FicWad

Road to Mount Gagazet

Late night. In the trees. Waiting for Raine.
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[/ Knowing it might be awhile, he got comfortable on the stump he casually referred to as "his stump," at least when he set out to look for it. It was just the right height for his legs and wide enough for his ass and far enough back in the woods to not be spotted at night, but still close enough to see the cliff-side view of Zanarkand City…
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[/ …and Jory's car. There were few students at Raine's school who had their own car and Auron often wondered if that was part of Jory's allure for Raine, who had been raised on a frugal budget. Most Zanarkand residents relied on public transportation, but those who lived ocean-side like the Drakes had one or two sleek machina vehicles at their disposal.
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[/ Jory was parked at an angle so the back end didn't hang into the scenic-view road. Auron knew this road best from pilgrimages. In Spira, the road lead up to Mount Gagazet, home to the Ronsos, but here, the road drove over a high bluff straight down into the rough ocean, like the mountain had been evenly carved away from Zanarkand with a colossal masamune.
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[/ Auron ended up here a few times a month during the high school Blitzball season, when Raine was allowed a later curfew to cheer at the late games. Jory would bring her here until it was time to take her home and Auron would admire Zanarkand's sprawling design of twinkling downtown lights, trying not to think too hard about what was happening inside Jory's car. In fact, he had himself foolishly convinced that all they were doing was talking and conveniently put any light petting that would likely ensue to the back of his mind. Thinking about it, he was liable to break a tooth from clenching his jaw.
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[/ Tonight, they were cutting it close. Usually by now, Jory had at least started the vehicle and turned on the headlights in preparation for the drive home, but the car was still dark. Still. A low sound Auron couldn't quite interpret mildly alerted him but he stayed seated on his stump and didn't interfere.
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[/Auron, if this doesn't work, if I'm reborn as Sin, bring Raine back on your next pilgrimage.
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[/I give you my word. I'll take care of your sister. I will protect her with my life.
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[/ It was the same promise he'd made to Jecht about Tidus.
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[/ He had been an active guardian to Tidus, more so than to Raine, but unlike Raine's mother, her great aunt and uncle were suitable caregivers and Raine was generally old enough to mind herself. Auron considered him little more than a failsafe, to keep Raine out of direct and unforeseeable danger. To Auron, this arrangement seemed the most appropriate.
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[/ Lifting his head to another low noise, Auron turned his head a fraction to better center his halved-vision on Jory's vehicle, noticing a small commotion in the back seat, silhouettes interposing the windshield against the luminous Zanarkand backdrop. His belly dipped queerly as he rotated on his stump, as though turning away could deny what was happening down below, and his mind scurried back to Tidus. How did he handle this with Tidus? Honestly, he didn't recall it ever coming up. Before Yuna, Tidus' love life was relatively modest and when women approached him for autographs, he regarded them with professional charm.
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[/ Recognizing Raine wasn't in immediate danger, Auron resolved to concentrate on his own business in this regard, but he forgot everything when Raine's shriek sliced the night. Everything blurred red as Auron bobbed under a low branch, vaulted over another, until he had the backseat door open and could better hear Raine's light giggles from within. By then it was too late. For the rest of his so-called life, what he saw in the backseat would often swim unbidden to the front of his mind.
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[/ Another scream from Raine, this time because of Auron, and a disoriented Jory tried to simultaneously look over his shoulder and wrench his pants up. Seizing him by the back of his letter jacket, Auron hauled Jory out of the backseat, ignoring his flopping genitalia, and inclined back inside for Raine. Fully dressed in her cheerleading outfit, she modestly pinned her knees together, before Auron saw more than he needed to.
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[/ "Auron," she said, more surprised than angry.
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[/ He extended his hand to her. "Come."
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[/ "Did something happen?" she questioned, taking his hand firmly and scooting out.
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[/ "Who do you think you are?" Jory cried. His belt was loose, but he had pulled his trousers up at least. "Do you know this joker, Raine?"
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[/ "I do," she said, holding up a hand to calm her boyfriend. "Can you just give me a second?"
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[/ Trembling with hostility, Jory buckled his belt and glared at Auron.
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[/ "Are you hurt?" Auron asked her.
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[/ "Hey, I didn't hurt her!" Jory said, pointing Raine out to Auron.
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[/ Auron overlooked him, swatting ambiguously.
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[/ Apparently unaccustomed to being ignored, Jory slammed the back door of his car and squatted down to wipe something imaginary from his shiny paint job with the ribbed cuff of his jacket. When the speck was gone, he resentfully tisked and circled around to wait in the driver's seat.
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[/ "Me? I'm fine," Raine said, more focused on Auron than the childish rants of her boyfriend. "What's happening?"
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[/ "I…heard a scream."
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[/ "Oh." Raine glanced distractedly at the car as Jory started it and flipped on the headlights, then flinched apologetically at Auron. "Oh."
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[/ "I thought—" Auron began and tightly shook his head. He realized his gauntlet had curled into a fist and he forced himself to relax it.
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[/ Circumstances seemed so much more somber in the dim light of roving Pyreflies, after a hysterically reluctant Summoner had sentenced a Guardian to become Sin. "I will protect her with my life" seemed a perfectly legitimate promise to make then, but now, he just felt silly.
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[/ "Shit, Auron," Raine said with a great exhale of relief, sagging, her hands on her knees. "I thought someone died."
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[/ "It wasn't my intension to frighten you."
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[/ She skewed her head slyly. "What was your intension?"
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[/ He shifted away and didn't answer.
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[/ The white brake lights blinked as Jory put the car in gear.
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[/ "You should go," Auron said and angled his head towards the vehicle.
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[/ Straightening, Raine put her hands on her hips. "What are you doing out here, Auron? Do you need a ride back to town?"
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[/ Before he could say no, the wheels on Jory's car spun in the gravel as he punched the accelerator and a moment later, his red tail lights disappeared down the curve of the dirt road.
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[/ "Really, Jory?" Raine muttered to herself. "Well, there goes my ride." Holding her elbows, she hurried into the cloud of dust.
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[/ Auron followed her. "Where are you going?"
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[/ "My curfew's in twenty minutes. If I hurry, I can catch the train."
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[/ "Trains stopped running an hour ago."
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[/ "Dammit." Her speed increased just enough for Auron to notice and he lengthened his strides. "I hate it when Jory gets like this. So moody."
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[/ "I'm sorry I interfered. You've been very…patient. More than I deserve."
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[/ "No worries," she said with an insouciant shrug that reminded him of Tidus. In her profile, Auron recognized Tidus' slightly upturned nose, the contour of his chin and, of course, the bleach blonde of his hair, but her likeness to Tidus faded promptly when she said: "It was the blind leading the blind in Jory's backseat. It wasn't going to end happily for me, if you know what I mean."
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[/ "I do," Auron said grimly. "More than I care to."
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[/ "Sorry," she said, although the twist of her lips as she smothered a smile told Auron she was not as sorry as he was supposed to believe. She began rubbing her arms.
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[/ "Don't you have a jacket?"
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[/ "I did. I had underwear, too, until Jory drove away with them."
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[/ Auron pursed his lips, swung forward his katana, stabbing the end of the scabbard into the dirt. "Hold this," he said to her.
