FicWad

Italics are her thoughts.



The Dragonlord's study has never been so full. Two of the dragon secretary set are present, as well as the Dragonlord and a representative from each of the searching parties currently combing the castle grounds. The Dragonlord looks the least stressed of the group, but even he is perturbed.

"So in the course of two days, we've lost Lady Raseleane twice?"
"Well, the first time it wasn't so much that we lost her, as that we forgot to collect her." Alfeegi gives Lykouleon a nervous smile as Ruwalk steps forward.
"You don't think that she was kidnapped do you my lord?"
Lykouleon shakes his head while thinking out loud. "If a yokai had managed to enter the grounds, then every one of us would have known. She would have to be lured out first, and then she would have been seen at one of the gates." He shakes his head again. "She must still be in the castle, we should search again." He looks directly at Ruwalk and Alfeegi. "I'm also worried about Tetheus. He hasn't turned up either."
The senior dragons share glances. Not having their Chief of Security during a major search of the grounds has severely hampered their efforts.
A commotion at the door is explained when Tetheus enters looking flushed and guilty. He walks right up to Lykouleon and starts talking before the Dragonlord can get a word in.
"The dragon fighters at the gates have told me what's been happening. I'm really sorry my lord. I didn't think. The lady Raseleane is perfectly safe, I've escorted her to the doctor's room and he's examining her now. She should be ready to meet you before dinner, assuming everything goes well."
Everyone in the room breathes a sigh of relief and then Lykouleon eyes Tetheus mischievously. "And what exactly happened to the fair lady Raseleane?"
Tetheus gulps nervously before continuing. "I met her by the stables and agreed to tutor her in riding darnas. Well, she insisted on a more challenging ride." A tiny sweatdrop starts to form on Tetheus's forehead. Ruwalk and Alfeegi follow its progress down his face with fascination. "I couldn't say no. She insisted that she'd be perfectly safe with me to protect her, so, we, went, beyond the castle walls and for a very short, safe trip in the gentle, safe valley, far from any yokai. I'm so very sorry." Tetheus bows low and waits for recriminations. Alfeegi's the first to respond and his voice is incredulous.
"You mean, that this woman..."
"Future Dragonqueen of Dusis," interjects Ruwalk.
"Future Dragonqueen of Dusis," Alfeegi continues. "Who you've never met before..." Tetheus nods. "Managed to talk you, the Head of Security for the Dragon Castle and responsible for her personal safety, into taking her beyond the castle grounds and the safety of the lord's yokai shield?"
Tetheus merely nods. Alfeegi beams at the Dragonlord. "Looks like we'll finally be getting a diplomat with the next generation. Thank god. You're utterly useless at that sort of thing."
"Alfeegi?!" Both Ruwalk and Tetheus are glaring at Alfeegi.
"Sorry. You're utterly useless at that sort of thing, my lord."



~~~~~~~~~

Raseleane's elation at the ride is swiftly diminishing. For some reason doctors' rooms, by a law of nature, have to be below freezing at all times. Absolutely nothing is allowed to heat the room up and the doctors seem to be the only ones who don't notice that the temperature qualifies the room as being in the midst of an ice age. Raseleane is shivering, naked, while the doctor runs various established, humiliating tests to check her general health and fertility.
"Your periods occur regularly?" The doctor is noting down all responses on a sheet of paper, most of them pre-emptively.
"Yes."
"And your last flow was on what date?"
"Oh about, three weeks ago."
"Describe the consistency." The questions are rattled off, almost before they are answered. When Raseleane hesitates over the last question, the doctor reaches into a counter and hands over another empty bottle. "Please fill this with a sample on the occasion of your next flow. Now sit on the table and relax. This may be a little cold."
Another bottle? How many different types of sample does he want? I've never felt so violated. I hope I never have to go through this again.
