Categories > Games > Undertale > Alphys' Adventures
CHAPTER 6: DEATH BY GLAMOUR
The next morning, Alphys and friends woke up with an invitation to attend Mettaton's biggest show of all time as volunteers.
"Are you sure we should be doing this?" Alphys asked.
"Well, I mean, at this point...it's not like we have a choice." Sans sighed.
"Yeah, let's SMASH him up!" Undyne laughed.
"I, the GREAT Papyrus, will shower everyone in the audience with flowers and kisses!" Papyrus laughed.
"F* that, Columbo, let's shower him with SPEARS!" Undyne laughed, brandishing her spear as the four of them walked out of the hotel and took the taxi to the location where Mettaton's show was taking place.
"WOWIE! It's right in front of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art!" Papyrus squealed with joy.
"More like the Philadelphia Museum Of Us Whooping Mettaton's Shiny Metal Ass!" Undyne laughed.
"If by WHOOPING, you mean BITING, then yes. OWWWWWW!" Mettaton laughed through Alphys' cell communications device.
"Up yours, douche-face!" Sans chuckled, gasping with amazement as he finally finished driving his team to their destination and saw the sights that the locale had to offer.
As if the Philadelphia Museum Of Art didn't already look EPIC enough, it was now covered from head to toe with neon Christmas lights and even had an enormous, three-story-tall statue of Mettaton EX holding a colossal, two-story-tall, rainbow-diamond disco ball atop its roof.
And yes, the disco ball was also active.
"I hate to say this, but...we're gonna have a GOOD time." Sans chuckled as him and his friends approached the main plaza in front of the museum, with thousands of people surrounding them as lasers of brilliant light began to shoot out of the disco ball.
"Oh, no..." Alphys sighed.
"OHHHHHHHH, YESSSSSSSS!" Mettaton EX moaned orgasmically, blinding every single person in the general area with a massive flash of light as the disco ball opened up and he came out and descended sparklingly onto the plaza, standing right in front of his longtime adversaries, having them right where he had wanted them all along.
"We've all seen you on the field of battle and emotional struggles before, darlings...but now, let's see how good you are on the DANCE FLOOR, shall we? You beauties had better step your game up or else I'm afraid you're all going to face DEATH...death by GLAMOUR, no less!" Mettaton EX laughed as both him and all four of Alphys' team members suddenly went into another dimension entirely.
"W-where are we?" Papyrus wondered, looking around at the blank emptiness around himself.
"I think a better question would be WHEN are you going to GIVE UP?" Mettaton EX smirked. "I have transported not only myself, but also all four of you pathetic little cretins into an entire DIMENSION dedicated SOLELY to music videos! Do you know what this means?"
"Umm...that no one except us is even able to see us?" Sans snickered.
"Oh, believe me, they CAN see you! You'd better BELIEVE it!" Mettaton EX laughed. "Through the process of interdimensional broadcasting, I have made it so that EVERYONE on this entire PLANET is able to see us right now, and our performance is NOT going to disappoint!"
"What if it does and your stupid ratings finally end up flopping like they honestly deserve to?" Undyne smirked.
"THEN I'LL DESTROY EACH AND EVERY F*ING LAST ONE OF YOU!" Mettaton EX yelled. "You wanna know WHY I brought everyone hustling straight to the plaza of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art just for this one show alone?"
"Umm...let me guess...because you installed a giant freaking IMAX projector with a screen size the heighth and width of the building itself on the front of the museum or some crazy shit like that?" Alphys asked sarcastically.
"Well, that too...BUT ALSO BECAUSE THIS IS ONLY THE FIRST MOTHERF*ING ACT! I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR WHAT COMES NEXT, BEAUTIES! DANCE OR DIE, BITCHES!" Mettaton yelled valiantly as if he was uttering a battle cry.
"BORN IN A WORLD OF STRIFE!" Alphys yelled, striking a Ginyu Force pose.
