Categories > TV > CSI: Miami > Letting Go
author's notes: This was written at the request of many fans who said they would like to see a sequel and also because i wanted to treat the bois real good for once ;) Thanks to my favourite beta Raimm for helping me out ^_^
***
Eric kept one eye on his rear-view mirror the whole drive back to his apartment, worried that Ryan would succumb to second thoughts and flee. Eric himself was wondering what had possessed him to invite Ryan in; hitting the gay clubs and the occasional make-out in a secluded booth was one thing but it had been years since Eric had brought anyone home with him. Yet it felt right and Eric still trusted his instincts when it came to people. But to his relief, Ryan's black SUV dutifully followed him the whole way, though at a distance too far for Eric to see Ryan's expression.
Ryan parked neatly beside Eric's own SUV in the underground parking lot just as Eric was shutting the driver-side door and he couldn't help but smile at Ryan as the younger CSI nervously climbed out and took a look around. Gesturing grandly, Eric indicated where the elevator was located and let Ryan take the lead into the metal container when it arrived with a muffled "ding!" at their floor.
Ryan seemed content to stare at the floor, so Eric gave him a little space and they silently rose towards his apartment level. Whatever Ryan was thinking, Eric wanted to let him sort it out before he made his move...again. He looked over at Ryan, taking in his dark brown hair that was just starting to get shaggy, his clear eyes focused on the spot where the elevator walls and floor met with the intensity of a cat watching a mousehole. Another smile tugged at the corner of Eric's mouth and just at that moment Ryan seemed to realize he was being watched and looked up, meeting Eric's gaze and taking in his smile. Eric could literally see the gears in his head still running a mile a minute, then Ryan tentatively smiled back and shifted his weight in Eric's direction just as the elevator chugged to a stop. Impulsively, Eric grabbed Ryan's hand and practically dragged him through Eric's front door after the bare minimum of key jiggling.
"Welcome to my humble abode." Eric said and let go of Ryan's hand to take off his shoes. Gesturing for Ryan to wait a minute, Eric quickly snuck into his kitchen and made sure it wasn't a disaster area with a fast lookover. From the heated start they shared a hour ago, Eric found it funny that he was more concerned with making sure he hadn't left a sink full of dirty dishes in the kitchen than ripping Ryan's clothes off. He just didn't want to look like a slob, Eric told himself, and he knew it would bug Ryan to see such a mess, nothing special about not wanting that to happen. Satisfied that his place wouldn't embarress him, Eric walked back towards the front door to find only Ryan's shoes waiting for him, carefully tucked to the side.
To Eric's surprise, he found Ryan standing by his mantel, looking at the assortment of framed photos Eric had propped up on the mantel above the fake fireplace. Ryan was giving the pictures more than a cursory, polite glance; his expression was much more serious than Eric would have expected.
"Is this your family?" Ryan asked, his voice as strange as his expression. If Eric was better at reading Ryan, he might have thought Ryan sounded wistful.
"Yeah, it is." Eric replied, grinning at the photo Ryan was pointing at, of his family having a barbeque on the beach two years ago. He had no idea what had possessed him to buy those bright blue swimming trunks.
"Sisters, huh?" Ryan commented, sounding less serious and more amused. Eric chuckled and nodded a little sheepishly.
"Yup, they like to think they have me henpecked but I'm not as wrapped around their little fingers as they think I am. But you know how it is." Eric clapped Ryan on the back with a smile that invited him to share the joke. Ryan smiled back, yet it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Sure." He replied quietly. Before Eric could wonder about Ryan's reaction, the younger CSI had moved past the mantel and finished his exploration of Eric's living room. The way Ryan moved looked suspiciously similar to the way they investigated crime scenes and the fact that Ryan seemed to do it unconsciously was ..well.. kinda cute. Eric grinned again and let himself settle onto his favourite piece of furniture, his pride and joy: a big black leather couch, slightly over-stuffed and smooth as a dream.
