Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > Devotion
Chapter 2: Discovery
By: Katryn Parker
----
Disclaimer: OH CRAP! I forgot to inform you that I do not own Naruto, just in case you were wondering...lol.
----
A/N: Inner Sakura will now be in bold.
----
WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS EXTREMELY SERIOUS CONTENT. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION.
----
Konoha was a buzz of gossip and excitement today. The word had just gotten out.
Their beloved medic-nin, Haruno Sakura, was being released from the hospital.
It was still a mystery as to what had happened to her and why she'd been hospitalized so long. Even the shinobi were out of the loop; all that they knew was that the village was under threat of Orochimaru again.
Luckily, another thing that nobody knew was that Kakashi had already escorted her home.
"We'll have to randomize where she's staying," Tsunade said seriously to Kakashi, Naruto, and Amarante as they sat in her office once again, "It'll be harder for Uchiha to find her that way."
All three of them nodded in agreement. "So who's first?" Naruto asked.
"She's actually requested to stay with Kakashi first..." the Hokage explained.
Kakashi glanced up, visible eyebrow raised. Sakura was going to be alone with him...in his own house... Damn those Icha Icha Books! he cursed silently.
Tsunade continued. "...so you'll be taking her from the hospital to your own apartment as soon as she's released." The older woman glared at him. "You don't even want me to explain the consequences if she gets hurt again."
Kakashi just nodded, the same relaxed expression remaining on his face. Naruto looked with wide eyes between the Hokage and the older man...
"Go on now. Sakura's waiting."
"So is there anything I can get for you?" Kakashi asked as Sakura sat down on the couch and looked around.
"It's not like I'm hurt anymore...I can get things on my own, thanks," she said, slightly annoyed. She turned towards him, a scowl on her face as she gestured towards the bookshelf. "Don't you read anything other than Icha Icha Books?"
"No."
Sakura just shook her head. It seemed like nothing could phase her ex-sensei...
Except that he had seemed so angry back at the hospital. She'd seen the anger in his obsidian eye, his fists clenched at his sides...a tingly sensation stirred in her abdomen and she quickly stopped thinking of that, forcing herself to return to the fact that the subject of these thoughts didn't read anything but porno books. Said subject sat down in a chair across from her, the newest of his favorite series in hand.
"Sensei?" she said quietly.
"It's just Kakashi now, Sakura," he said, glancing up at her, "The minute you became a jounin, we became equals...you remember that."
"Hm," she acknowledged. She did remember that. "Anyway...Kakashi."
"Yes?"
"Did I do anything over the two weeks that I was unconscious?"
She thought he saw him stiffen a little and she frowned. Is that a blush I see...?
"You had lots of nightmares," he answered calmly, "You beat the shit out of Naruto a couple of times."
She snorted. "Too bad I couldn't..."
Silence.
Kakashi spoke up after a few minutes. "Too bad you couldn't what?"
He glanced up from his book once again to see tears streaming down her face. She'd pulled her legs in and was sobbing into her knees at that moment. "Sakura..." He stood up and walked over to the couch, cursing Sasuke in his mind. Stupid boy...
"Why'd I let him touch me like that?" she choked out as Kakashi gathered her into his arms. The mentor he had him directed him from there.
"Just don't think about it," he murmured, starting to rock her awkwardly.
----
"Sensei?"
"Yes, Sakura?"
She looked down into the water that flowed beneath the bridge that Team 7 had always met at, shaking her head. "I miss Sasuke and Naruto."
"Me too," he said silently. The girl hadn't been his student for four years...and now she was eighteen, tall, beautiful, and a competent chuunin. She'd been training with him for a few weeks in preparation for the jounin exams.
She glanced up at him in surprise. "You miss them?"
"Why the surprise?" He was now officially distracted from his book. She'd caught him off guard...of course he missed his former students...
"I just...didn't think you cared that much," she admitted, blushing, "I mean, when I approached you about training for the exams, it was the first time I'd had a real conversation with you since Naruto left with Jiraiya. It seemed like...like you didn't care for us."
He slipped his book back into his pocket and moved closer to her, a frown visible on his face. "Of course I care for you and the boys," he said firmly, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder, "You were my students...my friends."
"And everyone knows your in desperate need of those," Sakura teased, grinning at him.