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[/ The sword was almost as tall as her and she hugged it against her uncertainly, like she was struggling to hold a drunken stranger on his feet.
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[/ Auron unclasped his obi belt and removed his great coat. "This will keep you warm," he said as he handed it over and took back the sword. He slid his arm back through the sheath's leather strap and flipped the sword to his back.
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[/ "What about you?"
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[/ "I don't get cold."
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[/ Sliding her arms into the sleeves, her hands didn't quite reach the cuffs and he had to buckle up the sleeve he usually kept loose so they were both functional. She wrapped the cloak around her like a robe, not bothering to cinch it with the belt, the hem almost dragging on the ground. "It's lighter than it looks. Soft inside. Satin?"
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[/ "I think."
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[/ "I've never seen you without your coat," she said, eying the sleeveless leather cuirass he wore underneath. "You seem…younger."
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[/ Auron didn't know how to respond and listened to the rhythmic crunch of gravel under them. At the bottom of the mountain, the faint dirt road transitioned into cobblestone for a few hundred feet, then smoothed into a basket-weave of multicolored brick that covered most of Zanarkand's street level.
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[/ "What were you doing up there anyway?" Raine asked.
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[/ "Nice view."
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[/ "I bet." Her surreptitious eyes skimmed up to his. "Are you following me?"
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[/ "I'm walking you home."
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[/ "You promised my old ma—I mean, my father-you'd watch Tidus. Did you promise him you'd watch me, too?"
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[/ He knew she might piece it together eventually, just not so quickly. "Not your father," he sighed. "Tidus."
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[/ "My brother's alive?" Her eyes revitalized a miniscule.
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[/ He closed his eye to revise himself. "I promised Tidus if anything happened to him, I would look after you."
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[/ "You really know how to keep a promise, don't you?"
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[/ "I try."
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[/ "So where do you live?"
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[/ "I don't live anywhere."
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[/"You're homeless?"
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[/He nodded sideways. "I suppose."
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[/ She passed him a sad half-smile. "Where do you sleep?"
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[/ "I don't sleep much."
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[/ "Eat?"
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[/ "I don't eat, either."
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[/ "Where do you get your mail?"
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[/ He chuckled and she smiled.
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[/ "If you don't live anywhere, where are you from?"
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[/ Auron paused a pulse too long.
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[/ "G-west?"
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[/ He didn't answer.
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[/ "A-east?"
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[/ "Yes," he said, before she went through all the districts of town, including Central Zanarkand and the Marina.
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[/ She made a face. "Oh, you are not, you're just saying you are. Why don't you want me to know where you're from? I mean, who cares what side of town you used to live in? Unless you're not from Zanarkand." She laughed.
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[/ Auron looked straight down the street, the bright lights of the city coming up ahead.
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[/ She gasped. "Is that it? But Zanarkand is all there is…unless you count the sea, I guess…if you live on a boat…"
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[/Raine stopped. Auron stopped.
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[/ "Are you from a different world?" she accused. She appeared small in his cloak, her dark expression demanding the truth, her eyes blue like Tidus', only razor sharp, clear focus, always thinking.
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[/ Inwardly sighing, Auron said, "I'm from a city called Bevelle."
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[/ "You are from another world!" Her face lit up, her smile gaping. "Boy, you really hold your cards close, don't you?"
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[/ He suppressed a smirk.
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[/ "Did Tidus know?"
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[/ "Not until he was older." Auron realized Raine was the same age Tidus was when he came to Spira, joined a pilgrimage and ultimately became Sin. But it really wasn't about age. Auron didn't want to spoil her life while she was still in Zanarkand. Eight years was a long time from now.
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[/ "I bet that shocked him."
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[/ "You're more percipient than your brother. And he didn't ask as many questions."
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[/ "What can I say?" she grinned. "I got all the brains. He got all the looks."
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[/ Auron did a double-take to see if she was being serious. He wouldn't necessarily say that.
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[/ Raine resumed walking and Auron shadowed. "Street-walk or skywalk?"
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[/ "Skywalk is faster."
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[/ Strangely, Raine spent a long moment considering before finally veering up the gradual incline of the skywalk. Auron thought she was in a hurry.
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[/ Spotlights alternated sides every twenty feet and there were colored lines on the walkway to make navigating the skywalks easier. At night, downtown Zanarkand had a gentle, peachy glow from the lights and all the buildings were goblet-shaped with rings of windows like decorative marbled bands. The water tumbling from the circled rooftops cascaded to unseen basins and fountains on the street level.
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[/ Now it was all rebuilt, but Auron had taken this route to the Blitzball Stadium when Sin came tearing through the central downtown area, ripping up the streets and collapsing buildings with projectiles of Sinscale cocoons. That had been Jecht's reign as Sin. Jecht wanted Tidus to see what he could do, the damage he could accomplish and at first Tidus thought he was being arrogant, but Auron knew Jecht wanted to give Tidus a good reason to stop Sin. In eight years, when it was time to take Raine across the portal, would Tidus do the same to persuade her to defeat Sin?
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[/ And as a Summoner, no less. Anything else would have been much simpler. So many angles to consider with a Summoner: her level of faith, sacrifice and a suitable bond for a Final Aeon at the end. But it was what Tidus wanted and it was becoming clearer to Auron it might not have been a blind request. She would pick up the sending dance quickly and Auron had already been prepared to become Yuna's Final Aeon, but Tidus' bond with her trumped his. Perhaps this time would be different. Presently, Auron cared for Raine, his love for her familial, like his love for Tidus. Throughout his life, everyone Auron cared for eventually died. Maybe Tidus had known Raine might be Auron's final chance to break Sin's cycle of death.
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[/ But to force Raine to join a fight she knew nothing about? Of course, he had done the same with Tidus and Auron had to at least give Raine the chance to do the right thing. Auron could only take it a day at a time; he did not know what the future held right now.
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[/ Shaking her head, Raine said, "I knew you couldn't be from around here. You're so weird."
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[/ "Weird?"
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[/ She swung towards him contritely. "A good weird."
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[/ "'A good weird,'" he said insipidly. "I feel so much better."
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[/ She giggled. "Do you have to go back?"
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[/ "Eventually."
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[/ "When?"
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[/ "Eight years."
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[/ When she didn't reply right away, Auron glanced over. She was looking down at her hands, counting fingers.
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[/ "In eight years, I'll be 25…." She didn't say it with the wistful dreaminess of a young girl contemplating her adult years; she said it with an odd solidity, like she was reminding him.
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[/ "I can count too. And without fingers."
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[/ She made a face at him, stuck out her tongue. "I may be Brainy Rainy, but math is my weakness. Tell me about where you live."
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[/ "It's…far."
