Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Bury The Castle
Kendall’s POV
**
The blankets around me were warm and my legs got tangled, causing me to fall from the bed. The landing was harsh, but not as harsh as opening my eyes was. Everything that had recently happened went through my mind, unfiltered. I was surprised I wasn’t screaming, thrashing, crying, running… I felt like I should be throwing a damn temper tantrum, like a child.
The light was off, but natural sunlight was filtering in through the window. It was stupid, but it was just a reaction. I struggled to my feet and flung myself at the window. I tried to pry it open, as I searched for locks. I was trying to be quick and smart about it but I was desperate, and that desperation showed.
“Morning.” Frank casually cut in.
I laid my forehead against the window and sighed loudly. “I had to try.”
“It’s expected.” Frank muttered. “But I kind of hoped…”
“What?” I spit the words out as I leaned against the window for support. “Did you hope I would immediately fall so in love with you that I would no longer care for my free will, and just forget about my parents’ bloody death? ‘Cause yeah, I might need a few more fucking weeks for that.”
“Well, it’s a good thing we’ve both got a few more weeks then.” Frank lamely joked.
I didn’t laugh.
“You know I’m going to do everything I can to somehow run away, right? You can’t keep me here forever. Eventually I’ll escape, or someone will wander around and hear me screaming. I will find a way.” I opened my eyes and gazed at my reflection in the window. The outside world had never looked better.
“You’re a lot nicer in the middle of the night when the lights go out.” Frank calmly commented. I felt as if he were threatening me though.
“Is that supposed to mean something?” I finally turned to look at him.
It wasn’t the best decision.
He had recently showered, and was wearing nothing other than a towel around his waist. His hair was tousled, and his body fucking perfect. It wasn’t fair. I wanted him to be ugly, so ugly that I felt physically sick every time I looked at him… because every time I thought of him I felt sick. It just didn’t match up in my head when I looked at him though, because he looked so god damn gorgeous.
“Like what?” Frank innocently asked. “I’m just saying that you’re nicer to me when you’re afraid.”
“Does that… are you going to make me go back downstairs?” The panic was still there, just well hidden.
Frank’s eyes burned in to me with an intensity that I didn’t like. It made me uncomfortable and so I looked away, nervously awaiting his answer. “No.” Frank finally spoke. “We discussed that last night.”
“You’re not the most truth worthy person that I know.” I quietly responded. “How am I supposed to believe a word you say?”
“Have I ever lied to you before?” Frank asked, forcing me to think the question over.
Had he? He hadn’t really. He hadn’t been very forthcoming with information but he hadn’t outright lied. He had murdered my parents, but it’s not like I’d asked him if he was a murderer before that.
“I don’t think so.” I bitterly answered.
“I don’t either.” Frank responded. “And I don’t plan on lying to you. That’s no way to start a relationship.”
I felt disgust roll over me in waves. “And killing my parents is?”
“It was a means to an end.” Frank softly commented.
“’It’ was my parents.” I replied, with thorough disgust. He had killed my parents, and I knew it hadn’t completely sank in just yet. I could still talk about it without sobbing. I felt disconnected from the action of them dying. It was the weirdest feeling I’d ever felt- and it confused the hell out of me, but it felt as if it were a form of protection. I couldn’t feel what I needed to feel just yet, and it was like my brain knew that.
“Do you want me to apologize?” Frank asked, sounding puzzled.
“Should I have to ask for a fucking apology?” I asked. “You killed two innocent people. How does that not faze you?”
“It does faze me.” Frank answered. “But it’s the way that things have to be. If more people lived traditionally then this wouldn’t be necessary. Then we wouldn’t have to live our lives in secret. It’s not like we do anything wrong.”
“How is it not wrong to take my rights from me?” These questions needed to be asked, and now that I’d slept I felt more confident asking them. “Of course my parents wouldn’t have accepted that for me. They wanted… they wanted more for me.” Oh no, I was kind of feeling it. I had to fight the tears now.
“I’m giving you a better life.” Frank reached out but let his hand fall back down without touching me. That was a good idea. I was liable to break his fingers if he laid them upon me. “You won’t have to worry about bills, or me cheating on you, or about our kids being safe and loved. They will always have our family, and you will always have me.”
