Categories > Celebrities > 30 Seconds to Mars > Just Playing Dead
He had watched her pace by several times even with lights out. He watched her until the sight of her coming back and forth made him dizzy. He knew what she was doing, almost knew who she was simply because of the tattoo on her neck. He couldn't believe how much he had gotten lucky seeing this one girl outside of his room. It was like this was all playing into his hands finally after such a long time of dwelling where he shouldn't, of being lost in the kinds of places he would never have visited before. He was scared still of course but there was a light now, set somewhere down below. He had to crawl to get there, had to do a little scraping of his knees in order to.
He turned his eyes from the small window in the door as he looked around. The walls were white, clean, unmarked. The ground was just the same, light flooding through from the small window. His bed beneath him creaked and his arms were sore in his straitjacket. He wasn't sure why they had restrained him, everything had faded into a vague blur in his mind. He wasn't sure what had actually happened and what had only been a part of his imagination.
He managed to stand up, a weight building on his legs as he set his weight on them. Letting out a small gasp he walked over to the window in the door and lightly rested his head on the Plexiglass. He just stared there, lightly knocking at the glass with his forehead He wasn't sure how he looked right now, he was sure that he looked haggard and rundown no doubt. But the girl, when she stepped forward, didn't flinch away or gasp. It was either because he didn't look as horrible as he felt or because the girl at the other end was too fascinated to be shocked.
He lowered his eyes, watching the lock of the door hoping that she would open the door. She was nodding hurriedly when he looked back up at her and immediately went to unlock it. With a glance around she slowly creaked open the door and stepped inside, making Jared move backwards away from her. She carefully closed it, checking out through the window before she finally looked back to him. Her eyes were widened with a soft happiness and a smile was on her lips.
"Let's get you out of this." She softly said, stepping forward and carefully began to unbuckle the straps of the jacket. She smoothed down the plain white shirt that he was wearing before she draped the jacket over the mattress. When she turned to look back at him she smiled and touched to the tattoo on her neck, a perfectly colored Triad that she seemed to be more than proud of. "I can't believe that you're really here." She said, watching him with excitement, with wonder like she hadn't believed before that he was a real person.
Jared nodded, stretching out his arms with a relaxed sigh. "I can't believe I'm here either." He replied, tiring quickly of small talk. He glanced out the window, no one was approaching, no one was coming back which meant that no one had noticed just yet that she had slipped inside. He was relieved that no one had yet. He needed time, just a little so that he could sort this all out and make sure that he could get out of here. He didn't need anymore sedatives, didn't need straitjackets. He needed his release, he needed to know that he wouldn't be confined when his nightmares were already holding him captive.
"Do you..need anything at all?" She asked, tucking her hair behind her ear as she observed him. There was a sadness growing in her eyes that was softened by her admiration of him. Would she still think that way of him if she knew the descension he was suffering from? Would she still feel this way if she had been the one at his side in place of Harlow, watching him sink to the depths of near insanity when his life had spiraled away from him? He knew that she wouldn't. It took a certain kind of person to keep their adoration alive even through the darkest of times.
He sighed, pushing his hand back through his hair. Even that was like some kind of luxury having been restrained for the past few hours. Was it time now to ask of her what plans he had been filling his head since he had noticed how she kept pacing outside of his room. He swallowed down nervously, knowing that he was perhaps taking for granted the fact of her dedication but what else could he do? He was in a lost situation, darkness swallowing him up. He had no other choice, no other option.
He nodded, despite his hesitation building inside of him. He stepped forward, standing in front of her with leveled eyes. "There is something." He began, lowering his tired and darkened eyes. "Would you help me?" After a short while he looked back up to her, a plea softly written on his features, hope flickering in his eyes. She had to help him. This was his only shot or else he would be left wasting away in here until someone deemed him alright.
She didn't even have to contemplate, her eyes were readied and lit. She gave him a quick nod, eager- perhaps too eager- to help him. She was in a position to help the one person she admired and ad always watched from afar. How could she deny him now when he was standing in front of her seemingly so helpless? She couldn't, she needed him to know that he had people there for him whether he knew them or not. She didn't believe anything they had put out about him in the press. Now was her chance and she was more than willing to accept it.