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[/ "I see. Not ready to tell me about it, huh? Let's try another card, then. Tell me about your family. Do they live in…what was it?"
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[/ "Bevelle."
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[/ "Right. Do you have family there?"
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[/ "My parents are dead."
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[/ "Siblings?"
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[/ "None."
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[/ "Only child, eh? Were you spoiled?"
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[/ "How is that relevant?"
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[/ "Okay, you weren't spoiled. Married?"
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[/ Looking sideways down at her, he said, "I believe that's another card entirely."
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[/ "Nice try, but your wife counts as family."
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[/ "I'm not married."
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[/ She nodded knowingly. "So divorced?"
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[/ "I never married. I was…engaged for a while." The word "engaged" sounded bizarre coming out of his mouth.
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[/ "To who?"
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[/ "It was arranged. She was the high priest's daughter. I was a warrior monk."
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[/ "I see. Marrying up, were you?"
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[/ Shaking his head, he resisted a smile. To have some of the toughest times of his life summed up so simply and nonchalantly made him realize how much time had passed since then. Raine was also being unusually familiar with him tonight and it surprised him he didn't completely hate it.
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[/ "What happened?"
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[/ "My beliefs no longer aligned with those from Bevelle and when I declined the marriage I was exiled."
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[/ "Whoops," she said and grinned. "I think I just peeked at your religion card."
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[/ "You play dirty."
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[/ "Oh, you have no idea," Raine said sinisterly.
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[/ Auron was aware of a peculiar vibe coming from her, but it was gone before he could read it, and she threw her arm in front of him, pointing down a fork in the skyway vein.
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[/ "C-South is that way," she said and steered him in the right direction. They walked for a full minute in silence, but Auron could tell from the suspended tension she wasn't done with her questions. "Was she pretty?"
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[/ "Who?"
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[/ "The high-priest's daughter."
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[/ "How is that—"
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[/ "It is relevant, because I'm asking," she simpered.
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[/ Auron sighed. "The high-priest's daughter was pretty, but we had little in common."
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[/ "Oh." She sounded strangely bitter. "Do you have a girlfriend?"
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[/ "No."
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[/ "Do you want a girlfriend?"
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[/ Auron faced her as he walked and a strange cocktail of reactions came over him.
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[/ Flushing, her eyes flicked to his. "I mean, watching me must take up a lot of your time. You must get lonely hanging out in the bushes all day long."
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[/ "Solitude suits me."
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[/ "Well it doesn't suit me. I promise I'll only ask half as many questions next time if you come into the open more often."
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[/ "Hmph."
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[/ Mist from the nearest skyscraper waterfall wafted in their direction and tiny beads collected on his glasses. He removed them and noticed Raine had stopped a few paces back. She was leaned on the half-wall, staring at the story-high screen on one of the plaza buildings, watching silent replays of some of Tidus's old Blitzball games. Wiping the lenses of his sunglasses on his trousers, Auron simply waited, keeping his eye trained on a group of young adults heading the opposite way.
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[/ "Don't you think sometimes we were put here just to play Blitzball?"
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[/ Auron tightened, said nothing and slid his sunglasses back over his ears, filtering out big city lights.
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[/ "I mean, everything in Zanarkand revolves around it. Maybe it's different for other worlds. What does your world focus on?"
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[/ "Priorities are diverse," he said, hoping to dispel her curiosity about her existence. "We should keep moving."
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[/ "I'm already so late…" Raine drifted, running her hand languidly along the wall as she strolled.
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[/Something on the other side of the skywalk snagged her attention and Auron craned his head back to glance over his collar. A young couple held hands as they sauntered by.
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[/ "They seem happy," she said.
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[/ "Give them time," Auron muttered and picked up his pace as they neared the end of the skywalk. C-South was a sleepy family neighborhood with properly lit streets but most of the houses were dark at this hour. Raine's house still had the porch light on, however, and Auron stopped at the edge of the property in case her custodians were waiting up.
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[/ Raine pointed with her thumb. "Do you want to come in?"
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[/ "No, thanks."
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[/ "I'll tell them you're a friend of my dad's. I mean, you are. And I might get in less trouble for missing curfew if they knew you were with me."
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[/ "I'd rather not."
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[/ "Oh, okay. But you might not see me for a while on account of my grounding."
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[/ "I will see you on your way to school."
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[/ "Will I see you?"
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[/ "Maybe," she said with a concrete nod. He would definitely think about it.
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[/ "Oh. Here." She tugged her hands out of his cloak sleeves and took it off and as she self-consciously smoothed the pleats in her skirt, Auron suddenly remembered she wasn't wearing underwear. It was an unsolicited thought that popped into his mind. "Thanks for the loan."
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[/ Auron draped his coat over his arm for now. She seemed to be lingering.
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[/ Biting her lip nervously, she clasped her hands together behind her back. "You know, when I was a kid, I had such a crush on you."
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[/ "I know." He stifled his smile behind his collar so it didn't reach his eyes.
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[/ "Oh." With a miserable grin, she blushed and touched her forehead. "Did I just make this weird?"
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[/ "Only for you."
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[/ She tapped her lips thoughtfully with her index finger. "I bet it takes a lot to embarrass you."
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[/ "Tonight came close."
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[/ She laughed. "I'll be more discreet from now on."
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[/ "Hmm." For some reason, this didn't make him feel better.
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[/ Coyly smiling, she said, "Hey, put your hand out."
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[/ Puzzled, Auron shifted his cloak to the other arm, adjusted the strap of his scabbard on his shoulder, and held up his fingers.
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[/ She mirrored him. "Do you remember this?"
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[/ "Hmm," he said and nodded once.
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[/ Her palm hovered next to his for a beat before she sealed the heel of her hand to his, matching up their fingers. She felt smooth against his rough callouses and her fingernails had been professionally groomed and painted red.
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[/Look, Owen, I'm catching up!
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[/ "I can't believe I'm about to say this," Raine said with an insecure giggle, "but when I was little, I used to think when my hands got as big as yours, that I would be…big enough for you."
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[/ Instantly, Auron dropped his hand. His belly was being slowly wrung out like a bloody towel after cleaning a wound. A steady unease, a warning.
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[/ Hand still up in an awkward wave, Raine took the rejection with her usual timid grace and a tight smile. "Still not big enough, I guess."
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[/ Auron nodded upwardly towards her house. "Good night, Raine."
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[/ "Good night, Auron."

