Categories > TV > Power Rangers > Times Present, Times Past
Disclaimer: Business as usual
Disclaimer: Business as usual ...
Note I: Sorry about taking so long, everybody, but I was hit by a hefty dose of RealLife® plus a major case of Writer's Block. sigh Also, I realize this chapter is pretty short, but I figure you guys would prefer a little over an even longer wait ... wouldn't you? puts on puppy-dog eyes
Note II: Okay, from here on out it's gonna get slightly complicated. Obviously, the "Times Past" bit of this story is all but over, so I'll have to look for another way to tie up all the loose ends. Wish me luck? Other than that, enjoy, and leave a contribution in the feedback box on the way out, please? DB
Times Present, Times Past
Chapter 12: The Way We Were?
Angel Grove, the Present (late April 1998)
Helen Scott opened the door to Jason's room as quietly as possible. All the while, she was telling herself he was an adult, really too old for her to check up on, but she just couldn't help herself - after the scare she'd had with him disappearing just like that into a time hole, she felt a deep need to make sure her only son was safe and sound, sleeping in his own bed once more.
I am his mother, after all. I'm entitled to worry.
The past four days had been harrowing to the extreme, not knowing whether her baby boy still lived or would ever be returned to her. Silently, she thanked the Power Rangers, whoever they might be, for bringing him back. If there was ever a way to repay their efforts, she would take it without hesitation, but the Red Ranger had gracefully declined any offers and vanished once he'd deposited Jason and Billy in the Scotts' back yard.
To say that Helen had been shocked by Jason's appearance was putting it mildly; after she'd gotten over her crying jag (for sheer relief) and hugged the breath out of him, she'd taken one good look at him and had nearly started to weep all over again.
Jason had ... changed. Outwardly he was thinner, his body hardened and more muscled than she could recall, his hair was long and curly and he'd grown a full beard. Helen had understood only half, if that, of what Billy had tried to explain - that Jason and Katherine had spent more time in the past than had passed for all of them. She could accept the concept, after a fashion; it certainly accounted for his altered appearance. Impatiently, the blonde woman dismissed the thought. It didn't matter as long as she had her son back.
However, with a mother's instinct she realized that the changes in Jason went far deeper than weight loss and a generally unkempt exterior. No, there were shadows and depths in his dark eyes, along with an inexplicable sorrow, that she couldn't dismiss as easily. She'd tried sharing her feelings with her husband after Jason had gone to his room to rest, but John had only shrugged and told her she was imagining things.
Helen didn't think she was. Yes, she was as proud as John that Jason had managed to survive so long under very hard conditions, but she was sure that something had happened to put a look into his eyes that she'd seen only a few times on her job as a social worker. It was an expression usually worn only by people who'd been through one or another emotional wringer - like the freshly bereaved - or else by veterans of armed conflicts who'd lost more than they could bear, fighting for whatever cause.
In an unguarded moment over dinner last night, Jason had had that exact same look, and Helen was determined to find out why.
/I will know everything - eventually, /she resolved. I'll just let Jason readjust to being home again. Sooner or later, he is going to open up and will tell me, just like he used to when he was a little boy.
And in the meantime, while she waited, she'd make sure as she had then that he was sleeping soundly.
~*~
Slowly, the wooden door swung inward to Jason's room. It was still very early in the morning, the sun had barely started to peek over the distant mountains, tinting the sky with the reds and golds of early dawn, so Helen expected to see her son wrapped up in his blankets, snoring merrily away as he hid his face under the pillow. She stepped inside, her slippered feet hardly making a sound on the charcoal carpet, but froze in place when she could take a good look at the bed at last.
It was empty.
Helen barely stifled a cry. Rushing forward, she swept her eyes through the dim room. The covers were rumpled and the red-and-black-patterned blanket was missing, so Jason /had /been lying down at some point. But for how long, and where was he now?
He's too old and too big to hide in the closet as he used to do when he was a kid and woke up from a nightmare, she realized, which calmed her down a little. /And he's not gone downstairs; I would've heard him. /As Jason had found out years ago, much to his chagrin, the stairs to the first floor creaked loudly, which had put an early end to late-night fridge raids as well as prevented too many curfew violations. The light's out in the bathroom, too. Hmm.
A soft breeze wafted against Helen's hair. Only then did she notice that the window was partially open. She went over and peered out, scanning the garden below. No sign of her errant son there, either. Or ... was there? The weather had been nice lately, so John had taken the patio furniture out already; one of the loungers had been moved from the terrace to stand under the apple tree, and there was a darkish lump on it ... quickly, she made her way back downstairs. Exiting through the kitchen door, Helen crept closer to the white plastic recliner. She breathed a silent sigh of relief when she recognized Jason curled up under his blanket, sleeping heavily. Her first instinct was to wake him - he hadn't bothered to get the mattress, and the hard surface he was lying on must be quite uncomfortable; he'd be aching all over today - but ultimately decided against it. Jason needed rest more than anything, and if he preferred the open air to his room after so long with no proper roof over his head, she wasn't going to disturb him. Time to get him used to civilization again later.
Shaking her head, Helen went back into the house. The sky to the East was already turning from red to the usual bright morning blue, and at least one bird was trilling in the apple tree. It would be fully light soon, and maybe the smell of coffee would bring Jason inside eventually. With a thoughtful frown, she filled the carafe with fresh water. This'll only take five minutes.
~*~
The aromas wafting from the kitchen - fresh toast, coffee and frying bacon - indeed managed to rouse Jason from sleep, and he sat up groggily, resting his head on his drawn-up knees for a few moments to collect himself. Dawn had broken, and it promised to be another typical, warm California spring day. Pity that he was in no mood to appreciate it.
He was still feeling rather dazed at finding himself back home again. Not that he wasn't glad, it was just ... there were so many people around! And the noise, the different 'taste' and texture of air polluted by thousands of cars and whatnot ... even the water tasted horrible, nothing like the sweet freshness of the lake he'd gotten used to over the past two years.
Not years. Days only. Man, I still can't believe it, even after Dad showed me yesterday's paper and made me watch the news!
He wondered if Kat was experiencing the same kind of disorientation. It was very likely, but he still would've liked to ask her, to talk to her, compare reactions.