“I don’t want you.” I spit the words out hatefully. “I don’t want you and I don’t want to have kids with you. I don’t want to marry you, and I don’t want you to take care of me. If I could leave you then I would. I don’t care if you cheat. I feel nothing for you besides disgust and hate. I hate you, and I hate that I ever gave you the time of day at that damn starbucls. You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to me!” I let out the deep breath that had decided to hide in my lungs as I let out my longwinded rant.
Frank’s eyes widened and he fell silent, as he simply stared at a spot on the ground beside me.
It seemed like forever had come and gone before he opened his mouth to speak again. “Well, don’t sugarcoat it or anything.”
“I won’t lie to you about how I feel.” I answered softly.
“I don’t want you to.” Frank finally made eye contact with me. “I knew what I was getting in to when I decided that you were the one.”
“I didn’t know.” I whispered, feeling heartbroken. “I didn’t know just what you’d steal from me. I’ve heard of broken hearts, and even getting pregnant with the wrong guy at an early age but… this, well, no one ever warned me about this.”
“Things will be okay.” Frank awkwardly commented. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Will you hurt me?”
“Of course not.” He sounded so sure of himself.
“I don’t believe you.”
“What do I have to do to make you believe me?”
“Promise you won’t make me do anything that I don’t want to do. Promise me that you won’t hurt me if I’m not good.” I was honestly frightened of his reaction towards anything that I did. I fell asleep the other night afraid that I would accidentally kick him in my sleep. I couldn’t live the rest of my life in terror. It was worse than being in an abusive relationship. It kind of was an abusive relationship, just nicely dressed up… or down- depending on how you looked at it.
“What exactly do you think I’m going to make you do, or hurt you over?” Frank asked, obvious confusion taking over his facial features.
“You know…”
“I don’t know.” Frank answered.
“I don’t want to, er- be with you.” I awkwardly replied.
“I know but eventually you will… oh, /oh/.” Frank’s expression took on a look of realization as what I was saying dawned on him.
“Yeah.” I awkwardly looked away, feeling my face heat up.
“Are you really afraid that I’m going to force myself on you?”
“It wouldn’t be that much of a stretch from what you’ve already done.” I reminded him.
God, this was so not early morning talk- though it obviously wasn’t morning from the bright fucking light shining through the locked windows. What time was it? I always slept in but under these fucked up circumstances I was surprised that I woke up at all.
“I honestly do hope that someday you stop hating me.” Frank sighed heavily. “And in the meantime I don’t plan to hold you down and impregnate you. I’m not a monster, despite what you think. I care about you, and I want a better life for you. That’s why I’m giving you this.”
“Can I just- can I be alone?” I was trembling out of anger and fear, and grief. I was overcome with emotions that I didn’t even understand, and even though I’d just woken I was exhausted from feeling it all.
“Yeah, sure.” Frank moved towards his dresser and pulled out some clothing quickly. It was only a few minutes before he was leaving and neither of us said anything else. Once the door closed I let out a sigh of relief. For now he was gone, and I was safe.
I had to figure out what I was going to do though, because I couldn’t live like this forever.
I refused to.
I’d grown up with such freedom. I couldn’t just stand by and watch it all disappear. He wasn’t going to do that to me. No one could.
Now if only I could get his partially naked body out of my mind, and his tattoo’s… He was a bad boy, and that’s why I was initially attracted to him.
I was attracted to a fucking psychopath and now I was going to hell for it.
Lucky me.
**
(Frank’s POV)
My cell phone vibrated, surprising me. The television was up pretty loud so I had to find the remote before answering the phone, finding myself a little relieved to hear my mother’s voice. I didn’t really want any advice from my dad at the moment. I knew acting like him would get me nowhere with Kendall. I didn’t want to be like him anyway. I didn’t want to hurt Kendall anymore than I had to.
“Hi honey, how are things going?” My rock, though she’d already fallen apart many years ago. It was so clear to me, and so horribly heartbreaking. I often wondered what she was like… before my dad. I’d never before had the guts to ask. I didn’t want to hurt her by asking. I caught her staring out the window so many times, as if she was caught in the past. It was painful to see, but much more painful to feel- I was sure.
