FicWad

“What’s up, Ray?” I grinned, walking into the Starbucks around about eleven.

“Coffee, coffee and…

“Coffee?”

“You guessed it,” he grinned. “What’s up with you? You seem happy.”

I chuckled, “Can’t I just be happy?”

“Yeah, but normally there’s a reason,” he noted. “Anyway, where were you this morning? I had your usual coffee waiting, but you never came flying in here like you usually do. And why aren’t you at work?”

I took a seat in front of him and accepted the beverage he already knew I would order.

“I took the day off work,” I informed him. “Mikey is moving in later today and I wanted to be there when he arrived. Besides, my leave is way over due. I think I deserve at least one day to myself.”

He nodded, “Good old Mikey. I remember you mentioning something about him coming to the city. How is he?”

“He’s great. He’s real grown up now,” I chuckled lightly. “He got a job at some bookstore.”

Ray grinned broadly. “It will be good to see him again. He’s probably going to come in here as much as you do,” he joked.

“Caffeine runs in our blood. What else can I say?”

Our conversation was interrupted by someone storming past me and around to the back of the
counter. “Shit, I’m so sorry I’m late!”

Ray rolled his eyes, leaning on the counter with one elbow and looking at her in disapproval. “It’s nothing new. You just really stretched it out today.”

I took a sip of my coffee, thinking for a moment that she was going to ignore him as she took off her hoodie.

“I said I’m sorry okay?” she eventually responded while shoving the piece of clothing under the counter and whipping around to face him.

“You’re sorry every day and yet you keep being late,” Ray continued to lecture her.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t help it. It’s not like I plan on being late every morning!”

“Ever heard of an alarm clock?” he asked as a matter of fact.

I looked at the girl who seemed like she was going to explode. I was surprised by the scene before me. I didn’t exactly expect this from either the people in front of me. Yes, Ray was strict especially when it came to being responsible, but he wasn’t even being nice about it. Okay, maybe I did expect this from her. It would seem that she had somewhat of a short temper.

“I’m sorry, Mr. ‘Stick-up-my-butt’. It won’t happen again,” she replied cheekily.

“Grow up…” Ray started to say.

“Kat?”

She immediately stopped listening to Ray and turned her head in my direction, probably glad for the distraction. She blinked a couple of times.

“What are you doing here?” she wanted to know.

“I’m talking to you,” Ray exclaimed sternly realizing that she wasn’t paying attention to him anymore.

“Fuck it, Toro!” she snapped. “I’m helping a damn customer.” It was obviously a blatant lie, firstly, since I already had coffee, and secondly because she really wasn’t helping me and Ray knew that.

“I come here every day,” I told her ignoring their arguing.

I heard Ray grumble something before he finally noticed that Kat and I were talking.

“You two know each other?” he asked confused.

“We do,” I affirmed, smiling. “We’ve hung out once or twice.”

“I work here every day and I’ve never seen you here before,” Kat continued still ignoring him.

“Because you’re always late,” Ray commented.

“How long have you been working here?” I questioned wondering why we’ve never seen each other.

“Longer than a year now,” she replied.

“Well, I’ve been coming here every day for even longer than that.”


“I can confirm that,” Ray spoke up seeming to have forgotten that he was still fighting with Kat.

“Small world,” she muttered absentmindedly.

It dawned on me that maybe I have seen her, I just never actually noticed her before. I looked, but didn’t see. It was a slightly unsettling thought, but made me realize that I was only human. I was so self-absorbed that I didn’t take note of the people around me.

“How do you two know each other?”

I deliberately chose not to dwell on my own thoughts, instead opting to solely focus on the conversation going on. There was no need to ruin my good morning with negative realizations.

“We’ve been friends for a couple of years now,” Ray answered and I nodded.

Kat looked stunned by this revelation. “I never would have guessed it. If you guys will excuse me for a little while, I need to go to the back and have a smoke to calm my senses, because I have a huge hangover and you upset me,” she said, looking at Ray while she spoke the last part and then heading for the backdoor.

“Hold up!” I called to her, emptying the last gulp of my coffee and jogging after her with Ray staring after me.

“Don’t you have work?” Kat wanted to know as we stepped outside to the sounds of traffic and stale back alley air.