And hold her, kiss her ... no. Forget it. She's back with Tommy, where she belongs.
The thought hurt, as much as the near-certainty that there was very little chance he'd be able to see her before tomorrow's press conference; his parents were probably not going to let him out of their sight if they could help it.
The Hillards will be the same about Kat, most likely, he realized morosely and sighed. He was not looking forward to the press conference the next day. He dreaded having to face a bunch of curious reporters, who'd be asking a lot of probably stupid, intrusive and at worst insensitive questions. At least half of which neither he nor Kat would want to answer. Maybe I'd better try calling Kat anyway; we need to get our stories straight about what to tell people. If at all possible, I'd like to keep the information about differing time intervals to ourselves.
That was a conclusion Jason had come to while tossing and turning in his room last night, finding his bed too soft, the blankets too heavy, the walls seemingly closing in on him until he couldn't stand it anymore and had climbed out his window, to find a spot in the garden, out under the stars. The recliner had done nicely; it wasn't as comfortable as their bed of moss and fir boughs had been in the past, but that was okay. Tonight, he just might try the mattress.
Another decision he'd made, more painful than anything else, was to let go of Kat. After what he'd witnessed during their last few days in the past, and especially after seeing how she'd virtually fallen back straight into Tommy's arms on their arrival in the Power Chamber, he really hadn't much choice. It was the very last thing Jason wanted, but ... as far as he was concerned, what they'd had together had been borrowed time at best, an interlude for two lonely people seeking comfort in each other. Nothing more.
I have to step aside. Kat - and Tommy, if I'm lucky - will never know how much I wish for things to be different. We're back; it's over. I'll just have to deal as best I can.
It wasn't going to be easy, Jason knew. Quite likely, it was going to be even harder than living with his lovely blonde friend for two years without ever telling her about his true feelings had been. But for Kat's peace of mind, he'd do it. After all, she was the very last person he wanted to hurt; no need to complicate the situation they'd have to face eventually with Tommy by turning things into a sordid love triangle.
No way. Better if I just keep my mouth shut. She - no, they - mean too much to me; I just can't put my needs over theirs. Not again. End of story.
All that was left for him to do now was to convince himself.
Jason sighed despondently, wondering not for the first time which Higher Power he'd managed to piss off in a previous lifetime to make things this hard for him. He'd neither asked to have the fate of his world placed on his shoulders when barely sixteen nor dreamed that the one person he would seriously fall in love with would be his best friend's girlfriend.
It's not fair!
Unfortunately, life rarely was. And Jason had learned years ago to accept that unpalatable fact. He could do it again ... because he had to.
A loud rumbling sound coming from his midsection brought him out of his reverie, the accompanying hollow feeling reminding him that he'd hardly eaten anything last night - Jason had needed quiet and solitude much more than the hot meal his mother had served. But a proper cooked breakfast suddenly seemed extremely tempting.
Groaning slightly, Jason got up at last and slowly trudged towards the back door, trailing his blanket behind him like a very young child.
Helen was at the stove where she was transferring bacon rashers from the pan to kitchen paper, watching Jason come in. Her heart ached at the sight of him.
What happened to you, son? What did you go through in the past that made you lose your smile?
She promised herself that she'd do her utmost to give the laughter back to him. And she had a suspicion that she would have a willing partner in Doris Hillard, especially if Katherine was as touched by their ordeal as Jason.
I'll call her. But, later. First, I need to feed my baby.
Determinedly, she put the pan back onto the stove, turned the heat up and started to crack eggs.
~*~
Kat had had trouble sleeping as well, for many of the same reasons as Jason. Her mattress was too soft, the duvet too heavy, her room felt closed in, she missed the sounds of night and the soft breezes that had lulled her to sleep for the past two years. Her mind shied away from the realization that she also missed the feel of Jason lying next to her, holding her, his steady breathing and the rise and fall of his chest against her cheek a comforting staple of existence that banished all fears and loneliness. Eventually she'd drifted off, though, and was feeling reasonably rested when she awoke around mid-morning. She went down to breakfast, greeted her mother sleepily and inadvertently shocked that lady by immediately reaching for bread and whole milk, her face taking on a near-ecstatic expression.
"Oh, I missed this," she mumbled through a mouthful of fresh toast.
Doris was used to see Kat sip on a single glass of orange juice, to go with some yoghurt, fruit and maybe some low-fat cereal for breakfast. Now, she was liberally lacing her tea with sugar - quite a difference from her usual habit. She even reached for the butter, and was seriously eyeing the raspberry jam. It was enough to bring tears to Doris' eyes when she contemplated the deprivations her beloved daughter must've endured to wax so enthusiastic over what was really very basic, everyday food. She hadn't enjoyed the festive dinner they'd ordered in last night even half as much!
I wonder if Jason is acting like that, too ... I'll have to call Helen later, to compare notes and maybe get a clue on how to handle the situation, she thought, unknowingly echoing her new friend's plans.
To hide the emotions which threatened to overwhelm her, Mrs. Hillard left the kitchen and reached for her personal phone directory. It wasn't going to be enough to just feed her child, she reasoned; Kat could use some /serious /pampering. And she could certainly provide that; there were certain advantages to being the wife of a senior CEO of an international shipping firm, after all. And it would be a start, of sorts, to get things back to normal.
Let's see ...hair, skin, nails ...
The first number she dialled was that of her masseuse.
~*~
"How do you feel now, darling?" Kat's mother asked as the last of the people she'd called in had left by late afternoon. Her daughter smiled, running a neatly-manicured hand through her once-again shiny golden hair.
"Almost Human," she laughed. "That full-body massage was awesome. Thanks, Mum!"
"It's the least I can do for you, hon," Doris smiled back, albeit a bit mistily. "I thought you deserved a little TLC."
"You gave me more than 'a little' today," Kat replied, giving her mother a hug. "I'm almost ready to pass a mirror again." After getting what amounted to a full beauty treatment, she knew that she looked good, even in her comfortable sweats, and that fact gave her some much-needed confidence Kat suspected she was going to need the next day.
Now, if I can only find an outfit that still fits, I may just survive that dratted press conference tomorrow!
