Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)

Part 2: She's Bewitched (Enchanted, Charmed, Spellbound, Possessed and Other Magic Related Puns)

by Marvolo666 0 reviews

finding the perfect dress and other shenanigans

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor,Parody,Romance - Characters: Cho,Ginny,Harry,Hermione,Luna - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2017-02-14 - 4368 words

2Original
Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)
By Marvolo666
Beta Read by PenguinAgen

Part 2: She's Bewitched (Enchanted, Charmed, Spellbound, Possessed and Other Magic Related Puns)

"Life is wonderful"
Luna thought those three words every morning when she woke up… except for today. Today, she sang them out loud, unleashing a night's worth of the happiest dreams she ever dreamed and startling a cat that had been sleeping in the common room. Luna was a sleepwalker, but thankfully Filius had put up a charm to prevent her from leaving the Ravenclaw common room by herself unless she was conscious. The other Ravenclaws had tried leading the sleeping girl into the halls before locking her out of the dormitories, but Luna always seemed to find a way back inside before waking.
Luna loved her life today because she was completely and utterly in love. Just thinking about Harry made her think of kisses and hugs and rabbits and bees and Snorkacks and… What?
Luna quickly cast anti-Nargle spells around herself before she returned to her thoughts. Luna was attending the Yule ball with the sweet Harry Potter. Who made her think of pudding for some reason and was the sweetest sweety in the sweet kiss…"
"Uh, Loony?"
Luna opened her eyes and looked down to see a Michael Corner looking up at her. "Hello, did you shrink yourself Michael Corner?"
"No… you're sort of floating."
Luna looked down at her feet and saw they were three feet off the floor. Luna uttered "Oh" before dropping to the floor. "OW"

Luna hopped out of the hospital wing while Madam Pomfrey shook her head in dismay. "It's a wonder her leg isn't crooked by now."

Luna arrived at the great hall and smiled practically singing as she sat at her table and began pouring maple syrup on her flapjacks. She looked up and noticed Harry watching her with more than a hint of mirth on his face. She smiled and he smiled back with those sweet lips. Luna wondered how sweet they would be if they met her own… the idea that they would be sweeter than maple syrup was inconceivable yet she was certain it was true. The idea made her feel sticky… wait, under further evaluation, Luna determined it wasn't the idea so much as the gallons of syrup she had been pouring. It seemed to have overflowed and flooded the table.
Filius was already there, vanishing the syrup and Luna started feeling less sticky. Luna's face was red and she assumed this was what embarrassment was like. She wasn't sure what that boy's kind laughter had to do with the strange emotion. If anything she felt rather ticklish to hear his laugh. It was different than what she was used to. Instead of laughing at her, it felt like he was laughing with her. Luna realized this was because she was laughing too.
Hermione shook her head at the girl's antics. Frankly, she couldn't remember Harry laughing so hard and she had known him for over three years. Ron looked at Luna with a confused smile. "And I thought you were mental, Hermione."
Hermione's gaze narrowed. "Ron! The only mental one is you. I mean sure Luna is a little… unique, but she's not mental. Right, Harry?" she said.
Harry shrugged uncertainly causing Hermione to exclaim, "HARRY!"
"Hermione, Luna's a wonderful sweet girl, she also asked if Quirrell was my secret lover...so maybe a little?"
Ron spat out his food (a first time for everything) and started gagging while Hermione turned a little green. "Ok… maybe she is a little mental," Hermione said.
"Only a little, the girls barking." Ron exclaimed.
"Look, I've been in the Wizarding world for less then four years and from my experience, most of you are mental."
"That's Mental!"
"You're all mental," Ginny replied with a twinkle in her eye, catching them off guard. Ginny had been so quiet lately that Harry could hardly believe Ron when he said she was a loud feisty tomboy. Yet it seemed over the last few months that the old Ginny was making more appearances as the memory of Tom grew dimmer. "Luna has definitely earned her Loony nickname, but if I hear any of you mentioning it I'll make you eat your own snot."
At this, Ron left the table, his plate half full (another first), allowing Ginny to scoot over beside Hermione and looked over her shoulder. "I've never seen her act like that though, and I never knew you two knew each other. So she's your date then," she said looking back at Harry.
Harry struggled not to choke on his food as he nodded. "How does everyone keep finding out?"
"Hermione told me," Ginny replied causing Hermione to blush under Harry's glare. Ginny raised her eyebrows threateningly. "What? Are you embarrassed of your date? Are you ashamed?"
"What? No! I just…it's not anyone's business" Harry replied, "Besides, I'm already worried about what Rita will write about her."
"I have a funny feeling she's going to have her work cut out for her," Hermione said with an unsettling smile.