----
"I trusted him..." Sakura sniffled, wiping her nose on the back of her hand. Kakashi reached over and grabbed a tissue quickly, handing it to her. "Thanks...I just...I trusted him up until..."
She broke into a fresh wave of tears. Kakashi sighed, shaking his head. "Remember Sakura, it wasn't the Sasuke that we knew."
"Yeah, I know...it still hurts though..." She sucked in a fierce breath and wiped off her eyes. "I hate to be like this."
"It's to be expected."
"Yeah, I know that too."
"Well then don't be ashamed."
She looked up at the older man from her place on his shoulder, cursing the mask that he wore for hindering her ability to see his expressions. I wonder if he's feeling the same thing I am...
Aren't you just dying to see what's under that mask?
Sakura rolled her eyes. Inner Sakura hadn't spoken up since she'd been in the hospital. Of course I'm dying to see what's under that mask... she replied.
You could ask him right now...he would probably do it just to make you feel better! Inner Sakura said, cackling.
That's a good idea...
"What is it?" Kakashi said, looking at her.
Sakura blushed fiercely, realizing that she'd just been staring at him. "Uh...it's nothing...sorry..."
He got up, moving her back to her own space on the couch. "Well, since you seem to be feeling better, I'm going to go have a shower." For some reason, this made her blush, but he didn't seem to notice. "If you need anything, scream."
"Mm," she acknowledged, hiding her face. Wouldn't you like to know what's under that mask...? Inner Sakura said gleefully. Sakura frowned, cursing that other side of her.
It's not like I'm going to spy on him. He's taking good care of me and it wouldn't be right for me to do that.
You know you want to.
Yes, I think I've determined that already.
Aw, fine...you're such a bore.
Sorry.
----
Kakashi sighed as he walked away from the pink-haired girl, thinking of how strong she'd been before. The girl had changed so much, all because of Sasuke...
It wasn't Sasuke! he told himself angrily. Of course he knew that it was all to make him feel better...what had happened to Team 7? What had he done wrong to make them all leave? Sasuke had been a complete failure...Naruto had gone off with another teacher...and Sakura had eventually followed her friends. And what had Kakashi done? He'd just sat around, continuing the missions that Tsunade would assign him and reading his damn books.
On another note, Sakura...something about his feelings for Sakura had changed. Was he really having strong feelings for her, or had he just gone too long without sex...needless to say, it was becoming a hindrance to taking care of her. They'd gone through too much together for him to betray her trust now.
He took off his mask and let the cool air touch his face. It wasn't even natural anymore...the piece of cloth that hid his features had become like a second skin to him.
Of course, he didn't know that someone was watching him.
----
Sakura quickly learned that there was nothing to do around Kakashi's house, and the option of conversation was out of the question - Kakashi was still in the shower. Ignoring the outbursts of Inner Sakura, the kunoichi made her way around the small apartment, delicately picking up pictures that interested her and running her fingers over the furniture. I'll be here pretty often...why not make myself at home?
Kakashi didn't have much at his home. The living room consisted of a bookshelf full of porno with a few pictures on top, a couch, a small table, and some chairs. The kitchen was on the other side of the room, the cupboards filled with non-perishable food and leftovers from restaurants. I guess he doesn't cook...
Down the hall was the bathroom, and at the end was his bedroom. She didn't want to invade his space, so she simply stayed in the main room, looking around. It didn't seem like he had guests very often, but the place was surprisingly clean.
She picked up one of the photographs and ran her fingers over the face of one of the boys in the picture...Team 7, back in the early days. "Sasuke..." she murmured, biting her lip. She didn't know what to think of him anymore. She knew that he'd changed, that the man that had violated her wasn't her old crush...but at the same time, he was the same...this was Sasuke now. And they hadn't thought of a way to dispel Orochimaru from his body.
It hurt so badly to be betrayed by the one you loved the most.
"Sakura," a voice said from behind her.
She jumped, turning towards the voice to see Kakashi. He had a towel in his hand and he was roughly drying his spiky silver hair. "You alright?" he asked.
She hastily put the picture down on it's face, bringing her hands together in front of her. "I'm fine," she said.
"OK." He walked into the kitchen and pulled some leftovers out of the freezer, then proceeded to throw them in the oven. "You don't mind leftover tempura?"
She shook her head, smiling weakly. I want to be strong again...
"Who are they?" she asked, pointing to another picture. Kakashi looked up and she thought she saw a flash of pain in his dark eye.