Kat was not looking forward to the event, although she had to agree that it was probably the best course to take since the media were already aware of both their disappearance and return. By consenting to a full briefing and an exclusive TV appearance on the Harvey Garvey show afterwards, the whole necessary evil could be dealt with in a single go.
Of course, it also meant that she was going to spend most of tomorrow in Jason's company again - without the chance of talking privately, most likely. Kat wasn't sure how to feel about that; on the one hand, she missed him more than she'd thought possible, and on the other she had absolutely no idea on how she was going to act in his presence. She could not pretend nothing had happened between them, but she also found herself unwilling to reveal just /how /close they'd become to anyone yet - namely, to Tommy. She sighed deeply.
If I only knew what to do ...I wish I could ask Mum! She knows about the two years, yes, but I just can't just come right out and tell her Jason and I were lovers, that we even had a baby /- she swallowed hard, fighting back tears that were still too close to the surface - and that I need advice on how to tell that to my boyfriend! She'll be disappointed, and shocked, and ...no. Just ... no. /
So, her mother was out as a confidante, at least for the present. Maybe - probably - she would tell her later. But who else was there to confide in? Almost immediately, a dark, pretty face with sympathetic eyes came to her.
Tanya. Of course. She's my best friend, and she likes Jason - enough to trust him with the keys to Auric's tiki at that time. Hopefully she'll understand, maybe even have an idea what I should do; as soon as I can, I'll try talking to her first.
That conversation wasn't going to be the easiest in the world, either, but forming that resolve made Kat feel a little better; now all she had to do was to wait until she could have a serious heart-to-heart with her best friend. Which would take a few days at least.
But at least it's a start of sorts ...
To fortify herself, she opened the fridge and reached for the jug of iced tea. Sweet, no less.
~*~
Feeling pleasantly drowsy, Kat curled up in her favorite armchair at the bay garden window a while later and picked up the book she'd started to read 'before'. It was a well-written historical novel set in the 17th century that had been quite engrossing when she'd begun reading, but for some reason she now found it impossible to identify with the heroine, or to get into the plot. Not when every sentence or paragraph describing the past reminded her of the time she'd spent in that exact period (according to what Tommy had reported, anyway).
Why does everything seem to come back to Tommy?
Kat sighed and reached for the dish of chocolate candy on the coffee table beside her. She did not want to deal with that particular problem - not now, not today when she was just getting used to being with her parents again. She knew she'd have to, eventually, but at the moment she preferred the sheer bliss of dark chocolate filled with cream exploding against her taste buds over more serious matters. Thinking about her boyfriend and what she was going to have to confess about her relationship with his best friend in the time they'd been missing would just have to wait for now.
It's not what I'll tell him, but when and how, /she mused, selecting another praline. Diet be damned for once; she had lost a lot of weight, and could afford to indulge herself a little. /Hopefully Tanya can help me there, too.
Licking her fingers clean, Kat was debating whether to give her novel another try or not when the phone rang. Startled, she jumped at the nearly-forgotten sound, then realized what it signified. Heart still hammering, she leaned over and gingerly picked up the mobile unit. Caller ID showed her the call came from Jason's number, and she thumbed the receiver on - her pulse now racing for quite another reason.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Kat." The deep voice seeped into her ear, bringing comfort and a calm that had eluded her all day.
"Hi yourself," she replied, a smile unconsciously blossoming around her mouth. She laid her book aside and tucked her knees up, snuggling into the chair's back. Twilight was near, and brought back a welter of memories. With the phone cradled close, she could almost imagine that they were back at their shelter watching the fire, or maybe sitting under a tree, looking out over the lake like they used to. Jason had often sat behind her, holding her against his chest while they talked, giving her backrubs ... or sometimes when they were just silent together. Those times had often been the only thing that made the harsh days bearable.
"How are you?" Kat asked, then could have kicked herself for saying such an inane thing. But her mind was strangely blank for a more serious topic - or any topic, for that matter.
"Doing okay," Jason replied. "It, um, it felt good to take a hot shower again."
/Brilliant, Scott. Is there a dumber thing you could've said? /To Jason's relief, Kat didn't seem to mind.
"Oh my, yes," Kat agreed fervently instead. "I took a long one last night, and had a real bath this morning. Bubbles, scented oil, the works. Sheer heaven!"
Jason chuckled appreciatively. "I should think so." He prayed that his voice wasn't giving away what the image of Kat stretched out in a hot tub, all rosy and warm, covered only by white lather, was doing to his imagination ... and his hormones. He swallowed surreptitiously. This was neither the time nor place to be thinking of her like that ... not anymore. That was another thing he'd resolved for himself practically the moment he knew they were back. Seeing Kat in Tommy's arms again had only clinched the matter. To cover his reaction, he lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "When I took that shower last night, I stayed in there long enough to use up all the hot water," he confessed. "Man, my Dad was pissed ... he didn't say anything, guess he thought I was kinda entitled, but the look he gave me ... if looks were pinpricks, you could've torn me apart at the perforation."
"Oh my," Kat giggled, amused by the image.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh," Jason grumbled good-naturedly. "I just didn't expect to enjoy it so much, y'know? I mean, showering is such a mundane thing ... and it's not as if we couldn't keep clean all that time."
His words served to squelch both their amusement as they were reminded of the time they'd shared cut off from every amenity.
"I know," Katherine murmured. "I find myself going ga-ga over the simplest things, too. Stuff I've so taken for granted ... like hot tea, or having fresh clothes in the morning. It's almost as if everything's new to me."
"Yeah."
Both pondered what had been said - and the myriad of things that hadn't, but which both knew they were sharing - in silence. However, for once that silence failed to comfort them; instead, it served only to remind them how much things had changed within a few hours.
For the better, Kat told herself. We're back where - when - we belong, we're safe, and things will be normal again soon. Like Tommy said.
The blonde dancer refused to examine whether she truly believed that ... or whether she was only trying to convince herself. She cleared her throat and deliberately changed the subject.
"So, why did you call? Has something come up?"
Jason was tempted to tell her the plain truth - that he missed her company. That he wanted to see her again, to talk to her in person, to hold her ... but no. He'd known for a while that, should they ever make it home, that this part of his life was over. And the sooner he got back on track, the better. To that purpose, he tamped down firmly on his emotions and made his voice as impersonal as he could.