Luna skipped down the all…or at least she pretended to. Hopping on one leg and crutches was rather tiring and most boring. She was certain she would be late for class as her book bag around her neck was holding her back and choking her a little.
"You need help," Ginny said as she took the bag off Luna's neck letting her gasp for much need air.
Luna nodded as she smiled. "Thanks Ginny, it's been awhile since we've spoken."
Ginny frowned. "It has?"
"Since first year," Luna replied, "But you seemed preoccupied with your Mortermite infestation."
"What?"
"They thrive on dark magic and paper, they are often found in trees, animated rabbits and books," Luna replied with a smile.
Ginny seemed to shiver but frowned as she focused on her old friend. "Has it really been that long?"
Luna looked a Ginny and sighed. "I missed you, Ginny."
Ginny sighed as well, "I missed Ginny too, but she's back now. I'm not going to let Mortermites, books or Tom stop me from being-"
"Who's Tom?" Luna asked.
Ginny shook her head. "Never mind that. When are you going to tell me about your date to the Yule ball?"
Luna's eyes became unfocused as she smiled, causing Ginny to laugh. "Even after all the things I've seen since coming to Hogwarts, I never thought I'd see Luna Lovegood swoon."
Luna blushed and muttered. "I don't swoon."
"I don't blame you, there was a time being Harry's date would've made me faint," Ginny replied with a blush.
Luna tilted her head. "Wrackspurts tend to do that to you."
Ginny giggled. "You haven't changed a bit."
"5 points to Gryffindor for helping a fellow student to class," Professor McGonagall said as the two witches entered the transfiguration class, "though it would be nice if you could be on time."
Ginny looked down muttered "Yes mam."
Luna looked up and simply hummed. "I'll try, but the future is a mystery."
Ginny helped Luna into her seat as class continued but Ginny's mind was focused on her reunited friend. Ginny couldn't help but feel guilty for abandoning her old friend. She could tell Luna had been lonely but Ginny had been more focused on her own problems. Ginny may not have been lonely but she had been alone. Things were changing, she felt reborn and was discovering things about herself she would never have dreamed. Thinking about Luna also made Ginny think of the ball and the one she longed for...
"Miss Weasley, please pay attention," McGonagall said before continuing her class.
Ginny looked over to Luna and saw her mind was far away, as usual. Ginny whispered to her, "What are you wearing to the Yule Ball."
Luna looked at her and whispered. "I don't know? Probably something to keep away the Nargles. I have a necklace made of Butterbeer caps."
Ginny shook her head in dismay. This was going to be a long day.

