Categories > TV > WWE
Every Word You Said
0 reviewsAlex is faced with a situation that he has no control over. Chris Sabin/Alex Shelley, slight slash.
0Unrated
Alex could hardly believe what he’d just heard. Chris was in love with him? He couldn’t fathom why Chris hadn’t told him until now, but when he thought about it, Alex realized that Chris had been dropping hints left and right, and not subtle ones, either. But he’d been so caught up in his own little world that he hadn’t paid attention, something that Alex was mentally kicking himself for now. He wished that Chris would’ve been more direct with him, rather than relying on nonverbal cues to get his point across. Alex was a very blunt, straight-forward individual, and he expected the same from his friends. But Chris had never been very good at expressing how he felt in words. It just wasn’t the way he operated, and Chris probably never would operate like that.
The news was difficult to process. It wasn’t that Alex was put off by Chris’ confusion; he wasn’t so shallow as to let it affect their friendship. He had a deep respect for and admiration of Chris, and they were like brothers, but did he feel the same way? Alex did love Chris, but it wasn’t romantic love. Alex had no problem with gay people—a few of his friends outside of the business were gay, and he knew quite a few wrestlers that were—but he wasn’t. He was quite surprised to learn that Chris was, as they had spent a decade working and traveling together, without any discernible evidence to back this up. Alex was baffled that he hadn’t realized this sooner, but Chris always kept his feelings hidden from almost everyone, even Alex.
Alex had no idea how he was supposed to respond to Chris. He didn’t want to hurt Chris’ feelings and possibly damage their friendship, but he couldn’t lie and act like he felt the same way as Chris. He couldn’t imagine the anguish and inner turmoil that plagued Chris, and Alex felt somewhat responsible for that. But, in his defense, Chris had never been short of female admirers and flings. How was Alex to know that Chris had simply been using the women to try and rid himself of his feelings for his tag team partner? Even if he had known, what could he have done about it? Alex hadn’t yet responded to Chris’ confession, and he knew that if he didn’t at least try to say something soon, it would be glaringly obvious that he was bothered by what Chris had said.
The younger Machine Gun was completely out of his element, and he didn’t like it. This was a situation that had to be handled delicately, and delicate wasn’t Alex’s style. He wondered if he couldn’t reject Chris in a manner that would make it seem as though he felt that he was unworthy of Chris’ advances, and then quickly dismissed the idea. Chris was naïve at times, but he wasn’t completely stupid. He would know if Alex was trying to let him down easily. Doing that would only make the situation more complicated, and would probably humiliate Chris. Alex couldn’t do that to him.
Alex wondered how long Chris had been harboring these feelings for him. Unrequited love sucks, he thought. Did it really matter how long Chris had been hiding his true feelings for Alex? Would it really have mattered if Chris had told him before now? Alex knew that it wouldn’t have made a difference, and now, he was struggling with the best way to handle this issue. He was in way over his head. Regardless, he refused to let it affect their friendship. Alex wasn’t always the most mature person in the world, and he knew that he rubbed a lot of people the wrong way with his views on life and just his attitude in general, but when it came to his friends and family, his love and support was unwavering. Alex had never stabbed anyone in the back, though it had certainly happened to him, and he refused to abandon Chris now.
This was definitely a lot for him to deal with, and Alex knew that it wouldn’t be easy, but he was willing to do whatever it took to help ease Chris’ tension. He only wished that things could be different and Chris wouldn’t have to suffer the pain and humiliation of rejection. In some alternate universe, perhaps.
“So, yeah,” Chris said, his eyes focused on the ground. “I thought you should know.” He looked up at Alex, his gaze apprehensive. Alex noticed that Chris didn’t look at him directly, but he understood why. If the situation was reversed and it was him in Chris’ shoes, Alex wouldn’t be able to look at him either.
“I’m sorry, ‘Lex,” Chris offered, an empty apology that Alex knew was solely for his benefit. He didn’t want Chris to be sorry, however. Even though there was no way the feelings could be reciprocal, Alex still didn’t want Chris to ever apologize for how he felt.
“Don’t be.” He tried to smile, if only to help Chris feel at ease. “Look, you can’t help how you feel. I’m sorry that we can’t—“
Chris held up a hand to cut him off.
“It’s okay. Don’t feel sorry for me, okay? I don’t want you to treat me differently, either.” He dropped his hand. “I don’t want this to change anything between us. But I had to tell you. I couldn’t walk around carrying this on my shoulders anymore.”
Alex understood. Maybe not completely, as he had never been in this kind of situation before, but he knew all too well what concealing feelings and trying to bury them deep down in the darkest recesses of his psyche was like. He despised it, and he admired Chris for handling it much better than he ever could have. There was no reason why this had to be a big deal—as far as Alex was concerned, now that Chris’ feelings were out in the open and had been acknowledged, it was time to move on. He didn’t want to linger on the situation and make Chris feel any more uncomfortable than he already felt.
“I was gonna go to the gym,” Chris put in, interrupting Alex’s thoughts. “Wanna come with?”