"Does my place pass muster?" Eric teased. Ryan looked over at him in surprise, then looked back at the path he had taken around the room and blushed slightly. Eric patted the space beside him on the couch in a deceivingly-innocent gesture and Ryan smiled as he skirted around the coffee table towards him. But before the younger man could plant himself on the soft leather, Eric reached out to snag Ryan's wrist and smoothly pulled Ryan into his lap with barely a bounce. Ryan looked shocked for a long moment; his eyebrows high and green eyes wide. He sat unmoving for so long, looking so unsure of what to do, that Eric couldn't resist chuckling at his expression. Ryan jumped a little at the sound, then slowly relaxed, tentatively putting one hand on Eric's knee and the other in his own lap.
"Are you always this forward?" Ryan asked, bringing only one of his eyebrows back down.
"I like to call it 'being efficient'." Eric replied without losing his grin. Ryan's mouth flattened out into the peculiar unsmiling expression he got whenever he was deeply amused but was trying to not show it, his lips pressed together as if to prevent laughter from escaping. Eric thought it was so quintessential "Ryan Wolfe" that it delighted him to no end and his chuckles became full-fledged laughter. Ryan continued to look at him like he was crazy while Eric leaned his head against the back of the couch and laughed.
"Someone's in a good mood." Ryan remarked, smiling. Eric didn't reply but they both knew that it was the rush of relief that buoyed them, the sense of things finally going right between them. Having Ryan in his lap willingly, with no sense that he intended to move anytime soon, was enough in itself to make Eric feel giddy and confident, like he normally felt with all his conquests. But this wasn't just another one night stand, this was different. It didn't even have anything to do with sex. He needed to prove to Ryan that he could trust himself and what he wanted, and that he could trust Eric. Tonight was all about teaching Ryan how to let go.
"I'm not bothering you with my...efficiency, am I?" Eric asked, calming down for a moment, abruptly feeling a little bit guilty about not asking permission to just yank Ryan down. Ryan just gave him another "A few screws loose, Delko?" look and laughed, white teeth flashing.
"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" Ryan replied, quirking an eyebrow at Eric. The Cuban took that as a good sign and maneuvered one of Ryan's knees to the other side of his lap so that Ryan was facing Eric, which Ryan allowed good-naturedly with some settling back a bit towards Eric's knees, like he was trying to keep his weight off of Eric. It was very considerate of Ryan but comfort was not really what Eric was after.
"Hey, you wouldn't be here if I didn't want you to be here." Eric retorted, grinning. Sharp green eyes twinkled at him as Ryan took in his confident declaration.
"Is this the famous Delko charm I'm seeing, that gets you so many ladies?" Ryan smirked.
"Men too, thank you very much." Eric pointed out, sensing that Ryan was still struggling to repaint his mental picture of his coworker who did have a reputation as purely a ladies'-man. "The rumours are true, you know; we Cubans are unrivaled in our pursuit of passion in all its shapes and forms."
"You sound like a brochure." Ryan made a small face, mock-grimacing.
"What's it gonna to take to convince you I'm serious?" Eric teased, his hands already creeping their way slowly past Ryan's knees and advancing northward. Ryan's breathing hitched and his mouth fell open slightly.
"I-I don't know." He sounded slightly out of breath, stuttering a little as Eric distracted him from thinking properly. Eric's mouth quirked into that lazy grin, now tinged with lust, as he leisurely smoothed his palms around Ryan's slim hips. Once past the seam of Ryan's jeans, Eric switched from slow to quick and had his hands curved around Ryan's backside before the younger CSI could react and Eric was rewarded with a gasp from Ryan that left his mouth properly wide and temptingly wet. Eric gave into the temptation and pulled Ryan forward to join their lips together in a nice, long scorching kiss. Ryan's slender lips, soft with just the right hint of pouty, gave way beneath Eric's; their tongues tentatively meeting and twisting. While they kissed, Eric gave Ryan's backside a firm squeeze and his second reward was the sound of a shaky moan as Ryan sloppily broke their kiss and closed his eyes.
But Eric could still see Ryan holding back; his hands on either side of Eric on the couch shivered from the tension in Ryan's lean frame that spoke of repressed desire. Eric didn't know if it was Ryan's past that haunted him or merely inner demons he couldn't silence, but still Eric removed one of his hands from Ryan's waist to smooth away the crease in Ryan's brow with a gentle thumbtip. At his touch, Ryan's eyes opened again and Eric lost himself in the labyrinth of grey and green contracting wider as Ryan's pupil's shrank in the sudden light.