"They're my old teammates," he said quietly, "They're dead."
That was the end of that discussion...Sakura sat down in the chair across from the couch. I guess this is how things are gonna go from here...
You could always make things more interesting.
Not you again...
Oh, come on...just go up to him and ask to see his face! That's all there is to it!
I doubt that he would show me.
Come on...
"No!" she said out loud. Kakashi looked back from the oven to her, raising an eyebrow. She blushed. "Hehe...it's nothing."
----
"What are you doing?" Sakura asked as she watched Kakashi walk down the hall with a pillow and a blanket in his hands, wearing only a pair of black sweat pants and his mask. She tried to keep herself from salivating. He really is kind of attractive...
Now you're talking.
Hey! Who said you could start barging in on all my conversations!
I am you, stupid.
"I'm sleeping on the couch," he said, throwing both the blanket and pillow on said piece of furniture. "While you're here, you get to sleep on the bed."
She frowned. "Are you sure? I mean, it's already really nice of you to let me stay..."
"It's fine," he said firmly, "And I've already made up my mind. Now go to bed."
She shrugged her shoulders and said goodnight before picking up her bag and walking to the room to see that he had a really nice room. A big bed took up most of the space and a small window let the moonlight in, lighting things up. She smiled slightly when she saw a newer picture of their team by the bed, one that had probably been taken within the past year. She was smiling brightly and Naruto was leaning on her shoulder, grinning. Kakashi was seen bringing a bored eye up to the camera from his book.
"Things have changed," she said to herself quietly.
"Sakura, just look into my eyes and I won't have to hurt you..."
She squeezed her eyes shut as if it would enable her to look away from the scene that was playing out again in her memory.
"Sasuke, this can't be you...what are you doing to me!"
"I want you, Sakura..."
"Please, stay back! I just wanted to talk...it's not supposed to be like this!"
His tongue flicked out, licking his lips hungrily, and Sakura's eyes widened, her voice completely gone as the Sharingan took it's hold on her.
A snake's tongue.
"No!" she gasped, opening her eyes again. The moon shone in comfortingly and she wrapped her arms around herself, rubbing her shoulders.
She walked into the bathroom and switched on the lights, then proceeded to brush her teeth. The girl in front of her gazed back with dark circles under eyes, her skin pale and ghostly, her eyes empty.
She picked up her pajamas and began to take off her clothes.
His hands.
Not so gentle as she would've liked.
She cringed when she saw the bruises covering her chest and hips, tracing her fingers over them delicately only to pull away, remembering the last person to touch them. Her skin was flawed now...her inner thighs ached from what she'd been through, and she winced again as she remember his hands there, his teeth biting into her as if she belonged to him.
She'd thought it would be pure ecstasy to lose her virginity to Sasuke. That was definitely not the case.
Whenever anyone touched her now, she could feel those cold, cracked lips on her skin...all except for her closest friends, nobody could touch her without her jumping away. She kept on looking over her shoulder, thinking that he was there, waiting to hurt her again.
Somehow, she managed to go to bed, closing her eyes and pushing away the images to finally go to sleep.
----
Oh no.
"Sakura...I want you, Sakura..."
She opened her eyes.
He was there.
"Get away from me!" she screamed. He gripped her shoulders, bringing his snake-like face closer to hers. "KAKASHI!"
"He won't hear you...I've already used my Sharingan on him to put him into a trance..."
"NO, STAY AWAY!"
----
Kakashi's eyes popped open to the sound of Sakura's screaming and he was immediately at the door to his room. His eyes widened and he went to her quickly.
She was gripping the blankets on the bed, nearly shredding them with her nails, and thrashing around, kicking her legs as if someone were attacking her. Her eyes were open, but she didn't seem to see.
Kakashi knew exactly what she was dreaming.
"Sakura..." he said loudly, sitting next to her and dodging her feet as she sent kicks towards him. Luckily, her hands stayed glued to the sheets.
"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" she screamed, staring at him. He almost felt guilty as he took a grip on her arms.
"Wake up Sakura!" he said firmly. "WAKE UP!"
She blinked and the sleep cleared from her eyes as she looked around the room. "He was here," she said, panic creeping into her voice.
Kakashi held her shoulders gently, yet firmly. "No, he wasn't. You were dreaming. It's over...it's OK."