Raseleane lies back on the table while her most intimate areas are probed and details entered on the doctor's sheet. Her cheeks grow red with an embarrassed flush. I had thought that only my husband would ever see those areas, and I sure hoped that the first time they were touched would be more gentle and loving than this. The doctor humphs happily and writes a final detail on the sheet before allowing Raseleane to rise.
"Congratulations, you appear to be a virgin and in excellent health. I'll be able to give a more detailed analysis when you return those three samples to me, but I'm sure they won't turn up anything that would disqualify you from joining the royal family. I'll send on a copy of my report to the Dragonlord, but in the meantime..."
The doctor turns his back and rummages through the notes on his desk. Raseleane remains on the table, unsure whether now she is allowed to clothe herself. She picks up her dress and holds it to her body while she waits for the doctor to turn his attention back to her. He pulls out a sheet of paper and speaks again.


"Eat more of these foods, and avoid these ones. I'll send the list down to the kitchens for you."
"And why should I avoid these foods?"
The doctor looks up at her and blinks, as if realising for the first time, that he's been examining an actual person, who might be interested in why so many uncomfortable objects have been poked inside of her.
"Oh well, the foods prescribed either contribute to pregnancy, or have been proven to improve the health of the baby when it's born. Once the second baby has been delivered, you can return to a preferred diet. The wet-nurse, however, will be following the same diet, to ensure a high quality of milk."
I'm not even going to be able to care for my baby? "Um, a wet-nurse?"
The doctor looks at her. "That is the tradition right now isn't it? Most women are only too happy to hand their children over to the nurse. Feeding them tends to interfere terribly with their social life."
Raseleane clutches her dress to her. "Should I get dressed now?"
"Ah, of course." A flush spreads over the doctor's cheeks to match her own. "I'll wait in the next room. Please take your time, your majesty."
The doctor leaves through the door and Raseleane slowly rises to her feet. Her clothing is difficult to put on without help and Raseleane gives up on the corset and removes it. Her dress is slightly baggy without it and her unsupported breasts brush against the fabric as she walks. When she is fully dressed she lays the corset on the table and joins the doctor in the outer room.
"Could you have someone bring the corset to my room?" she asks. The doctor nods and Raseleane curtseys before returning to her suite, where Wilhemina is waiting for her. She rushes over and berates the lackless girl.
"The Dragonlord is waiting for you! Where were you? The castle's been turned upside down searching and no sign is found anywhere. The Dragonlord's wondering if you've run away. The Secretaries have been whispering in corners and I've been dying of the shame."
"Mother..."
"Don't 'mother' me. This is our family's chance to make something of ourselves and you've been busily ruining it. The entire castle! Two times a minute some fresh-faced young man would poke his head in and ask if I'd seen you. The entire castle knows that you've been missing. It's a scandal, a disgrace. We'll be lucky if we're not sent packing."
"You're exaggerating."
"Exaggerating?!"
Raseleane breezes past her mother, projecting an air of cold as she does so. "I had no appointment with the Dragonlord. Don't forget that he broke his with me. I was simply spending my time in the garden wondering if I'd been discarded already." She turns and stares at Wilhemina, reminding her of the slur already cast on their family's name. She calms down, but still hasn't gained an explanation from Raseleane, so she pushes further.
"The gardens were searched as thoroughly as the castle, where did you manage to hide?"
Raseleane sits and beckons her mother to do so too. Once she's seated Raseleane explains everything that happened since she met Tetheus. She leaves out the arrival of the Dragonlord though. I think it's best to plead ignorance on this. If I'd known he was back in the castle, it'd be foolish of me to travel beyond the castle grounds. I'm sure that Tetheus would've refused to take me if he'd known. Wilhemina is horrified.
"So you just, just, took off with this stranger? He could've done anything!"
"Mother, he's one of the Dragon Secretaries, the Chief of Security and a noble and honourable man. You'll meet him at dinner, I'm sure. He's lovely and really sweet. He wouldn't think of doing anything inappropriate. He's reserved and dedicated to his duty."
