Categories > Books > Harry Potter
Michael Myers And The Tragedy Of Harry Potter
0 reviewsTo escape the wrath of Lord Voldemort and his Death Eaters, James and Lily Potter move away with baby in tow from Wizarding Britain to the American Midwest. Just their luck, they happened to pick t...
0Unrated
Here's a little something to dampen whatever is left of your holiday spirit.
Authors Note: A lot of people, including John Carpenter(the director of the first Halloween film) don't like the sequels to Halloween very much because they give Michael Myers, who should be totally mysterious and an enigma, too much back story. I tend to agree with this, and I think the the first film ideally should be viewed as a stand alone entity, with the sequels just being basically “What If?” or “AU” stories. That being said, the sequels, while not nearly as good as the original, aren't bad stuff for a completest mythology hound like me, and in order for a good Harry Potter/Halloween crossover to work in my opinion, I chose to include the mystical explanation from Halloween 6 for why Michael does what he does.
This story is dedicated to Ruskbyte, though I don't think I have a prayer at mixing the slasher horror genre with Harry Potter as well as he does.
MICHAEL MYERS AND THE TRAGEDY OF HARRY POTTER
October 31st. 1981- Halloween Night
“Oh James.”
“Ah...Lily.”
“James”
“Lily”
“JAMES!”
Lily Potter immediately pushed her husband towards her and out of the way of the large butcher's knife coming straight for him. The blade impaled James' pillow. If his wife had been only a fraction of a second slower, it would have impaled his neck. The couple rolled off of the bed and went into the fighting stances they learned in Auror training. The shape at the other corner of the large queen size slowly pulled it's knife from the pillow, and then stared blankly at Lily and James, If we survive this night, this is the last time we snog in the dark, Lily thought grimly.
James could make out the shape's face in what little light the bedroom window provided, or rather, the shape's mask. It was a painted white replica of Captain Kirk's face, just like that muggle man Dr. Loomis had warned him about. The shape's name was Michael Myers. He was supposed to be pure evil. The embodiment of it. The distillation of everything unholy. But that didn't explain how the hell he got past the Anti-Muggle charms let alone the Fidelius Charm.
It was almost as if...no. For a moment, James had thought Michael had waited for this exact moment when he and Lily would be naked and defenseless without their wands. That he was in this house the entire time, waiting. Getting used to their mannerisms and habits.
But how could he know such a thing? Oh damn it, I told Lily we shouldn't have moved to this hell house.
An even worse possibility then crossed James' mind. What if Michael had just came in through that broken window in the basement, and the Fidelius Charm had no effect at all on him at all? After all, he wasn't supposed to be entirely human.
Slowly, almost like the standoff between Blondie, Angel Eyes, and Tuco at the end of The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, the two of them reached down towards the floor, at the very edge of the bed, for their wands. They both knew that they had to be quick. If they weren't, Michael would dogpile them both. You see, Michael's a really big guy. Strong too. One time, he crushed a man's skull to dust with his bare hands...
THREE MONTHS AGO-
“Well, this is it” said Lily.
The house at 45 Lampkin Lane in Haddonfield, Illinois was the place that they were going to lay low at for a while. At least until Harry was a little older. He deserved a happy childhood, the poor thing. Wizarding War II(or just WWII-you can't expect wizards to keep up with our wars, you see?) was heating up, with James and Lily each escaping from certain death at the hands of Lord Voldemort three times a piece. They just couldn't bear having their young son live in that kind of hostile environment. So they shipped off overseas to the U.S, where practically everyone was either a muggle, a mudblood, a dilettante(someone who practices magic, but isn't officially a magical person by birth), or was too drunk to care about such silly things as blood purity. And barring that, the Fidelius Charm made sure that no one important except James' good friend Peter would ever know the location of their house.
Lily had some long lost cousins in the area, the Myers.
“Are you sure it's safe?” asked James. “If you ask me, living in a house where someone was murdered is just asking for trouble.”
“But that's exactly why it's so perfect for a hiding spot. The muggles in this town are so afraid of what happened here that they'll never want to stop in for tea.”
“Lily, didn't that little bastard come back a bunch of years later and try to finish the job on the rest of your family?”
