Categories > Original > Drama > Euphoria VI
Subject: Kenzo
On a new-looking apartment complex on the other side of Tokyo, a Korean youth set a picture of his family on a dusty shelf and hit play on his tape recorder.
“Hello, I’m Thomas,” he said in a dusty mirror. “So glad to meet you.” The youth admired the bright, clear day from the window and began to dance to the hip-hop filling the empty room. Kenzo arrived alone in Japan last night. He had to find a new home for his family. Around midnight, he found this apartment. After unpacking and cleaning up the place and himself, everything began to settle in. Kenzo stepped outside and took in a breath of the Japanese air. Next door, a woman and her son stepped outside. Kenzo looked up at the moment the boy of six years old walked over.
“Hello, I’m Kenzo,” he said, bowing. “So glad to meet you.”
“Hello,” the child said.
“Misao! Come here! Come here!” his mother shouted. “Don’t talk to him for fuck’s sake!” Kenzo sighed as the woman walked away ranting. Minutes later, he made phone call on a payphone outside the apartment.
“(Hello? Hi, mama. Everything is great. Everything is great. Yes, I found an apartment. Oh, it’s cool, super cool. Wait until you see it. Every luxury. Incredible! A job…?)” Kenzo looked outside of the phone booth. He spotted a trash man picking up garbage from the can outside. “(I’m a trash man. Yes, a trash man. It’s so easy. They have these machines that…)” Then the phone got disconnected.
“(Hello?)” Kenzo asked. “(Mama? Mama?)” He hung up and pulled out the calling card.
“(Shit,)” he muttered.
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“I bought this card for 120 minutes. I speak for two minutes. Nothing left,” Kenzo complained at the convenience store down the street.
“You want to buy another card?” the tired-eyed clerk asked.
“No, no, no, no,” Kenzo said. “My mother, she’ll be very upset.”
“It’s fifty yen,” the clerk said. Kenzo dug in his pockets and only came up with ten yen.
“Fifty yen,” the clerk repeated. He happened to look up and notice two boys stuffing candy down their shirts.
“Oi! Oi, what you doing?” he shouted. “Come here. I told you kids what I'd do last time!” The clerk ran over and tackled the kids.
“Fucking kick him, Yu!” one of the boys yelled. His friend tried to and the struggle ensured as Kenzo looked on.
“Kick him harder!” the brat shouted. “Gaigin cunt!” Kenzo grabbed the boy by the arm.
“Cunt is a very bad word,” he said. “Even in Japan, I think. Yes?” The boy nodded with a blank stare. Kenzo turned to the clerk.
“What is this ‘gaigin’ that they call you?” he asked. “Is that bad?”
“I'm from Okinawa and I hate Gaigin,” the clerk said. Kenzo turned back to the kid.
“So, you see? Disrespectful,” he said. “Now, go and play. Go!” The two boys took off running out of the store. Kenzo handed the clerk’s bat back, smiling.
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Kenzo sat at the bus station with his new bag full of mochi balls. He began chewing down.
“Mmmm,” he said. “Oh! Mmmm. Ah!” On the other side, Darcy, Nadine, and Lilith sat waiting for the bus.
“Wow! You've got a wacker lot of mochi,” Lilith said. Kenzo put down the mochi.
“Yes,” he said. “Of course, I have too many.” He handed her the bag.
“Crazy. Ta,” Lilith said. She chewed down as Kenzo offered the mochi to Darcy and Nadine.
“No, thanks,” Darcy said. Nadine waved him off.
“They don't do mochi,” Lilith said with a full mouth.
“I see,” Kenzo said. “So, what does she do?”
“Drugs,” Lilith said. “We've just been to buy some skunky, haven't we, girls?” She picked up a blunt and took a smoke. She reached into the bag for another mochi ball.
“I can do six of these no problem, except Mum hides them behind the fridge-freezer,” Lilith said. “Wow! This is blimmin' amazing! But I need juicing.”
“You need juicing?” Nadine asked.
“Yeah. Chuck us the Orange-apple, would you, Dine?” Lilith asked. Nadine handed her the open bottle. She took a drink and held up the bottle.
“Barry!” Lilith said.
“What are you talking about?” Darcy asked.
“Uncle Jock always says ‘Barry’ when he drinks Orange-apple,” Lilith said. “I don't know why, Mum says it's because he's Scottish and mad.”
“Hello. My name is Kenzo,” he said, bowing. “I'm so glad to meet you.”
“Darcy,” Darcy said. “So glad to meet you.”
“I came yesterday, from South Korea,” Kenzo said. “This place is exceedingly cold.” He rubbed his hands together, breathing on them.
“Bummer,” Nadine said. Suddenly, Lilith froze.
“Oh. Hell's bells,” she said. She began throwing up on the street. Darcy and Nadine turned away.
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Kenzo had to carry Lilith over his shoulder as he followed Nadine and Darcy back to Darcy’s house. The latter unlocked the door and let her friends inside.
“This way,” Darcy said, heading down the hall. Kenzo looked around like a child seeing something shiny for the first time.
“Incroyable,” he said.
“Sorry?” Darcy asked.
“Your house, it’s incredible.”
“Thanks.” Darcy went up the stairs. “Come on. Bring the dozy cow up here.” Kenzo followed her up the stairs and sat Lilith down in a chair. She began to throw up a little more.
“I think maybe these doughnuts are not good for you,” Kenzo said. Lilith started snoring.
“Yeah, that must be it,” Darcy said. She paused when she heard giggling and moaning. “Mum? Mum?” She began walking to her mother’s bedroom door.
“Shit! Where's my...?” a man asked. “Oh, for fuck's sake. Jesus Christ!”
“Put your trousers on,” Katie said. Darcy opened the door to find a man getting dressed and her mother wrapped up in bed sheets.
“Darcy, what are you, er, doing here?” Katie asked.
“Lilith puked,” her daughter said.
“Uh… Uh… You know John, don't you?” Katie asked.
“Hi,” John said, putting on his glasses.
“He's been helping me with my, erm, my project.”
“Right, yeah. It's really interesting, isn't it?” John buttoned up his shirt.
“Yeah.”
“Hello. My name is Kenzo,” Kenzo said as he walked into the room. “So glad to meet you.” He bowed to both adults.
“Hi,” John said. Darcy sighed in discomfort.
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Later on, Kenzo walked home with a small bag of groceries in his hand.
“Good evening,” he greeted his next-door neighbor. The woman rolled her eyes and went into her apartment. He sighed and went into his apartment. Kenzo washed his clothes in the bathtub and went to sleep.
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In the morning, Kenzo awoke to someone ringing his doorbell. When he opened the door, he was greeted with a punch to the face. Kenzo lay on the floor, groaning.
“Shouldn't sneak up on me, should he?” Kon asked, leaning over the Korean boy. “Hmm? No? Yeah?”
“Yeah,” one of his thugs said.
“Yeah. No,” the other one said.
“Yeah?”
“No, Ryo.”
“Should he?”
“Bring the fucker,” Kon said. The thugs went inside and picked up Kenzo.
“Right, up you get, my lover,” the second thug said. Kon looked around confused as his thugs were carrying him down the outside.
“In here!” he shouted. “Bring him in the flat, you idiots.”
“Oh, right,” the second thug said. “Sorry, man, Kon. Got the wrong end of the stick.”
“Yeah, he wants to torture him inside, doesn’t he?” the first one asked.
“Inside, like.”
“Yeah, inside.”
“Put the kettle on please, guys,” Kon said. The thugs held Kenzo as they waited for the kettle to heat.
“It's taking a long time there, boss,” the first thug asked.
“Yeah,” Kon said.
“I keep saying, like. Probably shouldn't watch it,” the other thug said. “You know?”
“Right. Let’s get started, shall we?” Kon said. “Hello. Who's you?”
“K-K... Kenzo,” Kenzo said.
“K-K... Kenzo?” Kun asked. “You're in my apartment.”
“I thought it was empty. No-one wants to live here.”
“That's true. I wouldn't live here. I'd have to be a dirty asshole. Right?”
“Yeah. You'd be a right dirty asshole,” one of the thugs said.
“You wouldn't be a dirty arsehole.,” the second thug said. Kon held up his hand.
“Passport,” he said. One of his thugs reached into his pocket for his.
“Not you, Kuu!” he said. “You.” Kenzo reached into his pocket and pulled out his passport. Kon flipped through it quickly. The young Korean man looked nervous at the fake image.