"Raseleane, you should still think of your position. If word got out that you'd ignored your fiancée to go gallivanting with one of his officers, no matter if it was perfectly innocent, a scandal could erupt. People like nothing better than to gossip and right now you've got no protection. If the Dragonlord decides that the scandal attached to you is too high, he could break the engagement and wait for another girl to be born with dragoneyes."
"I don't think he'd be willing to wait somehow."
"What? Why do you say that?"
Oops, I'm not supposed to know about that. "I overheard someone say that he's anxious for an heir. That's all."
"That's no guarantee. You should know better than to listen to gossip. Don't believe every word you hear, but fear its power. Loose talk has ruined many a maiden's reputation."
"You'll therefore be pleased to note that the castle's doctor has declared me a virgin then. I'm sure that the criers will be spreading the news through the halls of the castle and streets of the town."
"Oh." Wilhemia leaves her seat and hugs Raseleane. "You should have sent word that you were being examined. I'd have accompanied you. Was the doctor a man? I hope scandal doesn't erupt from that too."
"Mother?" Raseleane's voice is close to breaking.
"I know dear. That kind of examination must have been awful. We have no choice now, but to follow their rules. It's all right dear. It's okay."
The two women hold each other until a knock on the door reveals a messenger, announcing that the Dragonlord would be arriving in an hour to greet the lady Raseleane. The two ladies retire to Raseleane's room to search for the perfect dress to meet him in. They settle on a midnight blue silk, with pearls adorning Raseleane's hair and neck, and then start the dressing ceremony. First a new corset is squeezed into, then the dress is laid out and formally approved. Raseleane steps into it and her mother laces it up at the back. Then, the hair is brushed 99 times and bound and decorated with the pearls. Light make-up is applied, as the Dragonqueen is a delicate rose of great beauty needing no adornment. The final act, is the placing of a simple row of pearls around her neck, like a collar fitting into place. The mirror shows a confident, calm, uptight, unbendable lady. Inside, the story changes.
Her emotions whirl and twist as she waits perfectly still for the rest of her life to appear. If I move I might disturb my perfectly composed picture and mother would not be pleased. I think we may have overdone it with the pearls, are they slipping to one side? I think I can feel them slightly heavier on the left. Are they? Anything that will distract her from the countdown to her destiny is eagerly seized on. The corset's support forces her into a confident posture, but every moment her thoughts return to how inadequate she is. Will the Dragonlord like me? Am I good enough? Running true to form, he is late, and she waits in agony for over half an hour, in her artfully chosen pose. Neither she, nor her mother have spoken since the preparation finished and the wait began. If only, I had more time. If only this wasn't so awkward. If only I was at home, surrounded by familiar things and comfortable dresses. I think they laced this one with itching powder.
When the knock does come, both are jolted. Wilhemina rises, looking Raseleane over carefully one final time, before opening the door. This time, there is no messenger, only a smiling blond man dressed all in white. Wilhemina leads him to Raseleane and seats him beside her, before moving to the farthest chair in the room. Raseleane smiles and introduces herself, but inside she's cold.
How can this be? Yes, he's attractive. Yes, I can see the weight he bears on his shoulders and how tired he looks. Yes, he seems kind, his eyes hold a softness I've not seen before, but I feel nothing for him. This man is a stranger, I know less about him that any other person in this castle and I'm quite sure that he feels the same way about me. He doesn't know what to make of me. Look at how he's casting about for a topic. Surely we have more in common than an ability to notice the weather.
I thought that there was supposed to be a spark. I thought that you were supposed to know when you meet the person you're destined to marry. The one that'll make you happy forever. The one that'll hold you as the most important thing in his life. Where's the lightning, the electricity, the moment of perfect joy and complete understanding? I thought that when you met the one, you were somehow supposed to turn from being two people, into being one perfect whole. I'm still Raseleane. Nothing's changed. This isn't the person I'm supposed to be with. He isn't my other half. I'm a baby machine to him and nothing more. He doesn't want to be here and neither do I. How can I agree to spend the rest of my life with him?