FicWad

i am limited

the pen is slipping through my fingers
while the water is slipping through the cracks

at night i cant seem to close my eyes and just drift away
i listen to the humming of my fan
the breeze come through my open window
the cars drive past
and taps of the animals' paws that roam in the dead of night

but the blinds are letting the sun creep through in the morning
and they don't cherish how he night hides flaws

the smiles i flash look blinding
but the stress they've been through over the years
the frowns that never spoke a word
but the laughs that were forged
and the cries were never heard
not by a soul

hidden away feelings for all the wrong reasons
the fear of everyone leaving
looms over my aching head
i think i tend to take more aspirin than needed
to stop my the pain in my throbbing head

now there's a six pack in my fridge and i don't recognize the label
minutes tick my and i still nothing happens
nothing seems to click

all i want to do is forget

let it slip from my memory
but no matter how loud my eyes scream
the fire still seems to burn out

and each time i look up in the sky
my heart still speeds in the adventure
and i wish i could take the chance

take a risk
that thought i could
and break down my walls

should i?

and maybe i would tell
but im scared you'll leave

the city is alive
even a the dead of night
but the neighborhood was alive
while i was not
when the sky bled into night
i didn't notice

i can't seem to stomach anything anymore
and i cant take i anymore

the light switch is broken
and my mind is more lightless than this room

a pathetic cry for help
the leather of the sofa is being worn and torn
but the glass of the coffee table is smudged
and those fingerprints won't seem to come off

waste of breath
forced words
bad grades
fabricated grins and giggles
silent pleas

i love your bones and i take a deep breath
i'm going to destroy the walls that have been wrecking me through the years
maybe i'll be more than just a joker
a faker and lie
i'll make it through the moments
and all the compass i have left

i am limitless

does this make sense? probs not
-abbie