“Well, she hates me.” I sighed heavily. “But at least she’s talking to me. Well, kind of. That’s a good thing, right?”
“Oh honey, have you tried a romantic gesture? They really are all the rage.”
“Like what? Should I go get her flowers?” I was kind of clueless honestly.
Dad never taught me how to be romantic. It was more like a hunting game, than a courting one.
“Get her flowers. Rent a horror movie that will make her want to cuddle up to you for protection. Have her make dinner with you, or dessert. Improvise honey.” My mom chuckled, “Baking is cute. I watched a romantic movie the other day in which the lovely couple ended up covered in flour.”
“Thanks Mom. I’ll… try that out.” And hope that Kendall wouldn’t kick my ass.
“Tell me how it goes!” This was the most mom had gotten excited about anything in a really long time. It was strange, but it was nice to hear her be happy.
“I love you Mom.”
“I love you too Frank.” And she meant it too. That was something that I’d never questioned.
“Do you ever regret having me?” Until now.
“What? Why would you think that?” There was instant concern in her voice. “Honey, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you so much. You’re my pride and joy, it’s just so hard to see you growing up.” She was crying now, wonderful.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you mom.” I sighed heavily. “I have to go but I’ll call you soon. Don’t be sad, okay? I was just wondering.”
“Okay honey. I love you. Be careful, and be nice.” I knew deep down that my Mom was frightened I’d hurt Kendall. It was as if she thought I had the ability to be a terrible monster… /like my father/. Sometimes I wondered just what he did to her when… Well, I really didn’t want to think about it.
“Love you too.” The call ended and after grabbing my car keys I headed out.
I could do this whole romantic thing… it couldn’t be too hard, right? The people in romantic comedies made it look so easy.
Unfortunately I wasn’t an actor, and neither was Kendall.
This would be brutally realistic, and most likely I’d fail.
But I desperately hoped that years from now we would be able to look back on it and laugh.
**
The blankets around me were warm and my legs got tangled, causing me to fall from the bed. The landing was harsh, but not as harsh as opening my eyes was. Everything that had recently happened went through my mind, unfiltered. I was surprised I wasn’t screaming, thrashing, crying, running… I felt like I should be throwing a damn temper tantrum, like a child.
The light was off, but natural sunlight was filtering in through the window. It was stupid, but it was just a reaction. I struggled to my feet and flung myself at the window. I tried to pry it open, as I searched for locks. I was trying to be quick and smart about it but I was desperate, and that desperation showed.
“Morning.” Frank casually cut in.
I laid my forehead against the window and sighed loudly. “I had to try.”
“It’s expected.” Frank muttered. “But I kind of hoped…”
“What?” I spit the words out as I leaned against the window for support. “Did you hope I would immediately fall so in love with you that I would no longer care for my free will, and just forget about my parents’ bloody death? ‘Cause yeah, I might need a few more fucking weeks for that.”
“Well, it’s a good thing we’ve both got a few more weeks then.” Frank lamely joked.
I didn’t laugh.
“You know I’m going to do everything I can to somehow run away, right? You can’t keep me here forever. Eventually I’ll escape, or someone will wander around and hear me screaming. I will find a way.” I opened my eyes and gazed at my reflection in the window. The outside world had never looked better.
“You’re a lot nicer in the middle of the night when the lights go out.” Frank calmly commented. I felt as if he were threatening me though.
“Is that supposed to mean something?” I finally turned to look at him.
It wasn’t the best decision.
He had recently showered, and was wearing nothing other than a towel around his waist. His hair was tousled, and his body fucking perfect. It wasn’t fair. I wanted him to be ugly, so ugly that I felt physically sick every time I looked at him… because every time I thought of him I felt sick. It just didn’t match up in my head when I looked at him though, because he looked so god damn gorgeous.
“Like what?” Frank innocently asked. “I’m just saying that you’re nicer to me when you’re afraid.”
“Does that… are you going to make me go back downstairs?” The panic was still there, just well hidden.
