FicWad

A/N: Thanks to triquetriperson, my only reviewer. :)

Chapter Four: Minister of Fools

/Blah/: Thoughts

"Perfect." He stood and stretched. "Right then. I have a question. Just how bad is the whole Ministry take-over thing?"

"You want the whole truth? You can't sneeze without them saying you've broken some law or another."

Harry smirked. "Then I think it's time I paid Fudge a little visit."

His new High War Admiral and Primary Advisor grinned evilly at him. "Wonderful."

Harry smirked back at her. "You need an outfit that befits your station, though."

Her expression changed to one of horror. "Oh dear gods, please not the robes! So damn heavy..."

He laughed. "No, I was thinking something more like... This." He waved his wand and performed the spell she had done for him.

She now wore a pair of black pants and a loose charcoal grey sweater that ended mid-thigh. Sitting on her hips was a black belt with all of her weapons and equipment on it, and her wand was in a holster around her wrist that was concealed in her sleeve. A black robe and dragonhide boots and gloves similar to his ended the ensemble, the hood and cloak with the same protections and charms weaved in and only one minor difference; on the back of her robe was a rendering in silver thread of the Rune of Azkaban.


She looked at him through the shadows of her hood and smiled. "Perfect."

He grinned back, showing his teeth. "I couldn't agree more. Now, what's the quickest way to the Ministry?

Ministry of Magic, London, England

He strode confidently into Fudge's outer office and looked at the secretary as she rose, the same time that bile rose in his throat. Umbridge.

"What can I do for you, sir?" she asked in a nasally tone.

In response, Harry removed his glove and showed her the Rune. "I'll be seeing the Minister now."

She stared at him. "What-"

Without another word he brushed past her, Nimi close behind, and entered the Minister's office without knocking. Both the Minister and the man he had been meeting with stood. Shacklebolt.

Harry leveled a glare at Kingsley, and the man shuddered at its intensity though he couldn't see the giver's eyes. "I will be talking to the Minister now, Mr. Shacklebolt. Alone."

The Minister was bright red. Not unusual. Harry tuned out what was being yelled at him and thought to himself... How does he survive with a blood pressure that high? When the man stopped to take a breath, Harry held out his hand, letting them see the Rune. Both men gasped. "Maybe the gloves were a bad idea," he muttered to Nimi. She smirked.

"You- but- what- how-" the Minister spluttered.

Kingsley, to his credit, merely bowed and said "By your leave, Lord Azkaban," before swooping out of the office just as Umbridge walked in, panting. How she got worn out moving from the desk to the inner office, he'd never know.

"Minister!" she squealed. "It's the Lord!"

Fudge scowled darkly at her. "I can see that, Dolores. Get out." The woman left with a hurt expression on her face. Fudge turned to Harry with an obviously false smile. "My Lord, we've been holding the Isle for your return-"

Harry laughed hollowly. "Holding? Take-over would be a better term. And you will address me as either Lord Azkaban or Lord of Caer Azkaban and the Druid Isles, Minister Fudge."

"Of course," Fudge said, the false smile never wavering. "Lord Azkaban, we merely noticed a few problems in your Isle's laws-"

Harry lost his temper.

Harry losing his temper was bad, not good.

Many had been known to run for their hidey-holes at Harry's temper, and later suggest anger management.

A glass figurine of Mickey Mouse broke.

"FUDGE!" He roared. "A FEW PROBLEMS IN MY ISLE'S LAWS? MORE LIKE YOU JUST WANTED TO HAVE ANOTHER PIECE OF LAND TO ADD TO YOUR GODDAMN BRITISH MINISTRY!

"I AM WELL AWARE OF MINISTRY DECREE NUMBER 18492! I KNOW THAT IF YOU OCCUPY A PICE OF LAND FOR OVER FIFTY YEARS, IT BECOMES YOURS IF IT HAS NO LEGAL CLAIM TO IT! AND I KNOW FULL WELL IT HAS BEEN FORTY-NINE YEARS AND EIGHT MONTHS SINCE MY PREDECESSOR'S DEATH!

"I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT! YOU WILL NEVER HAVE MY ISLE, NOT WHILE I CAN STOP YOU! YOU ARE GOING TO PULL ALL MINISTRY PERSONELL OFF OF AZKABAN, AND YOU'RE GONNA DO IT NOW!"

Fudge glared at him, not fully comprehending the situation he was in. "Are you crazy?"

Harry laughed. "No, I am not. According to paragraph four, section c of the Azkabanian Treaty, your Ministry has no right to occupy Azkaban without the current Lord's approval. I realize you found a loophole with that when there was no Lord, but there sure as hell is now." He started to yell again, suddenly very glad Binns had made them study the Treaty. "AND WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER WILL BE THE DAY I ALLOW YOU TO KEEP YOUR GODDAMN TROOPS AND ENFORCE YOUR GODDAMN RULES ON MY ISLAND!"

Fudge gulped, looking slightly pallid, but stood his ground. "Lord Azkaban, your Militia isn't trained enough to handle the prison-"

Harry laughed again. "And whose guards was it that managed to allow DEATH EATER PRISONERS to escape last year? Sure as hell not mine?"

The portly man wiped his brow. "Well- now- See here! We've got Harry Potter in there!" The last sentence was said as though it could somehow save his miserable hide. "We need our people to guard-"

"No you don't. Potter's dead."

The man froze as though he had been shot. "What?" he whispered.

