Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance
My grandfather passed last Friday, so in my depression I wrote this.
Gone.
You hugged me a week before, and told me we’d see each other soon. You told me that you loved me. While you visited I saw no signs of leaving. You were healthy as ever, even eating right. You were smiling, laughing and you seemed fine. The phone call, though, seemed to disagree. Not even a week, Five Days after seeing you, you were gone. Gone. No more hugs, or advice. My mother answered the phone and I knew immediately something was wrong. There were tears, so many tears, and I just couldn’t believe it was true. I hoped you were just sleeping, and they weren’t waking you up. I hoped you were fine, and it was all a misunderstanding. Visiting your house after you left was the worst thing in the world. Opening the door, your scent filled the air. The strangest thing, is that it still felt like my second home. I still felt safe, and I still felt like you were there. I kept expecting you to come out of your bedroom and ask what we were doing, taking your things. I’ll hold onto everything I’ve gotten from your house dearly, but I’d much rather you were still here to claim it. I’m glad to at least have something to look at and remember you by. The memories I have with you I’ll treasure as well. I’ve held in the tears as much as I could, because my mom and brother aren’t taking this well, and I need to be strong for them. I need to be strong, but I’m not sure I can. And right now? My mom is sobbing as she watches home videos with you in them, and my brother is out getting drunk with his friends. I’m locked in my bedroom, trying not to cry. I’m trying to make sense of what happened. I just can’t quite grasp the concept of you being gone. I can’t comprehend the fact that I’ll never ever hug you again. I don’t want to believe it, but I can’t choose to believe it isn’t true. I can’t pretend I’m innocent as far as the way I’ve been handling it, though. When we found out, Gerard went to alcohol, I went to drugs. I said I’d try to be strong, not smart.
I jump in surprise when my phone begins to ring, and slowly answer Gerard’s call, “Hello?”
“Hey Mmmikey. Cayoo pick me up? Iss not a good idea for me to drive.” Gerard slurs.
I grab my car keys, “Yeah, I’m coming, where are you?” I run through the house, pulling on my jacket quickly.
Gerard lets out a drunken giggle, “Hey guyss! Where am we at?”
I sigh and go to my car as Gerard talks to someone.
“Hello?” a vaguely familiar voice asks, “Is this Gerard’s brother?”
“Yeah, I’m Mikey... where is my brother?” I ask, opening the glove compartment in my car and grabbing a few pills from an envelope I’d hidden.
“He’s at my house, I’m Ray...”
I swallow the pills with a large gulp of water, “Where’s your house?”
While Ray gives me directions to his house, I can hear Gerard speaking loudly in the background. When I pull into the driveway, Gerard is outside, hanging onto a taller boy. Once I walk up to them and get closer, I recognize him as Ray.
“Heya Miiikey.” Gerard grins widely.
I sigh, “Hey... get in the car...”
Gerard frowns, “Whatsa matter Mikeeey?”
“Our grandmother’s dead.” I say coldly, causing Ray to frown.
“I’m very sor-”
“Yeah, you’re sorry and he’s wasted, got it.” I pull Gerard to the car, opening the passenger seat and practically shoving him inside, “Put on your seat belt.” I instruct him before slamming the door.
“Mikey...” Ray stands in front of the driver’s side door.
I sigh, “What? What do you want? What could you possibly want? I’ve had a hell of a day, and thanks to you my brother is so drunk he can’t stand.
Ray crosses his arms, “I didn’t get him drunk, he showed up that way. He was driving back from the party, then decided it was a bad idea, so he stopped here to call you.”
“Oh...well sorry.” I try to open the door, but he leans more against the door, “What?”
“I just, really think you need this...” Ray pulls me into a hug.
My eyes widen as I experience shock, and an oddly comforting feeling. I lean into the hug and feel myself beginning to shake as tears form in my eyes. Ray rubs my back gently and holds me as I cry. Gerard climbs out of the passenger seat and walks over, hugging me tight along with Ray.
“Mikes...” Gerard wipes my eyes, “I’ve been a terrible brother... getting fucked up when I should have been helping you...”
I shake my head and sniffle, “I-It’s okay. I-I’m sorry for crying.” I try to stop the shaking, “I-I tried not to, really I did. I-I ne-need to be strong for you a-and momma.”
Gerard shakes his head and pulls me into a tight hug, “No Mikes.. No. You don’t have to be strong for anyone, alright? You can cry, and scream, and set the house on fire if that’s what you need to do. You just let yourself grieve, and strength will come, okay? But I’m gonna stop getting drunk like this, okay? Because what we need right now is each other.”
I sniffle and hug him tight, feeling a hand rub my back gently.
“And if you ever need me, I’m here too.” Ray speaks softly, “You’re not alone Mikey, not at all.”
