Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Homeless
Getting Acquainted.
4 reviewsDifferent sections between Mikey's situations and Gerard's situations. The two brothers seem to be headed in different emotional directions. One, into a dark pit, the other, rising in happiness.
1Original
Just as the sound of Gerard’s car disappeared, Mikey suddenly felt abandoned. So deserted. Sure, Frank was a great guy, but Mikey had only known him for just over an hour. It wasn’t much of a difference with Gerard, but it seemed like he had known Gerard for years now. He missed Gerard.
“C’mon, let’s get you some clothes,” Frank said, walking towards the stairs. Mikey followed him to his and Jamia’s room. The inside was stunning. Each side of the room had a picture window. On the far side of the room was the entrance to the master bathroom. Mikey could see that there was a wide glass shower next to what seemed to be a Jacuzzi bathtub. Frank started to rummage around in his closet, looking for clothes. Minutes later, Frank rose from inside his closet and took out a pile of clothes.
“These are all clothes that are too big for me. People just overestimate my size I guess. They should fit you. I got a couple pairs of jeans in here too, but I can take you to the mall sometime.”
“Oh, no that’s okay. These clothes’ll be fine,” Mikey said, not wanting to take anything more from Frank. He already regretted taking advantage of his wealth. Mikey took the pile of clothes from Frank and stepped out into the hallway to go to his room. He placed the clothes and sifted through them, searching through them. Frank, standing in the doorway, asked,
“What size shoe are you?”
“Uh, 11 I think,” Mikey guessed.
“Hey, I’m the same. Maybe a little bigger. I think I have a pair of sneakers around here.” Mikey heard Frank walk down the hallway and make his way down the stairs. Sighing, Mikey sat down on the bed with a black t-shirt in his hands. The springs inside creaked. He didn’t deserve this. He had never worked hard for anything in his live except for his bass. Frank didn’t even know him. All this generosity was foreign to him. He could have sat for hours regretting have coming to Frank’s house, but Frank himself interrupted Mikey’s thoughts.
“I found a pair!” Frank held up a pair of gray Asics running shoes. Mikey took off his tattered pair of sneakers, brand unknown, and placed the to his side carefully. He took the shoes from Frank and slipped them on. They were slightly bigger, as Frank had led on, but it was nothing a pair of socks couldn’t fix.
“Thanks Frank, they fit perfectly,” Mikey smiled. Frank grinned. Mikey could tell that Frank was happier giving than receiving.
“Oh, and the bathroom is right across the hall. I’ll let you get settled,” Frank said as he left the room. Mikey mindlessly started to fold the clothes he had received. He went through each one, all being about Mikey’s size, carefully folding each sleeve inwards towards the chest. He wondered how many hours he had spent only folding clothes in the orphanage. It wasn’t that he didn’t like the task; it just became tedious. He started to make games to entertain himself while folding. From around the house, echoes and calls were heard from all of the Ieros, including Miles, who at one point, became hungry and started to bawl. Before he knew it, the pile of clothes he originally had turned into neatly organized stacks of clothes. Not knowing what to do, Mikey awkwardly stood up from the bed and looked around the barren room to find any way to busy himself. He smoothed the bed sheets, put the clothes into separate drawers, and evened the pillows out on the bed. There was nothing else to do but go downstairs.
~~~
Gerard drove silently down the highway. Bandit had drifted to sleep in her car seat just minutes before. He knew what was awaiting him at home. Lindsey would question him about everything that had been happening. He would have to reveal his past to her. On his right, the sun had started to set, the orange light of it reflecting off of the vibrant leaves on the trees among the overgrown weeds on the sides of the highway. He felt a little empty without Mikey. Even though he had just found out that they were brothers, Gerard felt a connection with him that he could not describe. He felt a little more complete inside after finding that he had a brother, but more was taken away from him when Mikey left. After what Frank had said about blood test, Gerard was still a little on edge, but he doubted Frank a little. You didn’t need to draw blood for DNA tests… right? He would research at home. Perhaps Frank was just trying to freak him out again. Gerard exited the highway and navigated his way back to Belleville. He reached his apartment building and drove to the parking garage to put his car into dormancy again. He unbuckled Bandit from her car seat and lifted her limp body from the chair. She did not stir. He adjusted her in his arm with difficultly until she started to wrap her arms around his neck, still half sleeping. Gerard shut the car door, locked it, and made his way up the concrete stairs.
