Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance
A/N: Wrote it for a friend using a random generator thing for stories. Enjoy! xo
Gerard was hella pissed. His fucking brother had convinced him it would be a 'good idea' to go for a stupid mother fucking shitty shit shit fucking wank of a guided hike , get fresh air and have 'fun'. Yeah, about as fun as fucking mass murder, then again for Gerard at that moment in time mass murder sounded real fucking good. It was muddy, wet and cold, he was surrounded by tree humpers and Gerard was carrying what felt like the worlds heaviest fucking bag and he felt like his spine was going to break in half (which Gerard would be delighted with if it saved him from this stupid hike).
It took nothing more than a moments stop to let Gerard tie his damn shoe laces and then the group was gone. Just fucking gone. Like they'd evaporated or something. He knew them hikers walked fucking fast and Gerard hadn't matched their pace at any point but he didn't realise they were that quick.
He scanned around desperately for any sign of what turn they took or any sight of them at all, really. There was only one fellow hiker who was further behind than Gerard was and Gerard was pretty fucking sure the younger looking guy had been the whole time since he'd busy dawdling and looking about like he'd never seen a motherfucking tree before. Brilliant. Gerard was stuck with another nature gay.
Gerard pulled out his phone, hoping for some signal so he could simply call Mikey, make them all wait for him and the Dawdler who was obviously on something, pot probably. Though typically, there was no signal when you were in the middle of fucking nowhere. "Mother fucker!" Gerard yelled angrily, throwing his phone on the floor to emphasize how pissed off he was that this place was shit. And he was lost. And stuck with Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler. Brilliant. Top class. Gerard hadn't even noticed the brunette's presence until the tattooed man in his early twenties spoke up.
"Now, that wasn't very clever." He pointed out, biting back a smirk and by the looks of it a laugh. This pissed off Gerard even more. Who the fuck did he think he was?! That was until Gerard realized the little shit bag was right. Slamming your iPhone on the floor when you were in the middle of nowhere wasn't at all clever.
Gerard looked down at his smashed up phone, frowning. He was kinda shocked at how much of an idiot he'd just been. His phone wasn't just broken, it was in pieces over the concrete. This pissed off Gerard even more, partly because fuck, he'd just ruined his phone, and partly because the little pothead was fucking right. Fuck. Once again blinded with rage, Gerard screamed 'Mother fucker fuck balls, fucking wanker!' and stamped on the remains of his phone.
He wanted to punch Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler in the face. He wanted to drop kick old ladies and crawl in a hole and wait to be engulfed by a bear. Once he'd managed to somewhat calm his shit, he realized he hadn't just broken his phone, he had completely obliterated it and now there was truly no hope in it working.
"Yeah, I don't think that helped." Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler chipped in again, looking like he was definitely gonna laugh. Gerard glared irritably. "I swear, if you don't stop being... Being unhelpful... I'll... I'll punch a baby in the face!" He declared, scowling. Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler lost his shit at that point which, you guessed it, fucked off Gerard more. Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler was doubled over, having a fit of laughter, tears dribbling down his cheeks. "Y-you're gonna... No... I c-can't... I... Ah, fuck... I don't t-think punching a... A baby is l-legal." He managed between breaths. Gerard groaned and flipped him off when he wasn't looking, picking up the remains of his phone and shaking his head.
Once Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler managed to calm his tits, he held out his hand for Gerard's free one. "I'm Frank." He smirked at the male. Gerard eyed his hand then took it, giving it a shake. "I'm Gerard." He replied. Frank snorted and covered his mouth to stop himself laughing. "Is this the hand you punch babies with?" He teased. "Fuck off."
Gerard sat himself on a tree stump, figuring the hikers would come back, right? So he sat there, trying to put his phone back together though he knew there was no hope in fucking hell. "Oh for mother of fuckery fuck shit!" Gerard groaned. Frank smirked over at him from the pile of amber leaves he was laying on. "You realise it isn't gonna wo-" Gerard cut his finger on the glass and hissed. "That was your fuckin' fault!" He huffed. On the bright side, he had a first aid kit, water, food, extra clothes and whatnot in his backpack.
"Why are you so pissy, stranger?" Frank asked, gazing over at him. Gerard scrunched up his nose. He was pissy for many reasons, Frank actually being one of them. "How long have you got?" Gerard retorted. Frank grinned and checked the time. "I've got all day." He assured. Gerard rolled his eyes. "It's cold as shit. It's about to fucking rain any second now." He gestured to the dark clouds looming above. "I hate trees as of now. I have lost my brother for God knows how long, we are in the fucking middle of fucking nowhere, my phone is fucking broken. And the company?" He gestured to Frank. "Is ridiculous!" He snapped, shaking his head. Frank smirked, giggling at his never ending rage. "My company is worse." He retorted.