I sniffle and pull Ray into the hug.
Gone.
You hugged me a week before, and told me we’d see each other soon. You told me that you loved me. While you visited I saw no signs of leaving. You were healthy as ever, even eating right. You were smiling, laughing and you seemed fine. The phone call, though, seemed to disagree. Not even a week, Five Days after seeing you, you were gone. Gone. No more hugs, or advice. My mother answered the phone and I knew immediately something was wrong. There were tears, so many tears, and I just couldn’t believe it was true. I hoped you were just sleeping, and they weren’t waking you up. I hoped you were fine, and it was all a misunderstanding. Visiting your house after you left was the worst thing in the world. Opening the door, your scent filled the air. The strangest thing, is that it still felt like my second home. I still felt safe, and I still felt like you were there. I kept expecting you to come out of your bedroom and ask what we were doing, taking your things. I’ll hold onto everything I’ve gotten from your house dearly, but I’d much rather you were still here to claim it. I’m glad to at least have something to look at and remember you by. The memories I have with you I’ll treasure as well. I’ve held in the tears as much as I could, because my mom and brother aren’t taking this well, and I need to be strong for them. I need to be strong, but I’m not sure I can. And right now? My mom is sobbing as she watches home videos with you in them, and my brother is out getting drunk with his friends. I’m locked in my bedroom, trying not to cry. I’m trying to make sense of what happened. I just can’t quite grasp the concept of you being gone. I can’t comprehend the fact that I’ll never ever hug you again. I don’t want to believe it, but I can’t choose to believe it isn’t true. I can’t pretend I’m innocent as far as the way I’ve been handling it, though. When we found out, Gerard went to alcohol, I went to drugs. I said I’d try to be strong, not smart.
I jump in surprise when my phone begins to ring, and slowly answer Gerard’s call, “Hello?”
“Hey Mmmikey. Cayoo pick me up? Iss not a good idea for me to drive.” Gerard slurs.
I grab my car keys, “Yeah, I’m coming, where are you?” I run through the house, pulling on my jacket quickly.
Gerard lets out a drunken giggle, “Hey guyss! Where am we at?”
I sigh and go to my car as Gerard talks to someone.
“Hello?” a vaguely familiar voice asks, “Is this Gerard’s brother?”
“Yeah, I’m Mikey... where is my brother?” I ask, opening the glove compartment in my car and grabbing a few pills from an envelope I’d hidden.
“He’s at my house, I’m Ray...”
I swallow the pills with a large gulp of water, “Where’s your house?”
While Ray gives me directions to his house, I can hear Gerard speaking loudly in the background. When I pull into the driveway, Gerard is outside, hanging onto a taller boy. Once I walk up to them and get closer, I recognize him as Ray.
“Heya Miiikey.” Gerard grins widely.
I sigh, “Hey... get in the car...”
Gerard frowns, “Whatsa matter Mikeeey?”
“Our grandmother’s dead.” I say coldly, causing Ray to frown.
“I’m very sor-”
“Yeah, you’re sorry and he’s wasted, got it.” I pull Gerard to the car, opening the passenger seat and practically shoving him inside, “Put on your seat belt.” I instruct him before slamming the door.
“Mikey...” Ray stands in front of the driver’s side door.
I sigh, “What? What do you want? What could you possibly want? I’ve had a hell of a day, and thanks to you my brother is so drunk he can’t stand.
Ray crosses his arms, “I didn’t get him drunk, he showed up that way. He was driving back from the party, then decided it was a bad idea, so he stopped here to call you.”
“Oh...well sorry.” I try to open the door, but he leans more against the door, “What?”
“I just, really think you need this...” Ray pulls me into a hug.
My eyes widen as I experience shock, and an oddly comforting feeling. I lean into the hug and feel myself beginning to shake as tears form in my eyes. Ray rubs my back gently and holds me as I cry. Gerard climbs out of the passenger seat and walks over, hugging me tight along with Ray.
“Mikes...” Gerard wipes my eyes, “I’ve been a terrible brother... getting fucked up when I should have been helping you...”
I shake my head and sniffle, “I-It’s okay. I-I’m sorry for crying.” I try to stop the shaking, “I-I tried not to, really I did. I-I ne-need to be strong for you a-and momma.”
Gerard shakes his head and pulls me into a tight hug, “No Mikes.. No. You don’t have to be strong for anyone, alright? You can cry, and scream, and set the house on fire if that’s what you need to do. You just let yourself grieve, and strength will come, okay? But I’m gonna stop getting drunk like this, okay? Because what we need right now is each other.”
I sniffle and hug him tight, feeling a hand rub my back gently.
“And if you ever need me, I’m here too.” Ray speaks softly, “You’re not alone Mikey, not at all.”
I sniffle and pull Ray into the hug.
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