FicWad

I squint as I clamber through the noisy hallway, through the patch that is bathed in a particularly annoying streak of sunlight. At this hour in the morning, I do not need to be temporarily blinded. Not when I have the chance to see her.
Oh, wait, that’s after next period, not now. Either way, though, I don’t like the sunlight piercing my eyes this early in the morning.
I wonder if anyone has noticed me noticing her. I doubt it, but still. I worry that my gaze may be seen as rude, but I don’t dislike her, I swear. In reality, she means everything to me. Well, she will, once I get to know her.
You see, everyone has a soulmate, we all know the spiel that our parents tell us when we’re kids, about how life is literally black and white (which is pretty obvious, unless you’re blind) until you see the person you’re supposed to fall in love with and then color rushes into everything. So, you can probably imagine my surprise when first day of junior year, a transfer student comes in and looking at her is the first time I see the difference between a redhead and a blonde, or a red shirt and a blue shirt.
I think I’ve memorized her, and if I haven’t I’m working on it. She’s pretty much the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. She’s got this hair that’s the same color of the ocean, a soothing greenish blue. And the texture of it makes it look like rough waves on a stormy day. And her eyes, god, her eyes. They look like vats of chocolate, except for when the light hits them. When the sun hits her eye, her irises look like honey, and it’s breathtaking. I swear she’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.
I’m pretty sure it’s her. Maybe it was someone else, but no one’s said anything. Most of the people here I’ve known all my life. It wouldn’t make sense for it to be anyone but her, unless there was a second new student near her that I caught a glimpse of and forgot about or something, but that’s highly unlikely.
I sort of wish that’s what happened, though, these feeling I have are freaking me out. I think I might be sick. It just doesn’t feel right. Every time I think about it, I get a tightness in my chest, and a headache like I’ve been staring at the sun. I don’t know, maybe something’s wrong with me. Not only that, but how could an average guy like me be destined to be with her? It just seems unfair for her. Unless she likes the whole “punk guy” thing I’m trying to do. Maybe she likes that. I hope she does.
I’ve noticed that I think about her a lot. In school, at home. When I’m combing my annoyingly messy black hair, or putting on my frayed jean jacket. Wherever, whenever really. Right now, as I stroll into third period and take my seat in the back, next to my friend Neil, in the desk with a skull carved on the top right corner and a bunch of sticky old gum on the bottom, I’m still thinking about her. I have to stop at some point though. I do my best to pay attention, but you really can’t blame me for zoning out and day dreaming during English class, right?
Neil, he pays attention. It’d be weird if he didn’t. He’s one of those studious types, who freaks out if he gets a B. That’s why I’m surprised when right as Mrs. Heartfeild finishes up her lecture of the day, instead of asking extra questions about Jay Gatsby, he turns to me.
“God,” he sighs, “I hope I meet my soulmate soon, before I die of all the anxiety school throws at me.” I chuckle at first, having thought the same thing myself a couple times. Before I actually saw her, I mean. There’s kind of an issue, though, see, I haven’t told anyone, including Neil, about my soulmate. I doubt he would believe me anyway, what are the chances of meeting your soulmate at this age? To be completely honest, I don’t even know her name.
I realize I forgot to respond. “Oh, uh, yeah. Me too, man.”
Neil looks puzzled, like he’s trying to solve an equation in his brain. All I can do is pray he gets the wrong answer. “Greg, are you alright? You look a little sick,” he asks.
“Huh? Oh, no, I’m totally fine.” I pause, he looks unconvinced. I scramble for something reasonable to say. “I just have a, uh, a test. Later, I have a test that I’m super unprepared for. Probably gonna fail it.”
“What class is it for, I might be able to help.” I can almost see the gears turning in his head. He’s going to know, and soon. Maybe he won’t know exactly, but he’ll know somethings up.
“It’s, um.” Think, think, think, Greg! What’s something he doesn’t know about… “It’s a proficiency for band! On the xylophone, which I still don’t quite know how to play. You know, I’m way better at note-less rhythm on the drum-set.”
He looks at me skeptically. “That was an unnecessarily long pause, dude. What’s up with you? Marylin didn’t say anything about a proficiency for band, and you guys are in the same class, right? She normally freaks out about that stuff.”
I forgot. His twin sister is also a percussionist. In my class.
“Look, I just. I don’t want to talk about it, okay?” I think my tone was a little harsher than I meant. I know it’s impolite, and bad to keep secrets, but I can’t tell him, not if I don’t know if it’s even her.