Lindsey was waiting on the couch for them. The television was on to a news station, but Gerard could tell that she was not watching it, but thinking about what was to come. She turned her head to face Gerard who had started to go to Bandit’s room to put her to bed. Once he pulled the covers over Bandit, he returned to the small living room and sat down on the opposite side of the couch.
“Gerard…” Lindsey started. Gerard interrupted her.
“Lindsey, I haven’t been entirely truthful to you. It’s nothing horrible, really, it’s actually pretty good. Yes, very good, but this past few days I’ve passed by Mikey, that homeless man, and, you know, these little things happened. I don’t know. I just- one thing led to another and eventually I started talking to him.” Gerard explained how he had met Mikey before he had tried to kill himself. He explained what had happened that day. Finally, Gerard broke the news to her,
“Lindsey, Mikey’s my brother.” Lindsey started blankly at Gerard, seriously doubting Gerard’s statement. Gerard, recognizing the disbelief on her face, revealed all of the information he had pieced together to prove that Mikey was, in fact, his brother. As Gerard explained more and more, Lindsey started to believe that he was Mikey’s brother.
“Oh my god, Gerard, that’s—oh, I’m so sorry we couldn’t take him in.” Lindsey was genuinely regretful.
“No, it’s alright. He’s better off at Frank’s,” Gerard said. He still wanted to be with Mikey, but he was right; Mikey was better off at Frank’s. Lindsey moved herself next to where Gerard was sitting and embraced him.
“I’m sorry, Gerard. I was really distracted by the fact that you missing and got home hurt.” Gerard responded by hugging her back. Lindsey let him go and fingered at his bandages,
“Shouldn’t you change these? You should get it checked out, too.” Gerard unwrapped the bandages while saying,
“It should be fine. It’s doesn’t hurt that much. I just kind of have a headache.” When he revealed the back of his head, Lindsey put her hand to her mouth. The gash on the back of her husband’s head was still open. It was shiny with blood and the hair around it was encrusted with dry blood.
“Gerard, we need to take you to the hospital,” she said frantically, jumping up from the couch. Gerard stood up.
“No, I don’t need to go to the hospital. I’ll be fine. Just wrap my head up.”
“But it could get infected! A concussion even!”
“No, Lindsey, I’ll be fine.” Gerard put his hands on her shoulders. Lindsey recoiled. Not physically, but Gerard could see that her old defiant self, the one who would insist on anything, no matter how much Gerard would argue, was gone. She agreed, and turned away from Gerard to start making dinner. Gerard almost called out to her that he would go to the hospital. He didn’t really want to, but somewhere inside of him, he only wanted to raise conflict with Lindsey just so that he could convince himself she cared about him. Usually Lindsey would have dragged him to the hospital, but why not now?
~~~
Before he knew it, Mikey had traversed his way through the large house to find Frank in the family room. The room seemed to be completely separate from the house in terms of style. The design was mundane, like a common family room found in any middle class home. The floor was covered in a tan carpet and a long sofa stretched across one side of the wall. The only exception to the ordinariness was the television. It was at least 72” and the sound system next to it was impressively silvery metallic though they were turned off at the moment. Frank sat on the couch nursing a micro-brewed beer in his left hand, the remote in the other and was watching the old MTV Unplugged session with Nirvana in 1993. Frank looked up from the television and met Mikey’s face with a grin.
“Here, come sit down!” Mikey walked over and sat down on the leather couch next to Frank.
