Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Revealing the Truth Hurts
First Kiss
3 reviewsRyan wants to try, even if Bren is somewhat unwilling. But then one action changes all that.
1Exciting
Chapter 2
Ryan’s POV
“Short brown hair, olive skin tone, 5’8” on a bad day,” Brendon said those words. Bren said the same words to me over AIM. No, this wasn’t possible. Brendon had to be a hacker or something. Or maybe he’s her brother and he’s fucking with me. Bren is a girl. She has to be. There’s no way in hell she’s not. I just kept shaking my head and Brendon sighed, “I knew this would happen.”
“You knew what would happen? This is nothing. You’re her brother or cousin or something. And you’re going to yell like… ‘SURPRISE!’ and she’s going to come up behind you. It’s all just… a joke. Nothing’s happening,” I laughed a little awkwardly. There was no way that he was Bren. Nope. No way. He was Brendon, the guy who’s computer hates him. That’s it.
He let out a dramatic sigh, “God dammit, Ryan. I knew this would happen, but I at least thought you’d be more mature about it. I am Bren Urie. I am 23 years old. You are 26. You work at a computer repair shop, you don’t know how to play any instruments except for a few lessons when you were younger on the piano. You don’t care about politics because they bore you to death. You told me you had two girlfriends and that you lost your virginity to the second one—”
I pursed my lips, “That’s not true.”
“Which part?”
“I’ve uh… Never… had a girlfriend before…” I smiled weakly.
He let out another dramatic sigh, “That’s beside the point, Ryan. Bren, aka me, tunes guitars for a living down at the store on Main Street. I’ve been playing guitar for 13 years. I offered to teach you how to play, which you told me to stop later because you couldn’t get a handle on it. You asked to be my boyfriend and I took a while to respond because I was feeding my dog. Do I need to go on?”
I fell backward onto my ass and stared up at him. No, just no. This was not possible. There was no way that this was Bren, “But… But… Bren’s… a gi…” and that’s when it hit me. ‘She’ never told me ‘she’ was a girl. I just assumed this entire time. So that means… That means… “You… You’re Bren…” my voice cracked.
“Yeah, I’m Bren. It’s so nice to see that I was right about all of this. You can just block me on AIM or whatever. I don’t have time for this,” he turned to leave. I wanted to jump up and run after him. But what was I going to do? I’m not attracted to guys. I never have been. Well, I mean… I guess Brendon is attractive if I think about it. But I can’t imagine kissing him or touching him. It just doesn’t work in my brain. I’m straight. Maybe I should talk to Spencer.
But first… I willed my limbs to work and I pushed myself off the ground. I ran after him and grabbed his arm, “Bren, wait!” he turned around (probably because I was holding his wrist) and looked at me. I hesitated, “I’m not gay. But… I mean… I can try. I fell in love with your personality, didn’t I?” I had never told Bren that, but it was the truth. I fell in love with him because of who he was, not what he looked like. I supposed that could come later, right?
He chuckled, but I could see the sadness in his eyes, “Some people prefer penis over vagina. You’re not one of those people. And I should have known that you thought I was a girl. Fuck, I did know. But I didn’t say anything. I didn’t because I was too busy falling for you. I fell for your looks the very first time I saw you in this store. But I’m not going to just wait around for you to find me attractive, when you obviously don’t like the idea of another guy’s penis.”
“But I can! If you give me a chance, I can!”
He laughed, “Give you a chance? So you can, what? Break my heart when you see my penis for the first time? So you can poke it and decide that that’s not what you want? No thanks. I don’t know why I let this go on for a year when I clearly knew who you were and you didn’t know who I was. You never even asked. You just assumed. So I did this to myself. You’re not going to end up gay, it’s just—” I cut him off by moving closer and pressing my lips to his. Now, I didn’t want to tell him that that was my first kiss, but it was. I so wasn’t ready to kiss a guy. But I’d lose him if I didn’t show him that I was willing to try. As I was kissing him, though, I liked it. It was… nice. I’m not saying that I was ready for sex already, but the kiss was nice. I could do that.
So I pulled away and placed my free hand to my lips, “I…”
He snatched his arm away from me, “Fuck you. Every time you smiled at me, every time you gave me this coy look, and just… every time you fucking looked at me, I fell harder. And now you’ve kissed me, and I fell just a little harder. Are you trying to make this harder on me?”
“I liked it!” I yelled in his face. He took a step back in shock. Yeah, I was in shock too. I wasn’t expecting to like it. In general, I wasn’t expecting to like kissing a guy. But he wasn’t just any guy, though. He was… He’s Bren. He’s my Bren.
He finally managed to find words. He laughed a little, ending it with a smile that reached his beautiful brown eyes, “I uh… So you… You are… willing to try?”
“As long as you don’t rush me, yeah. I’m willing to try. I mean, I wasn’t ready to kiss you yet, but I did, and I liked it. So I want to do this… with you. So let me.”
“But the first thing you said was that you weren’t gay.”
“I’m not. But I’m willing to… become gay?”
He laughed a little, “It would be a nice thing to put in my about me on facebook ‘Turned a straight guy gay,’” he smirked and leaned over to kiss my forehead, “Okay, I’ll let you try. But if this doesn’t work out…” he paused and I was worried for a second. But he placed his fingers below my chin and tilted my head up, “You’re taking the blame,” and I smiled, nodding along to that. I was okay with that. As long as he’d let me try. I leaned up and pressed a soft peck to his lips and he smiled.
