Categories > TV > WWE
Sometimes Silence Can Seem So Loud
1 reviewShe was always going to look after him, even if he didn't want her to. Jon Moxley/OC.
1Moving
Jon Moxley was not the kind of guy to rely on anyone to help him out, and he damn sure was not the kind of guy to sit back idly and let people take care of him. He didn't need anyone's help; he never had. He'd practically raised himself, since his mother couldn't be bothered to give a fuck about anything other than drugs and men. Jon doubted that she even noticed the nights he spent on the streets, too afraid to come home because he didn't want to get beat up by yet another one of his mom's “friends”, who were more often than not drunken rednecks who thought they were teaching him a lesson by beating him up.
Jon couldn't look at himself in the mirror most times without cringing because of that. No wonder practically everyone he came in contact kept him at arms' length—his own mother had done it. Drugs, alcohol, and prostitution had been more important to her than her son, and his father had apparently been too busy to give a fuck as well, because Jon had never met the man. Not even once. Most kids that came from broken homes usually had at least one parent that cared somewhat about them, but Jon didn't even have that.
As a result of this, Jon gave the people around him the same treatment they gave him. He'd had exactly two girlfriends his entire life, and both of them had bolted the minute they'd learned what his family life was like. They'd told Jon that nothing he told them could cause them to leave him, but of course they'd lied. In retrospect, Jon couldn't really blame them. He didn't love himself; how the hell could he expect anyone else to? Not like it mattered to him anyway. He didn't give a damn.
And then he'd met her. The girl that, no matter how hard he tried to push her away, refused to leave Jon's side. She came from a similar background, with her own mother an absentee figure in her life. Luckily, she'd had a father to at least help raise her, but still, she knew exactly where Jon was coming from and how he felt. She knew how hard Jon struggled with looking at himself in the mirror, and she knew what it felt like to not want to get out of bed in the morning. She also knew when people were only pretending to care, and she wanted Jon to know that the words she said to him were actually genuine. She didn't expect to say or do anything life-changing. She just wanted to help him.
“Why?” he'd ask, frustrated with her efforts. Who did she think she was, anyway? Why did she care so much about what happened to him? He didn't want her help, and he hadn't asked for it.
“Why won't you leave me alone?”
“Because I know you don't want me to,” she'd reply evenly. “This is me you're talking to, remember? I know you better than you think.”
“I hate you.”
“You love me.”
It was the same conversation every time, with the same end result. Jon would scream incoherently in frustration, his girlfriend would simply kiss his cheek softly, and that was that. Both of them were notoriously stubborn, but when it came to which one of them was the most stubborn, Jon's lady love won out. She wasn't going to give up on him like everyone else had. She was going to stick by his side for as long as she was able to, whether Jon Moxley liked it or not. There would be no getting rid of her.
Jon loved her; he really did. He really, truly, completely loved her, so much so that it was hard to breathe when she wasn't around, and that scared him. Before, he'd been perfectly content to walk the path of solitude alone. He'd accepted a long time ago that his path in life was meant to be a solitary one, and he was okay with that. No additional people meant no additional pain, heartbreak, and hurt. Those that only knew him on a surface level thought that Jon was moody, an asshole, selfish, and standoffish. Jon never bothered to convince them that this wasn't the case, because people thinking this ensured that no one would bother trying to get close to him.
But she'd seen past Jon's facade, and with unwavering love and patience, had slowly made progress with Jon's self-loathing issues. He was never going to be the most well-adjusted person in the world, but that was okay, because his girlfriend didn't expect him to be. For once, Jon Moxley didn't have to be anyone but himself with someone else. It was a foreign feeling, and very scary, but a relief at the same time.
No more pretending. No more lying. Just unconditional, unwavering love.
Jon couldn't look at himself in the mirror most times without cringing because of that. No wonder practically everyone he came in contact kept him at arms' length—his own mother had done it. Drugs, alcohol, and prostitution had been more important to her than her son, and his father had apparently been too busy to give a fuck as well, because Jon had never met the man. Not even once. Most kids that came from broken homes usually had at least one parent that cared somewhat about them, but Jon didn't even have that.
As a result of this, Jon gave the people around him the same treatment they gave him. He'd had exactly two girlfriends his entire life, and both of them had bolted the minute they'd learned what his family life was like. They'd told Jon that nothing he told them could cause them to leave him, but of course they'd lied. In retrospect, Jon couldn't really blame them. He didn't love himself; how the hell could he expect anyone else to? Not like it mattered to him anyway. He didn't give a damn.
And then he'd met her. The girl that, no matter how hard he tried to push her away, refused to leave Jon's side. She came from a similar background, with her own mother an absentee figure in her life. Luckily, she'd had a father to at least help raise her, but still, she knew exactly where Jon was coming from and how he felt. She knew how hard Jon struggled with looking at himself in the mirror, and she knew what it felt like to not want to get out of bed in the morning. She also knew when people were only pretending to care, and she wanted Jon to know that the words she said to him were actually genuine. She didn't expect to say or do anything life-changing. She just wanted to help him.
“Why?” he'd ask, frustrated with her efforts. Who did she think she was, anyway? Why did she care so much about what happened to him? He didn't want her help, and he hadn't asked for it.
“Why won't you leave me alone?”
“Because I know you don't want me to,” she'd reply evenly. “This is me you're talking to, remember? I know you better than you think.”
“I hate you.”
“You love me.”
It was the same conversation every time, with the same end result. Jon would scream incoherently in frustration, his girlfriend would simply kiss his cheek softly, and that was that. Both of them were notoriously stubborn, but when it came to which one of them was the most stubborn, Jon's lady love won out. She wasn't going to give up on him like everyone else had. She was going to stick by his side for as long as she was able to, whether Jon Moxley liked it or not. There would be no getting rid of her.
Jon loved her; he really did. He really, truly, completely loved her, so much so that it was hard to breathe when she wasn't around, and that scared him. Before, he'd been perfectly content to walk the path of solitude alone. He'd accepted a long time ago that his path in life was meant to be a solitary one, and he was okay with that. No additional people meant no additional pain, heartbreak, and hurt. Those that only knew him on a surface level thought that Jon was moody, an asshole, selfish, and standoffish. Jon never bothered to convince them that this wasn't the case, because people thinking this ensured that no one would bother trying to get close to him.
But she'd seen past Jon's facade, and with unwavering love and patience, had slowly made progress with Jon's self-loathing issues. He was never going to be the most well-adjusted person in the world, but that was okay, because his girlfriend didn't expect him to be. For once, Jon Moxley didn't have to be anyone but himself with someone else. It was a foreign feeling, and very scary, but a relief at the same time.
No more pretending. No more lying. Just unconditional, unwavering love.
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