“You want a beer?” Frank asked, holding up his. Mikey shook his head and mumbled a “No, thank you.” The awkwardness between them was clear, but Mikey could tell that all Frank wanted to do at the moment was to start a conversation. On the television, Kurt Cobain started to sing “Where Did You Sleep Last Night”, Mikey thought, one of the most moving performances of all time. Just after the song was finished, the show ended and one of the pointless MTV reality show theme songs started to play. Frank switched off the television and drained the small amount of beer he had left. He stood up from the couch, exhaling, and offered to Mikey,
“I’m gonna start moving the stuff upstairs down to the basement for the studio. You’re welcome to help me, and last I checked, Jamia said she would finish making dinner in about an hour.” Mikey agreed and followed Frank, yet again, up the stairs into a different room. The room was cluttered with cardboard boxes filled with various different tapes and vinyls and recording materials. Various guitars were standing on their own supports and heavy looking amplifiers and recording machines.
“Here, let’s take these boxes down first,” Frank suggested. Mikey picked up a heavy box of vinyls and started to walk out of the doorway when he realized he did not know where the basement was.
“Uh, Frank, where’s the basement?” Frank picked up two boxes and stacked them on top of each other, blocking his face.
“Oh, I’ll show you.” Frank led Mikey down the stairs and to the family room. Just before the doorway to the family room, Frank opened a door on his left and descended down the stairs. Flipping the light switches as he went, he revealed the massive basement. Boxes were piled up along the wall of one room. Frank placed the boxes with the rest and Mikey followed. The two of them repeated the process until all the boxes in the upstairs room was gone. Frank put his hands on his hips and exhaled.
“Well, this room is done. I think dinner should be ready now.” Frank said and slapped Mikey on the back in good nature.
~~~
Though he had not eaten any at all that day, Gerard was not hungry. He had gone to bed, not knowing what to do. The sun was nearly disappearing behind the old buildings, and just like Gerard’s disposition, his room was slowly growing darker. When Gerard was young, about 12 or 13, he had been forced to go to a psychologist. It was a miracle his grandparents could afford it, but after weeks of talking, Gerard was told he had severe clinical depression. After that, Gerard had refused to go to the psychologist. Deep down, he knew he was depressed. What else could have explained the crippling feelings of hopelessness and occasional private breakdowns? After that, Gerard kept everything hidden. He never displayed real emotion with fear that just like the psychologist, everyone would judge him and even misunderstand him. Everyone assumed he was all right, of course, until his suicide attempt. Even afterwards, Gerard refused to go to a therapist, let alone be put on medication. So today, Gerard was in a deep hole of depression. After everything that had happened, his head hurting, and his untreated psychological disorder acting up, Gerard could not bring himself to do anything. He was lying in his bed, curled up, yet not tired at all. He was wide awake, but he could not even handle standing. At the moment, Gerard could not quite pinpoint the trigger of the sadness, but he what he was experiencing was real, and it hurt. Indescribable, maybe, but as Gerard would describe: a mental pain, yet physically hurting. It would hurt his chest. He would not be able to breathe at times. This would not stop, the paralyzing paranoia would not end, and all Gerard wanted was a drink. One drink. Just as the last beam of light faded away from Gerard’s room, he promised himself a drink just as soon as everyone was asleep.
Gerard waited hours, pretending to be asleep, after Lindsey had settled in bed, and only then had he cautiously gotten up out of bed and dragged himself to the corner of the room. Only tonight, Gerard thought, only one night. He lifted to floorboards and reached down to retrieve a bottle. Any bottle, it didn’t matter. Fortunately for Gerard, the bottle was unopened. Gerard slipped on a thin white t-shirt and his coat. Hiding the bottle in his coat, he crept out of his room, into the hallway, and out the door, all without Lindsey noticing. Gerard felt the wind grab his bare legs as he immediately regretted putting on actual pants. The bottle still hidden in his jacket, he stumbled down the stairs all the way down to the garage level. Inside, it was less cold, but not by much, only the wind had been taken away. Gerard walked over to the third row of cars and to his small Honda. He felt his pocket for his keys, and after confirming their presence, he unlocked the car door and stepped into the passenger seat. Reclining the back of the seat further, he made himself comfortable and popped open the bottle of alcohol. Gerard barely made out the words on the label with the pale lights on the garage ceiling. It was bourbon. Cheap bourbon, but alcohol nonetheless. Gerard wasn’t picky. Just as he brought the cold, glass bottle to his mouth, Gerard rethought about his pledge to sobriety.
