Categories > Original > Drama

The gift of Loki

by rurouni_kaze 0 reviews

Loki falls through the void until finally collides with the planet earth. Lying in the land of Midgard, he is forced to analyze and face some truths of himself. In this mental storm, he finds Tony,...

Category: Drama - Rating: G - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Warnings: [V] [?] - Published: 2019-05-17 - 4278 words

Warning: This is M/M Fanfiction (love between two men) so if you don't like please don't read.

Some clarifications before reading this story:

1) The Midgard described, is not the same as we all know. This is an inhospitable and desert land, very different in advances and culture. The why, it will be explained in the story

2) Take into account that everything happens similar to the arc of the first movie, except that Loki never goes to earth to tell Thor about the "death" of his father, nor does he send ‘The Destroyer’ after him. Thor finds an alternative way to make himself worthy and only meets again with Loki in the final battle of Bifrost.

3) Loki never finds the Chitauri (because he crashes into the earth instead), and therefore the events of The Avengers film in which Thor must return to Earth to protect it, do not happen.


(1) Gungnir: Spear that Odin used.

(2) Ergi: Nordic word meaning literally effeminate or unfit male.

(3) All-Tongue: It's a language in which, what is said, is understood by each species in its own native language.

(4) Silvertongue: Nickname received by Loki thanks to his mastery of rhetoric and the ability he demonstrates to always know what to say in a given situation.


Darkness, it was everything Loki could see. It was so thick that it consumes everything and so deep that he did not know where the darkness ended and he started.

When Loki let go of Gungnir(1), he had been prepared to die, but what he did not predict, was that his magic kept him alive, condemning him to wander through the space between the worlds, falling into an interminable motion.

He was a monster, and his sentence was established by that void; he was going to be consumed little by little until all that was left of him was nothing more than a glimpse of life, the shell of what was once a man.

He falls for so much time that even this one lost its meaning. It was in that void that he thought he had lost what little sanity he had left. Until he forgot that there was once light, touch or happiness.

He who no longer had a name or soul wondered how he had arrived at this point? How was it that everything had gone so wrong?

Having already lost all hope, suddenly something changed.

The speed of his fall, which had been a constant throughout all this time, began to accelerate and an unbearable heat hit his senses, when before he had only felt a gelid cold.

Then came the blow, one so strong and strident that he thought he had died at last.

An intense and painful light penetrated his eyes. They were not used to anything other than darkness.

It was there that he realized he was still alive, he could still feel pain, and death, he had supposed, would have ended his torment.

"Where am I?" He thought.

When he regained his vision, he could see a large crater surrounding him, and outside it a glimpse of a sandy wasteland.

He lay there for a long time, still stunned by the blow.

When he felt the thin mist that covered his thoughts disperse, he felt more able to assess his situation.

It caught his attention to discover that he could not feel anything below his neck. It was as if the muscles and skin that once formed part of his body, no longer existed. Still, he tried to move them, only to reaffirm their complete uselessness.

He knew what that meant, he must have broken his spine. Not feeling parts of your body has never been a good sign.

He realized that he was not terrified of being paralyzed, as he should have. Maybe the fall had affected his nerves too?

Continuing with his analysis, he remembered that he was carrying a bag of provisions tied to his body but quickly realized that not being able to reach them was the same as having nothing.

"Well, sustenance is not a possibility then," Loki thought.

Without having anything better to do, he concentrated again on his surroundings.

According to his position, he had a direct view towards the sky, which he noticed, was of a bluish atmosphere.

"I guess I'm lucky, I could have landed somewhere worse, someplace without oxygen for example… "

He tried to guess the name of the realm he was in.

"Vanaheim, perhaps? No, the gravity force is not the same. Svartalfheim? No, the type of soil is different"

In the distance, almost out of his angle of vision, he could glimpse some vegetation. It was far from abundant and it was almost dry, but he recognized it as Midgardian.

"Such irony! Landing on the same planet to which my brother was banished... "

His train of thought inevitably veered to that place that had once called his home and the people who in another life had been his family.

"Nobody will ever find me here. Surely, they think I'm dead…"

It was not as if that reflection distressed him. The truth was that Loki had no desire to see them, he felt that at last, he had finished with them. Even if he could come back, he would not be welcome, that was never his home, to begin with.

When Loki let go Gungnir, he had made the decision to die because he thought there was nothing left for him in Asgard. All his life he had tried to fit in, to be what his father and his people expected, but his nature invariably got in the way. He always knew there was something wrong with him, only that he was not sure what it was.

He could never reach his expectations, and, many despised him for it. He tried to change, to be like most, but later than sooner, he realized that no matter how hard he tried, he would always be different in their eyes.

That revelation awoke an intense aversion against his people. He proposed to himself to make pay everyone who had despised him. He was going to show everyone that he was not someone that could be taken lightly, he was not going to be mocked by anyone.

