Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Blinded by Misery
"Gerard, great party man." Some guy came up to him and patted his shoulder.
"Thanks, enjoy it." He smiled and held my hand as we made our way through the foyer. I looked down at our hands and blushed, which he noticed right away.
"Nervous?" He asked with a hint of a giggle.
"N..no." I stuttered and he gave my hand a slight squeeze.
"Good, don't be." He brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it with a feather touch. Passing through a huge archway, was a large kitchen with a dining room. He picked up a soda bottle from the counter and turned to me.
"What can I get you?" He asked as I stared outside at the balcony overlooking the city.
"Just water." I smiled. He shook his head.
"This is a party not a church, really let me get you a real drink." He grinned like there was no tomorrow.
"Are you trying to get me wasted?" I asked with a toothy smile.
"No, but if you want to be that won't take long here." He winked. I looked away and rolled my eyes. He handed me a cup of punch that smelled like it had alcohol in it.
"What's in this?" I asked sniffing its contents.
"Punch with vodka." He nudged my back to move over to the door.
"Gerard, I really don't want to drink." I told him turning around to face him. He just laughed and took it from my hand.
"Okay, princess. Whatever you want." I watched as he sat the glass down on a table next to where we were standing.
"For this to be your party, you act like you aren't interested in your guests." I said looking around at all the eloquent ladies and gents dancing and socializing.
"It gets old. I'd rather talk to you." He flirted. I blushed and was interrupted in that moment by a high pitched voice.
"Gerard, what are you doing later?" I saw two girls approach him.
"I'm busy." He said not taking his eyes off me.
"Well, thanks for last night. It was wonderful." The blonde kissed his cheek and walked away with her friend. I stared as she waddled her hips as she walked. I glared at Gerard and knew this guy was seriously a whore.
"Sleep around much?" I glared until I started walking away.
"Chrysanthemum.." He started but I was already approaching the door. I looked back and saw him following me as he pushed his way through the crowd. I pulled the door open and left it open as I made my way down the steps. I started walking down the street before I heard him chasing me and calling my name.
"Chrysanthemum. Stop! Please?" He begged before he grabbed my arm.
"Why? Is that why you brought me here tonight. Thought I would be some naive little girl to fuck?" I snarled as he held tightly to me. "Let go." I glared. He continued to hold onto both of my arms.
"No, just listen." He began but I knew it was to good to be true. "I took her out to dinner last night with my brother and his wife. I needed a date, so I just used her. I wouldn't ever deceive women like that." He said brushing my hair from my face.
"Why do I find that so hard to believe?" I whispered as people walking by stared us down. He wouldn't take his eyes off of me for one second, even if we were drawing a lot of attention.
"I deserve that." He looked down at his feet. "But when I saw you sitting there this morning, I was practically drawn to you." He looked back up and smiled. "I couldn't stay away even if I could." He rubbed my arms up and down seeing as it was freezing out here. His touch made me hot even if it was 30 degrees.
"Just please come back inside?" He begged. I let out a long sigh and nodded.
"Okay." I whispered staring at the ground. He wrapped a arm around my shoulder and we walked back inside. We were greeted at the door by a few people leaving. Then a couple I hadn't seen yet.
"Hey bro." The dark blonde guy said. Gerard hugged him and then the girl next to him.
"Mikey, Alicia this is Chrysanthemum. Beautiful, this is my brother and sister -in -law." I smiled and Alica shook my hand as well as Mikey.
"Nice to meet you." Mikey said. He held onto Alicia and kissed her head.
"We're gonna head out. See you later." He said to Gerard. Gerard just smiled and nodded. We walked past them and straight thru the house to the balcony outside. Fortunately it was heated which was a luxury.
"I like your brother." I said softly leaning against the balcony with my arms wrapped around the edge.
"He's a real charmer." Gerard chuckled. I could tell something was bugging him.
"I'm sorry." I said looking down at the city below. I glanced to the side of me and saw him lean back on the railing next to me.
"Why?" He asked confused.
"For acting like a bitch." I bluntly stated.
