Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance
Turn Away
Tears stream down Pete's cheeks, hot and cold at the same time, as he reads through Mikey's journal, bottom lip sucked between his teeth.
January 20th
They did it again, they took my iPod and threw it to the ground and jumped on it and taunted me and made me feel like a piece of trash and half the time I can't take it anymore. The only reason I'm still here is because of Pete. I know he loves me lots, but sometimes it feels like he doesn't. I'm so confused and scared and I don't know where to look. I'm frightened of everything.
January 29th
Today was the worst beating in a while. I have the bruises to show.
That line has Pete almost breaking down again. He had asked Mikey where the bruises came from, and he had told him that it was nothing, that it was just an accident. And he believed him.
I bled more than usual, too, bled a lot. Gerard was kind of worried, I told him not to be. That it was just an accident. That's what I told Pete, too. I wish I could tell someone about these things, but they'd just get mad at me for not being able to defend myself. They don't understand that I actually can't defend myself, though, that I'm jut plain old weak little Mikey Way, that I'm just useless. I should be dead and I intend on fixing that.
Pete checks the date, trying to calm his breathing. The date is January 26th, two days after Mikey has written that last journal entry. Two days since Pete has last seen his Mikeymouse, his reasons for reasons, his precious baby. Which, technically, can only mean...
"No!" The cry escapes Pete's lips and he leaps to his feet, wiping his eyes and running. He doesn't even bother to grab a jacket, he just runs out into the cold wet weather, determined to make it to Mikey's house before he can do anything stupid. He can't lose his Mikeymouse, not now, not ever. He planned on making Mikey his forever in a few years, he wanted to get down on one knee and run away with the shy, awkward boy with the funny knees. He can't lose Mikey, not now. Please, God, let Mikey be safe.
The rain is coming down harder now, quite hard and he's positively freezing but he doesn't care. Pete is almost at the Way house, panting, out of breath, but almost there. He speeds up, almost falling a few times but not falling and he couldn't be more grateful. He manages to ring the doorbell, fingers red and raw from the cold. Gerard answers the door, opening it and letting Pete in without a single word exchanged between the two. In the beginning, Gerard was wary of Pete, he didn't want Mikey hurt. When he heard that Pete had punched a guy in the dick for saying something about Mikey, though, he started warming up to the guy. He knows Mikey was happy with him, and all he wants is for Mikey to be happy. Gerard likes that.
"Where's Mikes?" Pete asks, doubled over and catching his breath. Gerard shrugs, biting his lip nervously.
"Haven't seen him in two days. Mom and Dad are outta town and I haven't been to check on him. Thought he mighta been at yours, or at Gabe's. Somethin' like that." Gerard whispers his words, kind of scared of the animalistic look in Pete's eye.
"You IDIOT!" Pete shrieks, rushing forwards. Gerard's cry of protest is drowned in the sudden scream that emits from Mikey's room.
Pete's eyes widen and he's on the floor, sobbing brokenly. His Mikey, his everything, his muse, his perfection, his rainbow, his heart is hanging from a fucking rope. The whole room smells like death and it's a smell that will scar Pete for-fucking-ever. He still is struggling to believe that that is his Mikey hanging from that rope. But it's him, mousy hair limp, hazel eyes wide and glassy and scared. And Pete can't stand it.
"NO!" He screams, loud and loose and guttural and positively broken. He shakes his head, tears flying everywhere. Gerard appears behind him and he too falls to his knees, wailing for his dead brother, crying for the amazing soul that left this earth two days ago. Pete leans to the side and vomits, Gerard doing the same. Pete wipes his mouth, wincing a little at the awful taste on his lips. He stumbles to his feet, making his way shakily to Mikey's drawer. He knows that Mikey always kept a gun in his drawer for some crazy reason, maybe he thought there was going to be a robbery. He shrugged away the thought and curled his fingers around the cold metal of the gun. He nodded at Gerard, taking a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, Gerard.. He meant the world to me." Pete shook his head as he took a lurch forward, eyeliner running down his face in haphazard trains of black. Gerard gasped for breath, crawling away from the room as Pete turned to face his dead boyfriend.
"Together forever, baby, together forever." From his pocket, he produced a small box, the box that contained the diamond ring that Pete was going to put on Mikey's finger if he was still fucking alive. Tears beginning to flow again, he plucked the ring from the box, and slipped it on his dead lover's finger. He raised the gun to his temple and shut his eyes.
"And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am."
Pete's voice shook as he sang the lyrics quietly, but not as much as the floor shook when he pulled the trigger.
