FicWad

Sorry to put this into the MCR category but i would really appreciate some feedback on this original song by me (written whilst listening to MCR) Much appreciated.
Judged by her peers
Your empty words of salvation
Falling on the deafest of ears
Trapped in her word of self destruction

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
There's no more room in heaven
No more room in hell

Society tells the sweetest lies
Once you're dead and gone
No one pays attention , opens they're eyes
Until you return to the nothing you came from

Heart monitor beats to the song
The sweet lullaby singing her to the afterlife
An example of another “straight a student” gone wrong
No body knows why

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
There's no more room in heaven
No more room in hell

Now what would you say?
What the hell would you think?
If I told you id put cyanide
In my final drink

And as I tell you this story
I breath my last breathe
I leave you my legacy
And welcome sweet death.

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
There's no more room in heaven
No more room in hell

Would you count each grain of sand on this beach ?
Pick a petal from every rose on this earth ?
Cary the burdens of a thousand broken men?
Just to show how much her life is worth

So clean up the blood and the bottle of pills
Step around the dead body that fell from the ledge
Forget about that person that you may have killed
Because you may as well have just chopped off her head.

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
there's no more room in heaven
no more room in hell

So clean up the blood and the bottle of pills
Step around the dead body that fell from the ledge
Forget about that person that you may have killed
Because you may as well have just chopped off her head.

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
There's no more room in heaven
No more room in hell

Blade to her wrist
(Wrist)
Pills to her lips
(Lips)
Her feet on a ledge
(Jump , jump , jump)

JUMP JUMP JUMP JUMP
JUMP JUMP JUMP JUMP
JUMP JUMP JUMP JUMP
JUMP JUMP JUMP JUMP

And if she took a blade to her wrist
A bottle of pills to her lips
Balancing on the edge of a building
If she just stopped breathing
Her heart stopped beating

What if she pulled that trigger
Killed the monster deep within her
Carried by the wind as she fell
There's no more room in heaven
No more room in hell