Hermione glared at Ron. "My date is none of your business."
"You're my friend, that makes it my business," Ron shot back while Harry groaned. Harry definitely cared who Hermione's date was but didn't see the harm in waiting till the ball before deciding if he should curse him or not. At the moment he just wished Ron and Hermione would stop fighting.
"Ron, the Yule Ball's in three days. Does it really matter if Hermione wants to keep it a secret until then?" Harry interrupted the bickering pair. "Besides if it's really an issue we can always threaten him at the Ball."
"No, you can't!" Hermione said, "If either of you two threatens my date I will-"
"But what if it's someone like Malfoy," Ron interrupted.
"Then hell has frozen over," Harry butted in before Hermione cursed Ron.
"You know what I think?" Hermione said, now fuming, "You're jealous."
"What!" Ron said, taken aback.
"Yes. I think you're jealous that I've got a date to the Yule Ball and you don't," Hermione hissed.
"That's absurd!" Ron growled despite blushing beat red, "Besides I'm not the only one without a date."
"What do you mean?" Hermione whispered dangerously.
"I think you won't tell anyone your date because he doesn't exist," Ron yelled triumphantly only to get slapped in the face.
"I didn't tell you my date because I didn't want you using me to pester him for his autograph," Hermione shouted as she stormed out of the common room.
Ron cursed and took off muttering something about mental witches. While Harry stayed in the now empty common room. Ron was clearly too overcome by anger to use his brain, but Harry was putting all the pieces together. He quickly took out his map and uttered the words that his father had written many years ago. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good."
Harry found the name he was looking for and ran off to find him. As Harry ran down the halls he wondered if his Father would be upset if he was not always up to no good when he used. He also wasn't sure if this counted as one of those times. He was sure Hermione would kill him...oh there he is.
Surprisingly enough, he was in the library, though maybe that explained how they met. Harry grabbed a book from the nearest shelf and tried to act inconspicuous as he sat down beside him. He pretended to read as he snuck a peak at him, only to meet his eyes. He raised an eyebrow as he said in his thick accent, "I have enough... fan girls... don't need fan boy too."
Harry tried to look confused and offended, but the he looked at the book in his hand saw the title: "How to get your Wizard by Rita Skeeter."
Harry practically flung the book away causing the Bulgarian to laugh. "You know then."
Harry looked at Krum and said, "Not for certain but I'm pretty sure I'm right...Hermione?"
Victor meet Harry's stair and answered, "We have similar taste in books."
Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You certainly don't seem like the reading type."
"You British think me silent type. I speak good, I speak lots. But in English? I can hardly speak at all. Enough small talk. You here to ask my...what is word...intent to Hermy-own-ninny?"
Harry tried to hide his laugh with a cough, but he was pretty sure it was noticed. "Hermione's not just my best friend, she's the closest thing I have to a sister. She's like family and...well...I don't have much in the way of family."
Victor nodded. "I understand. I lost my Mother at young age, and my Father has been ill for long time. I've met many others who have lost family. Hermy-own-ninny means a lot to you. My lover means much to me too."
Harry frowned. "Hermione's your girlfriend? Your lover?"
"No, just a new dear friend. My love is back at Durmstrang. I miss love dearly, but felt this tournament was something I must do. Hermy-own-ninny is nice and mature for her age, but she is still child. I never was one. She cares for you Potter, but she has problems only she can solve. I can offer guidance you can't yet and that other boy never will."
"Somethings wrong with Hermione," Harry uttered his face going pale, "What's wrong? Please tell me, I can help her."
"No, you can't. She is not in danger, but life is strange. You do not have the wisdom. I don't either but I have had her problem too. It is why she trust me with secret. You can only be there and help her when she is ready to share. Hopefully, she won't need you for that. You good friend but my motives are friendly, no more."
Harry looked at him. "You know your English isn't that bad at all."
Krum laughed. "Well I don't way I sound when speak English. You fly good, maybe we fly together later. For now, I must return to ship. Good luck in tournament, and at ball."
Krum shook his hand and walked away as Harry was deep in thought." Well that didn't go as I expected. Victor Krum said I'm a good flyer...should have gotten his autograph...for Ron...and Hermione...and Luna...and Ginny...to sell...to keep for myself...why am I still here?"