“Fair enough,” Kon said. “Business or pleasure?”
“Sorry?” Kenzo asked.
“Are you here for business or pleasure?”
Kenzo glanced behind Kon and noticed the thugs mouthing, “business”, at him. “Business.”
“Correct answer!” Kon said. It was at that point, the kettle started to bubble.
“Kettle's boiled, Kon,” the thug said.
“Now we're ready, Kenzo,” Kon said. “Shu. Load a Pot.”
“Coming up, Kon,” the thug said. He pulled out his special spices as the other thug pushed Kenzo outside.
“This whole estate is mine,” Kon said on the balcony. “People like you, Thomas, you gotta pay to use it, see?”
“You wanna watch that there, Kon,” the other thug said. “That's fucking hot, man.”
“You sauced it?” Kon asked.
“Shit, yeah. It's fully charged.”
“I want you to see what kind of man you're dealing with, Kenzo,” Kon said. He took the cup and drank up.
“That is... Pure evil!” the first thug said. When he was done, Kon threw the cup over the edge. Kenzo peeked over.
“I want 3,000¥ deposit by Desperate Housewives on Thursday,” Kon said. “And don't bother trying to move apartment, ‘cause they're all mine. And that'll be 4,000¥ by X Factor Japan. We wouldn't want that, would we?”
“No,” Kenzo said.
“No,” Kon said. “Say goodnight to Kenzo, boys.” The boss turned and walked off.
“See ya, cocker,” the second thug said.
“Cheers, Kenzi. All the best,” the first one said.
“Be lucky.”
“He seemed like a nice lad to me.”
“Yeah, but Kon's gonna fuck him.”
“Oh, yeah. He is.”
Kenzo sighed once he was alone.
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“Dear Mama, little brother and sister,” Kenzo recorded himself saying. “I may be a long way from home, but you are so close to my thoughts. I am sending you this message because you must practice your Japanese before you come. Here, the sun shines just like at home and there are many wonderful people.” Then, he switched to Korean.
“(Sleep well brother and sister. Here is your song.)” Kenzo pulled out a small thumb piano and began singing an old Korean lullaby.
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The next day began the job hunt at the trash collection place. Kenzo stood in line, looking around. When a truck pulled up, he tried to climb on with the workers. One man stopped him in his tracks.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I need work,” Kenzo said.
“Fuck off, mister,” the man said. “This isn't your work.” Kenzo tried to get on the truck again, but was pushed away.
“Boy, they will beat you. You want them to beat you?” the worker said.
“No. But I must have money,” Kenzo said. The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a card for Tokyo Cram College.
“They take anyone,” he said.
“Oi!” another man yelled.
“No documents. You forgot them, OK?” the first man told Kenzo.
“Okay,” Kenzo said.
“Now fuck off. Before we beat you, huh?”
“Thank you, Sir.”
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The lady at the office looked over a job file as Kenzo sat before her. He tried to warm himself up as she wrote and stamp on the papers.
“This is a very cold country,” Kenzo said.
“Did you bring your visa and work permit?” the woman asked.
“I'm very sorry. I forgot them.”
“Special skills?”
“I play all music. I run very, very fast. Like a dog. Also, I am mathematical. I will solve any equation.”
“None. Qualifications?”
“Top of my class at school. All A's. The village was very proud.”
“Where?”
Kenzo frowned. “In South Korea.”
“None. Work experience?”
“Every day I fetch the goats. I milk them and...”
The woman at the desk gave him an odd look “Goats?”
In my village, before sunrise. I milk the goats; I collect the dung since I was four years old,” Kenzo said.
“None.”
He frowned as the woman made more notes. “This job will get me 3,000¥, yes? My mother is coming you see and she's a very fussy lady.”
“Yeah.” The woman stapled more papers tomorrow. “And you can start tomorrow.”
Kenzo felt like flying away. “What must I do?” He ended up cleaning the floors with a powered mop. He smiled at the powered beast.
“Excellent machine,” Kenzo said. Then the bell rang. The students walked in like a flood. He happened to notice Darcy in the crowd.
“Darcy! Darcy! Darcy!” someone shouted at her. She peeked behind to see Misa hurrying over to her.
“Excuse me!” she said. The diva finally caught up to her. “Darcy, hi! Look. I got a new top. It's cool, isn't it? When you've got tits like mine, you've gotta flash them haven't you?”
“Sorry?” Darcy asked.
“Breasts, girl. You should try it.”
“I never try.”
Misa looked so confused. “Huh?” She turned and noticed her sisters. “Stop fucking following me, will you!”
“I wasn't. I was...” Yumi said. She turned to walk away.
“A strange place, this college,” Kenzo said. Yumi paused and looked up.
“Sorry?” she asked.
“Everyone is loud and they care about nothing,” he said.
“Yeah. You're right.” Yumi began to walk away.
“You are the same as your sister,” Kenzo said. She turned, glaring.
“I'm not the same as her!” she said.
“No?” he asked. “Maybe you're a little more pretty.” Yumi kind of smiled.
“Cheeky,” she said. Kenzo smiled as she walked away.
“Most satisfactory,” he said. The young man turned and noticed a sea of mess in the hallway that he just cleaned. He dropped his shoulders and sighed. Kenzo was getting back to work when he heard some traditional Korean music from a classroom.
“Come on. Pick your positions, everyone!” a teacher shouted. “Now, feel the rhythm!” Kenzo followed the sound and peeked into the gym. Inside was a Korean set-up. The musicians and dancers were dressed up in traditional Korean wear. Kenzo took a seat and listened.
“Lilith! Take this seriously!” the teacher yelled. “That's right. Now swaying. Growl. You're Korean. Come on! OK. You're stalking, wind spirits. Come on, Shusuke. You're camouflaged. Get some bush!” The music got intense as the dancers got into the show.
“And stalking. Stalking your prey! And it's building, building. Teojushin! Great! Great, villagers. Feel the sun beating down on your haunches. Stretch, stretch. And cue crows! Circling, circling... And pounce! And finish! Finish, Lilith!” The dancers broke into their final pose.
“Bring us new life! Bring us new life!” the dancers sang. Kenzo smiled at the production. The teacher looked at Yusuke.
“What do you think?” she asked.
“Well... That's just smashing, Yoko,” Yusuke said. “Well done, everyone! I can absolutely smell the village. This is going to blow the Ofsted inspectors away.” The school rang and the dancers ran off to class.
“Right! Okay, everyone. Thank you!” Yusuke said. “Thank you all. A triumph!” He turned to the dance teacher.
“They've got a real sense of rhythm, haven't they?” he said. “Thrilling. In fact, er... I was wondering, well have you seen Out of Africa?”
“No,” the teacher said.
“I have it on DVD,” Yusuke said. “Similar themes. Maybe I could come over sometime and wang my disc in your box?”
“Oh, yeah! Possibly,” she said. Once they walked out of the gym, Kenzo walked over to the instruments.
“Hello friend,” he said, picking up a haegeum. He tuned it up and started to play with the bow. The song took him back to his younger days in the old village. It was then Lilith wandered in and picked up her scarf. She found herself drawn into the music. Kenzo stopped playing when happened to look up.
“Hi., I forgot my scarf,” Lilith said.
“Oh,” Kenzo said.
“Blooming heck, you’re good with a bow,” she said. “You can play super quick. That's gotta be handy.” She paused when she saw tears running down his cheeks. “Kenzo? Why are you crying?”
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“Wow! Japan is beautiful,” Kenzo said. “Everything is green.” He and Lilith walked through the school garden.
“Wicked green, ’cause it pisses down most days,” Lilith said. “Anyway, Darcy told me you carried me back, stripped me naked, and laid me tenderly in your bed.”
“Excuse me? I didn't... What?”
“You must be wondrously strong to carry me.”
“I've carried heavier goats.”
“You're funny!”
“Am I?”
“Yeah. And you like all the same things as me. Dancing, mochi...” She stopped when she heard someone’s stomach growling. Kenzo chuckled.
“Excuse me,” he said. “I'm a little hungry.” Lilith smiled.
“That's why we're going to see Auntie Megan. She makes ripper scones,” she asked.
“Scones?” Kenzo asked.
“Yup. And the best tea ever,” Lilith said. They walked up to a nice-looking house in a small neighborhood.
“My God! How many people live here?” Kenzi asked as Lilith rang the doorbell.