She stared up at him for a moment before wrapping her arms around him quickly and sobbing into his chest. He slowly brought his arms up and patted her on the back, stroking her hair as comfortingly as he could. I should just get used to this...
"When is it going to be alright?" she choked out, her entire body shaking.
He sighed. "It's only your first day out of the hospital..." he said, continuing to pull his fingers through her pink locks. "Give it time. It'll be rough, but your teammates will be there for you the whole way through...I'll be there for you."
Sakura slowly calmed herself, taking comfort in the closeness of the protective jounin.
Well, this is nice.
I didn't expect you back so soon.
Hey, you brought me here with your little outburst...he has nice abs. Too bad he's still wearing that damn mask, or I would-
Sakura abruptly pulled away from him, her face burning. It was funny how she could forget her pain so quickly when she was fighting with Inner Sakura, and she quickly realized that it was probably her own way of recovering.
"Are you alright now?" Kakashi asked, his hand still tangled in her hair.
"Yeah, I'm...I'm fine," she said. She flashed him a quick smile, putting a hand on his wrist. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," he said, gazing into her eyes. "Now if you need anything else, just let me know."
He got up to leave and she cleared her throat awkwardly, stopping him.
"Yes?"
"Could you..." She took a deep breath, calming her nerves. "Could you just stay in here? I don't mind sharing the bed-"
"I'll sleep on the floor," he cut her off. "Be right back." She's your student, Kakashi... he scolded himself as he went to go get his pillow and blanket.
Meanwhile, Sakura was back in the room having her own thoughts...
That was nice.
He's my ex-sensei!
He's still a hottie.
Oh...he kind of...no, I'm not doing this. I can't do this. This isn't the time or place.
Then what is the time or place?
How about not right after I've been raped!
Inner Sakura shut up after that. Every time that something serious would come up, Sakura's alternate personality would just disappear.
But the feelings still remained. When he came back to the room and lay down on the floor beside her, bidding her goodnight again, a tingly sensation crept into her stomach, reminding her of what she'd felt for Sasuke all those years ago.
A crush...that's all it is...a crush.
Inner Sakura wasn't even there to prove her wrong.
----
Author's Note: Well, that was much longer than I'd expected...I'm quite pleased, actually. Please let me know what you think!
--Kat
By: Katryn Parker
----
Disclaimer: OH CRAP! I forgot to inform you that I do not own Naruto, just in case you were wondering...lol.
----
A/N: Inner Sakura will now be in bold.
----
WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS EXTREMELY SERIOUS CONTENT. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION.
----
Konoha was a buzz of gossip and excitement today. The word had just gotten out.
Their beloved medic-nin, Haruno Sakura, was being released from the hospital.
It was still a mystery as to what had happened to her and why she'd been hospitalized so long. Even the shinobi were out of the loop; all that they knew was that the village was under threat of Orochimaru again.
Luckily, another thing that nobody knew was that Kakashi had already escorted her home.
"We'll have to randomize where she's staying," Tsunade said seriously to Kakashi, Naruto, and Amarante as they sat in her office once again, "It'll be harder for Uchiha to find her that way."
All three of them nodded in agreement. "So who's first?" Naruto asked.
"She's actually requested to stay with Kakashi first..." the Hokage explained.
Kakashi glanced up, visible eyebrow raised. Sakura was going to be alone with him...in his own house... Damn those Icha Icha Books! he cursed silently.
Tsunade continued. "...so you'll be taking her from the hospital to your own apartment as soon as she's released." The older woman glared at him. "You don't even want me to explain the consequences if she gets hurt again."
Kakashi just nodded, the same relaxed expression remaining on his face. Naruto looked with wide eyes between the Hokage and the older man...
"Go on now. Sakura's waiting."
"So is there anything I can get for you?" Kakashi asked as Sakura sat down on the couch and looked around.
"It's not like I'm hurt anymore...I can get things on my own, thanks," she said, slightly annoyed. She turned towards him, a scowl on her face as she gestured towards the bookshelf. "Don't you read anything other than Icha Icha Books?"
"No."
Sakura just shook her head. It seemed like nothing could phase her ex-sensei...
Except that he had seemed so angry back at the hospital. She'd seen the anger in his obsidian eye, his fists clenched at his sides...a tingly sensation stirred in her abdomen and she quickly stopped thinking of that, forcing herself to return to the fact that the subject of these thoughts didn't read anything but porno books. Said subject sat down in a chair across from her, the newest of his favorite series in hand.
