Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Adventures of Pocket-Andy
So this is pretty much what happened last Saturday with my family, save the fact that we didn't have a very tiny Andy to help us along.
So we're sitting in Denny's at like 9 on Saturday morning. This is way too early for a shrimp to be awake and running around for a day off, but here I am! So we're sitting there, eating breakfast. My mom got some weird avocado wrap, I got mozzerella sticks (strange, right? But I'm a shrimp. Deal with it.) and my mother's husband got some combination of bacon and eggs and toast and oatmeal.
Near the end, el toerag (my mothers husband -.-) started to pour the tiny shot glass of milk they gave him into the bowl of oatmeal, before bitching that there wasn't enough milk. So while the toerag flagged down a waitress to bring him more milk, my mother leans slightly across the table and tells me "Don't worry, that's his weird ritual with the oatmeal."
I don't know what made me laugh more, the fact that the toerag has an oatmeal ritual, or the mental image that I was getting. Of course, this mental image was related to the fact that she has said "ritual". Apparently my smirk was showing through, because then she asks, "What's funny?"
So I can't help but tell her "I can't help but feel Andy is going to pop out of nowhere and start singing that song 'Ritual'." She smiles to that thought too, while the toerag continues to eat his oatmeal. Maybe 15 minutes later, we're getting ready to leave. My mom puts her purse onto the table, no doubt to pay for breakfast, or at least to leave the waitress a tip, when to the surprise of all 3 seated at the table, said purse started to sing faintly.
It couldn't be anyone's phone ringing, because my mother's current ringtone was some song by Eminem. No, the singing purse sounded suspiciously like Andy Biersack, but...smaller and squeakier.
You're barely sleeping, no longer dreaming the purse sang. My mother got over her initial "What the hell?" and picked up the fork in one hand, holding it in an attacking position should anything come jumping out. With her other hand, she unzipped the purse. out popped the fluffy head of Set The World On Fire era Andy, still belting out the lines. "Thank God, it was fuckin stuffy in there." the pocket-sized singer said in his somewhat squeaky voice.
"What the hell is that?" my mother asked. Andy turned around and screamed out loud. "AAAAAH! Holy shit!" Both my mother and the toerag let out yells of fear. "Mom, it's Andy... Just....smaller..." I said, trying not to laugh. Poor Andy, meanwhile, looked traumatized. "All I know is that someone started making cracks about 'ritual' so I had to show up to sing it, and now when I do, I almost get killed!" He yelled, not sounding as pissed as he should've, because he was a total of 3 inches tall and squeaky sounding due to being shrunk.
"Yeah, that was like 15 minutes ago." I tell Andy. He gives me a rather pissed look, before saying "I've fucking been stuck in that purse for a while here!" I sighed, before using the tip of my finger to poke Andy's head back into the purse. "That thing isn't going back in my purse." My mother said. There came a muffled "Thank God." From inside the bag.
The toerag reached over and plucked Andy out of the purse, before holding him, squirming and kicking, above the bowl of milk left over from the oatmeal. "What the fuck!" Andy yelled. "Gonna drown this thing." the toerag said, uncaring said thing was a sentinent being, unlike a roach.
"No, no." I yell, reaching out and snatching away the tiny singer. "Don't worry, he'll live in a shoebox below my bed, and I'll make socks for him, and feed him coffee and brownies and tell him bedtime stories."
"Fine, but if I find that thing running around the house, I'm stepping on it." my mother said.
Andy cringed.
So we're sitting in Denny's at like 9 on Saturday morning. This is way too early for a shrimp to be awake and running around for a day off, but here I am! So we're sitting there, eating breakfast. My mom got some weird avocado wrap, I got mozzerella sticks (strange, right? But I'm a shrimp. Deal with it.) and my mother's husband got some combination of bacon and eggs and toast and oatmeal.
Near the end, el toerag (my mothers husband -.-) started to pour the tiny shot glass of milk they gave him into the bowl of oatmeal, before bitching that there wasn't enough milk. So while the toerag flagged down a waitress to bring him more milk, my mother leans slightly across the table and tells me "Don't worry, that's his weird ritual with the oatmeal."
I don't know what made me laugh more, the fact that the toerag has an oatmeal ritual, or the mental image that I was getting. Of course, this mental image was related to the fact that she has said "ritual". Apparently my smirk was showing through, because then she asks, "What's funny?"
So I can't help but tell her "I can't help but feel Andy is going to pop out of nowhere and start singing that song 'Ritual'." She smiles to that thought too, while the toerag continues to eat his oatmeal. Maybe 15 minutes later, we're getting ready to leave. My mom puts her purse onto the table, no doubt to pay for breakfast, or at least to leave the waitress a tip, when to the surprise of all 3 seated at the table, said purse started to sing faintly.
It couldn't be anyone's phone ringing, because my mother's current ringtone was some song by Eminem. No, the singing purse sounded suspiciously like Andy Biersack, but...smaller and squeakier.
You're barely sleeping, no longer dreaming the purse sang. My mother got over her initial "What the hell?" and picked up the fork in one hand, holding it in an attacking position should anything come jumping out. With her other hand, she unzipped the purse. out popped the fluffy head of Set The World On Fire era Andy, still belting out the lines. "Thank God, it was fuckin stuffy in there." the pocket-sized singer said in his somewhat squeaky voice.
"What the hell is that?" my mother asked. Andy turned around and screamed out loud. "AAAAAH! Holy shit!" Both my mother and the toerag let out yells of fear. "Mom, it's Andy... Just....smaller..." I said, trying not to laugh. Poor Andy, meanwhile, looked traumatized. "All I know is that someone started making cracks about 'ritual' so I had to show up to sing it, and now when I do, I almost get killed!" He yelled, not sounding as pissed as he should've, because he was a total of 3 inches tall and squeaky sounding due to being shrunk.
"Yeah, that was like 15 minutes ago." I tell Andy. He gives me a rather pissed look, before saying "I've fucking been stuck in that purse for a while here!" I sighed, before using the tip of my finger to poke Andy's head back into the purse. "That thing isn't going back in my purse." My mother said. There came a muffled "Thank God." From inside the bag.
The toerag reached over and plucked Andy out of the purse, before holding him, squirming and kicking, above the bowl of milk left over from the oatmeal. "What the fuck!" Andy yelled. "Gonna drown this thing." the toerag said, uncaring said thing was a sentinent being, unlike a roach.
"No, no." I yell, reaching out and snatching away the tiny singer. "Don't worry, he'll live in a shoebox below my bed, and I'll make socks for him, and feed him coffee and brownies and tell him bedtime stories."
"Fine, but if I find that thing running around the house, I'm stepping on it." my mother said.
Andy cringed.
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