“One,” Lilith said. “But Auntie Meg has a wicked load of stuff.”
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“Now then, we're ready to hear all about you,” Aunt Megan said, serving them tea.
“Thanks, Megipoo,” Lilith said. Megan poured them all tea.
“Well, my family is from Icheon in South Korea,” Kenzo said. “Our village is very poor. I miss them so much. My mother will come next week with my brother and sister, and we'll live here, together.” Lilith handed him a cup.
“Oh, how very exciting!” Meg said. “You must bring them round. Do have a scone.”
“Thank you,” Kenzo said. He reached for one on the tray.
“Oh, no!” Lilith said. “Tea first. Scones always taste better after tea. Auntie grows it herself.” Both ladies took their drink of tea.
“Mmm,” Meg said.
“Mmm,” Lilith said. Kenzo looked at the thick green liquid in his cup. The smell told him that this wasn’t tea they were drinking.
“Mmm,” Meg said after a second drink.
“Makes my lips tingle and everything,” her niece said. The clock chimed in the background.
“That's wonderful,” Meg said. “Mmm! Heaven.”
“Oooh!” Lilith said. Kenzo lowered his cup.
“It's interesting,” he said. “I'd be very pleased to see how it is grown.” Meg set down her cup.
“Of course, my dear boy,” she said. “Yes. Just as soon as we've all got well and truly sconed.” Aunt and niece each picked up a scone and giggled.
---------
“So I had this lodger, Sean,” Meg said as she led the guests to her greenhouse in the backyard. “He's a charming chap from Kingston, Jamaica. Most entertaining. Anyway, he needed somewhere to keep his tea plants.” She tapped Lilith on the chin.
“Pay attention, dear,” Meg said. “So, Sean, it was an awful business, poor chap. He fell out with his brothers and they were so cross he had to go back to Jamaica rather quickly.” She unlocked the glass door and slid it open.
“Blimey,” the old lady said. “They don't half grow.” It didn’t take Kenzo long to realize that this greenhouse was really growing pot. Meg walked over to a glass table.
“So, this is where we dry it out,” she said. “It's terribly easy. But, flipping 'eck, it's coming out of my ears. It's lucky that it goes so well with cake!” She licked the tip of her finger.
“Maybe I could sell some,” Kenzo offered. “I think people would like it very much.”
“What an enterprising chap!” Meg said with a cat-like smile on her face. “You know, you could do worse, Lily. You could do a lot worse!” She tossed Kenzo a bag of pot. “You get me, blood?”
Kenzo got right to work putting the pot into small baggies.
“You don't have much furniture in here, do you, Kenzo?” Lilith asked.
“I must buy some before my mother comes,” Kenzo said. “She is a powerful lady, most powerful. Especially on the backhand.”
“Kenzo, you're gonna have to sell a shoe-load of tea to buy a sofa, even if it's a once in a lifetime, rock bottom offer at World of Leather. There's hardly enough for three or four cups in those bags.”
Kenzo looked up. “Lilith, this isn't just what you think it is.”
“Well, what in the bollocking name of buggery is it?” she asked. Kenzo picked up a joint and lit up. After taking a smoke, he handed it to the naïve girl. Her eyes saw stars after she took a smoke.
“That's smoking a lot better than Mum's Earl Grey!” she said.
“Yes,” Kenzo said. “And rather more expensive.” She turned his face to hers.
“You're amazing,” she said. Lilith leaned forward and kissed him. Kenzo rushed forward and gave her a longer kiss. Lilith stared at him with big eyes.
“Wow,” Lilith said. “Now I get it. Cripes. That was kissing.”
“No, Lilith,” Kenzo said. “This is kissing.” He took her into his arms and dipped her into another kiss.
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Meanwhile, Darcy sat at her dinner table while her dad ran his mouth at the table. Katie looked at her plate sheepishly.
“So Mick tells John exactly how it is,” William said. “Doesn't pull his punches. He said, ‘Let's take this outside, you tosser!’ Just like that! Fucking hell, John. That's the Managing Director, for fuck's sake! Great guy. Stupid, but great. You liked him, didn't you love?”
“Yeah, you know, he's okay,” Katie said. “Anyway, look, a funny thing happened to me in the supermarket today...”
“Me and John have a lot in common. We share the same tastes. He was surprisingly complimentary about you, love.”
“Right.” Suddenly, the doorbell rang.
“That'll be him now,” William said, putting his napkin on the table. Katie lowered her fork, stunned.
“What?” she asked.
“I invited Steve over for a drink. I made a friend!” William walked over to the door. “Fucking coming!”
“It's more complicated than you think,” Katie whispered to Darcy.
“It doesn't seem complicated,” her daughter said, frowning. “You're fucking my dad's line manager. No biggie.”
“Give me a chance to sort it out,” her mother pleaded. “Please, Darcy...”
“Well, it's not John,” William said, returning to the table with Lilith and Kenzo. “But look who it is! What's your name again?”
“Lilith,” Lilith said.
“Ridiculous,” William muttered under his breath as he took his seat.
“Hi, Darcy,” Lilith said. “Hi, Katie. Hi, Bill. This is Kenzo. Guess what? We've been snogging!”
“Never,” Darcy said.
“Yeah!” Lilith said. “And we need some advice.” Katie tried to hide her face.
“Oh?” her friend asked.
“Yeah.” Lilith reached into the plastic bag. “We've got a shitload of weed.” The last part was whispered.
“Right. Let's take this upstairs, shall we?” Darcy said. She rose to her feet.
“Darc, I've been doing it with tongues,” Lilith said. “Come on, Kenzo.”
“So glad to meet you again,” Kenzo said to Katie. “You look different with your clothes on.”
“What?” William asked.
“I just defrosted a nice tart tatin,” Katie said. She leapt out of her chair and walked over to the stove.
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Outside, James stood smoking. He spotted Alex and BJ walking towards him.
“You pussies turned up, then?” James asked.
“Hey. What's up?” Alex asked.
“My cock, hopefully,” James said. “You know what I mean?”
“I'm still upset,” BJ said. “I'm never going to a brothel with you again.”
“Ah! You loved it.” He swung at BJ hip as the girls arrived by car. “Hey-oop. We got action.”
“Yeah. They all hate you, Jim” BJ said.
“Why?” James asked.
“‘Cause you're a tit,” Alex said.
“How many times have I gotta tell you retards? Tit works.” He turned his attention to the girls. “Girls! We were just discussing breasts and there you were.”
“Asshole,” Misa said.
“Hi, Darcy,” Alex said.
“This is the guy you're gonna help out tonight,” Darcy said, motioning her head over at Kenzo.
“So glad,” Kenzo said, bowing.
“Kenzo has gotta get 300 quid by tomorrow, by Desperate Housewives,” she said. “Otherwise Kon's gonna make him eat...”
“Kon?!” Alex asked.
“He's got thirteen ounces of weed in the bag,” Darcy said.
“Okay,” Alex said.
“If you'd help, I could give you much,” Kenzo said. “It's excellent weed.”
“Hi,” Christine said, walking over to the group.
“Oh, Christ. Not again,” Misa complained. “Who phoned her?”
“Please, Misa. Don't,” Yumi pleaded.
“Hi, sorry,” Christine said. “I couldn't find a bus. You said somebody needed a hand?”
“You like giving hand. Don't you?” Misa asked. She and James broke into snickering.
“See you,” Christine said. She turned and walked away.
“For fuck's sake!” Yumi said. “She didn't kiss me, okay?”
“Yes she did!” Misa said. “She practically jumped you.”
“I kissed her!” Yumi confessed. “I was drunk, and someone gave me MDMA, and... I felt like fucking kissing someone! Satisfied?” At this point, Christine returned to the group. James broke into laughter.
“I'm satisfied!” he said. “Be better if you showed us!”
“Shut the fuck up, James,” Darcy said. “You promised me a party. Where is it?”
“Can't you feel it, kids?” he asked. The group looked so confused.
“It's the sound of the underground!” James said. He moved a manhole cover. The group lit up, overjoyed as they saw the light and heard the music.
“Come on, you suckers,” James said. “Let's go.” He climbed in first.
“Cool,” Darcy said.
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The party was packed and pumping underground. Everyone danced to the pounding club music. Once the gang got underground, they reached into the bag and got out the weed. They got right to work.