"Sensei?" she said quietly.
"It's just Kakashi now, Sakura," he said, glancing up at her, "The minute you became a jounin, we became equals...you remember that."
"Hm," she acknowledged. She did remember that. "Anyway...Kakashi."
"Yes?"
"Did I do anything over the two weeks that I was unconscious?"
She thought he saw him stiffen a little and she frowned. Is that a blush I see...?
"You had lots of nightmares," he answered calmly, "You beat the shit out of Naruto a couple of times."
She snorted. "Too bad I couldn't..."
Silence.
Kakashi spoke up after a few minutes. "Too bad you couldn't what?"
He glanced up from his book once again to see tears streaming down her face. She'd pulled her legs in and was sobbing into her knees at that moment. "Sakura..." He stood up and walked over to the couch, cursing Sasuke in his mind. Stupid boy...
"Why'd I let him touch me like that?" she choked out as Kakashi gathered her into his arms. The mentor he had him directed him from there.
"Just don't think about it," he murmured, starting to rock her awkwardly.
----
"Sensei?"
"Yes, Sakura?"
She looked down into the water that flowed beneath the bridge that Team 7 had always met at, shaking her head. "I miss Sasuke and Naruto."
"Me too," he said silently. The girl hadn't been his student for four years...and now she was eighteen, tall, beautiful, and a competent chuunin. She'd been training with him for a few weeks in preparation for the jounin exams.
She glanced up at him in surprise. "You miss them?"
"Why the surprise?" He was now officially distracted from his book. She'd caught him off guard...of course he missed his former students...
"I just...didn't think you cared that much," she admitted, blushing, "I mean, when I approached you about training for the exams, it was the first time I'd had a real conversation with you since Naruto left with Jiraiya. It seemed like...like you didn't care for us."
He slipped his book back into his pocket and moved closer to her, a frown visible on his face. "Of course I care for you and the boys," he said firmly, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder, "You were my students...my friends."
"And everyone knows your in desperate need of those," Sakura teased, grinning at him.
----
"I trusted him..." Sakura sniffled, wiping her nose on the back of her hand. Kakashi reached over and grabbed a tissue quickly, handing it to her. "Thanks...I just...I trusted him up until..."
She broke into a fresh wave of tears. Kakashi sighed, shaking his head. "Remember Sakura, it wasn't the Sasuke that we knew."
"Yeah, I know...it still hurts though..." She sucked in a fierce breath and wiped off her eyes. "I hate to be like this."
"It's to be expected."
"Yeah, I know that too."
"Well then don't be ashamed."
She looked up at the older man from her place on his shoulder, cursing the mask that he wore for hindering her ability to see his expressions. I wonder if he's feeling the same thing I am...
Aren't you just dying to see what's under that mask?
Sakura rolled her eyes. Inner Sakura hadn't spoken up since she'd been in the hospital. Of course I'm dying to see what's under that mask... she replied.
You could ask him right now...he would probably do it just to make you feel better! Inner Sakura said, cackling.
That's a good idea...
"What is it?" Kakashi said, looking at her.
Sakura blushed fiercely, realizing that she'd just been staring at him. "Uh...it's nothing...sorry..."
He got up, moving her back to her own space on the couch. "Well, since you seem to be feeling better, I'm going to go have a shower." For some reason, this made her blush, but he didn't seem to notice. "If you need anything, scream."
"Mm," she acknowledged, hiding her face. Wouldn't you like to know what's under that mask...? Inner Sakura said gleefully. Sakura frowned, cursing that other side of her.
It's not like I'm going to spy on him. He's taking good care of me and it wouldn't be right for me to do that.
You know you want to.
Yes, I think I've determined that already.
Aw, fine...you're such a bore.
Sorry.
----
Kakashi sighed as he walked away from the pink-haired girl, thinking of how strong she'd been before. The girl had changed so much, all because of Sasuke...
It wasn't Sasuke! he told himself angrily. Of course he knew that it was all to make him feel better...what had happened to Team 7? What had he done wrong to make them all leave? Sasuke had been a complete failure...Naruto had gone off with another teacher...and Sakura had eventually followed her friends. And what had Kakashi done? He'd just sat around, continuing the missions that Tsunade would assign him and reading his damn books.