"Sweetheart, you had a right to act that way. But I can promise you, I'm not some ass who takes advantage of girls. Sure I get a lot of attention from them but it doesn't mean I'm interested." He laughed. I had to roll my eyes but in a good way.
"Oh." Was all I could think to say. I straightened up a little bit and ran my fingertip over the cold railing. I just watched the way the light danced across my ring finger and couldn't help but hope one day I would meet someone special and get married. That was all I ever wanted. A real wedding and a happy family. I didn't grow up with that for sure.
"Are you okay?" He asked looking over at me. I looked up to see his hazel eyes shining bright from the glow of the city.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled to assure him.
"No, your not. Whats' wrong?" He turned me towards him and I shook my head.
"Nothing." I lied.
"Okay, well if you ever need to talk I'm here." He smiled as I felt his gaze on my face. I shivered a little bit and he pulled me into him so my face was snuggled in his chiseled chest.
"Cold?" He asked as he put his chin on top of my head.
"Not now." I whispered. I could feel him smile and it made me happy for once in my life. Gerard wasn't so bad. Actually, I liked him very much. He was handsome, kind, a bit cocky but that's not awful, caring, basically everything I ever wanted. I was enjoying the silence as he stood holding me before he broke it.
"What time do you want to be home?" He asked into my hair. I didn't take my face out of his shirt to speak.
"Whenever." I smiled but didn't really want to leave him.
"Does your mom and dad want you home at a certain time?" He asked softly. Shit, that really did it. I started crying like a baby.
"Sugar, what's the matter?" He asked holding me even tighter. I shook my head and he rubbed my back soothingly.
"What did I say?" He asked knowing he said something wrong.
"I'm sorry. I'm so stupid." I blubbered as I raised my head to wipe my now eyeliner smudged eyes. This is exactly why I never wear any dark makeup.
"Honey, talk to me." He said looking down into my eyes which didn't want to meet his.
"Its complicated." I stuttered.
"Okay, you obviously don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry I said anything." He added softly before pulling me to him again.
"No its okay. Its my fault I guess."
"Whats your fault?" He tried to pry it from me. I knew I might as well before he slipped up again.
"My dad, my mom. Just everything, I guess it was me." I started crying again into his black buttoned up coat.
"Oh, honey nothing is ever your fault between your parents. Don't let anyone tell you differently." He apparently thought I meant divorce, boy was he off.
"No, they didn't get divorced but I wish they did." I sobbed even louder.
"Okay, okay. Sorry, sh. Its okay, let it all out." He soothed me. I just wish my dad was this way when I got hurt by a boy or just needed to cry but when I got hurt he made it worse. It was like his own sick game that he got pleasure out of. I felt used and worthless.
He pulled me away just slightly so he could tilt my head up to look into his eyes.
"Do you want me to take you home?" He asked. I hesitated a minute and then nodded. "Okay, come on." He gave me a small smile before wrapping an arm around my waist as he led me to his car outside his home. Once in the car I stared at the cars we passed through the foggy window. I could feel Gerard glance over at me every now and then, but I just couldn't face him. Once I saw the familiar street, I knew we were close. As he pulled parallel to the curb he put the car in park.
"Would you like me to walk you up?" He asked as he stared into my eyes.
"No, that's okay." I told him and got out of the car. I was about to shut the door but I got back in.
"Would you like to come upstairs Gerard?" I asked with a small smile. He smiled back.
"Only if you want me to." He said looking over his shoulder at my building. I blushed and nodded.
"Okay, I'll come in but only for a little while." He smiled and cut the ignition off. I ran across the street with him close behind me. He followed me over to the elevator and pushed my floor number. I looked at him funny.
"Remember Frank and Jamia are my friends. I visit them a lot." He caught my freaked out expression but it faded after he spoke.
"Oh yeah. Its been a long night." I looked down at the floor and felt it come to a stop. I stepped out and he took my hand. Once at my door I unlocked it and led him inside.
"Your place is precious, just like you." He grinned.
"Thank you." I said slipping off my coat and took his for him.
"I haven't really gone to the store but can I get you some coffee, seeing as that is all I have." I said turning around from the cabinet to see him leaning against the counter smirking.