Tears stream down Pete's cheeks, hot and cold at the same time, as he reads through Mikey's journal, bottom lip sucked between his teeth.
January 20th
They did it again, they took my iPod and threw it to the ground and jumped on it and taunted me and made me feel like a piece of trash and half the time I can't take it anymore. The only reason I'm still here is because of Pete. I know he loves me lots, but sometimes it feels like he doesn't. I'm so confused and scared and I don't know where to look. I'm frightened of everything.
January 29th
Today was the worst beating in a while. I have the bruises to show.
That line has Pete almost breaking down again. He had asked Mikey where the bruises came from, and he had told him that it was nothing, that it was just an accident. And he believed him.
I bled more than usual, too, bled a lot. Gerard was kind of worried, I told him not to be. That it was just an accident. That's what I told Pete, too. I wish I could tell someone about these things, but they'd just get mad at me for not being able to defend myself. They don't understand that I actually can't defend myself, though, that I'm jut plain old weak little Mikey Way, that I'm just useless. I should be dead and I intend on fixing that.
Pete checks the date, trying to calm his breathing. The date is January 26th, two days after Mikey has written that last journal entry. Two days since Pete has last seen his Mikeymouse, his reasons for reasons, his precious baby. Which, technically, can only mean...
"No!" The cry escapes Pete's lips and he leaps to his feet, wiping his eyes and running. He doesn't even bother to grab a jacket, he just runs out into the cold wet weather, determined to make it to Mikey's house before he can do anything stupid. He can't lose his Mikeymouse, not now, not ever. He planned on making Mikey his forever in a few years, he wanted to get down on one knee and run away with the shy, awkward boy with the funny knees. He can't lose Mikey, not now. Please, God, let Mikey be safe.
The rain is coming down harder now, quite hard and he's positively freezing but he doesn't care. Pete is almost at the Way house, panting, out of breath, but almost there. He speeds up, almost falling a few times but not falling and he couldn't be more grateful. He manages to ring the doorbell, fingers red and raw from the cold. Gerard answers the door, opening it and letting Pete in without a single word exchanged between the two. In the beginning, Gerard was wary of Pete, he didn't want Mikey hurt. When he heard that Pete had punched a guy in the dick for saying something about Mikey, though, he started warming up to the guy. He knows Mikey was happy with him, and all he wants is for Mikey to be happy. Gerard likes that.
"Where's Mikes?" Pete asks, doubled over and catching his breath. Gerard shrugs, biting his lip nervously.
"Haven't seen him in two days. Mom and Dad are outta town and I haven't been to check on him. Thought he mighta been at yours, or at Gabe's. Somethin' like that." Gerard whispers his words, kind of scared of the animalistic look in Pete's eye.
"You IDIOT!" Pete shrieks, rushing forwards. Gerard's cry of protest is drowned in the sudden scream that emits from Mikey's room.
Pete's eyes widen and he's on the floor, sobbing brokenly. His Mikey, his everything, his muse, his perfection, his rainbow, his heart is hanging from a fucking rope. The whole room smells like death and it's a smell that will scar Pete for-fucking-ever. He still is struggling to believe that that is his Mikey hanging from that rope. But it's him, mousy hair limp, hazel eyes wide and glassy and scared. And Pete can't stand it.
"NO!" He screams, loud and loose and guttural and positively broken. He shakes his head, tears flying everywhere. Gerard appears behind him and he too falls to his knees, wailing for his dead brother, crying for the amazing soul that left this earth two days ago. Pete leans to the side and vomits, Gerard doing the same. Pete wipes his mouth, wincing a little at the awful taste on his lips. He stumbles to his feet, making his way shakily to Mikey's drawer. He knows that Mikey always kept a gun in his drawer for some crazy reason, maybe he thought there was going to be a robbery. He shrugged away the thought and curled his fingers around the cold metal of the gun. He nodded at Gerard, taking a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, Gerard.. He meant the world to me." Pete shook his head as he took a lurch forward, eyeliner running down his face in haphazard trains of black. Gerard gasped for breath, crawling away from the room as Pete turned to face his dead boyfriend.
"Together forever, baby, together forever." From his pocket, he produced a small box, the box that contained the diamond ring that Pete was going to put on Mikey's finger if he was still fucking alive. Tears beginning to flow again, he plucked the ring from the box, and slipped it on his dead lover's finger. He raised the gun to his temple and shut his eyes.
"And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am."
Pete's voice shook as he sang the lyrics quietly, but not as much as the floor shook when he pulled the trigger.
Sign up to rate and review this story