On another note, Sakura...something about his feelings for Sakura had changed. Was he really having strong feelings for her, or had he just gone too long without sex...needless to say, it was becoming a hindrance to taking care of her. They'd gone through too much together for him to betray her trust now.
He took off his mask and let the cool air touch his face. It wasn't even natural anymore...the piece of cloth that hid his features had become like a second skin to him.
Of course, he didn't know that someone was watching him.
----
Sakura quickly learned that there was nothing to do around Kakashi's house, and the option of conversation was out of the question - Kakashi was still in the shower. Ignoring the outbursts of Inner Sakura, the kunoichi made her way around the small apartment, delicately picking up pictures that interested her and running her fingers over the furniture. I'll be here pretty often...why not make myself at home?
Kakashi didn't have much at his home. The living room consisted of a bookshelf full of porno with a few pictures on top, a couch, a small table, and some chairs. The kitchen was on the other side of the room, the cupboards filled with non-perishable food and leftovers from restaurants. I guess he doesn't cook...
Down the hall was the bathroom, and at the end was his bedroom. She didn't want to invade his space, so she simply stayed in the main room, looking around. It didn't seem like he had guests very often, but the place was surprisingly clean.
She picked up one of the photographs and ran her fingers over the face of one of the boys in the picture...Team 7, back in the early days. "Sasuke..." she murmured, biting her lip. She didn't know what to think of him anymore. She knew that he'd changed, that the man that had violated her wasn't her old crush...but at the same time, he was the same...this was Sasuke now. And they hadn't thought of a way to dispel Orochimaru from his body.
It hurt so badly to be betrayed by the one you loved the most.
"Sakura," a voice said from behind her.
She jumped, turning towards the voice to see Kakashi. He had a towel in his hand and he was roughly drying his spiky silver hair. "You alright?" he asked.
She hastily put the picture down on it's face, bringing her hands together in front of her. "I'm fine," she said.
"OK." He walked into the kitchen and pulled some leftovers out of the freezer, then proceeded to throw them in the oven. "You don't mind leftover tempura?"
She shook her head, smiling weakly. I want to be strong again...
"Who are they?" she asked, pointing to another picture. Kakashi looked up and she thought she saw a flash of pain in his dark eye.
"They're my old teammates," he said quietly, "They're dead."
That was the end of that discussion...Sakura sat down in the chair across from the couch. I guess this is how things are gonna go from here...
You could always make things more interesting.
Not you again...
Oh, come on...just go up to him and ask to see his face! That's all there is to it!
I doubt that he would show me.
Come on...
"No!" she said out loud. Kakashi looked back from the oven to her, raising an eyebrow. She blushed. "Hehe...it's nothing."
----
"What are you doing?" Sakura asked as she watched Kakashi walk down the hall with a pillow and a blanket in his hands, wearing only a pair of black sweat pants and his mask. She tried to keep herself from salivating. He really is kind of attractive...
Now you're talking.
Hey! Who said you could start barging in on all my conversations!
I am you, stupid.
"I'm sleeping on the couch," he said, throwing both the blanket and pillow on said piece of furniture. "While you're here, you get to sleep on the bed."
She frowned. "Are you sure? I mean, it's already really nice of you to let me stay..."
"It's fine," he said firmly, "And I've already made up my mind. Now go to bed."
She shrugged her shoulders and said goodnight before picking up her bag and walking to the room to see that he had a really nice room. A big bed took up most of the space and a small window let the moonlight in, lighting things up. She smiled slightly when she saw a newer picture of their team by the bed, one that had probably been taken within the past year. She was smiling brightly and Naruto was leaning on her shoulder, grinning. Kakashi was seen bringing a bored eye up to the camera from his book.
"Things have changed," she said to herself quietly.
"Sakura, just look into my eyes and I won't have to hurt you..."
She squeezed her eyes shut as if it would enable her to look away from the scene that was playing out again in her memory.
"Sasuke, this can't be you...what are you doing to me!"
"I want you, Sakura..."
"Please, stay back! I just wanted to talk...it's not supposed to be like this!"
His tongue flicked out, licking his lips hungrily, and Sakura's eyes widened, her voice completely gone as the Sharingan took it's hold on her.
A snake's tongue.
"No!" she gasped, opening her eyes again. The moon shone in comfortingly and she wrapped her arms around herself, rubbing her shoulders.