***
Eric kept one eye on his rear-view mirror the whole drive back to his apartment, worried that Ryan would succumb to second thoughts and flee. Eric himself was wondering what had possessed him to invite Ryan in; hitting the gay clubs and the occasional make-out in a secluded booth was one thing but it had been years since Eric had brought anyone home with him. Yet it felt right and Eric still trusted his instincts when it came to people. But to his relief, Ryan's black SUV dutifully followed him the whole way, though at a distance too far for Eric to see Ryan's expression.
Ryan parked neatly beside Eric's own SUV in the underground parking lot just as Eric was shutting the driver-side door and he couldn't help but smile at Ryan as the younger CSI nervously climbed out and took a look around. Gesturing grandly, Eric indicated where the elevator was located and let Ryan take the lead into the metal container when it arrived with a muffled "ding!" at their floor.
Ryan seemed content to stare at the floor, so Eric gave him a little space and they silently rose towards his apartment level. Whatever Ryan was thinking, Eric wanted to let him sort it out before he made his move...again. He looked over at Ryan, taking in his dark brown hair that was just starting to get shaggy, his clear eyes focused on the spot where the elevator walls and floor met with the intensity of a cat watching a mousehole. Another smile tugged at the corner of Eric's mouth and just at that moment Ryan seemed to realize he was being watched and looked up, meeting Eric's gaze and taking in his smile. Eric could literally see the gears in his head still running a mile a minute, then Ryan tentatively smiled back and shifted his weight in Eric's direction just as the elevator chugged to a stop. Impulsively, Eric grabbed Ryan's hand and practically dragged him through Eric's front door after the bare minimum of key jiggling.
"Welcome to my humble abode." Eric said and let go of Ryan's hand to take off his shoes. Gesturing for Ryan to wait a minute, Eric quickly snuck into his kitchen and made sure it wasn't a disaster area with a fast lookover. From the heated start they shared a hour ago, Eric found it funny that he was more concerned with making sure he hadn't left a sink full of dirty dishes in the kitchen than ripping Ryan's clothes off. He just didn't want to look like a slob, Eric told himself, and he knew it would bug Ryan to see such a mess, nothing special about not wanting that to happen. Satisfied that his place wouldn't embarress him, Eric walked back towards the front door to find only Ryan's shoes waiting for him, carefully tucked to the side.
To Eric's surprise, he found Ryan standing by his mantel, looking at the assortment of framed photos Eric had propped up on the mantel above the fake fireplace. Ryan was giving the pictures more than a cursory, polite glance; his expression was much more serious than Eric would have expected.
"Is this your family?" Ryan asked, his voice as strange as his expression. If Eric was better at reading Ryan, he might have thought Ryan sounded wistful.
"Yeah, it is." Eric replied, grinning at the photo Ryan was pointing at, of his family having a barbeque on the beach two years ago. He had no idea what had possessed him to buy those bright blue swimming trunks.
"Sisters, huh?" Ryan commented, sounding less serious and more amused. Eric chuckled and nodded a little sheepishly.
"Yup, they like to think they have me henpecked but I'm not as wrapped around their little fingers as they think I am. But you know how it is." Eric clapped Ryan on the back with a smile that invited him to share the joke. Ryan smiled back, yet it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Sure." He replied quietly. Before Eric could wonder about Ryan's reaction, the younger CSI had moved past the mantel and finished his exploration of Eric's living room. The way Ryan moved looked suspiciously similar to the way they investigated crime scenes and the fact that Ryan seemed to do it unconsciously was ..well.. kinda cute. Eric grinned again and let himself settle onto his favourite piece of furniture, his pride and joy: a big black leather couch, slightly over-stuffed and smooth as a dream.
"Does my place pass muster?" Eric teased. Ryan looked over at him in surprise, then looked back at the path he had taken around the room and blushed slightly. Eric patted the space beside him on the couch in a deceivingly-innocent gesture and Ryan smiled as he skirted around the coffee table towards him. But before the younger man could plant himself on the soft leather, Eric reached out to snag Ryan's wrist and smoothly pulled Ryan into his lap with barely a bounce. Ryan looked shocked for a long moment; his eyebrows high and green eyes wide. He sat unmoving for so long, looking so unsure of what to do, that Eric couldn't resist chuckling at his expression. Ryan jumped a little at the sound, then slowly relaxed, tentatively putting one hand on Eric's knee and the other in his own lap.