~~~
As Frank and Jamia carried on with their conversation with the family at the dinner table, Mikey sat quietly next to Frank, eating their delicious meal of pork chops, mashed potatoes, and a tasty caesar salad. He was not thinking anything at the moment and what caught by surprise when Frank started to introduce him to Cherry and Lily.
“Mikey here is going to be staying with us for a while. Be respectful to him and don’t ask anything of him, okay? He’s our guest.” Cherry and Lily mumbled hellos, a little shy of him.
The dinner went by quickly and soon, Jamia was taking everyone’s plate. Regretting that he hadn’t offered first, Mikey handed his empty plate to Jamia. This was all foreign to him. Was this what a normal family like? The day had no real structure, Mikey thought. There seemed to be no routine, unlike days at the orphanage where meals were at an exact time, lights were out for certain ages, and laundry day was at the same time and same day each week. He liked not knowing what was going to happen. Of course, all of this seemed routine to Frank and his family, but Mikey’s childhood had been so different from theirs. Not knowing what to do, Mikey returned to his room and lay on his bed. In the huge house, sound traveled easily, echoing of the walls. It was usually quiet, and Mikey could hear the strumming of an acoustic guitar and soft singing. It was almost seven, and Mikey had time to kill. He strode down the stairs to find the guitar player, most likely Frank. He found Frank sitting on the couch in the living room hunched over a guitar. Cherry and Lily were in front of him giggling and rolling on the floor. As Mikey came closer he heard Frank singing.
“You said, ‘How may I help you?’
And then I smelt poo.
I looked all around me,
I even checked my shoes.
The burning in my eyes, then I realized.
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is it? I want to know.
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
I smelt something foul; it must be your bowels.
Its kinda demonic you need a colonic
Is that your breathe or did you just fart
Break it down!
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?”
Mikey could not suppress his laughter. Frank was already on the brink of complete hilarity, so Mikey turned around and ran up the stairs and into his room where he broke down in laughter. He had never grasped the concept of a “real” childhood. Of course, he had wished and prayed for a pair of loving parents to adopt him, but since it had never come true, he had never known. Usually, in these cases of self-pity, Mikey would just wallow in his own despair, but the positivity of the house, the friendliness as opposed to the evil world gave him a different outlook. He thought to himself that even though he never got to have a “real” childhood, at least he could have a taste of what it would have been like now.
~~~
Gerard woke in the passenger seat of his car. His head was pounding and he could not lift his head. It seemed as thought bricks were piled up on his body. Eventually, he got himself to sit up. His shirt was covered in vomit and an empty bottle of bourbon lay on the ground. Gerard stared at the ground, attempting to recollect what had happened. He remembered. These kinds of moments were not uncommon when he was a serious alcoholic, yet, now, Gerard did not regret his decisions. He had drowned his sorrows in the only he liquid he knew that could. Despite his indifference to his obviously budding problem, he did not attempt to hurry to get to work. He would call in sick today. An acidic taste lingered in the back of his mouth. He spat on the ground and stumbled towards the staircase. Judging by the position of the sun, he should have been at work already. Luckily for Gerard, he frequently left for work before anyone woke up. He did not want to face Lindsey or Bandit today. Though it satisfied him to drink, he knew how much it would hurt them. He promised himself that his indulgences would have to be private. He would wait until Lindsey and Bandit left the house. Still sitting on the concrete steps, he drifted to sleep, head leaning against the wall.