His personality then changed. He began to withdraw into himself and in his studies of magic. On the outside, he acquired the facade of someone aloof and controlled, but on the inside, he was someone suspicious and distrustful. He turned rhetoric into a weapon against anyone who confronted him and planned discreet revenge against those brave enough to become his enemy.

Soon, rumors began to spread. They called him many things, including the god of deceit, god of bad luck, and even Ergi(2)

The problem in this kind of situation is that if a person is told something for a sufficient amount of time, there comes a point where inevitably a part of him begins to believe what is being affirmed. And Loki despite all his apathy, was not indifferent to this rule. He became his reputation.

And then, he started to play a role, he was always good at that. However, where did the performance end and the real Loki begin? He did not know it anymore. After a while, the role was already part of his personality.

At this point, even the close relationship with his not-brother was affected.

Thor was someone bright and loved by everyone, everything that Loki would never be and that made him win his most complete grudge. He did not want to be just a shadow, the dark part that was projected from all that light.

Thor, in spite of all his virtues, was, in fact, a blind person. He never saw the true origin of his brother's hatred and when faced with his negative change of personality, he simply walked away.

All this resentment finally settled on the day of the coronation and all the events that would later be unleashed.

Loki recognized himself, that when he discovered his true origin, he had completely lost it. He felt such a deep hatred against the world and against himself that he had even gone so far as to want to exterminate an entire race, only to prove that he was not one of them.

“Well, there was no point in thinking about that. Those were reminiscences of someone else, a person who had been lost forever in the void”

He stayed there for a long time, in that forgotten wasteland. He hoped that by then his magic would have healed him, but it was not the case. He felt it flutter inside him, but he could not call it, it was as if it simply refused to make his appearance.

"Maybe my magic, like me, does not see any purpose in healing me," he reflected. "It's possible that it thinks that by not doing so, it's doing the universe a favor.

I should have died in that void. Actually, I should have perished in Jotunheim, in that temple where I was left by Laufey to rot. Everything must have ended there. It would have been a suitable destine for a monster like me"


Loki lost track of time, stopped counting the times when the sun hid in the sky and re-emerged. His time was spent between conscious spaces and moments vanished in dreams, so much so that it was difficult to differentiate when he was sleeping and when he was awake.

"How long will it take me to die without water or food?" He thought rambling. But far from being afraid, his speculations were no more than a morbid curiosity.

"Well, it does not matter, the only certainty I have is that I'm going to die, that's the only fate that awaits me."

The inevitability of the end made him think of his own life and the paths that led him to his current situation.

At first, when analyzing his circumstances, he had blamed his family for his fall into the abyss, he believed that due to his deceptions and injustices, his actions had triggered him to lose all hope and decide to let go.

"They tossed me into the abyss" He had thought.

But after repeating it so much in his head, that argument began to lose consistency, until something in his heart told him that that was not the whole truth.

"Well, if I'm going to die, it would be good if for once, I could show myself honest… even if it was only with myself"

The truth, it was time to stop justifying himself. He was not a child anymore for continue to burden his failure to others.

It is true that in the beginning the contempt and hatred of others led him astray, but at the end of the day, it was his own decisions that marked his destiny. He was responsible for his actions, nobody else.

"How strange to be rambling like this… In Asgard, I never gave myself the time to analyze my feelings in this way. How ironic that I had to stay paralyzed to find the necessary calm, which would allow me to give some sense to this tangle of thoughts" Loki said with a touch of humor.


The days piled up one after the other when he noted it. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught the silhouette of a man, a Midgardian who watched him, hidden from one of the grooves of the crater.

"Has he come to kill me?" Loki thought. "Well, it wouldn't be too bad, on the contrary, it would accelerate a process which otherwise, will be agonizingly slow."

But the man just stared at him from afar, analyzing him.

After what seemed to be a long time, he finally seemed to gather his courage and left his hiding place, stopping without further ado in front of Loki's limp body.

Once in his direct line of sight, Loki could have a better look at his appearance. The Midgardian wore a primitive outfit composed of skins and leathers. His torso was naked, but a splendid cloak covered his shoulders, probably from an animal he had hunted himself. His boots were tied with bows that reached up to his knees, and in his belt, he wore a dagger that looked of iron, which he grasped from the handle, without wielding it, as if he were undecided as to whether he should use it or not.

The man and Loki looked at each other curiously and then, to the surprise of the second, the Midgardian extended his hand.

"Hello, my name is Tony from the Stark clan. I don't know who you, are and, I really don't think you're from around here because of your clothes. Why have you been there so long without moving? Are you a god? A demon? Several days, ago I, saw that something fell from the sky, and I heard a big blow. Was that you? Can you even understand a word of what I'm saying?"

Thanks to the All-Tongue(3), Loki could understand him perfectly, however, he stared at the man in a daze. After having spent days in the most complete silence, his senses did not appreciate the apparent talent that this man possessed (Stark, his brain provided), to expel such amount of words in what seems only a second.