“Three years ago, actually. But he was killed by his caretaker in a duel at the local hospital.”
“How can you be so callous about it, Lill? Distant cousins or not, Judy and Laurie were and still are your family. Don't you care about them?”
“I...just have really big issues with my family. I don't like talking about it. And besides, I didn't even know that the Myers part of my family existed until Kingsley told me about them.”
“So where is Laurie now?”
“No idea” said Lily. “The official report still says that she's a missing person, but I'd like to think that she ran away and started a new life. That's what I would do.”
“That's what we're doing right now”, observed James.
Lily smiled grimly.
“Wait, how did he die?” asked James.
“Who?”
“Your cousin or whatever. The one who was crazy.”
“Oh, he died after his caretaker blew up the hospital with some oxygen tanks.”
“Oxy-what?”
“Oxygen, honey. You're breathing it right now.”
James thought about for a moment, recalling any of his Muggle Studies classes. “Oh! Now I know what you're talking about. So it really took that much to kill him? An exploding building? Tough little bastard he must have been.”
“And his caretaker too” said Lily. “Don't forget about him. It takes balls to sacrifice yourself for the good of everyone else the way he did. If only I knew his name, it escapes me at the moment...”
“Didn't Kingsley tell you everything about it?”
“Well, you know Kingsley. Not exactly Mr. Sociable. He just let me know the gist of what was going on. It's really nothing to worry about, James. Michael Myers was an aberration. By all accounts, he was the lone exception in what otherwise is a pretty normal clan of people.”
“A pretty sexy clan of people, am I right?” laughed James.
James smiled at his own joke even when Lily didn't respond. He then looked at the photo of the living room of their new house, holding it with the thumb and index finger of his left hand. His other hand was holding onto the baby carriage that Harry was sleeping in, which Lily was also grabbing, waiting for the signal.
You see, in order to have a properly functioning Fidelius charm, the occupants who will then live in it
must initially enter the household magically, usually through portkey but apparation works
fine too. Going through any traditional entrances after the initial incantations have been spoken somehow breaks the hold of the magic.
“Remember what the living room looks like?”
“I do” said Lily confidently.
“OK” said James. “On the count of three. One. Two. Three...”
And the family of three suddenly apparated into their new home, the one that everyone said the boogeyman used to live in.
Authors Note: A lot of people, including John Carpenter(the director of the first Halloween film) don't like the sequels to Halloween very much because they give Michael Myers, who should be totally mysterious and an enigma, too much back story. I tend to agree with this, and I think the the first film ideally should be viewed as a stand alone entity, with the sequels just being basically “What If?” or “AU” stories. That being said, the sequels, while not nearly as good as the original, aren't bad stuff for a completest mythology hound like me, and in order for a good Harry Potter/Halloween crossover to work in my opinion, I chose to include the mystical explanation from Halloween 6 for why Michael does what he does.
This story is dedicated to Ruskbyte, though I don't think I have a prayer at mixing the slasher horror genre with Harry Potter as well as he does.
MICHAEL MYERS AND THE TRAGEDY OF HARRY POTTER
October 31st. 1981- Halloween Night
“Oh James.”
“Ah...Lily.”
“James”
“Lily”
“JAMES!”
Lily Potter immediately pushed her husband towards her and out of the way of the large butcher's knife coming straight for him. The blade impaled James' pillow. If his wife had been only a fraction of a second slower, it would have impaled his neck. The couple rolled off of the bed and went into the fighting stances they learned in Auror training. The shape at the other corner of the large queen size slowly pulled it's knife from the pillow, and then stared blankly at Lily and James, If we survive this night, this is the last time we snog in the dark, Lily thought grimly.
James could make out the shape's face in what little light the bedroom window provided, or rather, the shape's mask. It was a painted white replica of Captain Kirk's face, just like that muggle man Dr. Loomis had warned him about. The shape's name was Michael Myers. He was supposed to be pure evil. The embodiment of it. The distillation of everything unholy. But that didn't explain how the hell he got past the Anti-Muggle charms let alone the Fidelius Charm.
It was almost as if...no. For a moment, James had thought Michael had waited for this exact moment when he and Lily would be naked and defenseless without their wands. That he was in this house the entire time, waiting. Getting used to their mannerisms and habits.