She walked into the bathroom and switched on the lights, then proceeded to brush her teeth. The girl in front of her gazed back with dark circles under eyes, her skin pale and ghostly, her eyes empty.
She picked up her pajamas and began to take off her clothes.
His hands.
Not so gentle as she would've liked.
She cringed when she saw the bruises covering her chest and hips, tracing her fingers over them delicately only to pull away, remembering the last person to touch them. Her skin was flawed now...her inner thighs ached from what she'd been through, and she winced again as she remember his hands there, his teeth biting into her as if she belonged to him.
She'd thought it would be pure ecstasy to lose her virginity to Sasuke. That was definitely not the case.
Whenever anyone touched her now, she could feel those cold, cracked lips on her skin...all except for her closest friends, nobody could touch her without her jumping away. She kept on looking over her shoulder, thinking that he was there, waiting to hurt her again.
Somehow, she managed to go to bed, closing her eyes and pushing away the images to finally go to sleep.
----
Oh no.
"Sakura...I want you, Sakura..."
She opened her eyes.
He was there.
"Get away from me!" she screamed. He gripped her shoulders, bringing his snake-like face closer to hers. "KAKASHI!"
"He won't hear you...I've already used my Sharingan on him to put him into a trance..."
"NO, STAY AWAY!"
----
Kakashi's eyes popped open to the sound of Sakura's screaming and he was immediately at the door to his room. His eyes widened and he went to her quickly.
She was gripping the blankets on the bed, nearly shredding them with her nails, and thrashing around, kicking her legs as if someone were attacking her. Her eyes were open, but she didn't seem to see.
Kakashi knew exactly what she was dreaming.
"Sakura..." he said loudly, sitting next to her and dodging her feet as she sent kicks towards him. Luckily, her hands stayed glued to the sheets.
"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" she screamed, staring at him. He almost felt guilty as he took a grip on her arms.
"Wake up Sakura!" he said firmly. "WAKE UP!"
She blinked and the sleep cleared from her eyes as she looked around the room. "He was here," she said, panic creeping into her voice.
Kakashi held her shoulders gently, yet firmly. "No, he wasn't. You were dreaming. It's over...it's OK."
She stared up at him for a moment before wrapping her arms around him quickly and sobbing into his chest. He slowly brought his arms up and patted her on the back, stroking her hair as comfortingly as he could. I should just get used to this...
"When is it going to be alright?" she choked out, her entire body shaking.
He sighed. "It's only your first day out of the hospital..." he said, continuing to pull his fingers through her pink locks. "Give it time. It'll be rough, but your teammates will be there for you the whole way through...I'll be there for you."
Sakura slowly calmed herself, taking comfort in the closeness of the protective jounin.
Well, this is nice.
I didn't expect you back so soon.
Hey, you brought me here with your little outburst...he has nice abs. Too bad he's still wearing that damn mask, or I would-
Sakura abruptly pulled away from him, her face burning. It was funny how she could forget her pain so quickly when she was fighting with Inner Sakura, and she quickly realized that it was probably her own way of recovering.
"Are you alright now?" Kakashi asked, his hand still tangled in her hair.
"Yeah, I'm...I'm fine," she said. She flashed him a quick smile, putting a hand on his wrist. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," he said, gazing into her eyes. "Now if you need anything else, just let me know."
He got up to leave and she cleared her throat awkwardly, stopping him.
"Yes?"
"Could you..." She took a deep breath, calming her nerves. "Could you just stay in here? I don't mind sharing the bed-"
"I'll sleep on the floor," he cut her off. "Be right back." She's your student, Kakashi... he scolded himself as he went to go get his pillow and blanket.
Meanwhile, Sakura was back in the room having her own thoughts...
That was nice.
He's my ex-sensei!
He's still a hottie.
Oh...he kind of...no, I'm not doing this. I can't do this. This isn't the time or place.
Then what is the time or place?
How about not right after I've been raped!
Inner Sakura shut up after that. Every time that something serious would come up, Sakura's alternate personality would just disappear.
But the feelings still remained. When he came back to the room and lay down on the floor beside her, bidding her goodnight again, a tingly sensation crept into her stomach, reminding her of what she'd felt for Sasuke all those years ago.
A crush...that's all it is...a crush.
Inner Sakura wasn't even there to prove her wrong.
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Author's Note: Well, that was much longer than I'd expected...I'm quite pleased, actually. Please let me know what you think!
--Kat
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