"I would love some. But hold the sugar, I have enough sweetness in front of me." He winked leaving me breathless.
"Make yourself comfortable." I said gesturing to the den while I grabbed two mugs from the shelf.
"Do you paint?" He said from the other the room. I giggled to myself.
"A little. I sort of suck." I blushed even though he wasn't there to see it. After the steaming coffee was poured into the mugs I pranced to the den where he was admiring a few paintings hung on the wall.
"This is beautiful, did you do it?" He asked looking at a barn located on a field covered in white snow. I handed him is cup of heaven.
"I did actually but it could probably use some improving." I said taking a sip of the java.
"I actually graduated from Art School, maybe I could give you some pointers." He said admiring my work again.
"Sure. That would be nice." I said walking over a little ways to the ceiling to floor window. I felt him come behind me and heard his mug being placed on the table beside me. He reached around and took mine from my hands and sat it down. I then felt his arms being slipped around my waist while his face nuzzled my neck. I could feel his breath panting down it and he was seriously making me flush more than ever.
"Your the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." He said into my hot flesh.
"Liar." I whispered as I turned around in his arms. He loosened them for a second only to tighten again once I was facing him. I placed my hands on his biceps and gave them a small squeeze before he pulled my body as close to his as possible. It felt so good to be this close to him. The room was dark other than the gleam from the city lights and the shadows that danced over the walls.
"I just met you today, but I feel like I've known you forever." I whispered as I stared into his eyes.
"I know what you mean." He whispered back. I felt myself lean in closer to him but stopped. I let my eyes travel across his perfect lips and back up to his eyes that bore into mine. That was when I pulled away completely.
"I can't do this." I said hating myself.
"I knew I shouldn't have come, this is my fault." He said backing away. I turned back around to see him a few feet away now.
"God Gerard. You have no idea how bad I want you but I just can't." I whispered feeling tears build up in my glistening eyes. "I'm sorry. I really am."
"No, its fine. I guess I'll see you tomorrow night at the show. Have a nice night, well I should actually say morning Chrysanthemum." With that he left leaving me to hate myself. Is it possible to fall in love with a guy you just met in the same day?
"Thanks, enjoy it." He smiled and held my hand as we made our way through the foyer. I looked down at our hands and blushed, which he noticed right away.
"Nervous?" He asked with a hint of a giggle.
"N..no." I stuttered and he gave my hand a slight squeeze.
"Good, don't be." He brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it with a feather touch. Passing through a huge archway, was a large kitchen with a dining room. He picked up a soda bottle from the counter and turned to me.
"What can I get you?" He asked as I stared outside at the balcony overlooking the city.
"Just water." I smiled. He shook his head.
"This is a party not a church, really let me get you a real drink." He grinned like there was no tomorrow.
"Are you trying to get me wasted?" I asked with a toothy smile.
"No, but if you want to be that won't take long here." He winked. I looked away and rolled my eyes. He handed me a cup of punch that smelled like it had alcohol in it.
"What's in this?" I asked sniffing its contents.
"Punch with vodka." He nudged my back to move over to the door.
"Gerard, I really don't want to drink." I told him turning around to face him. He just laughed and took it from my hand.
"Okay, princess. Whatever you want." I watched as he sat the glass down on a table next to where we were standing.
"For this to be your party, you act like you aren't interested in your guests." I said looking around at all the eloquent ladies and gents dancing and socializing.
"It gets old. I'd rather talk to you." He flirted. I blushed and was interrupted in that moment by a high pitched voice.
"Gerard, what are you doing later?" I saw two girls approach him.
"I'm busy." He said not taking his eyes off me.
"Well, thanks for last night. It was wonderful." The blonde kissed his cheek and walked away with her friend. I stared as she waddled her hips as she walked. I glared at Gerard and knew this guy was seriously a whore.
"Sleep around much?" I glared until I started walking away.
"Chrysanthemum.." He started but I was already approaching the door. I looked back and saw him following me as he pushed his way through the crowd. I pulled the door open and left it open as I made my way down the steps. I started walking down the street before I heard him chasing me and calling my name.
"Chrysanthemum. Stop! Please?" He begged before he grabbed my arm.