A/N Sorry about that weird part with the song. I was in a stupid mood :P Here's the link to the video if you would like:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzVi-hCac8c
Please Rate & Review if you liked it!! So long and goodnight ;D
“C’mon, let’s get you some clothes,” Frank said, walking towards the stairs. Mikey followed him to his and Jamia’s room. The inside was stunning. Each side of the room had a picture window. On the far side of the room was the entrance to the master bathroom. Mikey could see that there was a wide glass shower next to what seemed to be a Jacuzzi bathtub. Frank started to rummage around in his closet, looking for clothes. Minutes later, Frank rose from inside his closet and took out a pile of clothes.
“These are all clothes that are too big for me. People just overestimate my size I guess. They should fit you. I got a couple pairs of jeans in here too, but I can take you to the mall sometime.”
“Oh, no that’s okay. These clothes’ll be fine,” Mikey said, not wanting to take anything more from Frank. He already regretted taking advantage of his wealth. Mikey took the pile of clothes from Frank and stepped out into the hallway to go to his room. He placed the clothes and sifted through them, searching through them. Frank, standing in the doorway, asked,
“What size shoe are you?”
“Uh, 11 I think,” Mikey guessed.
“Hey, I’m the same. Maybe a little bigger. I think I have a pair of sneakers around here.” Mikey heard Frank walk down the hallway and make his way down the stairs. Sighing, Mikey sat down on the bed with a black t-shirt in his hands. The springs inside creaked. He didn’t deserve this. He had never worked hard for anything in his live except for his bass. Frank didn’t even know him. All this generosity was foreign to him. He could have sat for hours regretting have coming to Frank’s house, but Frank himself interrupted Mikey’s thoughts.
“I found a pair!” Frank held up a pair of gray Asics running shoes. Mikey took off his tattered pair of sneakers, brand unknown, and placed the to his side carefully. He took the shoes from Frank and slipped them on. They were slightly bigger, as Frank had led on, but it was nothing a pair of socks couldn’t fix.
“Thanks Frank, they fit perfectly,” Mikey smiled. Frank grinned. Mikey could tell that Frank was happier giving than receiving.
“Oh, and the bathroom is right across the hall. I’ll let you get settled,” Frank said as he left the room. Mikey mindlessly started to fold the clothes he had received. He went through each one, all being about Mikey’s size, carefully folding each sleeve inwards towards the chest. He wondered how many hours he had spent only folding clothes in the orphanage. It wasn’t that he didn’t like the task; it just became tedious. He started to make games to entertain himself while folding. From around the house, echoes and calls were heard from all of the Ieros, including Miles, who at one point, became hungry and started to bawl. Before he knew it, the pile of clothes he originally had turned into neatly organized stacks of clothes. Not knowing what to do, Mikey awkwardly stood up from the bed and looked around the barren room to find any way to busy himself. He smoothed the bed sheets, put the clothes into separate drawers, and evened the pillows out on the bed. There was nothing else to do but go downstairs.
~~~
Gerard drove silently down the highway. Bandit had drifted to sleep in her car seat just minutes before. He knew what was awaiting him at home. Lindsey would question him about everything that had been happening. He would have to reveal his past to her. On his right, the sun had started to set, the orange light of it reflecting off of the vibrant leaves on the trees among the overgrown weeds on the sides of the highway. He felt a little empty without Mikey. Even though he had just found out that they were brothers, Gerard felt a connection with him that he could not describe. He felt a little more complete inside after finding that he had a brother, but more was taken away from him when Mikey left. After what Frank had said about blood test, Gerard was still a little on edge, but he doubted Frank a little. You didn’t need to draw blood for DNA tests… right? He would research at home. Perhaps Frank was just trying to freak him out again. Gerard exited the highway and navigated his way back to Belleville. He reached his apartment building and drove to the parking garage to put his car into dormancy again. He unbuckled Bandit from her car seat and lifted her limp body from the chair. She did not stir. He adjusted her in his arm with difficultly until she started to wrap her arms around his neck, still half sleeping. Gerard shut the car door, locked it, and made his way up the concrete stairs.