"AGAINST THE ODDS!" Sans yelled, striking another Ginyu Force pose.
"WE CHOOSE TO FIGHT!" Undyne yelled, striking yet another Ginyu Force pose.
"BLOSSOM DANCE!" Papyrus yelled, striking the gayest pose of them all.
"Um, Sans? I think you might need to have a little talk with Papyrus." Undyne suggested.
"Nah, I'm used to it, let's just pretend it never happened, alright?" Sans chuckled.
"This music video will represent, and also manifest itself directly from...your inner thoughts, your inner struggles, your inner compassions...and, best of all, HOW YOU WILL FREAKING DIE. GOODBYE, MY DARLINGS!" Mettaton EX laughed maniacally.
And so the REAL dance battle finally began.
http://youtu.be/2TgO-tN5wAM
As the intro to Mettaton EX's theme song began playing, the entire lives of each character suddenly flashed before their eyes. And they were already dancing. It felt like the entire universe had unfolded itself around them, like they had just discovered the true meaning of life.
"READY, DARLINGS?" Mettaton EX asked them, striking a pose.
"Do you like my real form? Are you sweating, Alphy-poo?" Mettaton EX sang, twirling around and around like a ballerina while stage lights blared in the background.
"I created you and I can just as easily BREAK you!" Alphys sang back, pointing fiercely at Mettaton EX in a courtroom scene straight out of Ace Attorney.
"Yeah, I know you're just a bot, but don't be so immature." Sans sang, throwing his arms out beside him in an I JUST DON'T CARE look as a huge crowd of New Yorkers shook their heads in agreement behind him.
"Stupid little punks like you should learn the meaning of glamour!" Undyne sang, brandishing her spear and charging straight forward as the entire Royal Guard Army followed behind her.
"Mettaton is here to stay, to kill you all and reign supreme!" Mettaton EX laughed, stretching his arms out to the sides and firing laser beams from his hands, which Alphys and friends just barely managed to duck under as he spun around, deforesting a rather large woodland area.
"I guarantee that you'll never win! You're outnumbered by my team!" Alphys sang, reassembling her entire team into the classic Ginyu Force pose as the hyperspace warp effect from Star Wars covered the entire area around them.
"Can you hear my cheering fans? They're telling me you have no chance!" Papyrus sang, swinging a whip made out of spaghetti attached to a fork while the gates of Dracula's Castle slowly opened up behind him.
"News flash, little skele-bro: you don't even have any fans!" Mettaton EX sang, showing him a newspaper with PAPYRUS HAS NO FANS as the headline while giant MLG horns played behind him.
"Though I may not look like much, I'm more badass than you for sure!" Sans sang, summoning his Gaster Blasters as Hell itself blazed in the background.
"The general consensus is: you're cowardly, and a cur!" Papyrus sang, dabbing MTT-brand beauty yogurt behind his nonexistent ears as the Flying Spaghetti Monster summoned its spaghetti army behind him.
"You're a useless stupid tool, and you would dare call ME a fool?" Undyne sang, throwing her spear at Mettaton as the Royal Guard Army threw theirs at him in unison.
"Well, just remember: after we're done, you're gonna meet your fate!" Mettaton EX sang, firing homing missiles at Alphys and friends, who somehow managed to backflip right over them as explosions filled the background.
"Now...it's time...to lay your weapon down." Sans sang, winking as the message DON'T TRUST HIM was literally written all over the background behind him in various colors.
"If...I did...I wouldn't rule this town." Mettaton EX sang, exchanging laser blasts with Sans as various videos of the infamous Genocide Run boss fight against Sans filled the background.
"I...programmed...you just to entertain!" Alphys sang, brandishing a wrench in her arms as a classical painting of the birth of Adam (in this case, Mettaton) filled the background behind her.
"I'm...the brawn...but Alphys is the bra-a-a-a-ain!" Undyne sang, giving Alphys a bundle of flowers while random images of the pairing between her and Undyne filled the background.