Gerard rolled his eyes and opened his backpack, shaking his head. "I'm hungry." He muttered, pulling out wellies, a couple of blankets, a plaster, extra shoes, a couple of jumpers and a mallet, plus half filled bottle of water.
"Are you fucking shitting me? Where's the food?! The water?! I... Why the fuck do I have a mallet and not a bag of fucking crisps or smokes?" He whined. That mallet would have come in handy earlier... Maybe even now...
Gerard pushed the murderous thoughts out of his head. Frank, as per fucking usual, looked amused by it all. He wasn't hungry, so it didn't matter to him. Gerard wanted to rip his hair out and smash himself in the face with the mallet. And typically at that point it started to rain.
Another long two hours had passed and Frank and Gerard found themselves huddled under a a tiny umbrella Frank had brought, sharing a bottle of water and freezing their asses off though they were wrapped tightly together with all the blankets Gerard had. "This is the worst day ever."
"It's different." Frank agreed. "No, it's a pile of wank." Gerard argued.
"What kinda bitchy pills do you take? Like, seriously?" Frank replied, and Gerard just scowled at the pieces of his phone being drenched by the rain. "I hate nature." Gerard added after a couple of minutes. "I'm never hiking again, I'm so fucking pissed." He huffed. Frank giggled and nodded. "No shit." He beamed, eyeing the darker haired male.
Silence fell again but that silly amused smile was still playing on Frank's lips and Gerard was still moody. It felt like the silence had lasted forever when they heard voices, Gerard's face lighting up. "Did you hear that?! That's the others, fuck! Fuck yeah!" He got up excitedly, as the other hikers came into sight.
Frank got up soon after, noticing how the rain has calmed and now it was nothing more than a light drizzle if anything. Mikey looked relieved as he saw Gerard, moving over. "Where the fuck did you go?" The younger Way quizzed. Gerard was stuffing his warm clothes and stuff into the back eagerly. "Nowhere. You all fucking left without me!" He frowned, putting the rucksack on his back and going over to Mikey.
"Let's go. I want to go home right fucking now." Gerard demanded. Mikey nodded and frowned. "Okay." He agreed. Frank watched Gerard, packing away himself. That amused smile never left his lips and he was sure he'd remember this particular hike.
Gerard decided to smile back, a genuine smile towards the guy. He deserved it after dealing with pissed off Gerard for four long hours.
"I broke my phone." He turned to his brother, looking pissed of again.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. I'm pissed with you."
"How pissed?"
"Hella."
Gerard was hella pissed. His fucking brother had convinced him it would be a 'good idea' to go for a stupid mother fucking shitty shit shit fucking wank of a guided hike , get fresh air and have 'fun'. Yeah, about as fun as fucking mass murder, then again for Gerard at that moment in time mass murder sounded real fucking good. It was muddy, wet and cold, he was surrounded by tree humpers and Gerard was carrying what felt like the worlds heaviest fucking bag and he felt like his spine was going to break in half (which Gerard would be delighted with if it saved him from this stupid hike).
It took nothing more than a moments stop to let Gerard tie his damn shoe laces and then the group was gone. Just fucking gone. Like they'd evaporated or something. He knew them hikers walked fucking fast and Gerard hadn't matched their pace at any point but he didn't realise they were that quick.
He scanned around desperately for any sign of what turn they took or any sight of them at all, really. There was only one fellow hiker who was further behind than Gerard was and Gerard was pretty fucking sure the younger looking guy had been the whole time since he'd busy dawdling and looking about like he'd never seen a motherfucking tree before. Brilliant. Gerard was stuck with another nature gay.
Gerard pulled out his phone, hoping for some signal so he could simply call Mikey, make them all wait for him and the Dawdler who was obviously on something, pot probably. Though typically, there was no signal when you were in the middle of fucking nowhere. "Mother fucker!" Gerard yelled angrily, throwing his phone on the floor to emphasize how pissed off he was that this place was shit. And he was lost. And stuck with Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler. Brilliant. Top class. Gerard hadn't even noticed the brunette's presence until the tattooed man in his early twenties spoke up.
"Now, that wasn't very clever." He pointed out, biting back a smirk and by the looks of it a laugh. This pissed off Gerard even more. Who the fuck did he think he was?! That was until Gerard realized the little shit bag was right. Slamming your iPhone on the floor when you were in the middle of nowhere wasn't at all clever.
Gerard looked down at his smashed up phone, frowning. He was kinda shocked at how much of an idiot he'd just been. His phone wasn't just broken, it was in pieces over the concrete. This pissed off Gerard even more, partly because fuck, he'd just ruined his phone, and partly because the little pothead was fucking right. Fuck. Once again blinded with rage, Gerard screamed 'Mother fucker fuck balls, fucking wanker!' and stamped on the remains of his phone.