Frank’s eyes burned in to me with an intensity that I didn’t like. It made me uncomfortable and so I looked away, nervously awaiting his answer. “No.” Frank finally spoke. “We discussed that last night.”
“You’re not the most truth worthy person that I know.” I quietly responded. “How am I supposed to believe a word you say?”
“Have I ever lied to you before?” Frank asked, forcing me to think the question over.
Had he? He hadn’t really. He hadn’t been very forthcoming with information but he hadn’t outright lied. He had murdered my parents, but it’s not like I’d asked him if he was a murderer before that.
“I don’t think so.” I bitterly answered.
“I don’t either.” Frank responded. “And I don’t plan on lying to you. That’s no way to start a relationship.”
I felt disgust roll over me in waves. “And killing my parents is?”
“It was a means to an end.” Frank softly commented.
“’It’ was my parents.” I replied, with thorough disgust. He had killed my parents, and I knew it hadn’t completely sank in just yet. I could still talk about it without sobbing. I felt disconnected from the action of them dying. It was the weirdest feeling I’d ever felt- and it confused the hell out of me, but it felt as if it were a form of protection. I couldn’t feel what I needed to feel just yet, and it was like my brain knew that.
“Do you want me to apologize?” Frank asked, sounding puzzled.
“Should I have to ask for a fucking apology?” I asked. “You killed two innocent people. How does that not faze you?”
“It does faze me.” Frank answered. “But it’s the way that things have to be. If more people lived traditionally then this wouldn’t be necessary. Then we wouldn’t have to live our lives in secret. It’s not like we do anything wrong.”
“How is it not wrong to take my rights from me?” These questions needed to be asked, and now that I’d slept I felt more confident asking them. “Of course my parents wouldn’t have accepted that for me. They wanted… they wanted more for me.” Oh no, I was kind of feeling it. I had to fight the tears now.
“I’m giving you a better life.” Frank reached out but let his hand fall back down without touching me. That was a good idea. I was liable to break his fingers if he laid them upon me. “You won’t have to worry about bills, or me cheating on you, or about our kids being safe and loved. They will always have our family, and you will always have me.”
“I don’t want you.” I spit the words out hatefully. “I don’t want you and I don’t want to have kids with you. I don’t want to marry you, and I don’t want you to take care of me. If I could leave you then I would. I don’t care if you cheat. I feel nothing for you besides disgust and hate. I hate you, and I hate that I ever gave you the time of day at that damn starbucls. You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to me!” I let out the deep breath that had decided to hide in my lungs as I let out my longwinded rant.
Frank’s eyes widened and he fell silent, as he simply stared at a spot on the ground beside me.
It seemed like forever had come and gone before he opened his mouth to speak again. “Well, don’t sugarcoat it or anything.”
“I won’t lie to you about how I feel.” I answered softly.
“I don’t want you to.” Frank finally made eye contact with me. “I knew what I was getting in to when I decided that you were the one.”
“I didn’t know.” I whispered, feeling heartbroken. “I didn’t know just what you’d steal from me. I’ve heard of broken hearts, and even getting pregnant with the wrong guy at an early age but… this, well, no one ever warned me about this.”
“Things will be okay.” Frank awkwardly commented. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Will you hurt me?”
“Of course not.” He sounded so sure of himself.
“I don’t believe you.”
“What do I have to do to make you believe me?”
“Promise you won’t make me do anything that I don’t want to do. Promise me that you won’t hurt me if I’m not good.” I was honestly frightened of his reaction towards anything that I did. I fell asleep the other night afraid that I would accidentally kick him in my sleep. I couldn’t live the rest of my life in terror. It was worse than being in an abusive relationship. It kind of was an abusive relationship, just nicely dressed up… or down- depending on how you looked at it.
“What exactly do you think I’m going to make you do, or hurt you over?” Frank asked, obvious confusion taking over his facial features.
“You know…”
“I don’t know.” Frank answered.
“I don’t want to, er- be with you.” I awkwardly replied.
“I know but eventually you will… oh, /oh/.” Frank’s expression took on a look of realization as what I was saying dawned on him.