"My power is like nothing you've ever seen; I am warning you now, I am wolverine-mean!" Sans sang, his eyesockets suddenly going blank as trees withered and burned in the background.
"If...you had go through what I do all the time, suicide wouldn't seem like so much of a crime!" Alphys sang, holding a bag of dog food and quivering in terror as the amalgamated remains of the test subjects of her infamous determination experiments surrounded her.
"I am handsome and strong, yet I'm innocent and nice; but if you doublecross me, you're paying the price!" Papyrus sang, donning his famous COOL DUDE outfit while numerous cameras snapped photos of him in the background.
"And I will not give up without putting up a fight; and when you're finally crushed, it'll be quite a sight!" Undyne sang as she and all three of her other main team members interlocked into a vicious fight against Mettaton EX for the final outro of the song while every single event of their game of origin flashed before their eyes yet again.
The music video finally ended, and there they all were again, standing right there on the entrance plaza of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art, with Mettaton EX kneeling on the ground, completely exhausted.
"Heh, looks like we really kicked his ass when we ganged up on him there!" Undyne laughed.
"Nearly all of my experiments have been utter disasters. And that also includes you as well, doesn't it? Poor thing..." Alphys sobbed gently.
"Maybe we just need to feed him some SPAGHETTI to make him feel better!" Papyrus chuckled.
"Hush, hush, everyone." Sans silenced his friends, summoning invisible joy buzzers onto both of his hands and approaching Mettaton EX, seemingly unassumingly.
"Hey, look, pal...I know you might be a little bit...intimidated by my presence here...you know, knowing how insanely powerful I am and all. But...would you mind giving me a little handshake? For old time's sake?" Sans winked at Mettaton EX, holding out his hands in an offer for Mettaton EX to grab them and pull himself back up onto his feet.
"Do you SERIOUSLY think I trust YOU?" Mettaton EX spat. "YOU? The freaking PRANKSTER of the bunch? The one who used to always deliberately hide how powerful he actually was?"
"Come on, buddy, I'll take you for ice cream and give you a hundred bucks if you just take my hands!" Sans promised him, trying not to laugh in the process.
"BOTH of them? REALLY?" Mettaton EX groaned. "Do I really have to grab BOTH of them for Christ's sake?"
"If we're really friends...YOU'LL DO IT." Sans threatened him, eyesockets suddenly going empty again as an indicator that Sans was, indeed, DEAD serious.
"Very well then...if you insist..." Mettaton EX sighed, reaching out and grabbing Sans' hands.
"CNXMZMVJFNBKGLTIYOUPFNSBRIVNSHGNFUGBYJDKSHSUAKAOQHSSU!!!" Mettaton EX screamed at the top of his lungs as he was electrocuted by both of Sans' joy buzzers at the same time, rendering him unconscious.
"OH MY GOD! IS HE OKAY?!" Alphys screamed. "PLEASE, METTATON, DON'T DIE ON ME, PLEASE!" she broke down and sobbed.
"Oh, don't worry, he's FINE! Just had a little, uh...ACCIDENT in his crotch area." Sans explained, blushing quite a lot as he pointed at the bleeding heart symbol between Mettaton EX's legs.
"Uhh...I c-can explain..." Alphys blushed and laughed awkwardly as everyone stared at her, starting to seriously wonder what was wrong with her.
"Alphys, back away! The big toy man is moving and it doesn't look very happy with you!" Papyrus warned Alphys, who backed away accordingly as Mettaton involuntarily transformed back into his box form.
"HIEVERYONEIMMETTATONANDITSNICETOSEEEVERYONETODAYHOWAREYOU!" Mettaton sprung right up off of the ground and rambled at a ridiculously fast word-processing rate as the sheer amount of electrical overload in his circuits suddenly brought him back to life!
"For the love of Neptune, just freaking DIE already!" Undyne groaned.