He wanted to punch Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler in the face. He wanted to drop kick old ladies and crawl in a hole and wait to be engulfed by a bear. Once he'd managed to somewhat calm his shit, he realized he hadn't just broken his phone, he had completely obliterated it and now there was truly no hope in it working.
"Yeah, I don't think that helped." Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler chipped in again, looking like he was definitely gonna laugh. Gerard glared irritably. "I swear, if you don't stop being... Being unhelpful... I'll... I'll punch a baby in the face!" He declared, scowling. Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler lost his shit at that point which, you guessed it, fucked off Gerard more. Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler was doubled over, having a fit of laughter, tears dribbling down his cheeks. "Y-you're gonna... No... I c-can't... I... Ah, fuck... I don't t-think punching a... A baby is l-legal." He managed between breaths. Gerard groaned and flipped him off when he wasn't looking, picking up the remains of his phone and shaking his head.
Once Mr Obvious-Stoner-Dawdler managed to calm his tits, he held out his hand for Gerard's free one. "I'm Frank." He smirked at the male. Gerard eyed his hand then took it, giving it a shake. "I'm Gerard." He replied. Frank snorted and covered his mouth to stop himself laughing. "Is this the hand you punch babies with?" He teased. "Fuck off."
Gerard sat himself on a tree stump, figuring the hikers would come back, right? So he sat there, trying to put his phone back together though he knew there was no hope in fucking hell. "Oh for mother of fuckery fuck shit!" Gerard groaned. Frank smirked over at him from the pile of amber leaves he was laying on. "You realise it isn't gonna wo-" Gerard cut his finger on the glass and hissed. "That was your fuckin' fault!" He huffed. On the bright side, he had a first aid kit, water, food, extra clothes and whatnot in his backpack.
"Why are you so pissy, stranger?" Frank asked, gazing over at him. Gerard scrunched up his nose. He was pissy for many reasons, Frank actually being one of them. "How long have you got?" Gerard retorted. Frank grinned and checked the time. "I've got all day." He assured. Gerard rolled his eyes. "It's cold as shit. It's about to fucking rain any second now." He gestured to the dark clouds looming above. "I hate trees as of now. I have lost my brother for God knows how long, we are in the fucking middle of fucking nowhere, my phone is fucking broken. And the company?" He gestured to Frank. "Is ridiculous!" He snapped, shaking his head. Frank smirked, giggling at his never ending rage. "My company is worse." He retorted.
Gerard rolled his eyes and opened his backpack, shaking his head. "I'm hungry." He muttered, pulling out wellies, a couple of blankets, a plaster, extra shoes, a couple of jumpers and a mallet, plus half filled bottle of water.
"Are you fucking shitting me? Where's the food?! The water?! I... Why the fuck do I have a mallet and not a bag of fucking crisps or smokes?" He whined. That mallet would have come in handy earlier... Maybe even now...
Gerard pushed the murderous thoughts out of his head. Frank, as per fucking usual, looked amused by it all. He wasn't hungry, so it didn't matter to him. Gerard wanted to rip his hair out and smash himself in the face with the mallet. And typically at that point it started to rain.
Another long two hours had passed and Frank and Gerard found themselves huddled under a a tiny umbrella Frank had brought, sharing a bottle of water and freezing their asses off though they were wrapped tightly together with all the blankets Gerard had. "This is the worst day ever."
"It's different." Frank agreed. "No, it's a pile of wank." Gerard argued.
"What kinda bitchy pills do you take? Like, seriously?" Frank replied, and Gerard just scowled at the pieces of his phone being drenched by the rain. "I hate nature." Gerard added after a couple of minutes. "I'm never hiking again, I'm so fucking pissed." He huffed. Frank giggled and nodded. "No shit." He beamed, eyeing the darker haired male.
Silence fell again but that silly amused smile was still playing on Frank's lips and Gerard was still moody. It felt like the silence had lasted forever when they heard voices, Gerard's face lighting up. "Did you hear that?! That's the others, fuck! Fuck yeah!" He got up excitedly, as the other hikers came into sight.
Frank got up soon after, noticing how the rain has calmed and now it was nothing more than a light drizzle if anything. Mikey looked relieved as he saw Gerard, moving over. "Where the fuck did you go?" The younger Way quizzed. Gerard was stuffing his warm clothes and stuff into the back eagerly. "Nowhere. You all fucking left without me!" He frowned, putting the rucksack on his back and going over to Mikey.
"Let's go. I want to go home right fucking now." Gerard demanded. Mikey nodded and frowned. "Okay." He agreed. Frank watched Gerard, packing away himself. That amused smile never left his lips and he was sure he'd remember this particular hike.
Gerard decided to smile back, a genuine smile towards the guy. He deserved it after dealing with pissed off Gerard for four long hours.
"I broke my phone." He turned to his brother, looking pissed of again.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. I'm pissed with you."
"How pissed?"
"Hella."
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