"Why? Is that why you brought me here tonight. Thought I would be some naive little girl to fuck?" I snarled as he held tightly to me. "Let go." I glared. He continued to hold onto both of my arms.
"No, just listen." He began but I knew it was to good to be true. "I took her out to dinner last night with my brother and his wife. I needed a date, so I just used her. I wouldn't ever deceive women like that." He said brushing my hair from my face.
"Why do I find that so hard to believe?" I whispered as people walking by stared us down. He wouldn't take his eyes off of me for one second, even if we were drawing a lot of attention.
"I deserve that." He looked down at his feet. "But when I saw you sitting there this morning, I was practically drawn to you." He looked back up and smiled. "I couldn't stay away even if I could." He rubbed my arms up and down seeing as it was freezing out here. His touch made me hot even if it was 30 degrees.
"Just please come back inside?" He begged. I let out a long sigh and nodded.
"Okay." I whispered staring at the ground. He wrapped a arm around my shoulder and we walked back inside. We were greeted at the door by a few people leaving. Then a couple I hadn't seen yet.
"Hey bro." The dark blonde guy said. Gerard hugged him and then the girl next to him.
"Mikey, Alicia this is Chrysanthemum. Beautiful, this is my brother and sister -in -law." I smiled and Alica shook my hand as well as Mikey.
"Nice to meet you." Mikey said. He held onto Alicia and kissed her head.
"We're gonna head out. See you later." He said to Gerard. Gerard just smiled and nodded. We walked past them and straight thru the house to the balcony outside. Fortunately it was heated which was a luxury.
"I like your brother." I said softly leaning against the balcony with my arms wrapped around the edge.
"He's a real charmer." Gerard chuckled. I could tell something was bugging him.
"I'm sorry." I said looking down at the city below. I glanced to the side of me and saw him lean back on the railing next to me.
"Why?" He asked confused.
"For acting like a bitch." I bluntly stated.
"Sweetheart, you had a right to act that way. But I can promise you, I'm not some ass who takes advantage of girls. Sure I get a lot of attention from them but it doesn't mean I'm interested." He laughed. I had to roll my eyes but in a good way.
"Oh." Was all I could think to say. I straightened up a little bit and ran my fingertip over the cold railing. I just watched the way the light danced across my ring finger and couldn't help but hope one day I would meet someone special and get married. That was all I ever wanted. A real wedding and a happy family. I didn't grow up with that for sure.
"Are you okay?" He asked looking over at me. I looked up to see his hazel eyes shining bright from the glow of the city.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I smiled to assure him.
"No, your not. Whats' wrong?" He turned me towards him and I shook my head.
"Nothing." I lied.
"Okay, well if you ever need to talk I'm here." He smiled as I felt his gaze on my face. I shivered a little bit and he pulled me into him so my face was snuggled in his chiseled chest.
"Cold?" He asked as he put his chin on top of my head.
"Not now." I whispered. I could feel him smile and it made me happy for once in my life. Gerard wasn't so bad. Actually, I liked him very much. He was handsome, kind, a bit cocky but that's not awful, caring, basically everything I ever wanted. I was enjoying the silence as he stood holding me before he broke it.
"What time do you want to be home?" He asked into my hair. I didn't take my face out of his shirt to speak.
"Whenever." I smiled but didn't really want to leave him.
"Does your mom and dad want you home at a certain time?" He asked softly. Shit, that really did it. I started crying like a baby.
"Sugar, what's the matter?" He asked holding me even tighter. I shook my head and he rubbed my back soothingly.
"What did I say?" He asked knowing he said something wrong.
"I'm sorry. I'm so stupid." I blubbered as I raised my head to wipe my now eyeliner smudged eyes. This is exactly why I never wear any dark makeup.
"Honey, talk to me." He said looking down into my eyes which didn't want to meet his.
"Its complicated." I stuttered.
"Okay, you obviously don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry I said anything." He added softly before pulling me to him again.
"No its okay. Its my fault I guess."
"Whats your fault?" He tried to pry it from me. I knew I might as well before he slipped up again.
"My dad, my mom. Just everything, I guess it was me." I started crying again into his black buttoned up coat.