"Actually, yes," he said. "My folks told me the details of what's going to happen tomorrow."
"The press conference," Kat groaned, grasping the implications right away. "God, I wish we didn't have to do that!"
"Me, too. But under the circumstances, I'm kinda glad that Harvey Garvey and all the media at once are the only public events we'll have to face."
"I guess," she said dubiously. "Still, I wish it were all over already."
"I hear you," Jason agreed. "Anyway, I thought we could just go over a few things ... get our stories straight about what we're going to tell people tomorrow."
Kat frowned. "That sounds rather ominous - as if we have to hide something," she wondered, puzzled. "We're going to tell the truth ... aren't we?"
There was a slight hesitation in Jason's voice when he answered. "Well, sorta," he hedged. "I mean, I'm okay with talking about how the area has changed, what kind of wildlife there was and stuff, but ... I'd rather keep quiet about the time discrepancy."
"Why?" Kat was honestly bewildered; it was hard enough to adjust to the fact that only four days had passed in 'real-time' rather than the two years she and Jason had lived through. Why should they keep that a secret when their friends and families already knew? "It's not as if we did something we have to be ashamed of ..."
/I'm not ashamed of having turned to Jason for comfort; I'm not! Some people may think we shouldn't have become involved, that we should have waited longer to be rescued, but ... they weren't there. If they had, they'd understand. /Kat honestly believed that, and yet there was a feeling of unease niggling at the back of her mind - the same she had experienced when she'd first made the decision to turn to Jason for more than companionship. What if they don't?
She shelved that thought for 'later' as well when Jason replied to her question.
"No. But do you really want to see news about our baby ... about Dorilene's death plastered all over the tabloids?" Jason queried, suddenly sounding very harsh. He wished he didn't have to spell it out. "Think, Kat. You know how some news people are. You read papers; you watch the news. Already the Angel Grove/ Clarion /has put out a special edition about our return, complete with the interview Carlos gave last night after the Rangers brought us home. The local channel ran a special bulletin last night, too, and I'd bet my morpher that it's going to be picked up by the networks sooner or later. I swear, if we do tell the truth about what happened between us all they're going to focus on is our relationship ... and how Tommy figures into it. I know and you know that we'll have to tell him eventually, but do you really want him to learn about what happened from a headline? Or from watching TV?"
Oh God, she hadn't even considered that! Why, oh why hadn't she thought to read the newspaper, or turned on the TV?
Because I didn't want to think. Because all I wanted was to escape from the world just a little while longer, safely hidden behind my parents.
"I ... no, of course not," Kat murmured, stricken. Both her mother and father had never said a word about the publicity their disappearance must've engendered, not even about the reporters' harassment the Rangers had mentioned. They'd been keeping her in the dark about events outside the house all day as if she was too young and immature to understand, not capable of dealing with problems ... quite likely with the best of intentions, and yet ... Suddenly, that rankled. A lot. She was not a child anymore, unable to cope with whatever came her way. The past two years - even if they only had gone by for Jason and herself - had taught her differently.
Have they ever!
It was high time, Kat realized, that she took her life into her own hands again. Starting with a few decisions about what to do and say the next day. She drew a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, you're right," she conceded to Jason who was still waiting for her reply. "I just haven't thought that far ahead."
"It's okay," he said, a bit gruffly. "So ... what do you think?"
"About what?"
He huffed. "I say we keep the true length of time that passed for us a secret," he elaborated. "For all everybody knows, we were stuck in the past for just the four days that passed here. That way, we can hopefully stop any kind of speculation."
"You think?" Kat asked, somewhat sceptically. "Well, let's hope you're right. But it's not going to be easy ..."
"No, probably not. But, remember we managed to keep our Ranger activities from becoming public knowledge; if we both guard what we say and stick to a few basic facts, it should be doable."
Kat pondered this for a minute. Her mind told her that Jason was correct, but some unacknowledged part of her (she refused to call it her heart; that belonged - again! - to Tommy) wanted nothing of it. In fact, whatever-it-was all but insisted on coming clean as soon as possible, on telling the world what had really happened. /If I only knew that clearly myself! /She ruthlessly shoved the insidious thought out of the way, ignoring the hollow feeling spreading inside her.
"Possibly," she mused at last. "What exactly did you have in mind?"
Jason proceeded to explain. The pair spent the next half hour synchronizing what they were going to say to the reporters the next day. When they were done, Kat expected to feel satisfied that they weren't going to provide even more fodder for the sensationalist media ... and she did, but at the same time she experienced a very strange sensation ... as if by denying what they'd shared they were almost betraying each other.
And what about our baby?
That memory still hurt too much to look at closely, so she shied away from it. It wasn't something she could ask Jason - or anyone else, for that matter - over the phone anyway. She wanted, and needed, to see the eyes of whoever she was going to tell it to, to be able to gauge their reaction up close and hopefully find comfort in a sympathetic look at least ... or a loving hug at best.
However, Katherine voiced none of this. For one thing, she felt too hurt by Jason's apparent indifference, and for another she was starting to grow very weary again - almost as if the discussion was draining what little energy the day of pampering had given her. It was probably better - certainly easier - to let matters rest, at least for the time being. Right now, Kat was sure, 'easy' was all she could cope with.
"That's all, then?" she asked numbly. Their conversation had come to a close a couple of minutes ago, and the silence was growing uncomfortable. And yet, Kat couldn't bring herself to end the call.
"I think so," Jason replied heavily. There was so much he still wanted to say, to ask ... heck, if he was honest with himself, he only wanted to keep listening to that softly-accented voice, to not lose whatever tentative connection they still shared. Try as he might, though, he could not think of anything else.
"Right. Okay."
For a second, he imagined that Kat was about to speak again, but no - there was only more silence coming through the line. Maybe a forlorn little sigh, but ... that was hardly enough to keep them going. Reluctantly, he said what he had to.
"See you tomorrow, then?"
"Uh huh. Sleep well," Kat murmured, barely audible.
"You, too. Night." He bit back the endearment hovering on the tip of his tongue.
"Good night."
Before either could be tempted to blurt out something they might regret, both simultaneously switched off their phones. And it was only in the privacy of their minds that Jason and Kat acknowledged they wished the faint click of disconnection hadn't sounded like a bell of doom.