“Woo-hoo!” they said “Come on!” They sure made their rounds selling weed to the partiers tonight. However, Kon and his boys were there too.
“No fucking beat to this tune,” Kon complained.
“Oh, no. It's there, boss,” one of the thugs said. “You just gotta be pilled up.”
“You're supposed to be selling not necking, Shu!” Kon yelled. “You look like a fucking nonce, you idiot!” However, something else crowd his eye in the crowd. He spotted Kenzo and the girls selling weed.
“Hang on!” Kon said. “He's pushing dope at my fucking shindig! Go! Go, motherfuckers!” Sadly, his thugs went in the opposite direction.
“No! Him! Jesus!” Kon shouted. The man finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Wait till I get my hands on that little fucker. Out of my way! Fucking hell. Ooh! Fucking assholes.” Kon ended up hit in the face, knocked down, and trampled on.
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Christine stood outside the underground club, pacing around. Yumi found her outside.
“How much you sold?” she asked. “I have done three bags. Ten each.” Christine turned to her.
“Don't even know why I'm fucking doing this,” she said.
Yumi looked down at her feet. “Thanks for keeping schtum.” At that moment, Darcy walked into the doorway.
“I don't care what your sister thinks,” Christine said.
“Yeah, well, I do,” Yumi said. “So thanks anyway.” She pressed her lips together. “I didn't take MDMA that night. I just wanted to kiss you. I want to kiss you now.”
Christine gave her a shocked look. “You're gay?”
“No... No, I just... Sorry.”
“Yeah, me too.” Christine walked away. Yumi lightly stomped her foot.
“Shit,” she cursed herself. “Shit!” Yumi turned and saw Darcy eyeing her.
“Which are you?” Kenzo asked, jogging over to Yumi.
“Gay... I mean, Yumi,” the shy twin said.
“Yumi. Already I have 1,750¥,” Kenzo said. “My weed is cheap and, my god, they love it!”
“I got 80,” Darcy said.
“Oh, this country is so great!” Kenzo said. But then, someone grabbed him by the shoulder and turned him around.
“Oh! K-K-Kenzo!” Kon said. “You're on my t-t-turf! It's hitting profits, so you gotta pay. And we only accept cash and pain.” Kenzo took off running.
“Get the little fucker! Fucking smash him!” Kon shouted. He and his thug gave chase. Kenzo ran through the dancing crowd until he spotted two Korean guys near an exit.
“My brother!” he shouted. “Japanese people are gonna to season me!”
“What the fuck, blood?” the Korean guy asked. He turned to his friend. “Quick, gimme your T.”
“Make some noise, people!” the DJ shouted.
“Gimme the T-shirt! Quick!” the Korean man said. His friend took off his shirt and slid it onto Kenzo’s head and put a hat on his head.
“Come on stage, you can blend in the posse. Up here!” the Korean man said as he rushed him onto the stage.
“Let's get this started,” the DJ said. “Yeah, let me hear you make some noise for Ta!” The Korean guys began to rap on stage while Kenzo bounced along with the music. One of them handed him the mic and Kenzo began rapping in Korean. Lilith blew him a kiss in the crowd.
“Let me hear you make some noise for my Kenzo brother, Ken!” the other Korean man shouted. Lilith was lifted up to blow a kiss and give him the thumbs-up.
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In the morning, the crew headed home.
“85, 95,” James said, counting the money. “That's it. 2,950¥. There you go, fella. Should be plenty.” Kenzo looked shook as James handed him the money.
“Look after that, yeah?” Christine asked.
“Well done, Kenzo,” BJ said.
“This is... You are good people,” Kenzo said. “This is everything I have dreamed of and... Now you are my friends, too.” Suddenly, two vans came screech up around the gang.
“Oh, shit,” James said as Kon and his goons got out.
“Oh, God!” BJ said.
“Morning, fella,” Kon said. “Now we're really gonna fellate you.” He turned and noticed a nervous James in the crowd.
“Gentlemen,” he said. “Didn't I say I'd kill you if I ever saw you again?” Kon snatched his old chain from James’ neck. “Believe this is mine.” Kon beat the bat in his hand. “I love my work. Love it.”
“You must be some kind of Japanese pussy cunt?” Kenzo spoke up. Kon and his boys turned to face the Korean man.
“You heard me,” Kenzo said. “I think you're afraid. Possibly your father was a homosexual donkey. I will fight you by myself. You can choose any weapon.”
“You just made my day,” Kon said.
----------
The crew stood in Kon’s kitchen. The boss and Kenzo sat at a table.
“So, in summary, I win,” Kon said. You are my gimp forever, I take all your money, beat you, and your friends to a pulp, and my boys rape all the women.” Lilith panicked.
“Um, boss, the lads... The guys aren't too keen, you know, on the rape,” the thug said.
“For fuck's sake!” Kon shouted. “I'm talking dangerous! Can nobody talk dangerous anymore? Jesus! Fucking Tokyo. No ambition. No... edge, no style. You know? Provincial.”
“Sorry, boss,” the thug said.
“I'm ready,” Kenzo said. “How do you want to fight?”
“Promise you,” Kon said. “You're gonna shit yourself. Oh, yeah.” He snapped his fingers. The other thug brought in a small plate.
“You ever seen a Naga Jolokia before, Kenzo?” Kon asked, removing the cover. Hottest chili on the planet. It's like being fisted by Joe Calzaghe. And Joe's still got his gloves on.” He picked up a pepper. “Who flinches... is fucked.” He ate the first one and shoved over the plate.
“You,” Kon said. Kenzo picked up a handful
“Oh, in God's name, no,” the thug said. Kenzo ate up.
“My God!” Lilith said. Her crush smiled as he chewed up.
“Mmm,” he said. “Delicious.”
“Well done, mate,” James said.
“Well done, Kenzo,” Darcy said.
“What?” Kon asked.
“My mother, she grows these in our garden,” Kenzo said. “We are forbidden to eat them; she will beat us if we disobey. But boys will be boys. And I am a very naughty boy.” His friends giggled.
“If I win, I pay you no money, and you leave me and my friends alone forever,” Kenzo said. He shoved the plate forward. “You.” Kon fists trembled as he picked up a handful of peppers and shoved them in his mouth. Bad idea as he began to break down.
“Oh, my God,” Misa muttered.
“What is that?” the thug asked. The kids began laughing.
“He shat himself,” the other thug said.
“Oh. Oh, my God. That... That is so humiliating.”
“Oh, no.”
“Right, come on, lads. Let's get out of here.”
“Man, that is humming.”
“You can't respect a man, who shits himself, can you?” The thugs walked out of the kitchen.
“Mama,” Kon whimpered.
--------
Later, the kids partied and laughed at Kenzo’s apartment. Kenzo himself ate his mochi. He got a text from Lilith.
“Bed,” was what the message said. Kenzo walked back to the bedroom to see Lilith sitting on the bed in her underwear.
“Lilith, sweetness, what are you doing?” he asked.
“I've given it some thought, and I've decided,” she said. “You're gonna be the first, Kenzo.”
“The first?” He closed the door behind him.
“Yup. What do I want? Surfing and turfing. When do I want it? Now!”
Kenzo crawled on the bed and kissed Lilith on the lips. However, the doorbell rang. Kenzo went out and opened the front door.
“Mama!” he said in shock.
“(I’m waiting to kiss my boy!)” his mother said.
“Kenzo!” his little brother and sister said as they ran forward and hugged him.
“(Now let me see this apartment you found,)” their mother said.
“(But you were coming next week…)” Kenzo said. His mother tapped her cheek and he kissed it.
“Come on, BJ,” Yumi said.
“(It’s too long for a boy to be on his own and not knowing what he’s getting up to,)” his mother said. Misa walked through the living room with a cigarette and liquor in her hands in her underwear.
“Hi,” Misa said. To his mother’s horror, she saw the teenage debauchery of all of his new friends.
“You gonna come and flippin' well jump me now?” Lilith asked, now topless. “I took my bra off and everything! Look! Aren't they fucking amazing?” She flashed her breasts before she saw his mom.
“(Mama...)” Kenzo said. “(I can explain!)”
“(Pack your bags!)” his mother shouted.
“(Mama…)”
“(Pack your bags! You’re going home, boy!)” She and the kids walked into the apartment. “(You’re all disgusting!)”
Needless to say, Kenzo ended up going back to South Korea and Lilith cried on Aunt Megan’s lap at her house.