“I got the day off. My brother is moving in with me today.”

“Oh,” she looked surprised by this revelation. The female with hair as black as the night lit up a cigarette and blew smoke out into the already polluted air of New York City. “Man, I really do not know you. I didn’t even know you had a brother.”

“We don’t spend enough time together.”

“You’re the one who’s been a stranger.”

“Aw, have you missed me?” I teased with a smile making her laugh. “No, I just haven’t seen you in a while. That’s all.”

I looked down the alley at a honking car before responding. “I’ve had a bit of an off time. There was this girl I liked, but things didn’t exactly work out the way I planned.” My eyes met the gravel under my feet as I frowned at the thought of Sarah. With Mikey coming to live with me, I haven’t thought of her the last day or two.

“What happened?” Kat asked genuinely sympathetic.

I breathed in deeply. “Well, I’m an addict and she isn’t. There’s your first clue. I wasn’t ready to change.” I said this last part remembering our argument. Sarah wanted to help me clean up, but I didn’t want to. “Anyway, she left to continue her studies and that was it.”

“That sucks. I’m sorry.”

I looked up again. “That’s okay,” I waved it off. “It gave me an excuse to go home and spend some time with my family again.”

“Did you have a good time at home?”

“Oh yeah,” I smiled. “It was really good to be somewhere I felt safe and even appreciated. It’s a rare feeling, not being alone.” There was a nostalgic little smile on her face making me feel both happy and sad for her at the same time. Happy that she had good memories to be nostalgic about, but sad that they didn’t seem to be apply to her present life anymore. “And I saw my grandmother, Elena. I miss her all the time. I swear that woman made me who I am,” I stopped, thinking. “Aside from all the bad shit I mean.”

Kat nodded, understanding what I meant. “Why don’t you move back there? You can be surrounded by your loved ones all the time. Things can actually get better.”

I shook my head. “No, I can’t. My life is here. Besides, Mikey’s moving in so things are already looking up.”

“Your parents don’t know, do they?”

I swallowed hard. “I don’t want to disappoint them or break their hearts.”

“I get it. Believe me, I honestly do.” It was like there was more that she wanted to say, but she didn’t.

She dropped the cigarette bud and stepped on it. “Unfortunately I have to get to work otherwise Ray might pop a vein.

I chuckled at her comment. It was true. He definitely needed to relax.

I stuffed my hands in my pockets and followed her back inside. “Can I say that you have the coolest job ever?”

She laughed, “No way! I work at a Starbucks.”

“Way! At least, I think so. Just think about it this way: you have all the coffee you want right there, all day long and it’s the best medicine for a hangover. Maybe it’s just me, since I’m a huge caffeine addict. I love coffee. I’ll probably get high on its aroma alone,” I got a little carried away. “It’s the good stuff, not coffee colored water like we get at work.”

“You really are an addict,” she laughed, putting on her apron and cap. “It was nice talking to you, but I’m officially on duty now and Ray is watching me like a hawk.”

“Good luck with that. I’ll see you around. We should meet up again soon.”

“Drop by sometime and we’ll arrange something.”

“I will,” I smiled in response. “See you later, Ray,” I said, leaving.

*

“You should have been nice to me. It wouldn’t cost you money.” I quietly sang along to Morrissey where I sat at the only, slightly off-kilter, table in my small apartment, which was somewhat clean for a change, all for Mikey’s arrival, drawing. “And on the moments when I fell down not for you to say, oh, I told you so.” For the first time in a very long time, my mind was at ease. I was enjoying a beer and I enjoyed drawing right then. Lately it felt like I was only drawing as a job. It wasn’t fun anymore, not something I loved like it used to be. However, here in my apartment, waiting for Mikey to join me in my messed up world, I couldn’t stop even if I wanted to. I loved it and I loved the image emerging on the paper before me.

It was crazy how lifted my spirits were thanks to Mikey moving in with me. I missed the kid and it would be great to have him here. It was like I knew that from now on everything would just be better. Things were going to change around here from now on.

A knock on the door drew my attention and I jumped up excitedly, hurrying to open up for my little brother.

“Hey, Gerard,” he smiled at me, one bag slung across his left shoulder and another in his right hand.

