FicWad

Hey there guys. So I don`t know if you have seen the note I posted the other day but seeing as I wasn`t at the hospital today (Dad thought I should have a day at and try to get some work done) I found a little time to write. I actually kind of like this chapter, and I hope you do as well. If you have not read the note yet could you please do so? Anyone want to have a guess at what has happened in Gerard`s past? And what about Mikey, eh, where is he? Have a guess, I wanna know what you think
xoxodakota
Frank`s pov
We all stared, eyes wide, mouths gaping open at the empty, silent hallway, frozen in a state of complete shock. My head was spinning, brain desperately trying to figure out what the hell had just happened and why Gerard had reacted to the innocent question in such a way. What had been said that caused him act like that?
Frowning I raise a shaking hand to flick my scruffy, dyed fringe out of my eyes, nervously looking around the room, shooting everyone in it questioning glances. Bob and Ray both share the same expression on their faces as I do, we were all terribly confused by our friend’s reaction. And if I was being completely honest with you, I would even go as far as to say that I was a little worried about the red haired boy, that wasn’t a normal thing to do when asked a simple question.
“Erm, does he normally act like that?”Mum asks Ray and Bob, who were sat, looking as surprised as I felt, on the edge of my unmade bed, Bob biting on his lower, pierced lip nervously.
“No, he doesn`t.” Ray admits in a small voice, frowning across the small box room at her.
“I didn`t mean to upset him or anything, I was only curious, it has been so long since I even heard from his family, his mother was a great friend of mine.” her honey brown eyes were full of concern and confusion, I knew from experience that it was never a good sign when my ,other didn’t understand something, she hated being out of control of situations, she hated it with a passion.
I smile up at her, forcing it upon my anxious face, trying to reassure myself as much as I was her.
“We`ll go find him, see if he`s alright.” Bob and Ray get to their feet, looking only too happy to have an excuse to leave the room, where the memories of the hate filed, almost frightened look on our friends face remained only too fresh in our minds.
“Do you boys want some help looking for him?”
We declined her offer, explaining that if Gerard saw an adult whom he had embarrassed himself in front of he may not want to come and talk to us about what was wrong with him.
“Do you think Gee`s alright?” I ask the two others, trying to make sure my voice didn’t display as much of the anxiety and worry I felt.
Bob narrows his bright blue eyes at me, unnerving me slightly. I tell you, that kid could look right into the very depths of your soul with his eyes. Ray coughs, breaking the slightly awkward ,uncomfortable silence, answering my earlier question. His answer dint make me feel any better though.
“I don`t know, he`s always been odd when it came to family and shit like that, but recently he`s been getting even weirder.”
Bob turns his gaze away from me, flicking his sandy coloured hair from his face, his expression was unreadable, he looked as though he was concentrating extremely hard on something, I didn’t know what though, and I didn’t think I liked to know.
“Ray’s right ya know, over the past few months he’s become even more distant. we both tired asking what was wrong, but he always just changed the subject.”
He glances over at Ray, who nods once, barely lowering his head, confusing me even more.
“We`re really getting worried about him, Frank.” He admits in a hushed voice, looking around the empty streets as he does so, almost as though he was expecting someone to be listening in to our conversation. “We really are.”
Gerard`s pov
I run from the house, my crimson red, dishevelled hair covering my hazel green eyes and most of my face as I run, thankfully stopping any nosy passersby from looking at my ugly face. stinging hot, blooding tears threaten to fall from my eyes and stain my pale cheeks, but I refuse to let them do so, crying was a sign of weakness, and despite what I had been told for a good part of my life, I was not weak. I refused to let myself be weak, and no one, not even he could have any form of control of power over me.
Not anymore.
It was no good. I sigh and slow down slightly, changing my pace to a fast walk, wiping the shameful, weak tears away that had dared escape from my eyes.
How could you be so stupid, Gerard?
The voice in my head scolds me, repeating the same words that he had yelled at me, screeched at me and beat into me so many times in my short, dreadful life.
I blink once, wipe away the last of the tears, stand up straight and being running again, my trembling hand scrambles around in my jacket pocket, searching for my trusty IPod to drown out the harsh, cold reality of the outside world, it worked well at blocking out my own mind as well, thank the gods.
…
“I`m home.” I tell the silent, empty hallway as I kick off my scruffy looking black converse, shrugging my black jacket of and hanging it up carelessly on the hook. I hadn`t expected an answer, it was just a habit from when I was younger, and even more miserable and hopeless (if that was even possible) than I was today.
I enter the untidy living room, turn on the television and find a hastily scrawled note form mom on the stable, propped up by an empty coke bottle. She was working late tonight, figures. I loved my mom, I really did but since the split I never really saw her. then again it wasn`t really her fault, before he, I refused to think of that vile, disgusting man as my father, had paid all of the bills, and now we had to scrimp and save just to make sure the bills were all paid and we had food on the table.
I look up at the brown, old fashioned mantelpiece and sigh, briefly catching a glimpse of school photos form long ago, mom still hadn’t given into my desperate pleas and threats to dispose of them.
They all showed a raven haired boy, dressed in his torn or stained school uniform, with his school tie wrapped around the top of his head, as opposed to around his pale neck, the only differences between them were that in each new frame it showed a slightly older child.
Sat on the end of the mantelpiece, next to the framed images of the black haired boy, me, was a single, torn picture of another child, yet another boy. This time the child had brown hair, and rather geeky glasses that were slightly wonky and his uniform was a little neater than mine, but still not what you could call smart. The photo was old, and was the only on showing this other child, my little brother...our Mikey…
I glare up at the old images of the smiling, oblivious children and get to my feet, unable to stay in the same room as them.
Things had changed so much since those pictures were taken, and not always for the better….