On a new-looking apartment complex on the other side of Tokyo, a Korean youth set a picture of his family on a dusty shelf and hit play on his tape recorder.
“Hello, I’m Thomas,” he said in a dusty mirror. “So glad to meet you.” The youth admired the bright, clear day from the window and began to dance to the hip-hop filling the empty room. Kenzo arrived alone in Japan last night. He had to find a new home for his family. Around midnight, he found this apartment. After unpacking and cleaning up the place and himself, everything began to settle in. Kenzo stepped outside and took in a breath of the Japanese air. Next door, a woman and her son stepped outside. Kenzo looked up at the moment the boy of six years old walked over.
“Hello, I’m Kenzo,” he said, bowing. “So glad to meet you.”
“Hello,” the child said.
“Misao! Come here! Come here!” his mother shouted. “Don’t talk to him for fuck’s sake!” Kenzo sighed as the woman walked away ranting. Minutes later, he made phone call on a payphone outside the apartment.
“(Hello? Hi, mama. Everything is great. Everything is great. Yes, I found an apartment. Oh, it’s cool, super cool. Wait until you see it. Every luxury. Incredible! A job…?)” Kenzo looked outside of the phone booth. He spotted a trash man picking up garbage from the can outside. “(I’m a trash man. Yes, a trash man. It’s so easy. They have these machines that…)” Then the phone got disconnected.
“(Hello?)” Kenzo asked. “(Mama? Mama?)” He hung up and pulled out the calling card.
“(Shit,)” he muttered.
--------
“I bought this card for 120 minutes. I speak for two minutes. Nothing left,” Kenzo complained at the convenience store down the street.
“You want to buy another card?” the tired-eyed clerk asked.
“No, no, no, no,” Kenzo said. “My mother, she’ll be very upset.”
“It’s fifty yen,” the clerk said. Kenzo dug in his pockets and only came up with ten yen.
“Fifty yen,” the clerk repeated. He happened to look up and notice two boys stuffing candy down their shirts.
“Oi! Oi, what you doing?” he shouted. “Come here. I told you kids what I'd do last time!” The clerk ran over and tackled the kids.
“Fucking kick him, Yu!” one of the boys yelled. His friend tried to and the struggle ensured as Kenzo looked on.
“Kick him harder!” the brat shouted. “Gaigin cunt!” Kenzo grabbed the boy by the arm.
“Cunt is a very bad word,” he said. “Even in Japan, I think. Yes?” The boy nodded with a blank stare. Kenzo turned to the clerk.
“What is this ‘gaigin’ that they call you?” he asked. “Is that bad?”
“I'm from Okinawa and I hate Gaigin,” the clerk said. Kenzo turned back to the kid.
“So, you see? Disrespectful,” he said. “Now, go and play. Go!” The two boys took off running out of the store. Kenzo handed the clerk’s bat back, smiling.
----------
Kenzo sat at the bus station with his new bag full of mochi balls. He began chewing down.
“Mmmm,” he said. “Oh! Mmmm. Ah!” On the other side, Darcy, Nadine, and Lilith sat waiting for the bus.
“Wow! You've got a wacker lot of mochi,” Lilith said. Kenzo put down the mochi.
“Yes,” he said. “Of course, I have too many.” He handed her the bag.
“Crazy. Ta,” Lilith said. She chewed down as Kenzo offered the mochi to Darcy and Nadine.
“No, thanks,” Darcy said. Nadine waved him off.
“They don't do mochi,” Lilith said with a full mouth.
“I see,” Kenzo said. “So, what does she do?”
“Drugs,” Lilith said. “We've just been to buy some skunky, haven't we, girls?” She picked up a blunt and took a smoke. She reached into the bag for another mochi ball.
“I can do six of these no problem, except Mum hides them behind the fridge-freezer,” Lilith said. “Wow! This is blimmin' amazing! But I need juicing.”
“You need juicing?” Nadine asked.
“Yeah. Chuck us the Orange-apple, would you, Dine?” Lilith asked. Nadine handed her the open bottle. She took a drink and held up the bottle.
“Barry!” Lilith said.
“What are you talking about?” Darcy asked.
“Uncle Jock always says ‘Barry’ when he drinks Orange-apple,” Lilith said. “I don't know why, Mum says it's because he's Scottish and mad.”
“Hello. My name is Kenzo,” he said, bowing. “I'm so glad to meet you.”
“Darcy,” Darcy said. “So glad to meet you.”
“I came yesterday, from South Korea,” Kenzo said. “This place is exceedingly cold.” He rubbed his hands together, breathing on them.
“Bummer,” Nadine said. Suddenly, Lilith froze.
“Oh. Hell's bells,” she said. She began throwing up on the street. Darcy and Nadine turned away.
--------
Kenzo had to carry Lilith over his shoulder as he followed Nadine and Darcy back to Darcy’s house. The latter unlocked the door and let her friends inside.
“This way,” Darcy said, heading down the hall. Kenzo looked around like a child seeing something shiny for the first time.
“Incroyable,” he said.
“Sorry?” Darcy asked.
“Your house, it’s incredible.”
“Thanks.” Darcy went up the stairs. “Come on. Bring the dozy cow up here.” Kenzo followed her up the stairs and sat Lilith down in a chair. She began to throw up a little more.
“I think maybe these doughnuts are not good for you,” Kenzo said. Lilith started snoring.
“Yeah, that must be it,” Darcy said. She paused when she heard giggling and moaning. “Mum? Mum?” She began walking to her mother’s bedroom door.
“Shit! Where's my...?” a man asked. “Oh, for fuck's sake. Jesus Christ!”
“Put your trousers on,” Katie said. Darcy opened the door to find a man getting dressed and her mother wrapped up in bed sheets.
“Darcy, what are you, er, doing here?” Katie asked.
“Lilith puked,” her daughter said.
“Uh… Uh… You know John, don't you?” Katie asked.
“Hi,” John said, putting on his glasses.
“He's been helping me with my, erm, my project.”
“Right, yeah. It's really interesting, isn't it?” John buttoned up his shirt.
“Yeah.”
“Hello. My name is Kenzo,” Kenzo said as he walked into the room. “So glad to meet you.” He bowed to both adults.
“Hi,” John said. Darcy sighed in discomfort.
--------
Later on, Kenzo walked home with a small bag of groceries in his hand.
“Good evening,” he greeted his next-door neighbor. The woman rolled her eyes and went into her apartment. He sighed and went into his apartment. Kenzo washed his clothes in the bathtub and went to sleep.
-------
In the morning, Kenzo awoke to someone ringing his doorbell. When he opened the door, he was greeted with a punch to the face. Kenzo lay on the floor, groaning.
“Shouldn't sneak up on me, should he?” Kon asked, leaning over the Korean boy. “Hmm? No? Yeah?”
“Yeah,” one of his thugs said.
“Yeah. No,” the other one said.
“Yeah?”
“No, Ryo.”
“Should he?”
“Bring the fucker,” Kon said. The thugs went inside and picked up Kenzo.
“Right, up you get, my lover,” the second thug said. Kon looked around confused as his thugs were carrying him down the outside.
“In here!” he shouted. “Bring him in the flat, you idiots.”
“Oh, right,” the second thug said. “Sorry, man, Kon. Got the wrong end of the stick.”
“Yeah, he wants to torture him inside, doesn’t he?” the first one asked.
“Inside, like.”
“Yeah, inside.”
“Put the kettle on please, guys,” Kon said. The thugs held Kenzo as they waited for the kettle to heat.
“It's taking a long time there, boss,” the first thug asked.
“Yeah,” Kon said.
“I keep saying, like. Probably shouldn't watch it,” the other thug said. “You know?”
“Right. Let’s get started, shall we?” Kon said. “Hello. Who's you?”
“K-K... Kenzo,” Kenzo said.
“K-K... Kenzo?” Kun asked. “You're in my apartment.”
“I thought it was empty. No-one wants to live here.”
“That's true. I wouldn't live here. I'd have to be a dirty asshole. Right?”
“Yeah. You'd be a right dirty asshole,” one of the thugs said.
“You wouldn't be a dirty arsehole.,” the second thug said. Kon held up his hand.
“Passport,” he said. One of his thugs reached into his pocket for his.
“Not you, Kuu!” he said. “You.” Kenzo reached into his pocket and pulled out his passport. Kon flipped through it quickly. The young Korean man looked nervous at the fake image.
