FicWad

Mikey's P.O.V

I run my hands through my hair as I dial Gerard's number again, pacing up and down outside the hospital and seriously craving a coffee.
'Hi, this is Gerard. I can't come to the phone right now so leave a message after the ear splitting beep and-' it goes to his annoyingly cheerful answer phone message. Again. I sigh in frustration and place my phone back in my pocket, scuffing my feet on the ground when my thigh vibrates. It takes me about five seconds to realise its my phone. I rip it out of my pocket and answer it without even looking at the caller ID.
'Gerard?' I ask. A shaky sigh sounds from the other end of the phone.
'Oh Mikey. What have I done?' His words make my heart ache. 
'Gee, you didn't do anything wrong, okay?' 
'Mikey?! Frank tried to kill himself! Because of me. How could I do that, how-how could he do that?' I sigh.
'I don't know Gee, I really don't know,' I whisper.
'I'm coming down there,' Gerard says suddenly.
'Okay?' I reply.
'Yeah, I-I just, I have to, okay? I need to see Frankie.'
'Okay.' I sigh, 'I love you.' but Gerard's hung up before he can hear it.
I stand there for about five minutes with my phone still pressed against my ear, not bothering to move or even feel when I car skids into the car park and stops right in front of me.
'MIKEY!' Gerard calls, climbing out of the car. My brain kicks back into gear and I put my phone back in my pocket, shaking my head to try and order the scrambled thoughts that have suddenly burst into my brain.
'Hey Gee,' I say as he approaches me and envelopes me in a huge hug. Me skips a beat as a sink into his warmth and wrap my arms around his slightly pudgy waist.
'Is Frankie okay?' he asks before pulling away, lightly ghosting my temple with his lips, not enough for anyone else to see but enough for me to feel it. I stare into his green eyes for a second before replying,
'Yeah, he was sleeping when I left but he woke up before that.' Gerard sighs and he visibly relaxes.
'Good, come one then,' he says, smiling slightly as he grabs my hand and pulls me inside.
I tell the receptionist Gerard's here with me and we begin walking though the blindingly white corridors towards Frank's room in silence, our fingers still entwined.
We walk for what feels like longer than I'm sure it actually is, but it's still too short all the same. My stomach is writhing uncomfortably; what if Frankie doesn't want to see Gerard? What if he yells at him or bursts out crying? I couldn't bear the look on Gee's face...
We reach the door of his room and I pull Gerard to a halt.
'This is his room, Gee,' I say quietly. Gerard looks straight into my eyes, his green orbs wide and panicked.
'Gee?' I ask. He swallows.
'Mikey I-I can't, I can't go in....there. I just I, I don't know, I can't.' I reach out to Gerard and encased him in my skinny arms.
'Ssshh, I know Gee, I know. You don't have to go in if you don't want to.' I try my best to comfort my frightened brother but I begin to feel his body shake. I pull back to look at him and he's definitely crying, his eyes wide and overflowing, lips quivering and he's making small whimpering noises as his body shakes.
'Hey, hey, come on, you don't need to cry.' I take my hand off his waist and wipe his eyes as some stray tears begin to fall. He looks down, shielding his face from me.
'W-what if he...doesn't want t-to see me?' he asks. I tuck his hair behind his ear, gently touching his chin and pulling his head up so he's staring straight into my eyes.
'Then you wait. He'll want to see you eventually Gee, he will. I promise, okay?' The timid nod he gives me makes my heart ache. I sigh deeply and put one of my hands out on the door handle, pushing it open and taking Gee inside with me. He looks slightly panicked but doesn't pull away from me as I lead him next to Franks bed. His eyes are wondering around the room, observing everything frantically and avoiding looking anywhere near Frank.
'Gee, you're gonna have to look at him eventually,' I inform him. He looks fearfully into my eyes when we both hear a squeak.
'G-G-Gerard-d?' Frank questioned timidly. Gerard looked down at Frank, grimacing at the sight of the tubes in his wrist.
'H-hey Frankie.' Frank tenses at the nickname.
'P-please just, don't call me that.' Gerard's expression flashes upset for a moment before he covers it up and agrees. The tense silence that descends is nearly unbearable, my palms beginning to sweat. I need to get out.
'I, I'm just gonna...go grab a drink, you guys want anything?' Gerard mumbles a 'coffee?' and Frank a 'water.' I go to the door and turn back to look at them, seeing Gerard's back and Frank giving me a pleading look. I mouth I'm sorry and rush out the door, closing it behind me  little louder then intended.

Gerard's P.O.V 

I stare down at Frank as he stares back. The silence is eating away at my eardrums, the tension unbearable. My heart beating frantically in my chest, palms sweating as I become absorbed in Franks tired, brown eyes.
'Frank I, I'm sorry. I really, really am but I think you...' I swallowed as my throat went dry, the sound painfully loud in the silence.
'You think I what, Gerard?' Frank asked bluntly, voice strained. My heart sped up.
'I think you need to talk to....someone.'
'What do you mean by someone?' Frank asked, a very slight tint of anger to his words.
'I mean like a...a counsellor or psychiatrist or something.' I immediately duck my head, not wanting to see the look on Franks face.
'Do you think I'm crazy or something?!' Frank asked, gaining his full vocal capacity, definite anger present in his tone. I winced.
'You tried to kill yourself,' I muttered, barely more than a whisper.
'What was that?!' Frank all but yelled. I snapped. I whipped my head up, heart beating faster, breath speeding up, and yelled, 
'Goddammit, Frank! You tried to kill yourself!' 
'Only because of you!' I stood there, staring down at him, heart beating viciously in my chest.
'Don't you dare say that Frank, don't you dare! I didn't ask you to slit your wrists!'
'Oh, we'll that's alright then!' he yells, 'Just keep on kissing your boyfriend in front of me when you know I'm in  love with you, its fine. No, wait, he's not even your boyfriend, is he? He's your BROTHER! Because you're sick Gerard, sick. Both of you!' I freeze, staying deathly silent and staring straight at Frank, watching his brown orbs turn form angry to panicked and horror-stricken. I have nothing to say, I can't think of anything to say, I'm just staring into Franks eyes, my own beginning to water at his hurtful words which have began to rake a dagger through my chest. I thought of all people Frank, little Frankie, my best friend, would understand.
'G-Gerard, I-I didn't mean-'
'You'll never understand, never,' I interrupt him, running from the room and mindlessly down the corridors, a single tear cascading down my ghost like cheeks.