FicWad

When I finally arrive home everyone is waiting in the kitchen. Donna and my mother are sitting at the small wooden table while Mikey and Gerard take up what little counter space we do have with their butts. Donna looks relieved, my mother looks mad, and my cousins wearing the same bored expression.

“Hey, how’s it going?” I say standing in the doorway, trying to look innocent.

“So you spent the night at Frank’s again?” Donna replies.

I nod, “Yes.”

“When did you head over there?” questions my mother, getting up from her chair.

“About ten.”

“Why didn’t you ask?" this is my mother again. I still don’t understand why she thinks it’s bad that I spend the night at Frank’s.

“You were already asleep.”

As my mother goes to say more Donna intervenes, “It’s alright Eve.”

Normally my mother and I argue about my sleep over’s but anymore Aunt Donna steps in, keeping the house peaceful.

“We’d both appreciate it if you would at least leave us a note next time,” Aunt Donna says before walking out of the room. She knows the whole note thing will never happen.

“Why weren’t you home by lunch time, Amber?” my mother demands. I should have known this was coming.

“I went to Liz’s house to tie die t-shirts. I told you that yesterday,” I respond. “I wasn’t doing anything wrong. For once will you get off my case? Try being more like Aunt Donna."

“I swear to God, if you get pregnant…” Mikey, Gerard and I all start laughing.

My mother pauses, turning to look at my older cousins, “Why is that funny?”

“You don’t really think Frank’s going to impregnate me, do you?” I ask, raising an eyebrow at her.

“They don’t have that kind of relationship, Aunt Eve. Trust me,” Mikey says.

“Well, things could change,” my mother goes on, “In more cases than not best friends become lovers.”

“Unlikely,” Mikey retorts as Gerard and my mother leave the kitchen

“What’s that supposed to mean, asshole?” I ask, wiping around to face him.

“Don’t call me an asshole.”

“I just did. Asshole.”

“Bitch.”

“Fuck wad.”

“Slut.”

I punch Mikey in his arm and he punches me back. By this time we have managed to move to the living room so when I tackle my cousin to the ground it doesn’t hurt too badly. This kind of wrestling around is different from when I wrestle with Frank. Mikey and I go at it for real, and Mikey would never, ever kiss me in the heat of the moment.

After about ten minutes of fighting with Mikey I head up to my room just a little eager to talk to Frank. Sure I know that our kiss meant nothing and I really am over it. I’ll hide my feeling and continue on being his friend…it is so much better than loosing him forever over something so silly.

The second I open my door I can tell someone has been there, my drawing book has been moved. The only person who would touch my drawings are….

“Gerard!” I holler still standing in my doorway. I can’t believe he was in here. I’m going to kill him. “Gerard Arthur Way get your ass up the stairs!”

I can hear feet pounding on the steps and then my dark haired cousin is standing in front of me, his eyes wide as if he’s confused to what is going on. I know damn well he isn’t as innocent as he looks. Gerard is the only one who would mess with my drawings. Obviously he meant no harm by it but I’d never pass up a chance to make him just a little nervous.

“Were you in my room today” I demand.

Gerard switches his weight from one foot to the other then back again. Finding the carpet extremely entertaining he refuses to make eye contact. There is no way Gerard is lying to me…the guilt is written all over his pale face. It’s all I can do to keep from laughing.

“Yeah, I asked Frank if you were still with him,” Gee answers, “and then I might have looked at your drawings. They’re really good Amber.”

“Thank you, Gerard, you can go,” I say wondering what his reaction will be.

His eyes grow wide, a looks of pure confusion plastered on his face, “What, you’re not mad or upset or...or.... You’re not gonna beat me up?”

“Unless you want me to, I hadn’t planned on it,” I respond before pushing him out of my small room and shutting the door on his face.

Diving onto my bed, I manage to grab my walkie talkie but end up hitting my head against the poster covered wall. This happens often and I really should have learned my lesson by now but alas I have not. Oh well, this doesn’t hurt nearly as bad as the bruise I’ve managed to cover up with makeup at Liz’s house.

That’s really the reason I went over there. I don’t keep make up at Frank’s house ‘cause I’ve never seen the point. But, yesterday, I realized the bruises on my arm and jaw appeared much too dark to not be noticed. Thank God Liz never asks too many questions. Just the normal, ‘was he drunk’ and ‘did he try and have sex with you,’ the answer to these always being yes. After that nothing else is said and we both begin the task of covering up the marks Garry always seems to be leaving on me.

Today just happened to be the same day Liz and I decided to die shirts for the upcoming start of school festival. The both of us are heading it this year and each new freshman gets a school colored tie die shirt. I’m actually kinda surprised mom forgot. She was so proud when we'd found out I'd made president for the student class board.

“Frank,” I say into the walkie hoping he isn’t downstairs eating dinner. “Frank.”

A few seconds later I hear noise on the other end, “Hey Amber, where were you? Gerard called over.”

“I was at Liz’s I had a situation I had to take care of,” I respond.

Frank is quiet for a few minutes, “What kind of situation?”

He’d seen me last night. The bruises were evident then. How could he not understand what I am talking about? Sometimes Frank is clueless.

“The whole Garry thing…well you saw how I looked,” I answer hoping I wouldn’t have to say it out loud incase Gerard or Mikey or Aunt Donna or my mom happened to be listening through the door.

Certain things I keep from my family for their own safety. Garry hitting me is one of them. It’d break their hearts to know I was getting hurt on occasion. I just can’t do that to them. I take my beatings silently and attempt to cover things up best I can. Although it doesn’t happen often I have to lie about where I acquired a certain bruise from…lying hurts the worst.

“I understand. Amber you could do so much better than him. You don’t deserve to be beat up on all the time for things you don’t do,” Frank says and I can tell he’s saddened by the fact I just take what Garry dishes out.

“You don’t get it. I fight back with him. If I kept my mouth shut I wouldn’t have the problem I do.”

“That can’t be true.”

“It is. Oh, Garry said that the fair is our time but around ten thirty you can meet us at the ferris wheel and the four of us can ride it together. Don't forget its on the Thrusday of the first week of school.”

“Alright I won't forget. Amber…please don’t let him get drunk.”

“You know I don’t have any control over that.”

For a long time Frank doesn’t say anything. I just listen to him breath, comforted by the fact he is still there. Frank gave me the walkie talkie for Christmas one year after we both decided we liked hearing each others voices before we went to bed and it wasn’t worth sneaking out every night just for a few minutes. Now, as long as both of us are in our rooms we can talk over the walkie talkies. Every time I see the green, military grade walkie I take comfort in the fact that Frank is just a button push away.

“Amber…?”

“Yes Frank?”

“Sleep well.”

“You too Frank” I answer, glancing at the clock. It’s eleven o’clock at night. I’d missed dinner by about four hours. Oh well, I wasn’t very hungry to begin with.

From my window I can see Frank get up and leave his bedroom, probably heading to the bathroom. Understanding our conversation is over, I crawl under the covers; still dressed in last night pajama pants and shut my eyes. Tomorrow is only Saturday…three more days still school starts. I take comfort in this fact.

Note: I don't want to sound like I'm begging fron reviews but I would kinda like to know what you guys think. Does it suck, is it good, should I even go on with it? You guys have to let me know.