FicWad

n 1999/2000, so take your pick. It's a must see, by the way. Anyhow, WARNING: If you are offended by Homosexual Relationships then I suggest you discontinue reading this, or keep going at your own discretion. Remember, it's A PLAY, not the actual bible. And finally, I do not own Jesus Christ Superstar or the Characters. They belong to Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rioce. :)

Jesus x Judas
Judas x Simon implied
*********
"Christ you know I love you, did you see I waved? I believe in you and God, so tell me that I'm saved..."
Judas sat far away from the crowd, away from the firelight. A mate had let them use the property for the night and now the bonfire was going strong and the noise of the laughing apostles as they cracked open cans of beer was almost overpowering. Even in the silence. It was so tempting, the urge to get up and dance, to sing, to get drunk, and to laugh even... In short, it was tempting to ignore all the problems in the world. Judas sighed and took a long swig of his Bourbon and Cola. They could play act for now, but it was going to go terribly wrong .Judas could feel it. He laughed, weakly. All these fools were dancing around like show ponies and getting smashed off their faces. Ah, couldn't they see what they were doing? If they kept drawing attention to themselves, no amount of alcohol would be able to fix the consequences. It was all too easy to see. Soon the priests would take a stand. They'd get their crime, oh yes. He could see it so clearly. The wheels would be set in motion and there would be no way to stop it. They would come, they would bring their armies and their guns and there would be a fight - futile of course- and after that? They'd take Him and... Judas tossed his empty can over his shoulder and buried his face in his hands, desperately trying to keep the tears back. Well, he didn't want to think about what would come next.

Judas forced himself to look up. He kept trying to tell himself that he was being paranoid, but every time he snuck a glance at the bonfire proceedings, he became less sure. There would be no way they'd stay out of the fire with that damned Zealot running around. Automatically he sought out the blond spikes that seemed to exude the confidence and open rebellion of their bearer, who was darting around Jesus and the others to dish out beer and propaganda. With a start, he realised that his instinctive search seemed awfully familiar.
"Damn you Simon." He muttered under his breath, searching around his feet for another can.
Looking at him from a distance, Judas found it easier to see why Jesus was tolerant of his rowdy behaviour and his adolescent obsession with fighting... As much as Judas disliked - no- despised the Zealot he had to admit that he was... Charismatic. The brunette ran a hand through his short hair, hating himself. Who was he kidding with charisma? Simon was gorgeous. Simply fucking gorgeous. That had to be it... None of the other apostles would dream of starting a riot with the Government...Not only did he have a knack for getting Judas in trouble, but the Zealot could get away with murder, it seemed, and only wind up with a slap on his beautifully tanned wrist. The Brat.

"Yo, Iscariot!"
Judas gritted his teeth and leaned back on the tree, indolently.
"Zealotes."
Simon appeared oblivious to the resentment.
"Whatcha doin'?"
"I was enjoying the peace, until some nosy pisshead came and interrupted me. What about you, Simon? What are you doing?" Despite the pang of guilt he felt, Judas had to admit that the little pout that appered on the other man's lips was delicious.
The Zealot held out his gloved hands in surrender, his brown eyes defensive.
"Yo, easy man." He shrugged. "Just looking out for you..."
Judas sniggered. "Oh Yeah...? Well don't."
“Jesus fuck, dude. You are such a fucking asshole.”
“Well-”
“Just shut the fuck up, Judas. I try to be nice to you, and you fucking call me a pisshead. I know you haven’t actually said that yet, but I know you will. You fucking asshole. You utter bufoon. You wanna know why nobody here likes you? You have some sort of need to shove people completely unprovoked. Seriously, someone will just be sitting there, having a good time, and you just shove them and walk away. What the fuck? And the whole “waking every goddamn person up with the same song at 3 in the morning” routine. You think Jesus is the only one annoyed by that? Literally everyone can hear you. Everybody knows you hate me and everyone else here, so why don’t you just leave? You’re a dick to nearly everyone you talk to, you go around physically assaulting people for no reason, AND your screechy singing wakes everyone up EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. Please get the fuck out of here. Please.”

Suddenly, there was a gunshoot. Here to kill Jesus and Judas, it was…. The Tiger Mafia.

“Where the fuck is Judus” boomed the Tiger Mafia, collectively. But before anyone could answer, Judas was shot dead. He was such a fucking asshole that God took care of him to save the Mafia the trouble of doing so. Then, in a shower of bullets, Jesus died. then the Tiger Mafia left, just as quickly as they came.

i’m kinda sad about Jesus dying, but at least Judas is gone. I hated him.” said Mary Magdalene.

“Agreed.” said Peter, gayley.

"And also I'm in love with Pilate. In case you were not aware." said Mary Madgalgyie7ws

Then Simon and Peter got married. They were waiting till it was guaranteed that Judas couldn’t come to the wedding. They were originally hoping for a scheduling conflict of some sort, but Judas being murdered worked too. Also Annas died of a heart attack. Only UNNAMED PRIEST #2 attended his funeral.

Fin.