Room 4, Rin's Travel Agency, Macalania

Marginally dazed, Auron sunk into the end of the bed, reflecting on the smooth, creamy flex of Raine's shoulder blades when she stripped off her shirt. Groping absently around the bed-spread for his boot, Auron tried working on the knot in the lace, but a minute later, he found himself still staring at the footwear like it was a spare piece of machina.

It bewildered Auron how the two of them had gone as long as they did as housemates without a single accidental walk-in, although the merit was all Auron's. He didn't shower often because the only bathroom was off the master bedroom and there was always something intimate hanging off the shower rod, which he made sure to replace when he was finished, and he only showered while she was at work because he didn't trust she would be as careful as he was, or that she even wanted to be. She owned a heavy robe, but didn't use it quite as often as Auron would have liked, and in the summers she asserted that because she lived on a houseboat, a swimsuit was always appropriate attire. But she would dress the way she would dress even if he hadn't been living there and he had to remind himself daily it was the best way to keep her protected. However, the nights when Jory stayed over Auron often spent sitting on the front deck and some nights a long walk around the boardwalk was the best course of action.

Sweet Raine. Nobody could distract him the way she could, and with such little effort.

Flinching, Auron pressed the heel of his hand into his temple, the shrill fret of Pyreflies momentarily excruciating, the worst of it so far. They hadn't bothered him so much on his last pilgrimage, but he'd been far more focused then. Now he was less so.

Grateful for the knock at the door to interrupt his reverie, Auron jumped up entirely too fast and in his haste, he failed to ask for identification before swinging open the door.

"Rin," Auron grunted, a poor greeting, and hopped out of the way as the innkeeper rolled a wooden cart over the threshold. It was filled with covered plates, sets of flatware swathed in cloth napkins, a cluster of condiments on the center rack. "We didn't order anything."

"Sir Auron, in my Travel Agencies, Summoners eat free."

Auron raised an eyebrow. "Since when?"

"Since the new lot of Summoners dispatched, of course," he said with a virtuous ring, innocently widening his light green eyes with the curled irises. Rin parked the cart, moved their coats from the table to the bed and began assembling the table with a feast of covered platters.

With a stab of guilt, Auron realized Raine hadn't eaten all day.

"Where have you been hiding yourself these last eleven years?" Rin asked conversationally.

"Fulfilling a promise," Auron said, guarded, acutely aware of Rin's eyes as they stopped on various places of interest in the room: the bed's tangled coverlet, their weapons propped in the corner by the door, the lace garter sitting twisted on the bedside table, long blonde hairs snarled in the elastic. None of it meant anything, but Auron could see the cogs rotating behind Rin's small eyes. Let the Al Behd man think what he wanted. "Speaking of which, have there been many Sin spottings lately?"

"Not lately, but then…" Rin drifted.

Auron waited with a stitch of impatience for the innkeeper to finish as Rin aligned all the condiments to the center of the table.

Pinching his chin, Rin stared thoughtfully down at the table as if admiring the place settings. "But then, Sin's habits are not as you would expect."

"His habits?"

"How would you characterize Tidus?" Rin asked.

Auron didn't know the relevancy of his question and just shrugged.

"Boisterous? Outgoing? Candid?"

"Sure."

"Not unlike his father?"

"I suppose."

"Logical, then, to assume this Sin would behave much like the last?"

"What are you getting at?" Auron asked, reigning in aggravation.

"Sin doesn't make as many, shall I say…appearances as he used to. From what I've heard, he spends most of his time at the bottom of the ocean. There have been attacks, of course, random and senseless as ever, but the assaults are usually stealthy and unanticipated and the overall damage is much less than normal. It's like Sin is showing restraint."

"Hmph," Auron said and gazed at the floor in thought. Tidus displaying control? Rin was right; it didn't sound like Tidus at all. But it did sound a little like Raine.