“What the hell, we’ve known each other for forever. We’ve played Guitar Hero together every Sunday since seventh grade. I don’t keep secrets from you, just tell me what’s going on.” He pauses, sighing. “I just want to know if I can help you.” The bell rings, class is over, and I can get away. I pull my bag up, one-shouldering it out of the classroom. I feel lucky to be out of the conversation, I don’t know how much longer I could’ve held him at bay. But his fourth period class is in the opposite direction of mine, so that’ll be the end of it for now. At least that’s what I think, but before I know it Neil’s behind me, grabbing at my shoulder. “Is it about the soulmate thing I said?”
“Shut up, Neil,” I whisper, turning to look at him.
“Greg, c’mon, you can tell me anything—"
“I don’t want to make a big deal out of this.”
“Just tell me what you don’t want to make a big deal out of—”
“Soulmates! I mean, who cares. No one sees them this early…,” I stop talking. Maybe I shouldn’t have left it open like that, but I don’t care anymore. He would’ve found out eventually.
“So, it is!” he says in a loud whisper. “Are you, like, nervous about it? Maybe worrying you don’t have one? No matter what, man, you can talk to me about it.”
“Why does it matter to you so much? It’s not like she’s your soulmate.” Oops.
He stands there, looking stunned. “You know who it is?” his eyes are gleaming and he has on his signature cheek-splitting grin. “Who is it?”
I stumble through the same spot of light again, squinting. God, my head hurts. “First, could you pipe down? Second, that’s kinda the issue. I don’t know her name.”
“But you’ve seen her, you could point her out to me! I might know her.” he says, his voice is still loud, but quieter than before. It’ll do.
“Okay, well, we’re coming up on the hallway where I see her every day, if I look hard enough. Thing is, I don’t know if it really is her.”
He stopped for a second before catching up to me. “You aren’t sure if it’s her? How?”
“She never said anything to me, Neil. It could be someone else I caught a glimpse of, for all I know. No one’s said anything to me, that’s why I’ve kept it a secret. I was thinking, well. Maybe my brain malfunctioned, or whatever the word for that would be. Maybe it went off early. Maybe my soulmate isn’t here, and I’ll never know when I meet them because my head’s a piece of shit.
“Man,” he starts, “that is the most dramatic monologue-esque shit I’ve ever heard. I’ve never heard of that happening to anyone. You know what I think?”
“What?” My voice sounds on guard. I’m kind of interested in what he has to say, but also kind of annoyed at his persistence at the topic.
“I think you should retrace your steps—”
Nope I’m not doing that. “Neil, don’t you have a class to get to? I know you’re excited and all, but aren’t you supposed to go to the other side of the building?”
He starts to say something, but gets cut off when he runs into someone. They both fall down. Neil is quick to stand, but the girl is still on the floor rubbing her head. I offer her my hand, before realizing that it’s her.
Of all the girls in the hallway, Neil had to run into her. I know he didn’t mean it, but now I’m here, offering my hand to this girl who I’m infatuated with who has probably never realized that I exist.
She takes my hand, and I help pull her up. There’s a patch of light coming through a window in the ceiling, shining on her like a halo. It isn’t horribly bright; I don’t squint. “Thanks,” she says, quietly, and her voice sounds like sugar. She brushes some of her oceanic hair out of her face before meeting my eyes, and that’s when her eyes go bold and bright and full of wonder. She lets out a little gasp, covering her mouth. Quickly, though, her wonderment goes to concern. “You- you do see it too, right? All the colors?”
My mind goes blank. I want to say yes, but I’m shell shocked and have no clue what to do or say or think. But then I see her face fall, like she’s disappointed. Let down. And it’s because of me. When that happens, suddenly I vomit the words I’d wanted to say since the first day of school.
“Yes! I- I do see it! I’ve seen it since I first saw you on the first day of school… But I didn’t know if you saw me or not, or if it was someone else… so I never said anything.” I look her in the eyes, trying to tell what she’s thinking. Before I know it, she pulls a forest green sharpie out of the front pocket on her overall shorts, grabs hold of my wrist, and writes her phone number across the inside of my forearm, along with a name I assume is hers: Charlie.
“You’re gonna text me, or call me, so we can plan a date. Sound good?” Charlie says it with a smile on her face. It’s a small smile, her lips barely parting, but it’s extremely present in her eyes. I nod, smiling right back at her. “Good.” In a second, she stands on her toes and presses a kiss to my cheek, before running off to her next class with a wave good-bye.
The smile is still on my face. I guess I’ll text her soon, and we’ll go from there.