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A/N: I'M BORED. DON'T JUDGE ME! But yes, this is up... a day early? Yes, yes it is. But uh, yeah, here you go. Please rate and review. I hope you enjoyed~
Ryan’s POV
“Short brown hair, olive skin tone, 5’8” on a bad day,” Brendon said those words. Bren said the same words to me over AIM. No, this wasn’t possible. Brendon had to be a hacker or something. Or maybe he’s her brother and he’s fucking with me. Bren is a girl. She has to be. There’s no way in hell she’s not. I just kept shaking my head and Brendon sighed, “I knew this would happen.”
“You knew what would happen? This is nothing. You’re her brother or cousin or something. And you’re going to yell like… ‘SURPRISE!’ and she’s going to come up behind you. It’s all just… a joke. Nothing’s happening,” I laughed a little awkwardly. There was no way that he was Bren. Nope. No way. He was Brendon, the guy who’s computer hates him. That’s it.
He let out a dramatic sigh, “God dammit, Ryan. I knew this would happen, but I at least thought you’d be more mature about it. I am Bren Urie. I am 23 years old. You are 26. You work at a computer repair shop, you don’t know how to play any instruments except for a few lessons when you were younger on the piano. You don’t care about politics because they bore you to death. You told me you had two girlfriends and that you lost your virginity to the second one—”
I pursed my lips, “That’s not true.”
“Which part?”
“I’ve uh… Never… had a girlfriend before…” I smiled weakly.
He let out another dramatic sigh, “That’s beside the point, Ryan. Bren, aka me, tunes guitars for a living down at the store on Main Street. I’ve been playing guitar for 13 years. I offered to teach you how to play, which you told me to stop later because you couldn’t get a handle on it. You asked to be my boyfriend and I took a while to respond because I was feeding my dog. Do I need to go on?”
I fell backward onto my ass and stared up at him. No, just no. This was not possible. There was no way that this was Bren, “But… But… Bren’s… a gi…” and that’s when it hit me. ‘She’ never told me ‘she’ was a girl. I just assumed this entire time. So that means… That means… “You… You’re Bren…” my voice cracked.
“Yeah, I’m Bren. It’s so nice to see that I was right about all of this. You can just block me on AIM or whatever. I don’t have time for this,” he turned to leave. I wanted to jump up and run after him. But what was I going to do? I’m not attracted to guys. I never have been. Well, I mean… I guess Brendon is attractive if I think about it. But I can’t imagine kissing him or touching him. It just doesn’t work in my brain. I’m straight. Maybe I should talk to Spencer.
But first… I willed my limbs to work and I pushed myself off the ground. I ran after him and grabbed his arm, “Bren, wait!” he turned around (probably because I was holding his wrist) and looked at me. I hesitated, “I’m not gay. But… I mean… I can try. I fell in love with your personality, didn’t I?” I had never told Bren that, but it was the truth. I fell in love with him because of who he was, not what he looked like. I supposed that could come later, right?
He chuckled, but I could see the sadness in his eyes, “Some people prefer penis over vagina. You’re not one of those people. And I should have known that you thought I was a girl. Fuck, I did know. But I didn’t say anything. I didn’t because I was too busy falling for you. I fell for your looks the very first time I saw you in this store. But I’m not going to just wait around for you to find me attractive, when you obviously don’t like the idea of another guy’s penis.”
“But I can! If you give me a chance, I can!”
He laughed, “Give you a chance? So you can, what? Break my heart when you see my penis for the first time? So you can poke it and decide that that’s not what you want? No thanks. I don’t know why I let this go on for a year when I clearly knew who you were and you didn’t know who I was. You never even asked. You just assumed. So I did this to myself. You’re not going to end up gay, it’s just—” I cut him off by moving closer and pressing my lips to his. Now, I didn’t want to tell him that that was my first kiss, but it was. I so wasn’t ready to kiss a guy. But I’d lose him if I didn’t show him that I was willing to try. As I was kissing him, though, I liked it. It was… nice. I’m not saying that I was ready for sex already, but the kiss was nice. I could do that.
So I pulled away and placed my free hand to my lips, “I…”
He snatched his arm away from me, “Fuck you. Every time you smiled at me, every time you gave me this coy look, and just… every time you fucking looked at me, I fell harder. And now you’ve kissed me, and I fell just a little harder. Are you trying to make this harder on me?”
“I liked it!” I yelled in his face. He took a step back in shock. Yeah, I was in shock too. I wasn’t expecting to like it. In general, I wasn’t expecting to like kissing a guy. But he wasn’t just any guy, though. He was… He’s Bren. He’s my Bren.
He finally managed to find words. He laughed a little, ending it with a smile that reached his beautiful brown eyes, “I uh… So you… You are… willing to try?”
“As long as you don’t rush me, yeah. I’m willing to try. I mean, I wasn’t ready to kiss you yet, but I did, and I liked it. So I want to do this… with you. So let me.”
“But the first thing you said was that you weren’t gay.”
“I’m not. But I’m willing to… become gay?”
He laughed a little, “It would be a nice thing to put in my about me on facebook ‘Turned a straight guy gay,’” he smirked and leaned over to kiss my forehead, “Okay, I’ll let you try. But if this doesn’t work out…” he paused and I was worried for a second. But he placed his fingers below my chin and tilted my head up, “You’re taking the blame,” and I smiled, nodding along to that. I was okay with that. As long as he’d let me try. I leaned up and pressed a soft peck to his lips and he smiled.
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A/N: I'M BORED. DON'T JUDGE ME! But yes, this is up... a day early? Yes, yes it is. But uh, yeah, here you go. Please rate and review. I hope you enjoyed~
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