Rin's square jaw and wide lips were gravely set as he swung around to face Auron. "Sir Auron, let's be real."

"Let's." Auron crossed his arms.

"Yevon is not keen on plucking citizens from…Zanarkand for Sin rebirths. I can't say the Al Behd is, either. A father and a son and now…a sister, perhaps?"

"Have you forgotten High Summoners Braska and Yuna were father and daughter?"

"Summoners train for years knowing they will die if they succeed. How long has your new Summoner had to come to grips with her sacrifice? Or Tidus? Or Jecht for that matter?"

Auron's jaw clenched. Strong opinions for a man who used Summoners as promotional devices. "Tidus and Jecht were aware of the consequences."

"And this woman? Tell me, does your Summoner even know what the inside of a temple looks like?"

Auron answered with a raspy chuckle.

"Are any of the other Guardians from your previous pilgrimage joining you?"

He had parted ways with them after leaving Zanarkand Ruins and hadn't seen them since, but he anticipated bumping into them again on this upcoming pilgrimage with Raine. "It's best if we stayed a duo."

Finished setting the table, Rin positioned the cart by the door and initiated the brakes on the wheels. "Surely you overestimate your own skills. Bringing an amateur into the battlefield is suicide and without the benefit of a Calm to follow." Rin's eyes narrowed keenly. "Does she at least know of your…condition?"

Clamping his teeth, Auron gave Rin a hard look. The rustlings of Pyreflies grew even more restless in him just then, as if they had been eavesdropping and could recognize when they were being referred to.

Rin cast his eyes down, the practiced patronizing action of a shop owner who believed the customer was always right. "Forgive me, I've overstepped my bounds. Allow me." Rin indicated to the coats he'd cleared from the table top, Raine's brown hide and Auron's red cloak, and brought them to the closet.

While the Al Behd innkeeper busied himself with porter duties, Auron approached the table, curiously lifted a few of the covers. Pork roast, corn on the cob, sweet potatoes, strawberry cobbler and sweetened ice tea with lemon; it was enough for at least four people.

"Ahhh," Rin sang emphatically, oozing innuendo, as he held open the closet door.

Auron looked up from the banquet and cursed to himself. Raine's torn dress was hard to miss, a slash of blinding white in the closet, a faint musty smell wafting into the room. Damned dress never left him alone, and it taunted him, reminded him of everything that went wrong in Zanarkand.

With an admiring gaze, Rin caressed the fabric, evaluating the craftsmanship. "So it is a traditional pilgrimage, just like Zaon and Yunalesca."

"Leave it," Auron grated, oddly protective of the garment, despite the aggravation it caused him.

"Excuse me, Sir Auron." He had the grace to seem embarrassed. "I should have asked permission."

Auron heard the shower stop with a screech of the faucet. He stalked to the door and opened it to encourage Rin to leave. "Thank you for the meal. The Summoner will be pleased," Auron said through his teeth.

Passing Auron, Rin handed him back the coats and said, "I hear romantic love is the best bond for the Final Summoning."

"Out."

Rin smiled in spite of himself and disappeared into the hall.

Pyreflies flaring, Auron felt faintly nauseated as he shut the door, and tossed the coats over one of the stools. He waded through the sickness to the closet, kicking the dress back inside. He managed to latch the closet door just as Raine entered the room, a hot billowing fog trailing after her, and the Pyreflies subsided. Funny, the way the Pyreflies were so intensely aware of Raine's vicinity. Auron suspected they fancied her, like restless puppies when their owner was away. Interesting how Sin had the opposite effect on Auron's Pyreflies, provoking them like attack dogs at a fence, however it was useful for alerting Auron when Sin was close to Zanarkand.

Raine's brown flannel sleepwear was buttoned all the way to her neck, the sleeves hung passed her knuckles, her body drowned in thick, soft fabric, hiding everything. Flinging the towel over her shoulder, she wouldn't look at him as she stomped to the bedside table for her garter, aiming her back to him as she tied back her wet hair.

She didn't play this game often, but he knew it well enough to know her feelings were only superficially hurt. Ending her mood swing would not be difficult.

Casually leaning his shoulder blades on the wall by the table, he watched with subtle enjoyment as she continued to ignore him, seemingly unhappy with the cooperation her hair was giving. Her towel slipped off her shoulder and lumped to the floor and she freed a hand from the task of fixing her hair, bending forward to retrieve her towel.

Auron elevated an eyebrow. The flannel tightened pleasantly around her ass and he stared shamelessly at her backside, even after the towel was picked up. It didn't matter what she wore, Auron realized.

"Hungry?" he asked.

Elbows up, still fiddling with her hair, Raine swung around, her gaze settling to the food on the table. Gasping with alacrity, she threw down her damp towel and scrambled into a seat. "Where did this come from?"

"Rin brought it."

She fumbled with her plate, robbed one of the utensil sets of a spoon and began scooping some of everything. "Are you having any?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Come sit by me at least," she said, luring him with a rueful smile. "Don't make me eat alone."

He smirked. Grudge forgotten.

Sliding the stool out from under the table, he positioned it under himself and sat. For lack of anything better to do, he poured himself a glass of sweet tea, the melting ice tinkling, the lemon slices drifting aimlessly around the pitcher. Raine sucked a bit of strawberry compote off her thumb and reached for her glass, presenting it to him. Without pause, Auron filled it, but when he set down the pitcher, adjusting more comfortably in his seat, Raine continued to hold her drink expectantly, a cool smile playing on her lips.

How could he forget? Picking up his glass, he pinked it against hers, saluted her with a reverent raise of his drink and sipped. She echoed him up until the point of consumption, when she guzzled half the tea in one gulp, tilting the glass back until the ice shifted.

"Portal travel makes me thirsty, I think," she said, slamming down the glass and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. She crossed her legs and spread a napkin on her lap. She pushed up her flannel sleeves and cut the roast with greedy enthusiasm, but as she chewed on her first bite, she dimmed.

"How is it?"

Nodding uncertainly, she said, "It's…good."