Lindsey was waiting on the couch for them. The television was on to a news station, but Gerard could tell that she was not watching it, but thinking about what was to come. She turned her head to face Gerard who had started to go to Bandit’s room to put her to bed. Once he pulled the covers over Bandit, he returned to the small living room and sat down on the opposite side of the couch.
“Gerard…” Lindsey started. Gerard interrupted her.
“Lindsey, I haven’t been entirely truthful to you. It’s nothing horrible, really, it’s actually pretty good. Yes, very good, but this past few days I’ve passed by Mikey, that homeless man, and, you know, these little things happened. I don’t know. I just- one thing led to another and eventually I started talking to him.” Gerard explained how he had met Mikey before he had tried to kill himself. He explained what had happened that day. Finally, Gerard broke the news to her,
“Lindsey, Mikey’s my brother.” Lindsey started blankly at Gerard, seriously doubting Gerard’s statement. Gerard, recognizing the disbelief on her face, revealed all of the information he had pieced together to prove that Mikey was, in fact, his brother. As Gerard explained more and more, Lindsey started to believe that he was Mikey’s brother.
“Oh my god, Gerard, that’s—oh, I’m so sorry we couldn’t take him in.” Lindsey was genuinely regretful.
“No, it’s alright. He’s better off at Frank’s,” Gerard said. He still wanted to be with Mikey, but he was right; Mikey was better off at Frank’s. Lindsey moved herself next to where Gerard was sitting and embraced him.
“I’m sorry, Gerard. I was really distracted by the fact that you missing and got home hurt.” Gerard responded by hugging her back. Lindsey let him go and fingered at his bandages,
“Shouldn’t you change these? You should get it checked out, too.” Gerard unwrapped the bandages while saying,
“It should be fine. It’s doesn’t hurt that much. I just kind of have a headache.” When he revealed the back of his head, Lindsey put her hand to her mouth. The gash on the back of her husband’s head was still open. It was shiny with blood and the hair around it was encrusted with dry blood.
“Gerard, we need to take you to the hospital,” she said frantically, jumping up from the couch. Gerard stood up.
“No, I don’t need to go to the hospital. I’ll be fine. Just wrap my head up.”
“But it could get infected! A concussion even!”
“No, Lindsey, I’ll be fine.” Gerard put his hands on her shoulders. Lindsey recoiled. Not physically, but Gerard could see that her old defiant self, the one who would insist on anything, no matter how much Gerard would argue, was gone. She agreed, and turned away from Gerard to start making dinner. Gerard almost called out to her that he would go to the hospital. He didn’t really want to, but somewhere inside of him, he only wanted to raise conflict with Lindsey just so that he could convince himself she cared about him. Usually Lindsey would have dragged him to the hospital, but why not now?
~~~
Before he knew it, Mikey had traversed his way through the large house to find Frank in the family room. The room seemed to be completely separate from the house in terms of style. The design was mundane, like a common family room found in any middle class home. The floor was covered in a tan carpet and a long sofa stretched across one side of the wall. The only exception to the ordinariness was the television. It was at least 72” and the sound system next to it was impressively silvery metallic though they were turned off at the moment. Frank sat on the couch nursing a micro-brewed beer in his left hand, the remote in the other and was watching the old MTV Unplugged session with Nirvana in 1993. Frank looked up from the television and met Mikey’s face with a grin.
“Here, come sit down!” Mikey walked over and sat down on the leather couch next to Frank.