“Fair enough,” Kon said. “Business or pleasure?”
“Sorry?” Kenzo asked.
“Are you here for business or pleasure?”
Kenzo glanced behind Kon and noticed the thugs mouthing, “business”, at him. “Business.”
“Correct answer!” Kon said. It was at that point, the kettle started to bubble.
“Kettle's boiled, Kon,” the thug said.
“Now we're ready, Kenzo,” Kon said. “Shu. Load a Pot.”
“Coming up, Kon,” the thug said. He pulled out his special spices as the other thug pushed Kenzo outside.
“This whole estate is mine,” Kon said on the balcony. “People like you, Thomas, you gotta pay to use it, see?”
“You wanna watch that there, Kon,” the other thug said. “That's fucking hot, man.”
“You sauced it?” Kon asked.
“Shit, yeah. It's fully charged.”
“I want you to see what kind of man you're dealing with, Kenzo,” Kon said. He took the cup and drank up.
“That is... Pure evil!” the first thug said. When he was done, Kon threw the cup over the edge. Kenzo peeked over.
“I want 3,000¥ deposit by Desperate Housewives on Thursday,” Kon said. “And don't bother trying to move apartment, ‘cause they're all mine. And that'll be 4,000¥ by X Factor Japan. We wouldn't want that, would we?”
“No,” Kenzo said.
“No,” Kon said. “Say goodnight to Kenzo, boys.” The boss turned and walked off.
“See ya, cocker,” the second thug said.
“Cheers, Kenzi. All the best,” the first one said.
“Be lucky.”
“He seemed like a nice lad to me.”
“Yeah, but Kon's gonna fuck him.”
“Oh, yeah. He is.”
Kenzo sighed once he was alone.
---------
“Dear Mama, little brother and sister,” Kenzo recorded himself saying. “I may be a long way from home, but you are so close to my thoughts. I am sending you this message because you must practice your Japanese before you come. Here, the sun shines just like at home and there are many wonderful people.” Then, he switched to Korean.
“(Sleep well brother and sister. Here is your song.)” Kenzo pulled out a small thumb piano and began singing an old Korean lullaby.
----------
The next day began the job hunt at the trash collection place. Kenzo stood in line, looking around. When a truck pulled up, he tried to climb on with the workers. One man stopped him in his tracks.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I need work,” Kenzo said.
“Fuck off, mister,” the man said. “This isn't your work.” Kenzo tried to get on the truck again, but was pushed away.
“Boy, they will beat you. You want them to beat you?” the worker said.
“No. But I must have money,” Kenzo said. The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a card for Tokyo Cram College.
“They take anyone,” he said.
“Oi!” another man yelled.
“No documents. You forgot them, OK?” the first man told Kenzo.
“Okay,” Kenzo said.
“Now fuck off. Before we beat you, huh?”
“Thank you, Sir.”
--------
The lady at the office looked over a job file as Kenzo sat before her. He tried to warm himself up as she wrote and stamp on the papers.
“This is a very cold country,” Kenzo said.
“Did you bring your visa and work permit?” the woman asked.
“I'm very sorry. I forgot them.”
“Special skills?”
“I play all music. I run very, very fast. Like a dog. Also, I am mathematical. I will solve any equation.”
“None. Qualifications?”
“Top of my class at school. All A's. The village was very proud.”
“Where?”
Kenzo frowned. “In South Korea.”
“None. Work experience?”
“Every day I fetch the goats. I milk them and...”
The woman at the desk gave him an odd look “Goats?”
In my village, before sunrise. I milk the goats; I collect the dung since I was four years old,” Kenzo said.
“None.”
He frowned as the woman made more notes. “This job will get me 3,000¥, yes? My mother is coming you see and she's a very fussy lady.”
“Yeah.” The woman stapled more papers tomorrow. “And you can start tomorrow.”
Kenzo felt like flying away. “What must I do?” He ended up cleaning the floors with a powered mop. He smiled at the powered beast.
“Excellent machine,” Kenzo said. Then the bell rang. The students walked in like a flood. He happened to notice Darcy in the crowd.
“Darcy! Darcy! Darcy!” someone shouted at her. She peeked behind to see Misa hurrying over to her.
“Excuse me!” she said. The diva finally caught up to her. “Darcy, hi! Look. I got a new top. It's cool, isn't it? When you've got tits like mine, you've gotta flash them haven't you?”
“Sorry?” Darcy asked.
“Breasts, girl. You should try it.”
“I never try.”
Misa looked so confused. “Huh?” She turned and noticed her sisters. “Stop fucking following me, will you!”
“I wasn't. I was...” Yumi said. She turned to walk away.
“A strange place, this college,” Kenzo said. Yumi paused and looked up.
“Sorry?” she asked.
“Everyone is loud and they care about nothing,” he said.
“Yeah. You're right.” Yumi began to walk away.
“You are the same as your sister,” Kenzo said. She turned, glaring.
“I'm not the same as her!” she said.
“No?” he asked. “Maybe you're a little more pretty.” Yumi kind of smiled.
“Cheeky,” she said. Kenzo smiled as she walked away.
“Most satisfactory,” he said. The young man turned and noticed a sea of mess in the hallway that he just cleaned. He dropped his shoulders and sighed. Kenzo was getting back to work when he heard some traditional Korean music from a classroom.
“Come on. Pick your positions, everyone!” a teacher shouted. “Now, feel the rhythm!” Kenzo followed the sound and peeked into the gym. Inside was a Korean set-up. The musicians and dancers were dressed up in traditional Korean wear. Kenzo took a seat and listened.
“Lilith! Take this seriously!” the teacher yelled. “That's right. Now swaying. Growl. You're Korean. Come on! OK. You're stalking, wind spirits. Come on, Shusuke. You're camouflaged. Get some bush!” The music got intense as the dancers got into the show.
“And stalking. Stalking your prey! And it's building, building. Teojushin! Great! Great, villagers. Feel the sun beating down on your haunches. Stretch, stretch. And cue crows! Circling, circling... And pounce! And finish! Finish, Lilith!” The dancers broke into their final pose.
“Bring us new life! Bring us new life!” the dancers sang. Kenzo smiled at the production. The teacher looked at Yusuke.
“What do you think?” she asked.
“Well... That's just smashing, Yoko,” Yusuke said. “Well done, everyone! I can absolutely smell the village. This is going to blow the Ofsted inspectors away.” The school rang and the dancers ran off to class.
“Right! Okay, everyone. Thank you!” Yusuke said. “Thank you all. A triumph!” He turned to the dance teacher.
“They've got a real sense of rhythm, haven't they?” he said. “Thrilling. In fact, er... I was wondering, well have you seen Out of Africa?”
“No,” the teacher said.
“I have it on DVD,” Yusuke said. “Similar themes. Maybe I could come over sometime and wang my disc in your box?”
“Oh, yeah! Possibly,” she said. Once they walked out of the gym, Kenzo walked over to the instruments.
“Hello friend,” he said, picking up a haegeum. He tuned it up and started to play with the bow. The song took him back to his younger days in the old village. It was then Lilith wandered in and picked up her scarf. She found herself drawn into the music. Kenzo stopped playing when happened to look up.
“Hi., I forgot my scarf,” Lilith said.
“Oh,” Kenzo said.
“Blooming heck, you’re good with a bow,” she said. “You can play super quick. That's gotta be handy.” She paused when she saw tears running down his cheeks. “Kenzo? Why are you crying?”
-----------
“Wow! Japan is beautiful,” Kenzo said. “Everything is green.” He and Lilith walked through the school garden.
“Wicked green, ’cause it pisses down most days,” Lilith said. “Anyway, Darcy told me you carried me back, stripped me naked, and laid me tenderly in your bed.”
“Excuse me? I didn't... What?”
“You must be wondrously strong to carry me.”
“I've carried heavier goats.”
“You're funny!”
“Am I?”
“Yeah. And you like all the same things as me. Dancing, mochi...” She stopped when she heard someone’s stomach growling. Kenzo chuckled.
“Excuse me,” he said. “I'm a little hungry.” Lilith smiled.
“That's why we're going to see Auntie Megan. She makes ripper scones,” she asked.
“Scones?” Kenzo asked.
“Yup. And the best tea ever,” Lilith said. They walked up to a nice-looking house in a small neighborhood.
“My God! How many people live here?” Kenzi asked as Lilith rang the doorbell.