She ate slowly and swallowed with difficulty, hesitating before slicing another forkful.

Perhaps the Al Behd recipes weren't quite what she was used to. Then again, he wouldn't put it passed the Al Behd to do everything they could to stop a Summoner from doing a pilgrimage, even by making one temporarily sick.

"Wait," he said, although she wasn't in a rush for a second bite. He picked up a slab of meat with his fingers and took a cautious bite.

Raine stopped to watch him, seemingly mesmerized as he did something so ordinary. He rarely ate in front of her, if he ate at all.

Of course, it wouldn't make much business sense to poison his patrons and Rin had never given him cause for worry in his previous pilgrimages. With a shrug, Auron laid the meat on his empty plate. "It's fine."

"Your sense of taste must be as bad as your sight," Raine muttered, but flicked a careful eye up, gauging his reaction.

Auron grinned. "Here I thought I had good taste."

"Not judging by these pajamas," she said, mockingly haughty.

"I like them."

"Then maybe you should wear them."

Moving on from the pork, she picked up the corn on the cob and took a nibbling bite, chewing as she stirred the condiments around, checking labels.

"What do you need?" Auron asked.

"Butter. Salt. Pepper. It's just a little under-seasoned," she said, masking disappointment.

Auron pushed over a dish of butter and Raine used a knife to slather it on her corn, sprinkling on the flavorings, eating with her fingers.

Eventually they settled into a familiar, silent routine. Family-time at dinner. She ate. He watched. How many more of these moments did they have left? Auron refused to estimate a tally.

Raine succeeded to rickshaw through half of the corn before becoming distracted by the Summoning book on the table. "Mm!" she said, thinking of something as she licked the buttery oil from her fingers. Lifting her napkin from her lap, she ran it over her mouth. "I was looking at the book between fiends today," she said, sliding it over, opening to a page she had dog-eared.

Considering the strings he had to pull to get the book on loan, Auron tensed at her careless indifference towards the priceless religious text.

She tapped the tissue thin page, leaving a dark, greasy fingerprint next to a caption, under a hand-drawn picture. "What does this say?"

Raising his chin with alarmed sincerity, something warm bathed his insides, a memory long forgotten percolating into his mind's eye.

"Owen, what does this say?" Raine had asked him as a child, climbing into his reluctant lap with a children's book that was mostly pictures. There was mud on her overalls and her blouse had been buttoned crookedly, either from a negligent mother or Raine's first dressing attempt. She smelled like raspberry jelly that day, because there was still some on her chin, sprinkles of toast crumbs adhering to it.

Auron's thoughts were interjected by Raine's diffident foot, nudging his instep under the table.

"You okay?" Raine asked.

Focusing, Auron pulled the book over to better see the passage she was indicating. It had been a long time since he'd studied the teachings and they were written in an old language, but he didn't need to read the caption to know what the drawing was of.

"It's a fayth," he said, recognizing the hand-drawn sketch of Bahamut's Fayth, a hooded child, most of his face covered, save for a grim slice of his mouth and nose.

She glanced down at it dubiously. "Are you sure?"

"You doubt me?"

"It's just…I've seen him before."

Wrestling every muscle in his face, Auron suppressed anything that might give him away, clutching onto his impassivity. Tidus mentioned seeing one, too, right before Jecht's Sin arrived in Central Zanarkand all those years ago.

"When?" he asked, feigning nonchalance.

"This morning, in Zanarkand. On the train." she said, sliding her eyes away. "Before the wedding."

"Did he say anything?"

Playing with her food on her fork, she shook her head after a pause, but didn't meet his eye. "No. He just…sat there."

With a slow frown, Auron knew the fayth had said something to her. But it was only for them to know about. She was not going to divulge.

"Was my brother Yuna's first choice?"

Auron started. Is that what the fayth said to her? "For what?"

"Give me a break, Auron," she said, rolling her eyes. "My father and brother were both Sin, both Guardians. It doesn't take a genius to see the pattern."

"He was not her first choice," Auron said stiffly.

"Who was? You?"

He pressed his lips together firmly. "Mm."

"Why?"

"I volunteered. I was the oldest and had the least to lose."

Raine flashed him a sharp look, but it faded almost immediately. "So how does it happen? The Summoner chooses which Guardian will be Sin's rebirth?"

Auron glared. "Must you be this smart?"

"I take it that's a yes." Eyes falling to the napkin on her lap, she toyed with the corner seam. "Since you're my only Guardian, I will have to choose you."

He stared at her, severe, willing her to look up. She was too damned smart. Already cagy of Spira's beliefs, Raine was privy to its lies before she had a chance to learn them for herself. At this rate, she wouldn't need to finish the pilgrimage to see how it would end. This much insight into the pilgrimage could be disastrous and Auron worried about the trajectory of this conversation. He feared for the journey's outcome—or the odds of a journey at all. Then again, he left Tidus in the dark for most of the pilgrimage and in the end, nothing changed. The rotation continued just as it would if Auron had not been there at all.

There was also the matter of Raine's inability to pray. He had been considering asking one of the Summoners staying at the Travel Agency to call one of his Aeons for Raine to see. She was an atheist because of lack of proof, not because she was incapable of belief. He had also deliberated on a side quest to Guadosalam before heading to Besaid, to show her the Farplane, but the idea she would have to go in alone made him uneasy. Maybe he could trust one of the hypellos to accompany her inside, but she would immediately question his "choice" not to join her in the Farplane.

Auron realized why Raine's head was down. She was thoughtfully rubbing the scar on her wrist.

"Do you think there's a difference between sacrifice and suicide?" she asked in a whisper.

"Sacrifice is noble. Suicide is selfish."

She flashed him a wince and folded her arms around her stomach. "I never pictured Tidus as such a noble do-gooder." She sighed. "Look, I know I should do the right thing. I want to do the right thing, but I'm still trying to figure out what that is. I need to see more cards."

"I'm still deciding on my discard," Auron said carefully.

"You can't hold your cards so close forever."