But how could he know such a thing? Oh damn it, I told Lily we shouldn't have moved to this hell house.
An even worse possibility then crossed James' mind. What if Michael had just came in through that broken window in the basement, and the Fidelius Charm had no effect at all on him at all? After all, he wasn't supposed to be entirely human.
Slowly, almost like the standoff between Blondie, Angel Eyes, and Tuco at the end of The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, the two of them reached down towards the floor, at the very edge of the bed, for their wands. They both knew that they had to be quick. If they weren't, Michael would dogpile them both. You see, Michael's a really big guy. Strong too. One time, he crushed a man's skull to dust with his bare hands...
THREE MONTHS AGO-
“Well, this is it” said Lily.
The house at 45 Lampkin Lane in Haddonfield, Illinois was the place that they were going to lay low at for a while. At least until Harry was a little older. He deserved a happy childhood, the poor thing. Wizarding War II(or just WWII-you can't expect wizards to keep up with our wars, you see?) was heating up, with James and Lily each escaping from certain death at the hands of Lord Voldemort three times a piece. They just couldn't bear having their young son live in that kind of hostile environment. So they shipped off overseas to the U.S, where practically everyone was either a muggle, a mudblood, a dilettante(someone who practices magic, but isn't officially a magical person by birth), or was too drunk to care about such silly things as blood purity. And barring that, the Fidelius Charm made sure that no one important except James' good friend Peter would ever know the location of their house.
Lily had some long lost cousins in the area, the Myers.
“Are you sure it's safe?” asked James. “If you ask me, living in a house where someone was murdered is just asking for trouble.”
“But that's exactly why it's so perfect for a hiding spot. The muggles in this town are so afraid of what happened here that they'll never want to stop in for tea.”
“Lily, didn't that little bastard come back a bunch of years later and try to finish the job on the rest of your family?”
“Three years ago, actually. But he was killed by his caretaker in a duel at the local hospital.”
“How can you be so callous about it, Lill? Distant cousins or not, Judy and Laurie were and still are your family. Don't you care about them?”
“I...just have really big issues with my family. I don't like talking about it. And besides, I didn't even know that the Myers part of my family existed until Kingsley told me about them.”
“So where is Laurie now?”
“No idea” said Lily. “The official report still says that she's a missing person, but I'd like to think that she ran away and started a new life. That's what I would do.”
“That's what we're doing right now”, observed James.
Lily smiled grimly.
“Wait, how did he die?” asked James.
“Who?”
“Your cousin or whatever. The one who was crazy.”
“Oh, he died after his caretaker blew up the hospital with some oxygen tanks.”
“Oxy-what?”
“Oxygen, honey. You're breathing it right now.”
James thought about for a moment, recalling any of his Muggle Studies classes. “Oh! Now I know what you're talking about. So it really took that much to kill him? An exploding building? Tough little bastard he must have been.”
“And his caretaker too” said Lily. “Don't forget about him. It takes balls to sacrifice yourself for the good of everyone else the way he did. If only I knew his name, it escapes me at the moment...”
“Didn't Kingsley tell you everything about it?”
“Well, you know Kingsley. Not exactly Mr. Sociable. He just let me know the gist of what was going on. It's really nothing to worry about, James. Michael Myers was an aberration. By all accounts, he was the lone exception in what otherwise is a pretty normal clan of people.”
“A pretty sexy clan of people, am I right?” laughed James.
James smiled at his own joke even when Lily didn't respond. He then looked at the photo of the living room of their new house, holding it with the thumb and index finger of his left hand. His other hand was holding onto the baby carriage that Harry was sleeping in, which Lily was also grabbing, waiting for the signal.
You see, in order to have a properly functioning Fidelius charm, the occupants who will then live in it
must initially enter the household magically, usually through portkey but apparation works
fine too. Going through any traditional entrances after the initial incantations have been spoken somehow breaks the hold of the magic.
“Remember what the living room looks like?”
“I do” said Lily confidently.
“OK” said James. “On the count of three. One. Two. Three...”
And the family of three suddenly apparated into their new home, the one that everyone said the boogeyman used to live in.
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