FicWad

We laid in the comfort of each others arms for 15 minutes. We didn't speak. We didn't touch. We just held each other. I listened as his heart beat started to become steady and
rhythmic. He slowly rubbed my hair back, but that was all.

"Iz?" I finally speak.

"Mhm?"

"I think you're pretty cool."

"That's all?" He opens his chestnut eyes to look at me.

"What am I supposed to say?" I push up off his body and roll to the side of him.

"Nothing. That's fine." He smiles at me and closes his eyes again.

I knew he wasn't telling me something. I could feel he was holding back from the truth. What was I supposed to say? I love you? I want to be with you? Can I be your girlfriend? What?
"I think you're cool too Ace."
Ouch...when he said it, it wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear.

"Thanks...Hey Iz."

"Yes?" He stretches a bit before he puts his boxer briefs back on.

"That thing I read yesterday...did you write it?"

"What thing?"

"It said 'Think About You'."

"Oh. You read it? Yeah I wrote that." He shifts uncomfortably on my bed.

"Cool. Who's it about?" I ask while putting on some jeans from my closet.

"A girl I met."

"Oh...who is she? Do I know her?"

"Nope. No one here knows her." My heart sunk.

I felt like an idiot. I just gave away my innocence to my best friend who maybe I did love...and he likes another girl? Ouch...was I really making the same mistakes as my mom? And so early on too?

"Ah...I gotcha." I sound bored and unpleased.

"Hey...ughh as far as we're concerned...we did nothing, kay?"

My body fills with shock. Was he seriously going to brush this off as nothing? Was he seriously going to pretend that none of this happened? We came together as one person for what seemed eternity, and he was just going to brush it off?!

"Umm...sure." Of course, I couldn't act like it hurt...

Izzy stands up and jumps into his ripped jeans. I still couldn't help but look for the rip by his pocket.

"We're still friends though...right?" I gulp.

"Well yeah. Why wouldn't we be?" He smiles at me before he puts his t-shirt back on.

"I...I don't know."

Izzy comes closer to me. His body towers over mine. He holds my chin up to his face. His warm breath tickles my lips. His fragrance from his clothes wafted past my nose in delight.

"It's not like we love each other...right?" He asks staring deeply into my eyes.

"Oh hell no." I hide back my obvious sadness and truth.

"See." His voice chokes a little.

"No. I completely understand Iz. It was just...heat of the moment stuff."

"Yeah...heat of the moment." He looks down to his feet.

"I should get going...ughh my mom is waiting for me. She thinks I went to go get milk..."

"Oh...yeah sure. No problem." My smile trembles as I hold back everything.

He gets closer to me, but then pulls away. He smiles and kisses my forehead. Fuck I wish he would just kiss me again.

"See you tomorrow?" He asks as he puts his sneakers on.

"Ughh yeah. I guess..."

"Okay...umm, have a good day." He rushes out of the door and closes it behind him.

I walk over to my bedroom door and stare at it. My heart ached with hurt. Maybe I did love him...it wasn't my fault. You can't help who you fall in love with...

"Iz?" I call out loud enough for him to possibly hear me.

There was no reply...