To Be Continued ...
Disclaimer: Business as usual ...
Note I: Sorry about taking so long, everybody, but I was hit by a hefty dose of RealLife® plus a major case of Writer's Block. sigh Also, I realize this chapter is pretty short, but I figure you guys would prefer a little over an even longer wait ... wouldn't you? puts on puppy-dog eyes
Note II: Okay, from here on out it's gonna get slightly complicated. Obviously, the "Times Past" bit of this story is all but over, so I'll have to look for another way to tie up all the loose ends. Wish me luck? Other than that, enjoy, and leave a contribution in the feedback box on the way out, please? DB
Times Present, Times Past
Chapter 12: The Way We Were?
Angel Grove, the Present (late April 1998)
Helen Scott opened the door to Jason's room as quietly as possible. All the while, she was telling herself he was an adult, really too old for her to check up on, but she just couldn't help herself - after the scare she'd had with him disappearing just like that into a time hole, she felt a deep need to make sure her only son was safe and sound, sleeping in his own bed once more.
I am his mother, after all. I'm entitled to worry.
The past four days had been harrowing to the extreme, not knowing whether her baby boy still lived or would ever be returned to her. Silently, she thanked the Power Rangers, whoever they might be, for bringing him back. If there was ever a way to repay their efforts, she would take it without hesitation, but the Red Ranger had gracefully declined any offers and vanished once he'd deposited Jason and Billy in the Scotts' back yard.
To say that Helen had been shocked by Jason's appearance was putting it mildly; after she'd gotten over her crying jag (for sheer relief) and hugged the breath out of him, she'd taken one good look at him and had nearly started to weep all over again.
Jason had ... changed. Outwardly he was thinner, his body hardened and more muscled than she could recall, his hair was long and curly and he'd grown a full beard. Helen had understood only half, if that, of what Billy had tried to explain - that Jason and Katherine had spent more time in the past than had passed for all of them. She could accept the concept, after a fashion; it certainly accounted for his altered appearance. Impatiently, the blonde woman dismissed the thought. It didn't matter as long as she had her son back.
However, with a mother's instinct she realized that the changes in Jason went far deeper than weight loss and a generally unkempt exterior. No, there were shadows and depths in his dark eyes, along with an inexplicable sorrow, that she couldn't dismiss as easily. She'd tried sharing her feelings with her husband after Jason had gone to his room to rest, but John had only shrugged and told her she was imagining things.
Helen didn't think she was. Yes, she was as proud as John that Jason had managed to survive so long under very hard conditions, but she was sure that something had happened to put a look into his eyes that she'd seen only a few times on her job as a social worker. It was an expression usually worn only by people who'd been through one or another emotional wringer - like the freshly bereaved - or else by veterans of armed conflicts who'd lost more than they could bear, fighting for whatever cause.
In an unguarded moment over dinner last night, Jason had had that exact same look, and Helen was determined to find out why.
/I will know everything - eventually, /she resolved. I'll just let Jason readjust to being home again. Sooner or later, he is going to open up and will tell me, just like he used to when he was a little boy.
And in the meantime, while she waited, she'd make sure as she had then that he was sleeping soundly.
~*~
Slowly, the wooden door swung inward to Jason's room. It was still very early in the morning, the sun had barely started to peek over the distant mountains, tinting the sky with the reds and golds of early dawn, so Helen expected to see her son wrapped up in his blankets, snoring merrily away as he hid his face under the pillow. She stepped inside, her slippered feet hardly making a sound on the charcoal carpet, but froze in place when she could take a good look at the bed at last.
It was empty.
Helen barely stifled a cry. Rushing forward, she swept her eyes through the dim room. The covers were rumpled and the red-and-black-patterned blanket was missing, so Jason /had /been lying down at some point. But for how long, and where was he now?
He's too old and too big to hide in the closet as he used to do when he was a kid and woke up from a nightmare, she realized, which calmed her down a little. /And he's not gone downstairs; I would've heard him. /As Jason had found out years ago, much to his chagrin, the stairs to the first floor creaked loudly, which had put an early end to late-night fridge raids as well as prevented too many curfew violations. The light's out in the bathroom, too. Hmm.
A soft breeze wafted against Helen's hair. Only then did she notice that the window was partially open. She went over and peered out, scanning the garden below. No sign of her errant son there, either. Or ... was there? The weather had been nice lately, so John had taken the patio furniture out already; one of the loungers had been moved from the terrace to stand under the apple tree, and there was a darkish lump on it ... quickly, she made her way back downstairs. Exiting through the kitchen door, Helen crept closer to the white plastic recliner. She breathed a silent sigh of relief when she recognized Jason curled up under his blanket, sleeping heavily. Her first instinct was to wake him - he hadn't bothered to get the mattress, and the hard surface he was lying on must be quite uncomfortable; he'd be aching all over today - but ultimately decided against it. Jason needed rest more than anything, and if he preferred the open air to his room after so long with no proper roof over his head, she wasn't going to disturb him. Time to get him used to civilization again later.
Shaking her head, Helen went back into the house. The sky to the East was already turning from red to the usual bright morning blue, and at least one bird was trilling in the apple tree. It would be fully light soon, and maybe the smell of coffee would bring Jason inside eventually. With a thoughtful frown, she filled the carafe with fresh water. This'll only take five minutes.
~*~
The aromas wafting from the kitchen - fresh toast, coffee and frying bacon - indeed managed to rouse Jason from sleep, and he sat up groggily, resting his head on his drawn-up knees for a few moments to collect himself. Dawn had broken, and it promised to be another typical, warm California spring day. Pity that he was in no mood to appreciate it.
He was still feeling rather dazed at finding himself back home again. Not that he wasn't glad, it was just ... there were so many people around! And the noise, the different 'taste' and texture of air polluted by thousands of cars and whatnot ... even the water tasted horrible, nothing like the sweet freshness of the lake he'd gotten used to over the past two years.
Not years. Days only. Man, I still can't believe it, even after Dad showed me yesterday's paper and made me watch the news!
He wondered if Kat was experiencing the same kind of disorientation. It was very likely, but he still would've liked to ask her, to talk to her, compare reactions.
And hold her, kiss her ... no. Forget it. She's back with Tommy, where she belongs.