“One,” Lilith said. “But Auntie Meg has a wicked load of stuff.”
---------
“Now then, we're ready to hear all about you,” Aunt Megan said, serving them tea.
“Thanks, Megipoo,” Lilith said. Megan poured them all tea.
“Well, my family is from Icheon in South Korea,” Kenzo said. “Our village is very poor. I miss them so much. My mother will come next week with my brother and sister, and we'll live here, together.” Lilith handed him a cup.
“Oh, how very exciting!” Meg said. “You must bring them round. Do have a scone.”
“Thank you,” Kenzo said. He reached for one on the tray.
“Oh, no!” Lilith said. “Tea first. Scones always taste better after tea. Auntie grows it herself.” Both ladies took their drink of tea.
“Mmm,” Meg said.
“Mmm,” Lilith said. Kenzo looked at the thick green liquid in his cup. The smell told him that this wasn’t tea they were drinking.
“Mmm,” Meg said after a second drink.
“Makes my lips tingle and everything,” her niece said. The clock chimed in the background.
“That's wonderful,” Meg said. “Mmm! Heaven.”
“Oooh!” Lilith said. Kenzo lowered his cup.
“It's interesting,” he said. “I'd be very pleased to see how it is grown.” Meg set down her cup.
“Of course, my dear boy,” she said. “Yes. Just as soon as we've all got well and truly sconed.” Aunt and niece each picked up a scone and giggled.
---------
“So I had this lodger, Sean,” Meg said as she led the guests to her greenhouse in the backyard. “He's a charming chap from Kingston, Jamaica. Most entertaining. Anyway, he needed somewhere to keep his tea plants.” She tapped Lilith on the chin.
“Pay attention, dear,” Meg said. “So, Sean, it was an awful business, poor chap. He fell out with his brothers and they were so cross he had to go back to Jamaica rather quickly.” She unlocked the glass door and slid it open.
“Blimey,” the old lady said. “They don't half grow.” It didn’t take Kenzo long to realize that this greenhouse was really growing pot. Meg walked over to a glass table.
“So, this is where we dry it out,” she said. “It's terribly easy. But, flipping 'eck, it's coming out of my ears. It's lucky that it goes so well with cake!” She licked the tip of her finger.
“Maybe I could sell some,” Kenzo offered. “I think people would like it very much.”
“What an enterprising chap!” Meg said with a cat-like smile on her face. “You know, you could do worse, Lily. You could do a lot worse!” She tossed Kenzo a bag of pot. “You get me, blood?”
Kenzo got right to work putting the pot into small baggies.
“You don't have much furniture in here, do you, Kenzo?” Lilith asked.
“I must buy some before my mother comes,” Kenzo said. “She is a powerful lady, most powerful. Especially on the backhand.”
“Kenzo, you're gonna have to sell a shoe-load of tea to buy a sofa, even if it's a once in a lifetime, rock bottom offer at World of Leather. There's hardly enough for three or four cups in those bags.”
Kenzo looked up. “Lilith, this isn't just what you think it is.”
“Well, what in the bollocking name of buggery is it?” she asked. Kenzo picked up a joint and lit up. After taking a smoke, he handed it to the naïve girl. Her eyes saw stars after she took a smoke.
“That's smoking a lot better than Mum's Earl Grey!” she said.
“Yes,” Kenzo said. “And rather more expensive.” She turned his face to hers.
“You're amazing,” she said. Lilith leaned forward and kissed him. Kenzo rushed forward and gave her a longer kiss. Lilith stared at him with big eyes.
“Wow,” Lilith said. “Now I get it. Cripes. That was kissing.”
“No, Lilith,” Kenzo said. “This is kissing.” He took her into his arms and dipped her into another kiss.
--------
Meanwhile, Darcy sat at her dinner table while her dad ran his mouth at the table. Katie looked at her plate sheepishly.
“So Mick tells John exactly how it is,” William said. “Doesn't pull his punches. He said, ‘Let's take this outside, you tosser!’ Just like that! Fucking hell, John. That's the Managing Director, for fuck's sake! Great guy. Stupid, but great. You liked him, didn't you love?”
“Yeah, you know, he's okay,” Katie said. “Anyway, look, a funny thing happened to me in the supermarket today...”
“Me and John have a lot in common. We share the same tastes. He was surprisingly complimentary about you, love.”
“Right.” Suddenly, the doorbell rang.
“That'll be him now,” William said, putting his napkin on the table. Katie lowered her fork, stunned.
“What?” she asked.
“I invited Steve over for a drink. I made a friend!” William walked over to the door. “Fucking coming!”
“It's more complicated than you think,” Katie whispered to Darcy.
“It doesn't seem complicated,” her daughter said, frowning. “You're fucking my dad's line manager. No biggie.”
“Give me a chance to sort it out,” her mother pleaded. “Please, Darcy...”
“Well, it's not John,” William said, returning to the table with Lilith and Kenzo. “But look who it is! What's your name again?”
“Lilith,” Lilith said.
“Ridiculous,” William muttered under his breath as he took his seat.
“Hi, Darcy,” Lilith said. “Hi, Katie. Hi, Bill. This is Kenzo. Guess what? We've been snogging!”
“Never,” Darcy said.
“Yeah!” Lilith said. “And we need some advice.” Katie tried to hide her face.
“Oh?” her friend asked.
“Yeah.” Lilith reached into the plastic bag. “We've got a shitload of weed.” The last part was whispered.
“Right. Let's take this upstairs, shall we?” Darcy said. She rose to her feet.
“Darc, I've been doing it with tongues,” Lilith said. “Come on, Kenzo.”
“So glad to meet you again,” Kenzo said to Katie. “You look different with your clothes on.”
“What?” William asked.
“I just defrosted a nice tart tatin,” Katie said. She leapt out of her chair and walked over to the stove.
---------
Outside, James stood smoking. He spotted Alex and BJ walking towards him.
“You pussies turned up, then?” James asked.
“Hey. What's up?” Alex asked.
“My cock, hopefully,” James said. “You know what I mean?”
“I'm still upset,” BJ said. “I'm never going to a brothel with you again.”
“Ah! You loved it.” He swung at BJ hip as the girls arrived by car. “Hey-oop. We got action.”
“Yeah. They all hate you, Jim” BJ said.
“Why?” James asked.
“‘Cause you're a tit,” Alex said.
“How many times have I gotta tell you retards? Tit works.” He turned his attention to the girls. “Girls! We were just discussing breasts and there you were.”
“Asshole,” Misa said.
“Hi, Darcy,” Alex said.
“This is the guy you're gonna help out tonight,” Darcy said, motioning her head over at Kenzo.
“So glad,” Kenzo said, bowing.
“Kenzo has gotta get 300 quid by tomorrow, by Desperate Housewives,” she said. “Otherwise Kon's gonna make him eat...”
“Kon?!” Alex asked.
“He's got thirteen ounces of weed in the bag,” Darcy said.
“Okay,” Alex said.
“If you'd help, I could give you much,” Kenzo said. “It's excellent weed.”
“Hi,” Christine said, walking over to the group.
“Oh, Christ. Not again,” Misa complained. “Who phoned her?”
“Please, Misa. Don't,” Yumi pleaded.
“Hi, sorry,” Christine said. “I couldn't find a bus. You said somebody needed a hand?”
“You like giving hand. Don't you?” Misa asked. She and James broke into snickering.
“See you,” Christine said. She turned and walked away.
“For fuck's sake!” Yumi said. “She didn't kiss me, okay?”
“Yes she did!” Misa said. “She practically jumped you.”
“I kissed her!” Yumi confessed. “I was drunk, and someone gave me MDMA, and... I felt like fucking kissing someone! Satisfied?” At this point, Christine returned to the group. James broke into laughter.
“I'm satisfied!” he said. “Be better if you showed us!”
“Shut the fuck up, James,” Darcy said. “You promised me a party. Where is it?”
“Can't you feel it, kids?” he asked. The group looked so confused.
“It's the sound of the underground!” James said. He moved a manhole cover. The group lit up, overjoyed as they saw the light and heard the music.
“Come on, you suckers,” James said. “Let's go.” He climbed in first.
“Cool,” Darcy said.
--------
The party was packed and pumping underground. Everyone danced to the pounding club music. Once the gang got underground, they reached into the bag and got out the weed. They got right to work.
“Woo-hoo!” they said “Come on!” They sure made their rounds selling weed to the partiers tonight. However, Kon and his boys were there too.