"Are you always this forward?" Ryan asked, bringing only one of his eyebrows back down.
"I like to call it 'being efficient'." Eric replied without losing his grin. Ryan's mouth flattened out into the peculiar unsmiling expression he got whenever he was deeply amused but was trying to not show it, his lips pressed together as if to prevent laughter from escaping. Eric thought it was so quintessential "Ryan Wolfe" that it delighted him to no end and his chuckles became full-fledged laughter. Ryan continued to look at him like he was crazy while Eric leaned his head against the back of the couch and laughed.
"Someone's in a good mood." Ryan remarked, smiling. Eric didn't reply but they both knew that it was the rush of relief that buoyed them, the sense of things finally going right between them. Having Ryan in his lap willingly, with no sense that he intended to move anytime soon, was enough in itself to make Eric feel giddy and confident, like he normally felt with all his conquests. But this wasn't just another one night stand, this was different. It didn't even have anything to do with sex. He needed to prove to Ryan that he could trust himself and what he wanted, and that he could trust Eric. Tonight was all about teaching Ryan how to let go.
"I'm not bothering you with my...efficiency, am I?" Eric asked, calming down for a moment, abruptly feeling a little bit guilty about not asking permission to just yank Ryan down. Ryan just gave him another "A few screws loose, Delko?" look and laughed, white teeth flashing.
"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" Ryan replied, quirking an eyebrow at Eric. The Cuban took that as a good sign and maneuvered one of Ryan's knees to the other side of his lap so that Ryan was facing Eric, which Ryan allowed good-naturedly with some settling back a bit towards Eric's knees, like he was trying to keep his weight off of Eric. It was very considerate of Ryan but comfort was not really what Eric was after.
"Hey, you wouldn't be here if I didn't want you to be here." Eric retorted, grinning. Sharp green eyes twinkled at him as Ryan took in his confident declaration.
"Is this the famous Delko charm I'm seeing, that gets you so many ladies?" Ryan smirked.
"Men too, thank you very much." Eric pointed out, sensing that Ryan was still struggling to repaint his mental picture of his coworker who did have a reputation as purely a ladies'-man. "The rumours are true, you know; we Cubans are unrivaled in our pursuit of passion in all its shapes and forms."
"You sound like a brochure." Ryan made a small face, mock-grimacing.
"What's it gonna to take to convince you I'm serious?" Eric teased, his hands already creeping their way slowly past Ryan's knees and advancing northward. Ryan's breathing hitched and his mouth fell open slightly.
"I-I don't know." He sounded slightly out of breath, stuttering a little as Eric distracted him from thinking properly. Eric's mouth quirked into that lazy grin, now tinged with lust, as he leisurely smoothed his palms around Ryan's slim hips. Once past the seam of Ryan's jeans, Eric switched from slow to quick and had his hands curved around Ryan's backside before the younger CSI could react and Eric was rewarded with a gasp from Ryan that left his mouth properly wide and temptingly wet. Eric gave into the temptation and pulled Ryan forward to join their lips together in a nice, long scorching kiss. Ryan's slender lips, soft with just the right hint of pouty, gave way beneath Eric's; their tongues tentatively meeting and twisting. While they kissed, Eric gave Ryan's backside a firm squeeze and his second reward was the sound of a shaky moan as Ryan sloppily broke their kiss and closed his eyes.
But Eric could still see Ryan holding back; his hands on either side of Eric on the couch shivered from the tension in Ryan's lean frame that spoke of repressed desire. Eric didn't know if it was Ryan's past that haunted him or merely inner demons he couldn't silence, but still Eric removed one of his hands from Ryan's waist to smooth away the crease in Ryan's brow with a gentle thumbtip. At his touch, Ryan's eyes opened again and Eric lost himself in the labyrinth of grey and green contracting wider as Ryan's pupil's shrank in the sudden light.
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