The thought hurt, as much as the near-certainty that there was very little chance he'd be able to see her before tomorrow's press conference; his parents were probably not going to let him out of their sight if they could help it.
The Hillards will be the same about Kat, most likely, he realized morosely and sighed. He was not looking forward to the press conference the next day. He dreaded having to face a bunch of curious reporters, who'd be asking a lot of probably stupid, intrusive and at worst insensitive questions. At least half of which neither he nor Kat would want to answer. Maybe I'd better try calling Kat anyway; we need to get our stories straight about what to tell people. If at all possible, I'd like to keep the information about differing time intervals to ourselves.
That was a conclusion Jason had come to while tossing and turning in his room last night, finding his bed too soft, the blankets too heavy, the walls seemingly closing in on him until he couldn't stand it anymore and had climbed out his window, to find a spot in the garden, out under the stars. The recliner had done nicely; it wasn't as comfortable as their bed of moss and fir boughs had been in the past, but that was okay. Tonight, he just might try the mattress.
Another decision he'd made, more painful than anything else, was to let go of Kat. After what he'd witnessed during their last few days in the past, and especially after seeing how she'd virtually fallen back straight into Tommy's arms on their arrival in the Power Chamber, he really hadn't much choice. It was the very last thing Jason wanted, but ... as far as he was concerned, what they'd had together had been borrowed time at best, an interlude for two lonely people seeking comfort in each other. Nothing more.
I have to step aside. Kat - and Tommy, if I'm lucky - will never know how much I wish for things to be different. We're back; it's over. I'll just have to deal as best I can.
It wasn't going to be easy, Jason knew. Quite likely, it was going to be even harder than living with his lovely blonde friend for two years without ever telling her about his true feelings had been. But for Kat's peace of mind, he'd do it. After all, she was the very last person he wanted to hurt; no need to complicate the situation they'd have to face eventually with Tommy by turning things into a sordid love triangle.
No way. Better if I just keep my mouth shut. She - no, they - mean too much to me; I just can't put my needs over theirs. Not again. End of story.
All that was left for him to do now was to convince himself.
Jason sighed despondently, wondering not for the first time which Higher Power he'd managed to piss off in a previous lifetime to make things this hard for him. He'd neither asked to have the fate of his world placed on his shoulders when barely sixteen nor dreamed that the one person he would seriously fall in love with would be his best friend's girlfriend.
It's not fair!
Unfortunately, life rarely was. And Jason had learned years ago to accept that unpalatable fact. He could do it again ... because he had to.
A loud rumbling sound coming from his midsection brought him out of his reverie, the accompanying hollow feeling reminding him that he'd hardly eaten anything last night - Jason had needed quiet and solitude much more than the hot meal his mother had served. But a proper cooked breakfast suddenly seemed extremely tempting.
Groaning slightly, Jason got up at last and slowly trudged towards the back door, trailing his blanket behind him like a very young child.
Helen was at the stove where she was transferring bacon rashers from the pan to kitchen paper, watching Jason come in. Her heart ached at the sight of him.
What happened to you, son? What did you go through in the past that made you lose your smile?
She promised herself that she'd do her utmost to give the laughter back to him. And she had a suspicion that she would have a willing partner in Doris Hillard, especially if Katherine was as touched by their ordeal as Jason.
I'll call her. But, later. First, I need to feed my baby.
Determinedly, she put the pan back onto the stove, turned the heat up and started to crack eggs.
~*~
Kat had had trouble sleeping as well, for many of the same reasons as Jason. Her mattress was too soft, the duvet too heavy, her room felt closed in, she missed the sounds of night and the soft breezes that had lulled her to sleep for the past two years. Her mind shied away from the realization that she also missed the feel of Jason lying next to her, holding her, his steady breathing and the rise and fall of his chest against her cheek a comforting staple of existence that banished all fears and loneliness. Eventually she'd drifted off, though, and was feeling reasonably rested when she awoke around mid-morning. She went down to breakfast, greeted her mother sleepily and inadvertently shocked that lady by immediately reaching for bread and whole milk, her face taking on a near-ecstatic expression.
"Oh, I missed this," she mumbled through a mouthful of fresh toast.
Doris was used to see Kat sip on a single glass of orange juice, to go with some yoghurt, fruit and maybe some low-fat cereal for breakfast. Now, she was liberally lacing her tea with sugar - quite a difference from her usual habit. She even reached for the butter, and was seriously eyeing the raspberry jam. It was enough to bring tears to Doris' eyes when she contemplated the deprivations her beloved daughter must've endured to wax so enthusiastic over what was really very basic, everyday food. She hadn't enjoyed the festive dinner they'd ordered in last night even half as much!
I wonder if Jason is acting like that, too ... I'll have to call Helen later, to compare notes and maybe get a clue on how to handle the situation, she thought, unknowingly echoing her new friend's plans.
To hide the emotions which threatened to overwhelm her, Mrs. Hillard left the kitchen and reached for her personal phone directory. It wasn't going to be enough to just feed her child, she reasoned; Kat could use some /serious /pampering. And she could certainly provide that; there were certain advantages to being the wife of a senior CEO of an international shipping firm, after all. And it would be a start, of sorts, to get things back to normal.
Let's see ...hair, skin, nails ...
The first number she dialled was that of her masseuse.
~*~
"How do you feel now, darling?" Kat's mother asked as the last of the people she'd called in had left by late afternoon. Her daughter smiled, running a neatly-manicured hand through her once-again shiny golden hair.
"Almost Human," she laughed. "That full-body massage was awesome. Thanks, Mum!"
"It's the least I can do for you, hon," Doris smiled back, albeit a bit mistily. "I thought you deserved a little TLC."
"You gave me more than 'a little' today," Kat replied, giving her mother a hug. "I'm almost ready to pass a mirror again." After getting what amounted to a full beauty treatment, she knew that she looked good, even in her comfortable sweats, and that fact gave her some much-needed confidence Kat suspected she was going to need the next day.
Now, if I can only find an outfit that still fits, I may just survive that dratted press conference tomorrow!
Kat was not looking forward to the event, although she had to agree that it was probably the best course to take since the media were already aware of both their disappearance and return. By consenting to a full briefing and an exclusive TV appearance on the Harvey Garvey show afterwards, the whole necessary evil could be dealt with in a single go.