“Yeah.” I awkwardly looked away, feeling my face heat up.
“Are you really afraid that I’m going to force myself on you?”
“It wouldn’t be that much of a stretch from what you’ve already done.” I reminded him.
God, this was so not early morning talk- though it obviously wasn’t morning from the bright fucking light shining through the locked windows. What time was it? I always slept in but under these fucked up circumstances I was surprised that I woke up at all.
“I honestly do hope that someday you stop hating me.” Frank sighed heavily. “And in the meantime I don’t plan to hold you down and impregnate you. I’m not a monster, despite what you think. I care about you, and I want a better life for you. That’s why I’m giving you this.”
“Can I just- can I be alone?” I was trembling out of anger and fear, and grief. I was overcome with emotions that I didn’t even understand, and even though I’d just woken I was exhausted from feeling it all.
“Yeah, sure.” Frank moved towards his dresser and pulled out some clothing quickly. It was only a few minutes before he was leaving and neither of us said anything else. Once the door closed I let out a sigh of relief. For now he was gone, and I was safe.
I had to figure out what I was going to do though, because I couldn’t live like this forever.
I refused to.
I’d grown up with such freedom. I couldn’t just stand by and watch it all disappear. He wasn’t going to do that to me. No one could.
Now if only I could get his partially naked body out of my mind, and his tattoo’s… He was a bad boy, and that’s why I was initially attracted to him.
I was attracted to a fucking psychopath and now I was going to hell for it.
Lucky me.
**
(Frank’s POV)
My cell phone vibrated, surprising me. The television was up pretty loud so I had to find the remote before answering the phone, finding myself a little relieved to hear my mother’s voice. I didn’t really want any advice from my dad at the moment. I knew acting like him would get me nowhere with Kendall. I didn’t want to be like him anyway. I didn’t want to hurt Kendall anymore than I had to.
“Hi honey, how are things going?” My rock, though she’d already fallen apart many years ago. It was so clear to me, and so horribly heartbreaking. I often wondered what she was like… before my dad. I’d never before had the guts to ask. I didn’t want to hurt her by asking. I caught her staring out the window so many times, as if she was caught in the past. It was painful to see, but much more painful to feel- I was sure.
“Well, she hates me.” I sighed heavily. “But at least she’s talking to me. Well, kind of. That’s a good thing, right?”
“Oh honey, have you tried a romantic gesture? They really are all the rage.”
“Like what? Should I go get her flowers?” I was kind of clueless honestly.
Dad never taught me how to be romantic. It was more like a hunting game, than a courting one.
“Get her flowers. Rent a horror movie that will make her want to cuddle up to you for protection. Have her make dinner with you, or dessert. Improvise honey.” My mom chuckled, “Baking is cute. I watched a romantic movie the other day in which the lovely couple ended up covered in flour.”
“Thanks Mom. I’ll… try that out.” And hope that Kendall wouldn’t kick my ass.
“Tell me how it goes!” This was the most mom had gotten excited about anything in a really long time. It was strange, but it was nice to hear her be happy.
“I love you Mom.”
“I love you too Frank.” And she meant it too. That was something that I’d never questioned.
“Do you ever regret having me?” Until now.
“What? Why would you think that?” There was instant concern in her voice. “Honey, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you so much. You’re my pride and joy, it’s just so hard to see you growing up.” She was crying now, wonderful.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you mom.” I sighed heavily. “I have to go but I’ll call you soon. Don’t be sad, okay? I was just wondering.”
“Okay honey. I love you. Be careful, and be nice.” I knew deep down that my Mom was frightened I’d hurt Kendall. It was as if she thought I had the ability to be a terrible monster… /like my father/. Sometimes I wondered just what he did to her when… Well, I really didn’t want to think about it.
“Love you too.” The call ended and after grabbing my car keys I headed out.
I could do this whole romantic thing… it couldn’t be too hard, right? The people in romantic comedies made it look so easy.
Unfortunately I wasn’t an actor, and neither was Kendall.
This would be brutally realistic, and most likely I’d fail.
But I desperately hoped that years from now we would be able to look back on it and laugh.
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