FicWad

I thudded down the railroad kicking the loose iron stakes that had become liberated from the tracks in the hundred years since it was built, beaten and forced to bare millions of tons of steel, over time they escaped. I shifted my bag so that the weight sat heavy on my left shoulder everything I owned now was in there. It was Spring, I peered off into the distance making out the raining Sakura grove. It was a group of cherry blossom trees that formed a perfect circle, with an single opening facing the track. I had been going there for three years now. 




It started in eighth grade, I never really had friends, not close ones that I could tell anything to, I had a girlfriend once but she had moved with her family to sunny Tampa, Florida. I started skipping school and heading off to the grove then. It was my place, I was always surprised that no one had found it e until one evening I left my sketch book there, filled with page upon page of portraits of random people around town, comics, sketches of the trees. When I came back the next day the book was open and there was a note on the last page. 




Your art work is amazing, I didn’t think anyone else came here. I like the portrait you did of me, you made me so beautiful, maybe I’ll see you sometime, write me back.
-F.I


So we wrote like this for years.




Dear F.I, I’m Gerard and this is where I go when I need inspiration. I love to draw here, I’ll spend hours just listening to my WalkMan (that’s an old school Ipod, no I’m not a hipster.) and dreaming about making it out of this town. I love it in the spring when the blossoms fall as the train rumbles by, how it shakes the ground and it rains soft pink. You say I’ve drawn you, which one are you? I barely know anyone I draw, I barely know anyone period. I hate this town, are you different, like me?
-Gee


Dear Gerard, I know you from school but you don’t know me, I’m afraid if you did you wouldn’t like me. I know what a walkman is, I left you a tape from mine I hope you like it, when you’re done I want it back though, it’s one of my favorites. The cherry blossoms are beautiful, I like coming here when I can’t sleep, or when my dad gets...too hard to manage. I write a lot, that’s what I do here, songs mostly. My guitar is my most prized possession. I’m not very good at making art. I hope you keep writing to me, I think you’re cool. I don’t know why everyone at school treats you so badly.They’re not exactly kind to me either. I’m invisible most of the time though, I’m different,maybe not like you though.
-F.I


The tape that F.I left me was by a band called Placebo, they were really good, I looked them up online and fell in love with their lead singer, he was gorgeous, as much as a guy could be, unless they were Bowie or something, that man was tastey (t-t-t-tastey). 






Dear F.I, music is Art, I like to think capitalized Art embodies all arty things like music and writing and performance. All of my favorite things. I write music too, I can barely play a guitar though. I’m seriously horrible at it, but regardless I love to get my feelings out on paper and I don’t like poetry very much and when I write I can hear the music to them already so no way they’re poems. I love the tape you gave me, I’m leaving an Iron Maiden tape hear for you. I think that I would still like you if you I met you, hell I would still like you if you were Hitler, or some other evil figure like Satan or Santa Clause. I like writing to you, I think your cool too.
-Gee
Ps. leave one of your songs, I want to read it.
Pss. Sorry if you’re Jewish I didn’t mean anything by the Hitler remark.
Psss. Oh my Jesus I just realized pSS. like the nazi secret police.
Pssss. Sorry about the Jesus remark too, I forgot he doesn’t exist in judeism.
Psssss.I’ve gotta get off this Nazi kick. Also I don’t think Jesus exists at all, or maybe he was a philosopher many ears ago. I don’t belive in anything.




I left my current tape attached to the letter. The tracks began to seem like and an increasingly shorter walk now that I had F.I’s letters to look forward to,I wondered what her voice sounded like and I couldn’t wait to see her lyrics.



Dear Gerard, today I asked you a question, if that is a hint to who I am). No, I am not Jewish but I did get a kick out of all your Ps.’ing. I’m already a huge Iron Maiden fan, do you like any harder Metal? I’m leaving you a Gorgoroth tape this time, they’re really awesome Norwegian black metal. I like some poetry but I know what you mean when you say you can hear the music in your head, I try to play the music I hear in my head, I can never come up with music to this one though, maybe you can.

We hold in our hearts the sword and the faith 
Swelled up from the rain, clouds move like a wraith 
Well after all, we'll lie another day 
And through it all, we'll find some other way 
To carry on through cartilage and fluid -
And did you come to stare or wash away the blood? 
/]
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Well tonight, well tonight 
Will it ever come? 
Spend the rest of your days rocking out 
Just for the dead 
Well tonight 
Will it ever come? 
I can see you awake anytime, in my head 
/]
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Did we all fall down? 
Did we all fall down? 
Did we all fall down? 
Did we all fall down? 
From the lights to the pavement 
From the van to the floor 
From backstage to the doctor 
From the Earth to the morgue, morgue, morgue, morgue 
/]
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Well tonight 
Will it ever come? 
Spend the rest of your days rocking out 
Just for the dead 
Well tonight 
Will it ever come? 
I can see you awake anytime in my head 
/]
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All fall down 
Well after all...


-F.I

Dear F.I, I can here the music, it’s beautiful, I think you’re mind is beautiful. I had a shitty day today and this made it better. I’m not really into heavy metal, but that Gorgoroth is okay. I like Manson and that’s as ‘hardcore’ as I get. If I redraw every girl in my sketchbook, will you tell me which one is you?
A train just went by, I walked up so close to it I thought it would swallow me, suck me under it’s wheels and leave me in a pile of gore for you to find. Sometimes I think of what it would be like to hop one of them and never look back. I hate this town I hate the people, I hate everyone in my family except for my brother and he’s in boarding school right now. I got a black eye from my dad,this morning, he’d been drinking all night. Then today some assholes were giving me shit about it. I got in a fist fight with Brett Dale...yeah, he kicked my ass. Now I have two blotchy black eyes, I look horrible. There are 26 girls in my sketch book that go to our school, in at least 52 days I’ll know who you are.
-Gee


The sketch that I re-did today was of a girl I drew in 7th grade. She had short blond hair, the sketch wasn’t very good, but I remembered her face. Very pointy, high cheek bones, glossy lips and large golden hoop earrings that were to big for her that all of the mexican girls in my grade wore. I left the drawing with a single blossom on the nose.



Okay guys tell me what you think, should I do any more chaps? this will probably end up being a tragedy, I'm thinking there will be two parts about 10-15 chaps total but it depends on the feedback. Read and Reviw and