Of course, it also meant that she was going to spend most of tomorrow in Jason's company again - without the chance of talking privately, most likely. Kat wasn't sure how to feel about that; on the one hand, she missed him more than she'd thought possible, and on the other she had absolutely no idea on how she was going to act in his presence. She could not pretend nothing had happened between them, but she also found herself unwilling to reveal just /how /close they'd become to anyone yet - namely, to Tommy. She sighed deeply.
If I only knew what to do ...I wish I could ask Mum! She knows about the two years, yes, but I just can't just come right out and tell her Jason and I were lovers, that we even had a baby /- she swallowed hard, fighting back tears that were still too close to the surface - and that I need advice on how to tell that to my boyfriend! She'll be disappointed, and shocked, and ...no. Just ... no. /
So, her mother was out as a confidante, at least for the present. Maybe - probably - she would tell her later. But who else was there to confide in? Almost immediately, a dark, pretty face with sympathetic eyes came to her.
Tanya. Of course. She's my best friend, and she likes Jason - enough to trust him with the keys to Auric's tiki at that time. Hopefully she'll understand, maybe even have an idea what I should do; as soon as I can, I'll try talking to her first.
That conversation wasn't going to be the easiest in the world, either, but forming that resolve made Kat feel a little better; now all she had to do was to wait until she could have a serious heart-to-heart with her best friend. Which would take a few days at least.
But at least it's a start of sorts ...
To fortify herself, she opened the fridge and reached for the jug of iced tea. Sweet, no less.
~*~
Feeling pleasantly drowsy, Kat curled up in her favorite armchair at the bay garden window a while later and picked up the book she'd started to read 'before'. It was a well-written historical novel set in the 17th century that had been quite engrossing when she'd begun reading, but for some reason she now found it impossible to identify with the heroine, or to get into the plot. Not when every sentence or paragraph describing the past reminded her of the time she'd spent in that exact period (according to what Tommy had reported, anyway).
Why does everything seem to come back to Tommy?
Kat sighed and reached for the dish of chocolate candy on the coffee table beside her. She did not want to deal with that particular problem - not now, not today when she was just getting used to being with her parents again. She knew she'd have to, eventually, but at the moment she preferred the sheer bliss of dark chocolate filled with cream exploding against her taste buds over more serious matters. Thinking about her boyfriend and what she was going to have to confess about her relationship with his best friend in the time they'd been missing would just have to wait for now.
It's not what I'll tell him, but when and how, /she mused, selecting another praline. Diet be damned for once; she had lost a lot of weight, and could afford to indulge herself a little. /Hopefully Tanya can help me there, too.
Licking her fingers clean, Kat was debating whether to give her novel another try or not when the phone rang. Startled, she jumped at the nearly-forgotten sound, then realized what it signified. Heart still hammering, she leaned over and gingerly picked up the mobile unit. Caller ID showed her the call came from Jason's number, and she thumbed the receiver on - her pulse now racing for quite another reason.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Kat." The deep voice seeped into her ear, bringing comfort and a calm that had eluded her all day.
"Hi yourself," she replied, a smile unconsciously blossoming around her mouth. She laid her book aside and tucked her knees up, snuggling into the chair's back. Twilight was near, and brought back a welter of memories. With the phone cradled close, she could almost imagine that they were back at their shelter watching the fire, or maybe sitting under a tree, looking out over the lake like they used to. Jason had often sat behind her, holding her against his chest while they talked, giving her backrubs ... or sometimes when they were just silent together. Those times had often been the only thing that made the harsh days bearable.
"How are you?" Kat asked, then could have kicked herself for saying such an inane thing. But her mind was strangely blank for a more serious topic - or any topic, for that matter.
"Doing okay," Jason replied. "It, um, it felt good to take a hot shower again."
/Brilliant, Scott. Is there a dumber thing you could've said? /To Jason's relief, Kat didn't seem to mind.
"Oh my, yes," Kat agreed fervently instead. "I took a long one last night, and had a real bath this morning. Bubbles, scented oil, the works. Sheer heaven!"
Jason chuckled appreciatively. "I should think so." He prayed that his voice wasn't giving away what the image of Kat stretched out in a hot tub, all rosy and warm, covered only by white lather, was doing to his imagination ... and his hormones. He swallowed surreptitiously. This was neither the time nor place to be thinking of her like that ... not anymore. That was another thing he'd resolved for himself practically the moment he knew they were back. Seeing Kat in Tommy's arms again had only clinched the matter. To cover his reaction, he lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "When I took that shower last night, I stayed in there long enough to use up all the hot water," he confessed. "Man, my Dad was pissed ... he didn't say anything, guess he thought I was kinda entitled, but the look he gave me ... if looks were pinpricks, you could've torn me apart at the perforation."
"Oh my," Kat giggled, amused by the image.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh," Jason grumbled good-naturedly. "I just didn't expect to enjoy it so much, y'know? I mean, showering is such a mundane thing ... and it's not as if we couldn't keep clean all that time."
His words served to squelch both their amusement as they were reminded of the time they'd shared cut off from every amenity.
"I know," Katherine murmured. "I find myself going ga-ga over the simplest things, too. Stuff I've so taken for granted ... like hot tea, or having fresh clothes in the morning. It's almost as if everything's new to me."
"Yeah."
Both pondered what had been said - and the myriad of things that hadn't, but which both knew they were sharing - in silence. However, for once that silence failed to comfort them; instead, it served only to remind them how much things had changed within a few hours.
For the better, Kat told herself. We're back where - when - we belong, we're safe, and things will be normal again soon. Like Tommy said.
The blonde dancer refused to examine whether she truly believed that ... or whether she was only trying to convince herself. She cleared her throat and deliberately changed the subject.
"So, why did you call? Has something come up?"
Jason was tempted to tell her the plain truth - that he missed her company. That he wanted to see her again, to talk to her in person, to hold her ... but no. He'd known for a while that, should they ever make it home, that this part of his life was over. And the sooner he got back on track, the better. To that purpose, he tamped down firmly on his emotions and made his voice as impersonal as he could.
"Actually, yes," he said. "My folks told me the details of what's going to happen tomorrow."