"That's what happens when you've been dealt a bad hand," he muttered before he could stop himself. He shook his head and wanted to take it back. "Can we stop talking in metaphor? I'm not very good at it."

"I know you don't mean me." She smirked. "I'm your wild card."

"You're right about that," Auron laughed. Reflecting on her wit, Auron offered another short laugh and then subdued it. Raine was smiling down at her unfinished plate, but soon it went stale as more vexing thoughts came to her. He said, "You'll know the right thing to do. In time."

"You mean, when I'm too invested in the Pilgrimage to turn back."

"Try not to see it that way."

"How do I really know Tidus is Sin?"

"Your brother could sense Jecht in Sin."

Glancing up, she laughed dryly. "You'll have to do better than that. I haven't even seen Sin in his entirety, so how can I sense anything?"

She was right. Sin was keeping his distance. Showing restraint.

"And I don't believe Tidus would want me to be part of a cycle, either," Raine said.

"Jecht wanted Tidus to break the cycle."

"Well why didn't he?"

"It wasn't that simple. There were…obstacles."

She frowned thoughtfully at his vagueness, her clear blues searching for him through the screen of his sunglasses. "Obstacles I'm expected to overcome?"

"You did get all the brains."

She laughed abruptly, cynically, and pushed back her plate.

"Full?" Auron asked.

"I don't think it matters how much I eat," she muttered. "I'll still feel hollow inside."

Auron furrowed his brow. She must mean her grief for her upcoming sacrifice. Or did she now think it was suicide? He blamed himself for her failure to distinguish between the two, although the true responsibility lied with Tidus' Sin. When Auron came back to Spira several months ago, to secure provisions, to reserve this room, to order their supplies, he meant it to be a short visit, using his link with Sin to hitch a ride back to Zanarkand when he was finished. But Sin was displeased Auron had not brought Raine back with him and had spent the following three months showing Auron exactly how dissatisfied he was….