Sitting at the back of the car he couldn't believe that it had worked. He wasn't sure how much longer they had until security noticed he was missing, how much longer it would take for someone to come after them. But they had the head start, they were already half way to the city. He knew he couldn't go back there though, couldn't go back to wherever this girl lived. He knew she wanted him to, knew that she had high hopes of him staying with her but he just couldn't oblige that. There were things he had to do, things he had to figure out.
Reluctantly she stopped and let him out, driving away at a slow pace in case he would change his mind. He didn't, he couldn't. He was left on the darkened highway, nothing in his pockets and a thin jacket to protect him from the cold. He stuffed his hands into his pockets as a shiver crawled up his spine. He was still so tired but he knew that he had no way of sleeping. Not now. He needed to keep pressing. Needed to get back to his apartment on his own, take his box of evidence and give it over to Shannon, his doctor. He wasn't crazy!
He kept walking, seeing the glitter of the city just ahead. He wasn't too far at all, the only oppression coming from the cold that swirled around him. He felt so weakened by his own fear that he continuously, over and over wished it away. It didn't work, nothing did. He was choked up forever by the fear pressing in on him. How could one man know so much fear? He wasn't sure but it was there resting inside of him and he had no way of ridding himself of it.
A sound from behind him made him stop his footsteps. It stopped when he did. The familiar sound of steps behind him. He tried not to run, tried not to panic but he heard whoever it was come closer and he felt the warmth of their presence. Forcibly he was forced to turn around and that's when Jared yelled out. The man's eyes were intense, his mouth pressed into a harshened smile as he glared across at Jared. He had his hands balled up at his sides and there was a slight tremor in his body.
"Get away from me!" He shouted, trying to move backwards but ending up tripping over his own scrambling. He fell on his back, gasping at the pain searing through his back as he stared up and watched the man lean over him. He touched his hand to the hand that Jared had been injured on but despite his protests he didn't stop. He only continued, grabbing for it and holding it harshly. "It's just you and me Jared. That's it. You and me." He seethed out, his anger dripping from his eyes as he stared down at Jared. "Will you ever learn?" He questioned before he lifted him a little off the ground and threw a punch in his face making him wilt beneath the force.
He turned his eyes from the small window in the door as he looked around. The walls were white, clean, unmarked. The ground was just the same, light flooding through from the small window. His bed beneath him creaked and his arms were sore in his straitjacket. He wasn't sure why they had restrained him, everything had faded into a vague blur in his mind. He wasn't sure what had actually happened and what had only been a part of his imagination.
He managed to stand up, a weight building on his legs as he set his weight on them. Letting out a small gasp he walked over to the window in the door and lightly rested his head on the Plexiglass. He just stared there, lightly knocking at the glass with his forehead He wasn't sure how he looked right now, he was sure that he looked haggard and rundown no doubt. But the girl, when she stepped forward, didn't flinch away or gasp. It was either because he didn't look as horrible as he felt or because the girl at the other end was too fascinated to be shocked.
He lowered his eyes, watching the lock of the door hoping that she would open the door. She was nodding hurriedly when he looked back up at her and immediately went to unlock it. With a glance around she slowly creaked open the door and stepped inside, making Jared move backwards away from her. She carefully closed it, checking out through the window before she finally looked back to him. Her eyes were widened with a soft happiness and a smile was on her lips.
"Let's get you out of this." She softly said, stepping forward and carefully began to unbuckle the straps of the jacket. She smoothed down the plain white shirt that he was wearing before she draped the jacket over the mattress. When she turned to look back at him she smiled and touched to the tattoo on her neck, a perfectly colored Triad that she seemed to be more than proud of. "I can't believe that you're really here." She said, watching him with excitement, with wonder like she hadn't believed before that he was a real person.