“You want a beer?” Frank asked, holding up his. Mikey shook his head and mumbled a “No, thank you.” The awkwardness between them was clear, but Mikey could tell that all Frank wanted to do at the moment was to start a conversation. On the television, Kurt Cobain started to sing “Where Did You Sleep Last Night”, Mikey thought, one of the most moving performances of all time. Just after the song was finished, the show ended and one of the pointless MTV reality show theme songs started to play. Frank switched off the television and drained the small amount of beer he had left. He stood up from the couch, exhaling, and offered to Mikey,
“I’m gonna start moving the stuff upstairs down to the basement for the studio. You’re welcome to help me, and last I checked, Jamia said she would finish making dinner in about an hour.” Mikey agreed and followed Frank, yet again, up the stairs into a different room. The room was cluttered with cardboard boxes filled with various different tapes and vinyls and recording materials. Various guitars were standing on their own supports and heavy looking amplifiers and recording machines.
“Here, let’s take these boxes down first,” Frank suggested. Mikey picked up a heavy box of vinyls and started to walk out of the doorway when he realized he did not know where the basement was.
“Uh, Frank, where’s the basement?” Frank picked up two boxes and stacked them on top of each other, blocking his face.
“Oh, I’ll show you.” Frank led Mikey down the stairs and to the family room. Just before the doorway to the family room, Frank opened a door on his left and descended down the stairs. Flipping the light switches as he went, he revealed the massive basement. Boxes were piled up along the wall of one room. Frank placed the boxes with the rest and Mikey followed. The two of them repeated the process until all the boxes in the upstairs room was gone. Frank put his hands on his hips and exhaled.
“Well, this room is done. I think dinner should be ready now.” Frank said and slapped Mikey on the back in good nature.
~~~
Though he had not eaten any at all that day, Gerard was not hungry. He had gone to bed, not knowing what to do. The sun was nearly disappearing behind the old buildings, and just like Gerard’s disposition, his room was slowly growing darker. When Gerard was young, about 12 or 13, he had been forced to go to a psychologist. It was a miracle his grandparents could afford it, but after weeks of talking, Gerard was told he had severe clinical depression. After that, Gerard had refused to go to the psychologist. Deep down, he knew he was depressed. What else could have explained the crippling feelings of hopelessness and occasional private breakdowns? After that, Gerard kept everything hidden. He never displayed real emotion with fear that just like the psychologist, everyone would judge him and even misunderstand him. Everyone assumed he was all right, of course, until his suicide attempt. Even afterwards, Gerard refused to go to a therapist, let alone be put on medication. So today, Gerard was in a deep hole of depression. After everything that had happened, his head hurting, and his untreated psychological disorder acting up, Gerard could not bring himself to do anything. He was lying in his bed, curled up, yet not tired at all. He was wide awake, but he could not even handle standing. At the moment, Gerard could not quite pinpoint the trigger of the sadness, but he what he was experiencing was real, and it hurt. Indescribable, maybe, but as Gerard would describe: a mental pain, yet physically hurting. It would hurt his chest. He would not be able to breathe at times. This would not stop, the paralyzing paranoia would not end, and all Gerard wanted was a drink. One drink. Just as the last beam of light faded away from Gerard’s room, he promised himself a drink just as soon as everyone was asleep.
Gerard waited hours, pretending to be asleep, after Lindsey had settled in bed, and only then had he cautiously gotten up out of bed and dragged himself to the corner of the room. Only tonight, Gerard thought, only one night. He lifted to floorboards and reached down to retrieve a bottle. Any bottle, it didn’t matter. Fortunately for Gerard, the bottle was unopened. Gerard slipped on a thin white t-shirt and his coat. Hiding the bottle in his coat, he crept out of his room, into the hallway, and out the door, all without Lindsey noticing. Gerard felt the wind grab his bare legs as he immediately regretted putting on actual pants. The bottle still hidden in his jacket, he stumbled down the stairs all the way down to the garage level. Inside, it was less cold, but not by much, only the wind had been taken away. Gerard walked over to the third row of cars and to his small Honda. He felt his pocket for his keys, and after confirming their presence, he unlocked the car door and stepped into the passenger seat. Reclining the back of the seat further, he made himself comfortable and popped open the bottle of alcohol. Gerard barely made out the words on the label with the pale lights on the garage ceiling. It was bourbon. Cheap bourbon, but alcohol nonetheless. Gerard wasn’t picky. Just as he brought the cold, glass bottle to his mouth, Gerard rethought about his pledge to sobriety.