"Here we go again..." Alphys sighed, facepalming.
The next morning, Alphys and friends woke up with an invitation to attend Mettaton's biggest show of all time as volunteers.
"Are you sure we should be doing this?" Alphys asked.
"Well, I mean, at this point...it's not like we have a choice." Sans sighed.
"Yeah, let's SMASH him up!" Undyne laughed.
"I, the GREAT Papyrus, will shower everyone in the audience with flowers and kisses!" Papyrus laughed.
"F* that, Columbo, let's shower him with SPEARS!" Undyne laughed, brandishing her spear as the four of them walked out of the hotel and took the taxi to the location where Mettaton's show was taking place.
"WOWIE! It's right in front of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art!" Papyrus squealed with joy.
"More like the Philadelphia Museum Of Us Whooping Mettaton's Shiny Metal Ass!" Undyne laughed.
"If by WHOOPING, you mean BITING, then yes. OWWWWWW!" Mettaton laughed through Alphys' cell communications device.
"Up yours, douche-face!" Sans chuckled, gasping with amazement as he finally finished driving his team to their destination and saw the sights that the locale had to offer.
As if the Philadelphia Museum Of Art didn't already look EPIC enough, it was now covered from head to toe with neon Christmas lights and even had an enormous, three-story-tall statue of Mettaton EX holding a colossal, two-story-tall, rainbow-diamond disco ball atop its roof.
And yes, the disco ball was also active.
"I hate to say this, but...we're gonna have a GOOD time." Sans chuckled as him and his friends approached the main plaza in front of the museum, with thousands of people surrounding them as lasers of brilliant light began to shoot out of the disco ball.
"Oh, no..." Alphys sighed.
"OHHHHHHHH, YESSSSSSSS!" Mettaton EX moaned orgasmically, blinding every single person in the general area with a massive flash of light as the disco ball opened up and he came out and descended sparklingly onto the plaza, standing right in front of his longtime adversaries, having them right where he had wanted them all along.
"We've all seen you on the field of battle and emotional struggles before, darlings...but now, let's see how good you are on the DANCE FLOOR, shall we? You beauties had better step your game up or else I'm afraid you're all going to face DEATH...death by GLAMOUR, no less!" Mettaton EX laughed as both him and all four of Alphys' team members suddenly went into another dimension entirely.
"W-where are we?" Papyrus wondered, looking around at the blank emptiness around himself.
"I think a better question would be WHEN are you going to GIVE UP?" Mettaton EX smirked. "I have transported not only myself, but also all four of you pathetic little cretins into an entire DIMENSION dedicated SOLELY to music videos! Do you know what this means?"
"Umm...that no one except us is even able to see us?" Sans snickered.
"Oh, believe me, they CAN see you! You'd better BELIEVE it!" Mettaton EX laughed. "Through the process of interdimensional broadcasting, I have made it so that EVERYONE on this entire PLANET is able to see us right now, and our performance is NOT going to disappoint!"
"What if it does and your stupid ratings finally end up flopping like they honestly deserve to?" Undyne smirked.
"THEN I'LL DESTROY EACH AND EVERY F*ING LAST ONE OF YOU!" Mettaton EX yelled. "You wanna know WHY I brought everyone hustling straight to the plaza of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art just for this one show alone?"
"Umm...let me guess...because you installed a giant freaking IMAX projector with a screen size the heighth and width of the building itself on the front of the museum or some crazy shit like that?" Alphys asked sarcastically.
"Well, that too...BUT ALSO BECAUSE THIS IS ONLY THE FIRST MOTHERF*ING ACT! I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR WHAT COMES NEXT, BEAUTIES! DANCE OR DIE, BITCHES!" Mettaton yelled valiantly as if he was uttering a battle cry.
"BORN IN A WORLD OF STRIFE!" Alphys yelled, striking a Ginyu Force pose.
"AGAINST THE ODDS!" Sans yelled, striking another Ginyu Force pose.