"How about this?" Luna asked Ginny as she wore a dress clearly made of actual Christmas tree thistles.
Ginny gasped. "Doesn't that hurt?"
Luna nodded. "Most tremendously, but it will also catch Harry's attention."
Ginny shook her head, wondering what the Ravenclaws would think if they returned to their beds to see Luna like this. "Yes, but not that kind of attention. How is he supposed to dance with you if you are covered in thistles."
Luna thought about it for a moment and nodded. "You have a point."
Luna grabbed her wand and cast a switching charm on her dress replacing it with the next one. Ginny couldn't tell what it looked like, as she was too busy shielding her eyes from the light. "What the bloody hell is that?!"
Luna replied, "It's a dress my Father bought. The warlock said it was the most beautiful dress in the world, but no human is able to lay their eyes upon it."
"Nox." Ginny cast with her wand and the light went out. Luna was wearing a rather dreary old dress.
"That's odd...it's not very pretty at all, is it?" Luna replied rather confused.
"Yes, what a shock," Ginny said as she motioned for Luna to try on the next dress.
Luna complied, her dress was covered in actual snow. Ginny didn't have to say anything, as the dress was causing Luna to freeze. Luna appeared in many other dresses. One was a costume of Father Christmas that came with a beard. Another was covered in silver bells but made way too much noise, plus it was rather ugly. One of Ginny's favorites was covered with cat faces but it would hiss anytime Ginny approached Luna. Luna was most disappointed when Ginny vetoed the singing dress. It was beautiful, but would serenade the wearer with Christmas carols, the problem being that it was dreadfully out of tune. The last dress simply screamed causing Luna to switch back to her school robes as her ears started ringing.
"This is ridiculous," Ginny exclaimed rubbing her own ears, "Don't you have anything normal? Or pretty? Something that's not some clever gimmick."
Luna frowned. "I thought it was supposed to get Harry's attention. You don't seem to like any of these dresses."
Ginny groaned. "Yes get his attention by being pretty, not by having your dress blind him, or freeze him, or hiss at him, or..."
"Pardon me, but why would I want to look pretty? He is only inviting me as a friend...even though he's nice and sweet and handsome and kind and-"
"Yes, you are going as friends but wouldn't you rather him be more than a friend," Ginny egged on cutting off Luna's musings.
Luna nodded slowly as she spoke, "I never thought much of Harry, or any boy, before I met him. He saved me, he was nice gentle and kind. He didn't laugh at me, he listened to me. Even though he doesn't believe the all the things I say, he seems to believe me, if that makes sense. When I told him about my Mother he really felt for me. His eyes were so powerful then, it made me feel like I was being hugged. When he said he wanted to be my friend I was happier than ever before. When I realized he really wanted to got to the ball with me, even with my bad leg, I thought I would die of happiness. Then he kissed me on the cheek and… I kissed him on his. It was bliss, Nirvana. I was intoxicated by the way those lips made my body turn to butter and made my soul sore. I don't consciously remember realizing I was in love. I just knew it in my heart. As soon as he found me in that cupboard, my heart never had a chance."
"I was mad with love. I started thinking of things I never thought of before. Silly, loony things like marriage, children, a future, lots of kisses and even… making love." Luna whispered the last part beat red, making Ginny giggle like a school girl...witch she technically was. Luna's expression saddened though as she spoke, "Mother said to be thankful for the things you got. I'm lucky to be his friend, I've been his friend for one day and I haven't spoken to him since he asked me to the ball. I've gained so much in so short a time. I miss him...I don't want to lose him, never see him or talk to him again."
Ginny pulled Luna into a hug. "If you really love him then maybe it's worth the risk?"
Luna suddenly frowned. "Why didn't you ask him out. Was it because of the Mortermites?"
Ginny turned beat red. "If you count that awful Valentine's I sent him first year then yes, I did ask him out. However, I like someone else now...not my date sadly."
"What's wrong with Neville? I mean other than the Nargles in his brain," Luna asked with a quirk of the eye.
"Nothing...it's a long story but Neville's a good friend and nothing more," Ginny said with haste before quickly adding, "Now enough about me, wouldn't you like to see Harry in a nice handsome tuxedo? His hair flattened...if that's possible. Would you like to see his emerald eyes look at you with awe at your beauty? Wouldn't you like him to see you as a princess, his princes?"
Luna was closing her eyes, smiling dreamily as Ginny's words torment. Ginny then went at a different angle. "Wouldn't you love to be the envy of the ball. The girl they all make fun of being the most beautiful girl there and with the date they all wanted. Luna Lovegood with the Hogwarts champion who flew circles around a dragon."
Luna would never admit it to another soul, but the idea only added to the appeal of Ginny's words. Luna had never cared for what others thought, but then again, no one had ever thought much of her at all. The image of the school, usually dismissing her as a loony, staring in awe of her beauty, triggered something deep inside her…but Luna was mostly just thinking of Harry.
Luna hastily rushed Ginny out of her dormitory. "I have just the dress. I'll see you at the ball. Bye, Ginny."
Ginny didn't know how she ended up out the Ravenclaw tower so fast, but decided to give Luna the benefit of the doubt. Frankly, Ginny was just glad Luna didn't have a dress made of fire.

The next day Xenophilius was busy trying to determine if Nargles were eating his vegetables or if it was just the saber-toothed chipmunk rumored to have manifested in these parts of England. Of course, it could just be the weather, it was winter after all. Nah it must be saber-toothed chipmunks.
Xenophilius saw something in the sky and knew he was under attack. So he went into defense protocol 73.
...
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Xenophilius started firing curses while running in circles. The attacker hit him in the face and knocked him down. Xenophilius plugged his ears as the creature started hooting. Clearly, it was trying to infiltrate his brain.
Xenophilius eventually opened his eyes and looked around but the attacker was gone. Xenophilius sighed in relief as he noticed a letter was in his hand. "How did this get here?"
He opened the letter a read it. "Oh dear. It seem my Moonchild is in love...or going undercover to get information on The Boy Who Lived. This could be highly dangerous and get my daughter killed! Or she's in love...Nah she's only 6 years old...I think..." he shook his head, "Oh well, better send the dress. AHA Gnomes! Oh, garden dwellers please I offer you my flesh to infect with your saliva."