"The press conference," Kat groaned, grasping the implications right away. "God, I wish we didn't have to do that!"
"Me, too. But under the circumstances, I'm kinda glad that Harvey Garvey and all the media at once are the only public events we'll have to face."
"I guess," she said dubiously. "Still, I wish it were all over already."
"I hear you," Jason agreed. "Anyway, I thought we could just go over a few things ... get our stories straight about what we're going to tell people tomorrow."
Kat frowned. "That sounds rather ominous - as if we have to hide something," she wondered, puzzled. "We're going to tell the truth ... aren't we?"
There was a slight hesitation in Jason's voice when he answered. "Well, sorta," he hedged. "I mean, I'm okay with talking about how the area has changed, what kind of wildlife there was and stuff, but ... I'd rather keep quiet about the time discrepancy."
"Why?" Kat was honestly bewildered; it was hard enough to adjust to the fact that only four days had passed in 'real-time' rather than the two years she and Jason had lived through. Why should they keep that a secret when their friends and families already knew? "It's not as if we did something we have to be ashamed of ..."
/I'm not ashamed of having turned to Jason for comfort; I'm not! Some people may think we shouldn't have become involved, that we should have waited longer to be rescued, but ... they weren't there. If they had, they'd understand. /Kat honestly believed that, and yet there was a feeling of unease niggling at the back of her mind - the same she had experienced when she'd first made the decision to turn to Jason for more than companionship. What if they don't?
She shelved that thought for 'later' as well when Jason replied to her question.
"No. But do you really want to see news about our baby ... about Dorilene's death plastered all over the tabloids?" Jason queried, suddenly sounding very harsh. He wished he didn't have to spell it out. "Think, Kat. You know how some news people are. You read papers; you watch the news. Already the Angel Grove/ Clarion /has put out a special edition about our return, complete with the interview Carlos gave last night after the Rangers brought us home. The local channel ran a special bulletin last night, too, and I'd bet my morpher that it's going to be picked up by the networks sooner or later. I swear, if we do tell the truth about what happened between us all they're going to focus on is our relationship ... and how Tommy figures into it. I know and you know that we'll have to tell him eventually, but do you really want him to learn about what happened from a headline? Or from watching TV?"
Oh God, she hadn't even considered that! Why, oh why hadn't she thought to read the newspaper, or turned on the TV?
Because I didn't want to think. Because all I wanted was to escape from the world just a little while longer, safely hidden behind my parents.
"I ... no, of course not," Kat murmured, stricken. Both her mother and father had never said a word about the publicity their disappearance must've engendered, not even about the reporters' harassment the Rangers had mentioned. They'd been keeping her in the dark about events outside the house all day as if she was too young and immature to understand, not capable of dealing with problems ... quite likely with the best of intentions, and yet ... Suddenly, that rankled. A lot. She was not a child anymore, unable to cope with whatever came her way. The past two years - even if they only had gone by for Jason and herself - had taught her differently.
Have they ever!
It was high time, Kat realized, that she took her life into her own hands again. Starting with a few decisions about what to do and say the next day. She drew a deep breath.
"I'm sorry, you're right," she conceded to Jason who was still waiting for her reply. "I just haven't thought that far ahead."
"It's okay," he said, a bit gruffly. "So ... what do you think?"
"About what?"
He huffed. "I say we keep the true length of time that passed for us a secret," he elaborated. "For all everybody knows, we were stuck in the past for just the four days that passed here. That way, we can hopefully stop any kind of speculation."
"You think?" Kat asked, somewhat sceptically. "Well, let's hope you're right. But it's not going to be easy ..."
"No, probably not. But, remember we managed to keep our Ranger activities from becoming public knowledge; if we both guard what we say and stick to a few basic facts, it should be doable."
Kat pondered this for a minute. Her mind told her that Jason was correct, but some unacknowledged part of her (she refused to call it her heart; that belonged - again! - to Tommy) wanted nothing of it. In fact, whatever-it-was all but insisted on coming clean as soon as possible, on telling the world what had really happened. /If I only knew that clearly myself! /She ruthlessly shoved the insidious thought out of the way, ignoring the hollow feeling spreading inside her.
"Possibly," she mused at last. "What exactly did you have in mind?"
Jason proceeded to explain. The pair spent the next half hour synchronizing what they were going to say to the reporters the next day. When they were done, Kat expected to feel satisfied that they weren't going to provide even more fodder for the sensationalist media ... and she did, but at the same time she experienced a very strange sensation ... as if by denying what they'd shared they were almost betraying each other.
And what about our baby?
That memory still hurt too much to look at closely, so she shied away from it. It wasn't something she could ask Jason - or anyone else, for that matter - over the phone anyway. She wanted, and needed, to see the eyes of whoever she was going to tell it to, to be able to gauge their reaction up close and hopefully find comfort in a sympathetic look at least ... or a loving hug at best.
However, Katherine voiced none of this. For one thing, she felt too hurt by Jason's apparent indifference, and for another she was starting to grow very weary again - almost as if the discussion was draining what little energy the day of pampering had given her. It was probably better - certainly easier - to let matters rest, at least for the time being. Right now, Kat was sure, 'easy' was all she could cope with.
"That's all, then?" she asked numbly. Their conversation had come to a close a couple of minutes ago, and the silence was growing uncomfortable. And yet, Kat couldn't bring herself to end the call.
"I think so," Jason replied heavily. There was so much he still wanted to say, to ask ... heck, if he was honest with himself, he only wanted to keep listening to that softly-accented voice, to not lose whatever tentative connection they still shared. Try as he might, though, he could not think of anything else.
"Right. Okay."
For a second, he imagined that Kat was about to speak again, but no - there was only more silence coming through the line. Maybe a forlorn little sigh, but ... that was hardly enough to keep them going. Reluctantly, he said what he had to.
"See you tomorrow, then?"
"Uh huh. Sleep well," Kat murmured, barely audible.
"You, too. Night." He bit back the endearment hovering on the tip of his tongue.
"Good night."
Before either could be tempted to blurt out something they might regret, both simultaneously switched off their phones. And it was only in the privacy of their minds that Jason and Kat acknowledged they wished the faint click of disconnection hadn't sounded like a bell of doom.
To Be Continued ...
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