Categories > Celebrities > 30 Seconds to Mars > Untitled
The Goodbye
She left him for last. Looking into those dark brown eyes one last time would kill her, and so Lucy had put it off for as long as she could. Carrying her two red suitcases down the narrow staircase of her shared house, she saw him stood at the door, car keys gripped tightly in his left hand. This was it. She was finally leaving her small house in Cardiff, Wales that she had lived in for three years with friends throughout university, for a new life in New York.
Lucy had dreamt about New York since she was in her teenage years. She dreamt of living in a small apartment in the city and being able to look out at the busy streets below. She dreamt of having a well-paid job thanks to her Law degree she had recently completed. She dreamt of being happy. Lucy had been raised to believe that to be happy you had to follow a path. This path was straightforward and involved no rugged paths that could cause you to trip and fall. You get a good degree, get a good job, live in a good house, marry a good man, and have good children, living in a good neighbourhood. And that was it. But at 3am one night when she was 16, she realised none of this was needed to be happy. You didn’t have to have to be loaded with cash, you just had to do what you want. If you want to step off the path, do it. But it also meant saying goodbye to her family, friends and boyfriend, David.
Silently, David took one of the suitcases from Lucy’s hand, opened the door, and placed it outside next to his second-hand Toyota. Today was the third day that David had not spoken to Lucy. He either had nothing to say to her, or did not know how to say it, and Lucy couldn’t decide which was worse. There was no point in denying that the relationship wasn’t going to work once she had moved, and this killed Lucy inside. She was going to miss David terribly, after all, he was her first proper boyfriend and they had been together since their first year of university. At one point she had tried to persuade David to join her, but he has aspirations too. However, despite all this, he could at least talk to her so they could have a proper goodbye and leave on good terms. She loved him.
David came back inside, his messy brown hair and Muse t-shirt and black skinny jeans, damp from the early morning rain, and reached to take the other suitcase out of Lucy’s hand.
“No,” Lucy moved past him, out of the door. “I’m alright.”
The rain was cold on her skin, and surprisingly Lucy realised that she might actually miss the English rain. The way it trickled down her face, and dripped off her nose, and made her already wavy blonde hair form neat ringlets around her pale face. She ran, or at least tried to run, from the door to David’s car and attempted to lift the suitcases into the boot of David’s car whilst he locked the door. After three unsuccessful attempts of only managing to lift them 3 inches off the ground, David walked over and placed them in the boot for her.
“Thanks,” she breathed before running to the passenger side of the car, opening the door, and clambering in. David shortly followed.
Lucy dared not look at David but she couldn't quite figure out why. Instead she focused on playing with the hem of her damp red skirt between her index and middle fingers. Noticing the goosebumps that now covered her slim body, she wished she had worn something warmer, but knew that she would have regretted once she landed in New York. The heat was immense over there compared to home.
As David started the engine, Lucy stole one last glance at her house, before they began their hour long journey to the airport.
The only sound heard in the car was the sound of raindrops hammering against the small car. Lucy wished she could break the deafening silence between David and her but despite all the things she wanted to say, questions to ask, she just couldn’t get her mouth to work.
Finally, David broke the silence. “I’m sorry,” he sighed. “It’s just... I’m going to miss you so much... I love you... You- you know that, right?”
The corners of Lucy’s mouth turned upwards and she slowly turned her head towards David noticing the stubble that covered his lower face. “Of course I do, you idiot.” She reached over and placed her hand on David’s arm, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Second thoughts suddenly started filling her mind. They were the only things she could hear. Maybe I shouldn’t go. Maybe I should just stay with David. No. She had to do this. “I wish I could stay Dave, I really do, but this is my dream.”
She’d told him this almost every day. This was the only thing that was stopping her from cancelling her flight and returning home to spend the rest of her life with David.
“And this is my dream!” David raised his voice all of a sudden. Even he was surprised at the sudden surge of anger that filled his body, his hands tensed round the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white. “Or at least it was anyway. Haven’t you ever considered that?” David was glad he had to keep his eyes on the road. He knew just one look into Lucy’s big deep blue eyes and he would break down then and there. “My dream was to move to a nice house, and have a good job, and get married, and have kids... And I want to do all those things with you!”
“And you still can,” Lucy returned to analysing the stitches on the hem of her skirt, her voice quietening. “...Just not with me.”
Silence once again filled the interior of the car. After a few seconds Lucy quickly glanced at David. He was chewing his lower lip. She’d known him long enough now to know that this was a sign that he was clearly hurt.
She sighed. “I’m sorry, that came out wrong.”
“No it didn’t.”
This time, Lucy turned her upper body towards David, or as much as she could due to her restricting seatbelt. His usually pale skin was still slightly tanned from the holiday she, David, and their friends had shared in France. His jaw was tense and his light brown messy hair was messier than normal. Dark circles surrounded his eyes indicating his lack of sleep. A rush of guilt flooded Lucy’s head, she had caused this.
David was blinking more than usual, Lucy also noticed, blinking back tears. She reached out to place her hand on top of his, which was currently gripping the gear stick. David immediately pulled away, reaching for the CD player, trying to make his cold gesture a little less, well, cold. Music filled the car through the small speakers. Lucy recognised the song immediately. I won’t suffer, be broken, get tired, or wasted. Surrender to nothing, or give up what I started and stopped it, from end to beginning. A new day is coming, and I am finally free. It was Attack, the opening track to Thirty Seconds To Mars’ album A Beautiful Lie. Sudden memories of her and David’s first meeting came back to her. She looked up at him and could see the nostalgia in his eyes.
David laughed, breaking the tense silence. “Man, I was so drunk that night.” Lucy began laughing with him, remember how he had acted.