"You heard me. The Dementors got to him. he died in his sleep."

The blustering minister was now prepared. "Well, no more than he deserved!"

Harry sensed Nimi's movement and held up a hand to stop her. "Not here," he whispered. She nodded grudgingly, and stepped back to her position guarding Harry's back.

At Fudge's inquiring look, Harry merely said "A prisoner of Azkaban is given temporary citizenship. You just insulted one of my subjects."

Fuge paled even more. "I- well-"

Harry cut him off. "But that is not what I came here to talk about. I came here to get you to remove your troops. Now." The last word was said so coldly that it wouldn't have been surprising if people's breath clouds started to puff.

Fudge took a deep breath. "Now see here-"

Harry reiged in his temper, and somehow managed not to yell. "I don't know if you;ve met my High War Admiral and Primary Advisor, Nimi. Nimi, would you like to show off your sword?"

She shot Fudge a feral grin and fingered the hilt. "I'd love to."

The Minister chuckled weakly. "No, no, quite all right... Really..."

Harry smiled. "Alright then, I'll expect the troops gone by tomorrow evening. Good day, Minister." He swept out of the room, Nimi following him once more.

HeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConqueror

Luna Lovegood woke up in the Hospital Wing. Only the twentieth day of term, and she had already been in here over twelve times. For some reason, people seemed to hate her.

She smiled at that thought. There was no "for some reason". People hated her because she believed in Harry. Even the teachers seemed to despise her; they took points from her, gave her endless detentions.

And she couldn't help but wonder...

Did anyone care? Wouldn't someone come to rescue her?

Or did she truly need to rescue herself?

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Lord Voldemort was happy.

That was never a good thing for the side of the light, the thought of which, surprisingly, only made him happier. He chuckled, and it grew into a full-blown laugh.

The idiots. Honestly thinking that their savior had betrayed them. Fools.

And Dumbledore at the head of the lot.

"I FINALLY WIN, OLD MAN!" Tom Riddle yelled to the ceiling. "I finally win."

HeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConquerorHeroVillainSaviourConqueror

The man drifted through the greyness, walking with no real destination in mind. Was there a destination to be found in this godforsaken place? He did not know. Nor did he care.

He had cared, at first. He had thought of his family, his friends, the ones that had been gone. He had screamed and kicked and yelled, and tried to go back.

But he could not.

Eventually, all thoughts of escaping his fate had fled, and one face had remained in his mind. "I'm so sorry," he whispered to the specter in his mind for the billionth time. "I failed you."

He had sent him a letter- a last letter, a few days before he had entered this grey place. He wondered idly if he had gotten it. He hoped so, but then again, it had been an old owl that he had asked to deliver it, and he didn't know if the owl had made it.

He didn't know a lot of things.

But he wished he did.

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Harry looked around his new home with awe. The Lord of Azkaban lived in a spacious castle, and being there somehow felt... right to him. It was as though the very foundation of Castle Azkaban sung under his feet.

"You like it?"

He looked back at Nimi's grinning face, slightly embarrassed. "It's wonderful."

She nodded. "I've never been inside before." There was a moment of silence where they admired the castle before Harry sighed.

"I s'pose I'd better talk to General Azback."

Nimi nodded. "I agree. I'll call him." She flipped open a small stud in her ear, revealing it to have a ear bud and cord. Sticking the bud in her ear, she opened the other stud and pulled out a small pickup. "General Azback, please," she said clearly.

There was some static, and then he could vaguely make out a man's voice. "General? Our Lord wants to see you." There was a pause, an answer, and then more static. Nimi tucked the equipment back into her earrings and turned to Harry. "He's on his way."

Harry shook himself out of his daze. "Oh, alright then."

They sat down in a few comfortable old chairs in the hall to wait and, soon enough, there was a knock at the door. Harry stood up to answer it, but Nimi got there first and swung the door open. A tall man with dark blonde hair and bright blue eyes that seemed to twinkle with unreleased laughter stood there looking rather nervous.

"Um... you Stardreamer?"

She nodded curtly. "Come in."

He entered and stood, looking around for a moment before spotting Harry and bowing deeply. "My Lord," he murmured reverently.

Harry sighed. "Do stand up, General. I called you here because it was suggested to me that you might do well as a Prison Warden. What do you say?"

The man looked to him in shock. "My Lord, I-"

Harry sighed heavily. "If I am to consider you for my Council, you shall call me Harry."

The man paused. "But- it would be improper-"

"I insist."

"Alright then... Harry."

Harry smiled broadly. "Much better. Now, I want to know, are you interested in the position?"

The man nodded. "I've wanted nothing more for my whole life. Well, except for a family, but my wife and kids more than fulfill that, so-" he stopped. "I'm blabbering, aren't I?"

Harry shook his head. "No, not at all." He was getting a good feeling from this man, and decided that he would do a great job as Warden. There was just one question to ask.

He hadn't needed to ask Nimi, because he had gotten a glimpse of her mind when he had checked to see if she was lying and seen, in that brief second, her answer. But he didn't want to pry in the General's mind, and instead decided to just ask.

"What is your opinion on Voldemort?"

The man made a face. "He's a bastard. He goes around killing off anyone who opposes him, and many who don't, with no system or reason, just to instill fear."

Harry grinned broadly. "You're hired."

A/N: Nothing important to say... Dumbledore bashing next chapter... yeah.

~Aerin