Jared nodded, stretching out his arms with a relaxed sigh. "I can't believe I'm here either." He replied, tiring quickly of small talk. He glanced out the window, no one was approaching, no one was coming back which meant that no one had noticed just yet that she had slipped inside. He was relieved that no one had yet. He needed time, just a little so that he could sort this all out and make sure that he could get out of here. He didn't need anymore sedatives, didn't need straitjackets. He needed his release, he needed to know that he wouldn't be confined when his nightmares were already holding him captive.
"Do you..need anything at all?" She asked, tucking her hair behind her ear as she observed him. There was a sadness growing in her eyes that was softened by her admiration of him. Would she still think that way of him if she knew the descension he was suffering from? Would she still feel this way if she had been the one at his side in place of Harlow, watching him sink to the depths of near insanity when his life had spiraled away from him? He knew that she wouldn't. It took a certain kind of person to keep their adoration alive even through the darkest of times.
He sighed, pushing his hand back through his hair. Even that was like some kind of luxury having been restrained for the past few hours. Was it time now to ask of her what plans he had been filling his head since he had noticed how she kept pacing outside of his room. He swallowed down nervously, knowing that he was perhaps taking for granted the fact of her dedication but what else could he do? He was in a lost situation, darkness swallowing him up. He had no other choice, no other option.
He nodded, despite his hesitation building inside of him. He stepped forward, standing in front of her with leveled eyes. "There is something." He began, lowering his tired and darkened eyes. "Would you help me?" After a short while he looked back up to her, a plea softly written on his features, hope flickering in his eyes. She had to help him. This was his only shot or else he would be left wasting away in here until someone deemed him alright.
She didn't even have to contemplate, her eyes were readied and lit. She gave him a quick nod, eager- perhaps too eager- to help him. She was in a position to help the one person she admired and ad always watched from afar. How could she deny him now when he was standing in front of her seemingly so helpless? She couldn't, she needed him to know that he had people there for him whether he knew them or not. She didn't believe anything they had put out about him in the press. Now was her chance and she was more than willing to accept it.
Sitting at the back of the car he couldn't believe that it had worked. He wasn't sure how much longer they had until security noticed he was missing, how much longer it would take for someone to come after them. But they had the head start, they were already half way to the city. He knew he couldn't go back there though, couldn't go back to wherever this girl lived. He knew she wanted him to, knew that she had high hopes of him staying with her but he just couldn't oblige that. There were things he had to do, things he had to figure out.
Reluctantly she stopped and let him out, driving away at a slow pace in case he would change his mind. He didn't, he couldn't. He was left on the darkened highway, nothing in his pockets and a thin jacket to protect him from the cold. He stuffed his hands into his pockets as a shiver crawled up his spine. He was still so tired but he knew that he had no way of sleeping. Not now. He needed to keep pressing. Needed to get back to his apartment on his own, take his box of evidence and give it over to Shannon, his doctor. He wasn't crazy!
He kept walking, seeing the glitter of the city just ahead. He wasn't too far at all, the only oppression coming from the cold that swirled around him. He felt so weakened by his own fear that he continuously, over and over wished it away. It didn't work, nothing did. He was choked up forever by the fear pressing in on him. How could one man know so much fear? He wasn't sure but it was there resting inside of him and he had no way of ridding himself of it.
A sound from behind him made him stop his footsteps. It stopped when he did. The familiar sound of steps behind him. He tried not to run, tried not to panic but he heard whoever it was come closer and he felt the warmth of their presence. Forcibly he was forced to turn around and that's when Jared yelled out. The man's eyes were intense, his mouth pressed into a harshened smile as he glared across at Jared. He had his hands balled up at his sides and there was a slight tremor in his body.
"Get away from me!" He shouted, trying to move backwards but ending up tripping over his own scrambling. He fell on his back, gasping at the pain searing through his back as he stared up and watched the man lean over him. He touched his hand to the hand that Jared had been injured on but despite his protests he didn't stop. He only continued, grabbing for it and holding it harshly. "It's just you and me Jared. That's it. You and me." He seethed out, his anger dripping from his eyes as he stared down at Jared. "Will you ever learn?" He questioned before he lifted him a little off the ground and threw a punch in his face making him wilt beneath the force.
Sign up to rate and review this story