She left him for last. Looking into those dark brown eyes one last time would kill her, and so Lucy had put it off for as long as she could. Carrying her two red suitcases down the narrow staircase of her shared house, she saw him stood at the door, car keys gripped tightly in his left hand. This was it. She was finally leaving her small house in Cardiff, Wales that she had lived in for three years with friends throughout university, for a new life in New York.
Lucy had dreamt about New York since she was in her teenage years. She dreamt of living in a small apartment in the city and being able to look out at the busy streets below. She dreamt of having a well-paid job thanks to her Law degree she had recently completed. She dreamt of being happy. Lucy had been raised to believe that to be happy you had to follow a path. This path was straightforward and involved no rugged paths that could cause you to trip and fall. You get a good degree, get a good job, live in a good house, marry a good man, and have good children, living in a good neighbourhood. And that was it. But at 3am one night when she was 16, she realised none of this was needed to be happy. You didn’t have to have to be loaded with cash, you just had to do what you want. If you want to step off the path, do it. But it also meant saying goodbye to her family, friends and boyfriend, David.
Silently, David took one of the suitcases from Lucy’s hand, opened the door, and placed it outside next to his second-hand Toyota. Today was the third day that David had not spoken to Lucy. He either had nothing to say to her, or did not know how to say it, and Lucy couldn’t decide which was worse. There was no point in denying that the relationship wasn’t going to work once she had moved, and this killed Lucy inside. She was going to miss David terribly, after all, he was her first proper boyfriend and they had been together since their first year of university. At one point she had tried to persuade David to join her, but he has aspirations too. However, despite all this, he could at least talk to her so they could have a proper goodbye and leave on good terms. She loved him.
David came back inside, his messy brown hair and Muse t-shirt and black skinny jeans, damp from the early morning rain, and reached to take the other suitcase out of Lucy’s hand.
“No,” Lucy moved past him, out of the door. “I’m alright.”
The rain was cold on her skin, and surprisingly Lucy realised that she might actually miss the English rain. The way it trickled down her face, and dripped off her nose, and made her already wavy blonde hair form neat ringlets around her pale face. She ran, or at least tried to run, from the door to David’s car and attempted to lift the suitcases into the boot of David’s car whilst he locked the door. After three unsuccessful attempts of only managing to lift them 3 inches off the ground, David walked over and placed them in the boot for her.
“Thanks,” she breathed before running to the passenger side of the car, opening the door, and clambering in. David shortly followed.
Lucy dared not look at David but she couldn't quite figure out why. Instead she focused on playing with the hem of her damp red skirt between her index and middle fingers. Noticing the goosebumps that now covered her slim body, she wished she had worn something warmer, but knew that she would have regretted once she landed in New York. The heat was immense over there compared to home.
As David started the engine, Lucy stole one last glance at her house, before they began their hour long journey to the airport.
The only sound heard in the car was the sound of raindrops hammering against the small car. Lucy wished she could break the deafening silence between David and her but despite all the things she wanted to say, questions to ask, she just couldn’t get her mouth to work.
Finally, David broke the silence. “I’m sorry,” he sighed. “It’s just... I’m going to miss you so much... I love you... You- you know that, right?”
The corners of Lucy’s mouth turned upwards and she slowly turned her head towards David noticing the stubble that covered his lower face. “Of course I do, you idiot.” She reached over and placed her hand on David’s arm, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Second thoughts suddenly started filling her mind. They were the only things she could hear. Maybe I shouldn’t go. Maybe I should just stay with David. No. She had to do this. “I wish I could stay Dave, I really do, but this is my dream.”
She’d told him this almost every day. This was the only thing that was stopping her from cancelling her flight and returning home to spend the rest of her life with David.
“And this is my dream!” David raised his voice all of a sudden. Even he was surprised at the sudden surge of anger that filled his body, his hands tensed round the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white. “Or at least it was anyway. Haven’t you ever considered that?” David was glad he had to keep his eyes on the road. He knew just one look into Lucy’s big deep blue eyes and he would break down then and there. “My dream was to move to a nice house, and have a good job, and get married, and have kids... And I want to do all those things with you!”
“And you still can,” Lucy returned to analysing the stitches on the hem of her skirt, her voice quietening. “...Just not with me.”
Silence once again filled the interior of the car. After a few seconds Lucy quickly glanced at David. He was chewing his lower lip. She’d known him long enough now to know that this was a sign that he was clearly hurt.
She sighed. “I’m sorry, that came out wrong.”
“No it didn’t.”
This time, Lucy turned her upper body towards David, or as much as she could due to her restricting seatbelt. His usually pale skin was still slightly tanned from the holiday she, David, and their friends had shared in France. His jaw was tense and his light brown messy hair was messier than normal. Dark circles surrounded his eyes indicating his lack of sleep. A rush of guilt flooded Lucy’s head, she had caused this.
David was blinking more than usual, Lucy also noticed, blinking back tears. She reached out to place her hand on top of his, which was currently gripping the gear stick. David immediately pulled away, reaching for the CD player, trying to make his cold gesture a little less, well, cold. Music filled the car through the small speakers. Lucy recognised the song immediately. I won’t suffer, be broken, get tired, or wasted. Surrender to nothing, or give up what I started and stopped it, from end to beginning. A new day is coming, and I am finally free. It was Attack, the opening track to Thirty Seconds To Mars’ album A Beautiful Lie. Sudden memories of her and David’s first meeting came back to her. She looked up at him and could see the nostalgia in his eyes.
David laughed, breaking the tense silence. “Man, I was so drunk that night.” Lucy began laughing with him, remember how he had acted.
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