Zanarkand Marina

Sin ejected Auron on the same beach as Jecht's houseboat and Auron slid around in the sand on his knees, searching for his katana in the moonlight. The sleepy lap of the bay and faint buoy ring was a beautiful song he hadn't heard in what felt like ages. Sin had spent the last three months tossing Auron from one end of Spira to the other, from the sand dunes of Bikanel to the icy cliffs in Gagazet to the grassy sea in the Calm Lands. Each time, Auron would have to find Sin again, or let Sin find him, and hope the ride would take him back to Zanarkand. It had been a cruel game and Auron suspected Tidus was keeping him from Zanarkand on purpose, as punishment for leaving Raine.
/]
[/ Auron scrambled to his feet. Forget the katana. Find Raine.
/]
[/ Loping along the docks, he followed the familiar path amidst the fishing and sailing boats, to the only houseboat with a light still on and he took this as a hopeful sign she had not completely forgotten him. Climbing up on the hull, he leaned on the frame of the door, exhausted, and knocked, too loud, too anxious. While he waited, he rested his forehead on the door, praying this wasn't a trick, that he really was in Zanarkand, and that Raine was inside.
/]
[/ A moment later, he could hear someone on the other side, disengaging locks. It was late. "Who is it?"
/]
[/ A low whimper escaped his lips. It was her.
/]
[/ "It's me," he called and wondered if she still recognized his voice.
/]
[/ The door flew open. His Sweet Raine was wearing a small black tank top, fitted black briefs and nothing else.
/]
[/ "Auron," she gasped and her eyes immediately rolled back.
/]
[/ He caught her before she hit the floor in faint and shrugged out of his cloak to pick her up in both arms. With a bang, he kicked the door shut and brought her down the steps to the living area. He knew the way to her bedroom, but after a quick appraisal inside, Auron wondered if he was even in the right houseboat.
/]
[/ Spinning around in the middle of her parlor, Auron tossed Raine up to situate her in his arms, surveying the renovation. It was finished. The walls were up, painted, pictures hung. In the kitchen niche, the freshly-stained cupboard doors were installed, the new granite counters were in and her rickety bar stools with the daisies were replaced with brand-new chairs made from sturdy carpentry. The floors were all refinished and they shined with dark luxury. Jecht and Tidus' trophies had all been repaired and detailed and were displayed on built-in shelves. In the master bedroom, the floors carried through, the walls painted ivy green to coordinate the bedding and curtains. The bed looked new. So did the dresser and night table. A small lamp was on by the bed.
/]
[/ Propping her against the decorative pillows, of which there were at least a dozen, he arranged her more comfortably and sat on the side of the bed so his thirsty eye could drink her. It felt like he'd been gone a lifetime. There were times back in Spira he didn't think he would ever see her again and he feared his obsession with her had driven him to mild insanity.
/]
[/ Auron stroked her hair. She had it cut again. It was fine, but he liked it long. She had lost weight, too, needlessly in his opinion. She was borderline scrawny.
/]
[/ He could feel the familiar choke in the back of his throat and couldn't hold back. Scooting toward her, he brushed her blonde bangs away and kissed her forehead. Running his nose down the length of hers, he hovered over her lips, hesitating one second too long before Raine stirred. He recoiled back, giving her space.
/]
[/ Squinting at him, it seemed she had no recollection of him at all, but then her eyes popped open and she flew at him. "Auron!"
/]
[/ "Raine—" he said, muffled by the material of her tank top. Her slender arms crushed his neck as she kneeled up in front of him and his glasses went askew.
/]
[/ "I thought you were dead!"
/]
[/ He found himself smiling against her breasts. He managed to resist the urge to nuzzle her, but he did take a long, delirious inhale. She smelled of fabric softener and toothpaste. He felt her covering the top of his head with loud, exaggerated kisses and his hands came up to the small of her back, where he could feel her warm, bare skin in the empty space between her cotton underwear and border of her shirt. A great soothing came over him, the constant tempering of his soul with a blacksmith's hammer, when he realized he was finally home.
/]
[/ They had never embraced like this and she felt delightfully good against him. She was an adult now, and he realized he needed time away from her to see her with a new perspective. Young, yes, but she was now older than he was when he started his first pilgrimage. Spira had loosened something in him, beat it to a fine powder, rendering it useless, and he came back to Zanarkand broken and incomplete. Only Raine could rebuild him.
/]
[/ "Auron—"
/]
[/ "Raine, I've missed you." As he spoke, his lip brushed against the swell of her nipple and his fingers were tracing her spine down towards her tailbone. When he found her bottom, he discovered how perfectly his hands cupped around each smooth cheek….
/]
[/"Auron," she said lucidly, shoving him by the shoulders, and his hands came down on the bed behind him to catch himself. His welcome was over.
/]
[/ Drawing her underwear back in place, Raine sat cross-legged against the headboard and Auron glimpsed a strange, braided bracelet on her wrist before her hand disappeared behind her.
/]
[/ "What's that?"
/]
[/ "You said a few days." The edge in her voice was sharp enough to slice him in half.
/]
[/ "It was never my intention to leave you for so long." He took her elbow gently, coaxing her hand into the open. "Show me your hand."
/]
[/ Her other hand came out to stop him. "You said 10 years. It's been 11. I thought you were gone forever and you just sucked at goodbyes."
/]
[/ He did…suck at goodbyes, and he detested how this was beginning to feel like one.
/]
[/ Palm rotating, Raine showed him the ring on her finger to distract him from the hand behind her back. The diversion worked. Auron was transfixed by the diamond, his extremities numb.
/]
[/ "You are spoken for," he observed.
/]
[/ "I can speak for myself," she said, low, even. "Did you expect me to wait for you forever?"
/]
[/ "Three months is hardly forever," Auron said stupidly.
/]
[/ She gave him a hard, unblinking look. Auron realized the wait she was talking about was actually much longer.
/]
[/ "Jory?" Auron asked. The name was acid on his lips.
/]
[/ "Of course."
/]
[/ "He's not loyal."
/]
[/ "We've worked it out," she said dryly.
/]
[/ Bitter, Auron asked, "Was the houseboat part of the negotiation?"
/]
[/ Raine darkened. "What is that supposed to mean?"
/]
[/ "Did Jory pay for the renovations?"
/]
[/ Her eyes narrowed heatedly. "What business is it of yours?"
/]
[/ "You're renovating to sell, are you not?"
/]
[/ "Why? Do you think you're entitled to something because you helped me tear down some walls and fix a few appliances?"
/]
[/ Auron arched an eyebrow, tensed his jaw, spoke through his teeth. "Not everyone is motivated by profit."
/]
[/ He saw it coming, braced for it even, but when she slapped him, it smarted. His face pitched sideways, his glasses crooked again.
/]
[/ She made a brief fist and shook her hand, which obviously stung from her assault, but Auron saw his chance and seized her arm.
/]
[/ "Don't," she said, fighting him.
/]
[/ Wrenching her hand, he forced her wrist up, but he couldn't tell at first what he was looking at.
/]
[/Oh my Raine, what did you do to yourself?
/]
[/ "You're hurting me," she said, without conviction.
/]
[/ He loosened his grip a miniscule, tracing a bracelet of corrupted, twisted flesh on the inside of her wrist with his thumb. Unlike the scar on his eye, it appeared self-inflicted. "What is this?"
/]
[/ "My rage phase," she whispered, gazing sidelong.
/]
[/ Auron glowered. "I don't understand."
/]
[/ "The fourth phase of abandonment?" Her eyes flicked to his.
/]
[/ "Abandonment?" He shook his head. "I never-"
/]
[/ "My therapist says I have abandonment issues."
/]
[/ "When did you get a therapist?"
/]
[/ "I was assigned one before I could leave the hospital." She twisted her hand out of his clutch and folded her arms to simultaneously hide her scar and her ring. "I'm glad it happened."
/]
[/ "Glad?" Auron spat.
/]
[/ Her posture straightened, offended. "Yes, glad. I was able to get the help I needed. She helped me realize I've always been attracted to people who will eventually leave me and why I never made any real friendships in school. She says it stems from when Jecht left. I was too young to process it and it seemed to build after Tidus and my mother."
/]
[/ Auron scowled. "Your father and brother loved you. So did your mother."
/]
[/ "And do you?"
/]
[/ Chest tightening, he hesitated. "I love you and Tidus both."
/]
[/ "I see." Her lips pursed. "Then I guess my therapist was right about my father issues, too. My attachment to you is not only unhealthy…it's apparently 'textbook,' as she put it. According to her, I've been using you as a replacement for the attention I never got from Jecht."
/]
[/ Auron listened with a vague look of disgust, as if there was a bad smell in the room. Who was this therapist and why did she think she knew so much about him? What was worse, Raine believed her. Of course, why shouldn't she? Auron had never given Raine reason to believe otherwise and he feared now it was too late. She had already made her choice. "Where was Jory when it happened?" he asked.
/]
[/ "What does that matter?"
/]
[/ "He should have been here to take care of you."
/]
[/ "When have I ever needed anyone to take care of me?" Her eyes burned into his, as easily as if the sunglasses weren't there, and a cruel smile twitched on her lips. "You think you've been taking care of me these last ten years? I only let you hang around so you could feel like you were fulfilling your obligation to my brother."
/]
[/ Auron arrogantly slanted his head. "And how long was I gone before you hurt yourself?"
/]
[/ "Everybody makes mistakes," she said with a stiff shrug. "Even you."

Owen, how did you get yow owie?

"Raine—" Crestfallen, Auron wasn't sure what to say, but he had become aware of queasy ache inside him. Raine was broken, too, he realized. But she fixed herself and had already taken strides to build herself back up, without Auron.
/]
[/ Raine sighed and it sounded agonizingly final. "Look, I know you have this promise to my brother you need to uphold, but I'd appreciate it if you just carry it out without bothering me. I've made so much progress and you coming back…well, it's liable to set me back." Her voice trembled then and her thumb swiped casually at her eye, but she didn't break.
/]
[/ So that was it. He swallowed, clenched his teeth together, and then nodded once.
/]
[/ A farewell.