“Mikes.” I pulled him into a tight hug. You would never believe that I saw him only two weeks ago. I stepped back after letting him go and motioned for him to come inside. “Welcome to your new home.”

“Thank you,” he chuckled.

“Make yourself at home. Let me show you to your room

In truth the apartment only had one bedroom, but I was more than willing to let Mikey have it. It wasn’t like I used it much anyway. I’d still keep my clothes in there, but he could have the bed.

Mikey obediently followed me to the bedroom, but didn’t drop his things. “Isn’t this your room?”

“Not anymore. I’m going to sleep on the couch.”

“No, Gerard. I didn’t come here to take over your apartment. I insist that I sleep on the couch.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I argued. “I’m barely ever here anyway. I think the bed would appreciate it if someone used it for a change. Honestly, it’s no big deal.”

“Are you sure,” he asked uncertainly. “I don’t want to be a bother.”

“Mikey, you’re not a bother,” I replied almost exasperated. “Take the fucking bed. I’m fine on the couch.” After all, it’s where I slept basically all the time, possibly because that’s about as far as I usually get before passing out.

“Okay,” he muttered unconvinced. “But you’ll tell me the second you want your bed back. I mean we can always share too.”

I chuckled lightly. “I might take you up on that last offer one or two times.”

He dropped his stuff on the bed and we headed back to the living room.

“Morrissey, nice,” he grinned at the stereo and then taking in his surroundings.

“It’s not much, but you can live here.”

“What?” he looked at me with wide eyes. “No, this is great. Really! Thanks a lot for letting me come live with you for a while. It will help a lot while I find my feet.”

“No problem. You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like, indefinitely even.” I grinned at him. “You’ll notice that my cupboards are empty most of the time. We’ll have to go and get sustenance for the night.”

He nodded, digging his wallet out of his pocket. “Let me cover this time.”

“You can pay for the food,” I agreed. I would not let my brother pay for my addictions even if he didn’t know about it. Alcohol was definitely on the menu though, unless I wanted things to get bad. “We have to celebrate.”

*

Our little trip to the store didn’t take too long. On our return to the apartment, we made ourselves comfortable on the couch with a hamburger in one hand and a beer in the other.

“I think I’m going to like it here.”

“You definitely will. I love it here. For the most part, everything here is different from back home, the culture even the people. It’s quite an experience.”

“I’ll bet.” He looked excited to be here.

The greasy food was good, the company was great and several beers and cigarettes later, we were still on the couch talking, catching up, although we weren’t sitting as much as lying down. By this point we were both not too sober anymore either. Mikey was a light weight and the booze had affected him a lot more than it did me, but my honest side was starting to show. That’s how I knew I had alcohol in my system.

“I fucking hate my job.”

“What? Why?” Mikey asked confused. “I thought it’s what you wanted to do. You love drawing.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I love what I do. I just really hate my job.” My head was propped up on my elbow on the arm rest of the couch and Mikey was lying practically horizontally sprawled out on the rest of the couch. “I’ve worked there for longer than a year now and I don’t know any of the people I work with. The one person I did know recently left. Despite my time there, I haven’t gotten anywhere either.” I sighed, disappointed with my life. “I’m stuck in a dead end job. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not doing anything.” It frustrated me.

“Then quit.”

“I wish I could, but I have bills to pay and a lifestyle to uphold.”

Mikey started laughing. “What lifestyle?”

My alcoholic lifestyle, but of course I didn’t tell him that. “You know I can’t decrease my consumption of coffee and cigarettes.”

“Fair enough.” He let out a giggle.

“I’ll have to find another job first. But I will quit. All in good time.”

“Yeah, Gee,” he breathed deeply, turning on his side and shutting his eyes.

“Go to bed, Mikes.”

“Okay.” He suddenly sat up looking completely out of it and I couldn’t help laughing. “You cannot handle your alcohol.”

“I know,” he said with a stupid grin plastered on his face. “G’night, Gee.” He stood up and practically sleep walked to his room.

I chuckled quietly, lying back on the couch and staring up at the ceiling. Tonight was fun. It was nice having a familiar face around. There was snoring from the bedroom and I knew Mikey was fast asleep. Damn that was fast. I should probably get to sleep too. I had work in the morning. I sighed deeply, closing my eyes and waiting for sleep to come.