARE.
It was just an ordinary day on the My Chemical Romance tour bus. Mikey was over in the corner reading, Ray was playing video games and Gerard and Frank were sprawled on the couch together. Everything was perfectly normal.
Then suddenly, Frank cocked his head. He stared questioningly off into the distance for a minute. Gerard stared at him, wondering what he was thinking about. It looked like he was having an epiphany.
After a minute, Frank's gaze snapped to Gerard, his forehead still creased in a ponderous way. He slowly opened his mouth to speak. Gerard waited with bated breath, wondering what sort of revelation was going to fall from Frank's lips.
Finally, Frank spoke.
"Gerard, what gender are you?"
Mikey and Ray both stopped what they were doing and looked over. This was a conversation they both wanted to hear.
Gerard sputtered indignantly, his eyes wide. "I have a penis, Frank! You of all people should be aware of that!"
"I'm very aware of that, darling," said Frank evenly. "You're of the male sex, I know that. However, that doesn't nescessarily make you of the male gender."
Right. Gender identity, thought Gerard.
"Well... well... why do you even ask?" he stammered defensively.
Frank raised his eyebrows with a 'Duh!' sort of look on his face. "Well, Gee, darling, you wear makeup all the damn time, along with women's pants, you love to tell interviewers about that one time you went to art school in drag, oh, and speaking of being in drag... does "Don't I look pretty walking down the street in the best damn dress I own" sound familiar at all?"
Gerard sat there, gobsmacked and red in the face.
"Oh, and you love to prance around onstage wearing pink feather boas," Frank added, almost as an afterthought.
"I... well... I just... you wear makeup too! And women's pants just fit better! And... And I... I like to prance, okay?! And boas are cool!" he protested, his voice getting more high-pitched with each word, so that by the end of the sentence he was practically squeaking.
Ray and Mikey both burst out laughing. Frank's mouth twitched for a minute and then he joined in.
"I'm fucking with you, Gee," he said, smirking.
Gerard's jaw dropped and Ray and Mikey laughed harder. He scowled at them and they immediately shut up and went back to their game.He turned his scowl on Frank, who just kept smirking. He leaned forwards, his mouth almost touching Gerard's ear.
"You're sexy when you're annoyed," he said in his "seductive" voice.
Gerard pouted. "You're so mean to me, Frank!"
'I'm sorry, love," he whispered, still close to his ear. "Forgive me?"
And Gerard couldn't help but say "Of course" because he always forgives Frank when he calls him "love."
He's girly like that.
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