"Oh, honey nothing is ever your fault between your parents. Don't let anyone tell you differently." He apparently thought I meant divorce, boy was he off.
"No, they didn't get divorced but I wish they did." I sobbed even louder.
"Okay, okay. Sorry, sh. Its okay, let it all out." He soothed me. I just wish my dad was this way when I got hurt by a boy or just needed to cry but when I got hurt he made it worse. It was like his own sick game that he got pleasure out of. I felt used and worthless.
He pulled me away just slightly so he could tilt my head up to look into his eyes.
"Do you want me to take you home?" He asked. I hesitated a minute and then nodded. "Okay, come on." He gave me a small smile before wrapping an arm around my waist as he led me to his car outside his home. Once in the car I stared at the cars we passed through the foggy window. I could feel Gerard glance over at me every now and then, but I just couldn't face him. Once I saw the familiar street, I knew we were close. As he pulled parallel to the curb he put the car in park.
"Would you like me to walk you up?" He asked as he stared into my eyes.
"No, that's okay." I told him and got out of the car. I was about to shut the door but I got back in.
"Would you like to come upstairs Gerard?" I asked with a small smile. He smiled back.
"Only if you want me to." He said looking over his shoulder at my building. I blushed and nodded.
"Okay, I'll come in but only for a little while." He smiled and cut the ignition off. I ran across the street with him close behind me. He followed me over to the elevator and pushed my floor number. I looked at him funny.
"Remember Frank and Jamia are my friends. I visit them a lot." He caught my freaked out expression but it faded after he spoke.
"Oh yeah. Its been a long night." I looked down at the floor and felt it come to a stop. I stepped out and he took my hand. Once at my door I unlocked it and led him inside.
"Your place is precious, just like you." He grinned.
"Thank you." I said slipping off my coat and took his for him.
"I haven't really gone to the store but can I get you some coffee, seeing as that is all I have." I said turning around from the cabinet to see him leaning against the counter smirking.
"I would love some. But hold the sugar, I have enough sweetness in front of me." He winked leaving me breathless.
"Make yourself comfortable." I said gesturing to the den while I grabbed two mugs from the shelf.
"Do you paint?" He said from the other the room. I giggled to myself.
"A little. I sort of suck." I blushed even though he wasn't there to see it. After the steaming coffee was poured into the mugs I pranced to the den where he was admiring a few paintings hung on the wall.
"This is beautiful, did you do it?" He asked looking at a barn located on a field covered in white snow. I handed him is cup of heaven.
"I did actually but it could probably use some improving." I said taking a sip of the java.
"I actually graduated from Art School, maybe I could give you some pointers." He said admiring my work again.
"Sure. That would be nice." I said walking over a little ways to the ceiling to floor window. I felt him come behind me and heard his mug being placed on the table beside me. He reached around and took mine from my hands and sat it down. I then felt his arms being slipped around my waist while his face nuzzled my neck. I could feel his breath panting down it and he was seriously making me flush more than ever.
"Your the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." He said into my hot flesh.
"Liar." I whispered as I turned around in his arms. He loosened them for a second only to tighten again once I was facing him. I placed my hands on his biceps and gave them a small squeeze before he pulled my body as close to his as possible. It felt so good to be this close to him. The room was dark other than the gleam from the city lights and the shadows that danced over the walls.
"I just met you today, but I feel like I've known you forever." I whispered as I stared into his eyes.
"I know what you mean." He whispered back. I felt myself lean in closer to him but stopped. I let my eyes travel across his perfect lips and back up to his eyes that bore into mine. That was when I pulled away completely.
"I can't do this." I said hating myself.
"I knew I shouldn't have come, this is my fault." He said backing away. I turned back around to see him a few feet away now.
"God Gerard. You have no idea how bad I want you but I just can't." I whispered feeling tears build up in my glistening eyes. "I'm sorry. I really am."
"No, its fine. I guess I'll see you tomorrow night at the show. Have a nice night, well I should actually say morning Chrysanthemum." With that he left leaving me to hate myself. Is it possible to fall in love with a guy you just met in the same day?
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