"WE CHOOSE TO FIGHT!" Undyne yelled, striking yet another Ginyu Force pose.
"BLOSSOM DANCE!" Papyrus yelled, striking the gayest pose of them all.
"Um, Sans? I think you might need to have a little talk with Papyrus." Undyne suggested.
"Nah, I'm used to it, let's just pretend it never happened, alright?" Sans chuckled.
"This music video will represent, and also manifest itself directly from...your inner thoughts, your inner struggles, your inner compassions...and, best of all, HOW YOU WILL FREAKING DIE. GOODBYE, MY DARLINGS!" Mettaton EX laughed maniacally.
And so the REAL dance battle finally began.
http://youtu.be/2TgO-tN5wAM
As the intro to Mettaton EX's theme song began playing, the entire lives of each character suddenly flashed before their eyes. And they were already dancing. It felt like the entire universe had unfolded itself around them, like they had just discovered the true meaning of life.
"READY, DARLINGS?" Mettaton EX asked them, striking a pose.
"Do you like my real form? Are you sweating, Alphy-poo?" Mettaton EX sang, twirling around and around like a ballerina while stage lights blared in the background.
"I created you and I can just as easily BREAK you!" Alphys sang back, pointing fiercely at Mettaton EX in a courtroom scene straight out of Ace Attorney.
"Yeah, I know you're just a bot, but don't be so immature." Sans sang, throwing his arms out beside him in an I JUST DON'T CARE look as a huge crowd of New Yorkers shook their heads in agreement behind him.
"Stupid little punks like you should learn the meaning of glamour!" Undyne sang, brandishing her spear and charging straight forward as the entire Royal Guard Army followed behind her.
"Mettaton is here to stay, to kill you all and reign supreme!" Mettaton EX laughed, stretching his arms out to the sides and firing laser beams from his hands, which Alphys and friends just barely managed to duck under as he spun around, deforesting a rather large woodland area.
"I guarantee that you'll never win! You're outnumbered by my team!" Alphys sang, reassembling her entire team into the classic Ginyu Force pose as the hyperspace warp effect from Star Wars covered the entire area around them.
"Can you hear my cheering fans? They're telling me you have no chance!" Papyrus sang, swinging a whip made out of spaghetti attached to a fork while the gates of Dracula's Castle slowly opened up behind him.
"News flash, little skele-bro: you don't even have any fans!" Mettaton EX sang, showing him a newspaper with PAPYRUS HAS NO FANS as the headline while giant MLG horns played behind him.
"Though I may not look like much, I'm more badass than you for sure!" Sans sang, summoning his Gaster Blasters as Hell itself blazed in the background.
"The general consensus is: you're cowardly, and a cur!" Papyrus sang, dabbing MTT-brand beauty yogurt behind his nonexistent ears as the Flying Spaghetti Monster summoned its spaghetti army behind him.
"You're a useless stupid tool, and you would dare call ME a fool?" Undyne sang, throwing her spear at Mettaton as the Royal Guard Army threw theirs at him in unison.
"Well, just remember: after we're done, you're gonna meet your fate!" Mettaton EX sang, firing homing missiles at Alphys and friends, who somehow managed to backflip right over them as explosions filled the background.
"Now...it's time...to lay your weapon down." Sans sang, winking as the message DON'T TRUST HIM was literally written all over the background behind him in various colors.
"If...I did...I wouldn't rule this town." Mettaton EX sang, exchanging laser blasts with Sans as various videos of the infamous Genocide Run boss fight against Sans filled the background.
"I...programmed...you just to entertain!" Alphys sang, brandishing a wrench in her arms as a classical painting of the birth of Adam (in this case, Mettaton) filled the background behind her.
"I'm...the brawn...but Alphys is the bra-a-a-a-ain!" Undyne sang, giving Alphys a bundle of flowers while random images of the pairing between her and Undyne filled the background.