“No fucking beat to this tune,” Kon complained.
“Oh, no. It's there, boss,” one of the thugs said. “You just gotta be pilled up.”
“You're supposed to be selling not necking, Shu!” Kon yelled. “You look like a fucking nonce, you idiot!” However, something else crowd his eye in the crowd. He spotted Kenzo and the girls selling weed.
“Hang on!” Kon said. “He's pushing dope at my fucking shindig! Go! Go, motherfuckers!” Sadly, his thugs went in the opposite direction.
“No! Him! Jesus!” Kon shouted. The man finally decided to take matters into his own hands. Wait till I get my hands on that little fucker. Out of my way! Fucking hell. Ooh! Fucking assholes.” Kon ended up hit in the face, knocked down, and trampled on.
--------
Christine stood outside the underground club, pacing around. Yumi found her outside.
“How much you sold?” she asked. “I have done three bags. Ten each.” Christine turned to her.
“Don't even know why I'm fucking doing this,” she said.
Yumi looked down at her feet. “Thanks for keeping schtum.” At that moment, Darcy walked into the doorway.
“I don't care what your sister thinks,” Christine said.
“Yeah, well, I do,” Yumi said. “So thanks anyway.” She pressed her lips together. “I didn't take MDMA that night. I just wanted to kiss you. I want to kiss you now.”
Christine gave her a shocked look. “You're gay?”
“No... No, I just... Sorry.”
“Yeah, me too.” Christine walked away. Yumi lightly stomped her foot.
“Shit,” she cursed herself. “Shit!” Yumi turned and saw Darcy eyeing her.
“Which are you?” Kenzo asked, jogging over to Yumi.
“Gay... I mean, Yumi,” the shy twin said.
“Yumi. Already I have 1,750¥,” Kenzo said. “My weed is cheap and, my god, they love it!”
“I got 80,” Darcy said.
“Oh, this country is so great!” Kenzo said. But then, someone grabbed him by the shoulder and turned him around.
“Oh! K-K-Kenzo!” Kon said. “You're on my t-t-turf! It's hitting profits, so you gotta pay. And we only accept cash and pain.” Kenzo took off running.
“Get the little fucker! Fucking smash him!” Kon shouted. He and his thug gave chase. Kenzo ran through the dancing crowd until he spotted two Korean guys near an exit.
“My brother!” he shouted. “Japanese people are gonna to season me!”
“What the fuck, blood?” the Korean guy asked. He turned to his friend. “Quick, gimme your T.”
“Make some noise, people!” the DJ shouted.
“Gimme the T-shirt! Quick!” the Korean man said. His friend took off his shirt and slid it onto Kenzo’s head and put a hat on his head.
“Come on stage, you can blend in the posse. Up here!” the Korean man said as he rushed him onto the stage.
“Let's get this started,” the DJ said. “Yeah, let me hear you make some noise for Ta!” The Korean guys began to rap on stage while Kenzo bounced along with the music. One of them handed him the mic and Kenzo began rapping in Korean. Lilith blew him a kiss in the crowd.
“Let me hear you make some noise for my Kenzo brother, Ken!” the other Korean man shouted. Lilith was lifted up to blow a kiss and give him the thumbs-up.
----------
In the morning, the crew headed home.
“85, 95,” James said, counting the money. “That's it. 2,950¥. There you go, fella. Should be plenty.” Kenzo looked shook as James handed him the money.
“Look after that, yeah?” Christine asked.
“Well done, Kenzo,” BJ said.
“This is... You are good people,” Kenzo said. “This is everything I have dreamed of and... Now you are my friends, too.” Suddenly, two vans came screech up around the gang.
“Oh, shit,” James said as Kon and his goons got out.
“Oh, God!” BJ said.
“Morning, fella,” Kon said. “Now we're really gonna fellate you.” He turned and noticed a nervous James in the crowd.
“Gentlemen,” he said. “Didn't I say I'd kill you if I ever saw you again?” Kon snatched his old chain from James’ neck. “Believe this is mine.” Kon beat the bat in his hand. “I love my work. Love it.”
“You must be some kind of Japanese pussy cunt?” Kenzo spoke up. Kon and his boys turned to face the Korean man.
“You heard me,” Kenzo said. “I think you're afraid. Possibly your father was a homosexual donkey. I will fight you by myself. You can choose any weapon.”
“You just made my day,” Kon said.
----------
The crew stood in Kon’s kitchen. The boss and Kenzo sat at a table.
“So, in summary, I win,” Kon said. You are my gimp forever, I take all your money, beat you, and your friends to a pulp, and my boys rape all the women.” Lilith panicked.
“Um, boss, the lads... The guys aren't too keen, you know, on the rape,” the thug said.
“For fuck's sake!” Kon shouted. “I'm talking dangerous! Can nobody talk dangerous anymore? Jesus! Fucking Tokyo. No ambition. No... edge, no style. You know? Provincial.”
“Sorry, boss,” the thug said.
“I'm ready,” Kenzo said. “How do you want to fight?”
“Promise you,” Kon said. “You're gonna shit yourself. Oh, yeah.” He snapped his fingers. The other thug brought in a small plate.
“You ever seen a Naga Jolokia before, Kenzo?” Kon asked, removing the cover. Hottest chili on the planet. It's like being fisted by Joe Calzaghe. And Joe's still got his gloves on.” He picked up a pepper. “Who flinches... is fucked.” He ate the first one and shoved over the plate.
“You,” Kon said. Kenzo picked up a handful
“Oh, in God's name, no,” the thug said. Kenzo ate up.
“My God!” Lilith said. Her crush smiled as he chewed up.
“Mmm,” he said. “Delicious.”
“Well done, mate,” James said.
“Well done, Kenzo,” Darcy said.
“What?” Kon asked.
“My mother, she grows these in our garden,” Kenzo said. “We are forbidden to eat them; she will beat us if we disobey. But boys will be boys. And I am a very naughty boy.” His friends giggled.
“If I win, I pay you no money, and you leave me and my friends alone forever,” Kenzo said. He shoved the plate forward. “You.” Kon fists trembled as he picked up a handful of peppers and shoved them in his mouth. Bad idea as he began to break down.
“Oh, my God,” Misa muttered.
“What is that?” the thug asked. The kids began laughing.
“He shat himself,” the other thug said.
“Oh. Oh, my God. That... That is so humiliating.”
“Oh, no.”
“Right, come on, lads. Let's get out of here.”
“Man, that is humming.”
“You can't respect a man, who shits himself, can you?” The thugs walked out of the kitchen.
“Mama,” Kon whimpered.
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Later, the kids partied and laughed at Kenzo’s apartment. Kenzo himself ate his mochi. He got a text from Lilith.
“Bed,” was what the message said. Kenzo walked back to the bedroom to see Lilith sitting on the bed in her underwear.
“Lilith, sweetness, what are you doing?” he asked.
“I've given it some thought, and I've decided,” she said. “You're gonna be the first, Kenzo.”
“The first?” He closed the door behind him.
“Yup. What do I want? Surfing and turfing. When do I want it? Now!”
Kenzo crawled on the bed and kissed Lilith on the lips. However, the doorbell rang. Kenzo went out and opened the front door.
“Mama!” he said in shock.
“(I’m waiting to kiss my boy!)” his mother said.
“Kenzo!” his little brother and sister said as they ran forward and hugged him.
“(Now let me see this apartment you found,)” their mother said.
“(But you were coming next week…)” Kenzo said. His mother tapped her cheek and he kissed it.
“Come on, BJ,” Yumi said.
“(It’s too long for a boy to be on his own and not knowing what he’s getting up to,)” his mother said. Misa walked through the living room with a cigarette and liquor in her hands in her underwear.
“Hi,” Misa said. To his mother’s horror, she saw the teenage debauchery of all of his new friends.
“You gonna come and flippin' well jump me now?” Lilith asked, now topless. “I took my bra off and everything! Look! Aren't they fucking amazing?” She flashed her breasts before she saw his mom.
“(Mama...)” Kenzo said. “(I can explain!)”
“(Pack your bags!)” his mother shouted.
“(Mama…)”
“(Pack your bags! You’re going home, boy!)” She and the kids walked into the apartment. “(You’re all disgusting!)”
Needless to say, Kenzo ended up going back to South Korea and Lilith cried on Aunt Megan’s lap at her house.
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