And just like that, the topic was dropped. Chris didn’t mention it for the rest of the day, and Alex tucked it away in the back of his mind. For the two of them, it was almost as if the whole thing had been nothing more than a dream. Alex saw no reason why it ever needed to be touched upon again, and Chris seemed to feel the same way. They were able to conduct themselves with decorum and professionalism, and their friendship remained strong as a result. Alex hoped that wouldn’t change.
The news was difficult to process. It wasn’t that Alex was put off by Chris’ confusion; he wasn’t so shallow as to let it affect their friendship. He had a deep respect for and admiration of Chris, and they were like brothers, but did he feel the same way? Alex did love Chris, but it wasn’t romantic love. Alex had no problem with gay people—a few of his friends outside of the business were gay, and he knew quite a few wrestlers that were—but he wasn’t. He was quite surprised to learn that Chris was, as they had spent a decade working and traveling together, without any discernible evidence to back this up. Alex was baffled that he hadn’t realized this sooner, but Chris always kept his feelings hidden from almost everyone, even Alex.
Alex had no idea how he was supposed to respond to Chris. He didn’t want to hurt Chris’ feelings and possibly damage their friendship, but he couldn’t lie and act like he felt the same way as Chris. He couldn’t imagine the anguish and inner turmoil that plagued Chris, and Alex felt somewhat responsible for that. But, in his defense, Chris had never been short of female admirers and flings. How was Alex to know that Chris had simply been using the women to try and rid himself of his feelings for his tag team partner? Even if he had known, what could he have done about it? Alex hadn’t yet responded to Chris’ confession, and he knew that if he didn’t at least try to say something soon, it would be glaringly obvious that he was bothered by what Chris had said.
The younger Machine Gun was completely out of his element, and he didn’t like it. This was a situation that had to be handled delicately, and delicate wasn’t Alex’s style. He wondered if he couldn’t reject Chris in a manner that would make it seem as though he felt that he was unworthy of Chris’ advances, and then quickly dismissed the idea. Chris was naïve at times, but he wasn’t completely stupid. He would know if Alex was trying to let him down easily. Doing that would only make the situation more complicated, and would probably humiliate Chris. Alex couldn’t do that to him.
Alex wondered how long Chris had been harboring these feelings for him. Unrequited love sucks, he thought. Did it really matter how long Chris had been hiding his true feelings for Alex? Would it really have mattered if Chris had told him before now? Alex knew that it wouldn’t have made a difference, and now, he was struggling with the best way to handle this issue. He was in way over his head. Regardless, he refused to let it affect their friendship. Alex wasn’t always the most mature person in the world, and he knew that he rubbed a lot of people the wrong way with his views on life and just his attitude in general, but when it came to his friends and family, his love and support was unwavering. Alex had never stabbed anyone in the back, though it had certainly happened to him, and he refused to abandon Chris now.
This was definitely a lot for him to deal with, and Alex knew that it wouldn’t be easy, but he was willing to do whatever it took to help ease Chris’ tension. He only wished that things could be different and Chris wouldn’t have to suffer the pain and humiliation of rejection. In some alternate universe, perhaps.
“So, yeah,” Chris said, his eyes focused on the ground. “I thought you should know.” He looked up at Alex, his gaze apprehensive. Alex noticed that Chris didn’t look at him directly, but he understood why. If the situation was reversed and it was him in Chris’ shoes, Alex wouldn’t be able to look at him either.
“I’m sorry, ‘Lex,” Chris offered, an empty apology that Alex knew was solely for his benefit. He didn’t want Chris to be sorry, however. Even though there was no way the feelings could be reciprocal, Alex still didn’t want Chris to ever apologize for how he felt.
“Don’t be.” He tried to smile, if only to help Chris feel at ease. “Look, you can’t help how you feel. I’m sorry that we can’t—“
Chris held up a hand to cut him off.
“It’s okay. Don’t feel sorry for me, okay? I don’t want you to treat me differently, either.” He dropped his hand. “I don’t want this to change anything between us. But I had to tell you. I couldn’t walk around carrying this on my shoulders anymore.”
Alex understood. Maybe not completely, as he had never been in this kind of situation before, but he knew all too well what concealing feelings and trying to bury them deep down in the darkest recesses of his psyche was like. He despised it, and he admired Chris for handling it much better than he ever could have. There was no reason why this had to be a big deal—as far as Alex was concerned, now that Chris’ feelings were out in the open and had been acknowledged, it was time to move on. He didn’t want to linger on the situation and make Chris feel any more uncomfortable than he already felt.
“I was gonna go to the gym,” Chris put in, interrupting Alex’s thoughts. “Wanna come with?”
And just like that, the topic was dropped. Chris didn’t mention it for the rest of the day, and Alex tucked it away in the back of his mind. For the two of them, it was almost as if the whole thing had been nothing more than a dream. Alex saw no reason why it ever needed to be touched upon again, and Chris seemed to feel the same way. They were able to conduct themselves with decorum and professionalism, and their friendship remained strong as a result. Alex hoped that wouldn’t change.
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