"My power is like nothing you've ever seen; I am warning you now, I am wolverine-mean!" Sans sang, his eyesockets suddenly going blank as trees withered and burned in the background.
"If...you had go through what I do all the time, suicide wouldn't seem like so much of a crime!" Alphys sang, holding a bag of dog food and quivering in terror as the amalgamated remains of the test subjects of her infamous determination experiments surrounded her.
"I am handsome and strong, yet I'm innocent and nice; but if you doublecross me, you're paying the price!" Papyrus sang, donning his famous COOL DUDE outfit while numerous cameras snapped photos of him in the background.
"And I will not give up without putting up a fight; and when you're finally crushed, it'll be quite a sight!" Undyne sang as she and all three of her other main team members interlocked into a vicious fight against Mettaton EX for the final outro of the song while every single event of their game of origin flashed before their eyes yet again.
The music video finally ended, and there they all were again, standing right there on the entrance plaza of the Philadelphia Museum Of Art, with Mettaton EX kneeling on the ground, completely exhausted.
"Heh, looks like we really kicked his ass when we ganged up on him there!" Undyne laughed.
"Nearly all of my experiments have been utter disasters. And that also includes you as well, doesn't it? Poor thing..." Alphys sobbed gently.
"Maybe we just need to feed him some SPAGHETTI to make him feel better!" Papyrus chuckled.
"Hush, hush, everyone." Sans silenced his friends, summoning invisible joy buzzers onto both of his hands and approaching Mettaton EX, seemingly unassumingly.
"Hey, look, pal...I know you might be a little bit...intimidated by my presence here...you know, knowing how insanely powerful I am and all. But...would you mind giving me a little handshake? For old time's sake?" Sans winked at Mettaton EX, holding out his hands in an offer for Mettaton EX to grab them and pull himself back up onto his feet.
"Do you SERIOUSLY think I trust YOU?" Mettaton EX spat. "YOU? The freaking PRANKSTER of the bunch? The one who used to always deliberately hide how powerful he actually was?"
"Come on, buddy, I'll take you for ice cream and give you a hundred bucks if you just take my hands!" Sans promised him, trying not to laugh in the process.
"BOTH of them? REALLY?" Mettaton EX groaned. "Do I really have to grab BOTH of them for Christ's sake?"
"If we're really friends...YOU'LL DO IT." Sans threatened him, eyesockets suddenly going empty again as an indicator that Sans was, indeed, DEAD serious.
"Very well then...if you insist..." Mettaton EX sighed, reaching out and grabbing Sans' hands.
"CNXMZMVJFNBKGLTIYOUPFNSBRIVNSHGNFUGBYJDKSHSUAKAOQHSSU!!!" Mettaton EX screamed at the top of his lungs as he was electrocuted by both of Sans' joy buzzers at the same time, rendering him unconscious.
"OH MY GOD! IS HE OKAY?!" Alphys screamed. "PLEASE, METTATON, DON'T DIE ON ME, PLEASE!" she broke down and sobbed.
"Oh, don't worry, he's FINE! Just had a little, uh...ACCIDENT in his crotch area." Sans explained, blushing quite a lot as he pointed at the bleeding heart symbol between Mettaton EX's legs.
"Uhh...I c-can explain..." Alphys blushed and laughed awkwardly as everyone stared at her, starting to seriously wonder what was wrong with her.
"Alphys, back away! The big toy man is moving and it doesn't look very happy with you!" Papyrus warned Alphys, who backed away accordingly as Mettaton involuntarily transformed back into his box form.
"HIEVERYONEIMMETTATONANDITSNICETOSEEEVERYONETODAYHOWAREYOU!" Mettaton sprung right up off of the ground and rambled at a ridiculously fast word-processing rate as the sheer amount of electrical overload in his circuits suddenly brought him back to life!
"For the love of Neptune, just freaking DIE already!" Undyne groaned.
"Here we go again..." Alphys sighed, facepalming.
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