FicWad

UGH Finally, an update! Sorry this is so short.. :/

Sorry I didn't update! My mom said I couldn't use the computer :/

Also, I don't know where the fuck I'm going with this story! It's half way through their vacation and I don't know what I'm writing after this chapter! I have no plot... any ideas?? PLEASE! I want the next ch to be MCR and I don't have any ideas for them... L

~~!~~Another time lapse, it's been three days since the time of the last chapter~~!~~

Brendon's P.O.V.

I'm sat on a rusted swing in a playground outside the hotel. Little tiny daggers are falling from dark clouds, soaking my dirty clothes and stinging my tired, bloodshot eyes.. But I can't bring myself to go back inside. Can't bring myself to face Ryan; no, not after what Spencer and I were doing. Not after Jon caught us; Jon probably already told Ryan and Ryan probably hates my guts. I have been on this playground for almost four days, living off a bottle of water and a few packs of crackers I grabbed. I'm so lame.

I sigh and kick off the ground, letting myself swing back and forth before I kick off again. I felt the tiny daggers of rain turn to heavy bullets and decided to go back inside; just not up to our room.

As soon as I enter the tall building I want to turn and run out again. Ryan is sitting at the far end of the lobby, head in hands, Pete and Gabe are with him, Pete places a comforting hand on his knee. He is saying something to Ryan but I can't hear it.

I keep walking as quietly I can, hoping to slip by unnoticed; but of course, luck is not on my side. But, when is it ever?

Ryan's head snapped up, I saw something I wasn't prepared for. His usually perfect hair was disheveled and tangled as if it hadn't been combed in days, his angelic eyes didn't have a trace of anger, but sadness, anxiety and worry. It breaks my heart knowing I'm the monster that is causing so much pain to this beautiful creature before me. It makes me hate myself with a burning fucking passion from the very depths of hell.

Ryan dropped his head and I looked away.. But not too early to see Pete motioning for me to come over.

I very hesitantly made my way over, my heart about to burst out of my chest; but hey, at least then I wouldn't have to deal with this situation, yeah?

Gabe stood and roughly shoved me down into his seat; Ry doesn't seem mad, but Gabe sure does.

Gabe leaned down to quickly hiss in my ear, "You fucking bastard! You're going to apologize to him and if he wants to be done with you, I better not hear you put up a fight. Or else we are going to have a fucking problem." I stared wide eyed as Gabe sauntered away, Pete muttering something to him about being more gentle.

I turned to face Ryan who was now looking back at me; I didn't say anything, I didn't know what /to /say. Ryan sighed and sat up straighter obviously trying to gain some composure.

Ryan's P.O.V.

I sigh and sit up; my head is spinning with agony and my stomach churning with nerves. Brendon had been gone for a little over three days! He didn't bother telling anyone where he was going, I thought he got fucking kidnapped or raped and murdered! I have to get to the bottom of this.

"Where were you?" I asked softly. I waited for Bren to respond.. He didn't. "Look, Jon told me what erm.. Happened with you and Spence," his eyes snapped up to meet mine, he looked as if he was going to pass out "I'm not mad, Brenny Bear. Jon and Spencer told me what uh, what has been going on with you and Spencer. It's no big whoop; I get it -sorta- it's been going on since grade school and it's hard to quit. I don't care. Really, so will you please just relax and talk to me?"

I put my hand over his and he tensed up "Y-you.. sure?" he stuttered before finally relaxing under my touch. I nodded.

"Yes, positive. I just need to know what you wanna do about uhm.. Us."

"I really wanna make it work, Ry" Brendon mewled. "I love you."

I smiled, this is going to be kinda hard knowing that when Brendon looks at Spencer there is going to be lust in his eyes, but I love Brendon, I love him so fucking much and I need to make this work no matter how hard it is.

"I love you too, Brenny Bear." I leaned over and pecked his lips. "Now, where were you?" I asked curiously.

Brendon frowned and his face tinged pink "O-Oh yeah.. I was over a-at the playground about a block away from here.."

My eyes went wide "This entire time?! At night, in the rain, in the pouring rain?!" I snapped. Brendon grimaced and I automatically felt bad for snapping.. Even though I had every right to be shocked by this information..

"Uh sorry.." I muttered.

Brendon's lips turned up into a half smile "It's fine.. And yeah, in the rain, at night. It's no big deal, that's what I do back home.."

Okay, now I'm kinda confused. What the hell could be making Brendon sleep out on a playground every night even when we're home??

"Wait, what? Why?" I asked, I didn't mean to pry, I'm more curious than anything...

The younger boy's face turned red "Oh um.. Promise you wont tell any of the other guys?" this musty be serious, I nod cautiously, wanting to know more.

"Okay.. Erm, well my parents kinda.. They fight a lot and I'm not exactly the perfect son. They ignore me all the time until I do even the slightest thing wrong; and then they yell at me. It's horrible, it's like they take all the anger towards each other out on me." he sighed and I felt horrible about all this, I have a feeling Spencer was his only comfort during this whole situation.

I nod "Is um, you don't have to answer this if you don't want to but.. Erm.. Is that part of the reason for the whole um.. cough Spencer thing..?"

Brendon blinked up at me but I could see the amused smile pulling at his lips, "Yeah, I guess. He was the only one that ever knew about it.. He helped me deal with it a little. He helped me soooo much. He was the one who helped me get through all the bullies at school, helped me when I was struggling with grades, when my cousin died, and then everything with my parents. He's always been my life line; if I didn't have him I'd probably be, um, dead.." Brendon's lips turned down into a frown and his eyes were glistening with tears from all the bad memories.

I wrapped him up in a huge embrace and kissed his forehead as he hugged me back. After about a minute of him crying into my chest, staining my shirt with tears, he pulled back and continued "And somewhere along the way we.. We I dunno no what happened really, I knew I loved him so much more then a friend and I told him.. He said he felt the same. That was in like fifth grade. How crazy, all that in the fifth grade. Seems so impossible now." he sighed.

I stroked his hair and planted a light kiss on his plush lips, "Just don't forget I love you Brenny Bear, I'll always be here for you if you need me."

He smiled at me, I smiled back. Then I realized he hadn't eaten in like three days, "Uhm Brendon? I think we should get some food in your system.." he nodded and we stood and made our way to the dining hall, hand in hand.