It was the night before the ball when Hermione asked if Harry could speak to her for a moment in private. After meeting in an empty classroom, Hermione cut straight to the point. "I got an interesting letter from Victor."
"Really?" Harry responded before realizing he had already given himself away, "I mean who? Know what, he probably told you in the latter."
"Brilliant deduction Sherlock," Hermione said, "Maybe you should be focusing that logic on your golden egg instead of my love life."
"I thought you were just friends," Harry muttered.
"Did you think that before speaking to him?" Hermione shot back.
"I just wanted to make sure you were ok," Harry mumbled.
Hermione's eyes softened as she gave him a hug. "I'll give you a pass this time because you were being real sweet, but consider my love life off limits. Agreed?"
Harry quickly did. "Frankly I was thinking the same thing. If you need me though."
"I know the first person to go to. Now for the other thing I wanted to speak to you about. I know Victor said something about me having a problem but it's nothing serious. It's just things I need to figure out and I need to do that myself. However, I am not in trouble I don't need your help, so please don't press this or I'll curse your ears off," Hermione said without breathing.
Harry nodded quickly as Hermione continued, "Now about your date, are you ready for tomorrow?"
Harry nodded with a smile, then slowly frowned and shook his head. "I don't know the first thing about dances."
Hermione nodded in thought. "Well, you have to understand Luna probably knows less than you on this. If you want to make her happy, treat her like she's a princess. Don't look at other girls and focus all your attention on her. Cater to her every need. Don't drink too much punch, as I heard the twins are going to slip firewiskey into it. Oh and don't swear, it's rude at formal events. Don't kiss her at the end of the date unless she seems to want it. Kiss her hand or cheek instead. Most importantly, don't hurt her leg while dancing. I have no idea how you are going to pull that off."
Harry was surprised Hermione didn't pass out after saying all that in one breath, but he smiled at the end. "Don't worry about the dance. I have a plan for that. Well, Snuffles does."

"I heard a rumour that Loony's going to the Yule ball."
"With who?"
"No one knows but her dad sent her a dress."
"Probably going to crash the party to see the Korkles or some rubbish."
"Either way I think it's high time we get rid of her. I have an idea for the prank of all pranks. A prank that even the Weasley twins would shudder at."
"What is it?"
"I read it from a Muggle book and it's so good it will make her drop out or go completely insane. Now what we need is some pig's blood.
"...How do you not know what a pig is? You can't tell me you only know magical animals."
...
"Anyway, in the book I read, there's this girl who goes mad after a prank with pig's blood. She kills everyone at the ball."
"Would loony..."
"Nah she wouldn't harm a fly...right?"
...
"Ok, no pig's blood. But we'll get her good for this...HAHAHAHA!"
"Merlin that was a seriously messed up laugh,"
"Sorry, but I have been hanging around my boyfriend a lot and...I got it!

Luna looked at herself in the mirror admiring her dress. Luna was not vain but for the first time in her life, she truly felt beautiful. Like a princess. Luna never felt so excited and knew there would be no sleep tonight for her. Instead, she hummed to herself as she wrote in her dairy. Writing about Nargles, Wrackspurts and green-eyed Wizards. At the end, she wrote, "I have never wished for much, but I wish with all my might that tomorrow goes perfectly."
Historians would argue throughout the ages if Luna's wish came true or not.
But they all agreed it was a night no one would ever forget...

So don't miss the finale chapter of...
Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)
Part 3: Great Balls of Fire (Or some other awesome name)
What Will Happen to Harry and Luna?
Who does Ginny love? What is Hermione's secret?
Will someone die a horrible death at the Yule Ball and if so Who?
Is Marvolo666 taking this too far?
Will you also read The Curious Case of Luna Lovegood?
Will you, the wonderful reader Follow, Favorite, and Review?
It would be awfully nice of you.
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