~~~
As Frank and Jamia carried on with their conversation with the family at the dinner table, Mikey sat quietly next to Frank, eating their delicious meal of pork chops, mashed potatoes, and a tasty caesar salad. He was not thinking anything at the moment and what caught by surprise when Frank started to introduce him to Cherry and Lily.
“Mikey here is going to be staying with us for a while. Be respectful to him and don’t ask anything of him, okay? He’s our guest.” Cherry and Lily mumbled hellos, a little shy of him.
The dinner went by quickly and soon, Jamia was taking everyone’s plate. Regretting that he hadn’t offered first, Mikey handed his empty plate to Jamia. This was all foreign to him. Was this what a normal family like? The day had no real structure, Mikey thought. There seemed to be no routine, unlike days at the orphanage where meals were at an exact time, lights were out for certain ages, and laundry day was at the same time and same day each week. He liked not knowing what was going to happen. Of course, all of this seemed routine to Frank and his family, but Mikey’s childhood had been so different from theirs. Not knowing what to do, Mikey returned to his room and lay on his bed. In the huge house, sound traveled easily, echoing of the walls. It was usually quiet, and Mikey could hear the strumming of an acoustic guitar and soft singing. It was almost seven, and Mikey had time to kill. He strode down the stairs to find the guitar player, most likely Frank. He found Frank sitting on the couch in the living room hunched over a guitar. Cherry and Lily were in front of him giggling and rolling on the floor. As Mikey came closer he heard Frank singing.
“You said, ‘How may I help you?’
And then I smelt poo.
I looked all around me,
I even checked my shoes.
The burning in my eyes, then I realized.
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is it? I want to know.
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
I smelt something foul; it must be your bowels.
Its kinda demonic you need a colonic
Is that your breathe or did you just fart
Break it down!
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?
Is that your breath or did you just fart?”
Mikey could not suppress his laughter. Frank was already on the brink of complete hilarity, so Mikey turned around and ran up the stairs and into his room where he broke down in laughter. He had never grasped the concept of a “real” childhood. Of course, he had wished and prayed for a pair of loving parents to adopt him, but since it had never come true, he had never known. Usually, in these cases of self-pity, Mikey would just wallow in his own despair, but the positivity of the house, the friendliness as opposed to the evil world gave him a different outlook. He thought to himself that even though he never got to have a “real” childhood, at least he could have a taste of what it would have been like now.
~~~
Gerard woke in the passenger seat of his car. His head was pounding and he could not lift his head. It seemed as thought bricks were piled up on his body. Eventually, he got himself to sit up. His shirt was covered in vomit and an empty bottle of bourbon lay on the ground. Gerard stared at the ground, attempting to recollect what had happened. He remembered. These kinds of moments were not uncommon when he was a serious alcoholic, yet, now, Gerard did not regret his decisions. He had drowned his sorrows in the only he liquid he knew that could. Despite his indifference to his obviously budding problem, he did not attempt to hurry to get to work. He would call in sick today. An acidic taste lingered in the back of his mouth. He spat on the ground and stumbled towards the staircase. Judging by the position of the sun, he should have been at work already. Luckily for Gerard, he frequently left for work before anyone woke up. He did not want to face Lindsey or Bandit today. Though it satisfied him to drink, he knew how much it would hurt them. He promised himself that his indulgences would have to be private. He would wait until Lindsey and Bandit left the house. Still sitting on the concrete steps, he drifted to sleep, head leaning against the wall.
A/N Sorry about that weird part with the song. I was in a stupid mood :P Here's the link to the video if you would like:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzVi-hCac8c
Please Rate & Review if you liked it!! So long and goodnight ;D
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