When he had gathered his wits again, Loki chose one of the questions and answered.

“I am not a God, maybe I was one at another time, but that person no longer exists. If you come to kill me, I will not stop you, on the contrary, you would do me a big favor," Loki said in a neutral tone.

"Kill you? Why would I do that?" Tony said with strangeness "You haven't done anything to me. Unless… Tell me, are you a threat?" He said suspiciously.

A bitter, resigned laugh made its way down his throat. "Even if I wanted to, I could not. I'm completely paralyzed, I can't move and I doubt I'll ever do it again"

Tony was silent for a moment.

"And if you could?" He finally said.

"If I could what?" Loki snapped confused.

"If you could hurt me, would you do it?"

Loki looked at him bewildered. If he had complete control of his body and strength, would he attack him? Would he kill the one who had witnessed his weakness? Would he end the life of this person without much consideration, as if it were just an annoying insect? “Maybe the person I was before wouldn't have thought twice, but now…“

"No… I wouldn't," he replied, after a long pause.

Tony then looked at him, scrutinizing his face with piercing eyes. Seeking that truth that he believed words could elude.

"All right, I believe you," He said after he finished his exam.

Loki flinched like someone had given him a slap in the face. Nobody before had released those words so lightly. He had earned the title of the God of lies and had become accustomed that everything that came out of his mouth was put in doubt. For a person to give him his trust that easily, was not something he was used to experiencing.

Tony for his part, remained indifferent to the great surprise of his interlocutor. To have been able to leave without words at the famous silvertongue(4), was a feat of which he remained completely ignorant.

"Well, ‘ex-god’ Tony said "Are you're going to tell me your name? If you don't want to, it doesn't matter, I have a talent for nicknames and just by looking at you I already have several prepared…"

"It's Loki," He said interrupting. He was sure that any of these "nicknames" would be at the lowest, exasperating and/or humiliating.

"A pleasure to meet you. So… tell me how could you have fallen from the sky?"

Loki was tempted to simply tell him that it was none of his business. He had always been a reserved person and this man hoped that just by asking, he would be willing to tell him each of his secrets. But he was just too tired… and besides, just thinking about a rhetorical battle with this man made his head throb.

And then with a sigh, Loki told him about his origins and his fall, to then explaining how, by complete chance, he had ended up colliding with the planet earth. It was a rather undetailed and brief account of the events, spoken in a disinterested tone, almost mechanical.

However, ignoring any reluctance on Loki's part, Tony did not refrain from interrupting him with questions of all kinds, which Loki responded by Olympically ignoring all inquisition about the reasons that had triggered his fall in the first place.

Tony showed special curiosity about his extraterrestrial culture, and then Loki agreed to tell him about Asgard, his people, and advances. He talked about their customs and discoveries. He tried to describe those unique landscapes and in doing so, it was as if he were there again. His story then acquired a somewhat melancholic tone, and the shadow of a great sadness threatened to envelop him, but then, as he caught a glimpse of the amazed face of his spectator, with astonishment, he realized that those feelings began to recede.

"Wow!" Tony said "All this is amazing! Another planet! What you call technology! Magic! I can’t even imagine it. Would it be possible for humans to ever achieve such advances? I Hope so.

You see, I'm an inventor. Through my creations, I have tried to improve the life status of my tribe, but the truth is that there is not much I can do when we are dying of hunger and thirst.

For a long time, my people and I have been fighting for our survival, but I am sorry to say that things are not favorable for us. Diseases, lack of food and water, keep my tribe on the verge of disappearance.

But, I guess I should not complain, everywhere is the same, there are people with even worse luck than ours…"

That last sentence surprised Loki.

"Why do you say that everywhere is the same? Is the earth going through a period of crisis?"

"Period of crisis… It is a way of putting it" Tony said sitting next to him as if suddenly a great weight had settled on his shoulders "I don't know if you have noticed, but we are not standing on a very fruitful ground. Where you look is dry and sterile, but the issue is that it is not just here. However far I've come, or explorers I've asked, it's the same everywhere, there's only scarcity.

With my tribe, we have come to the conclusion that we are witnessing the death of the earth. The elderly, says that with each generation is worse, they assure that a time will come when everything will dry completely, which will mean the extinction of life, animals and humans alike.

Distressed for the inevitability of that prediction, I have dedicated my life to trying to find a solution to this problem, but I have not yet found anything.

Looking for information, on one of my trips, I found some old writings. They speak of the land of before, one teeming with water and food, a world where people had their needs met and a large culture.

In their records, you can see precisely when things started to change. There was a phenomenon that they called ‘the warming of the globe’, a generalized drought that began to spread to all corners.

Once it had begun, it could not be stopped and soon humanity witnessed a process that although slow, left only death around it.

Soon, what remains of humanity began to panic. Wars were unleashed by the supremacy of the few resources they had, only causing more people to perish.

The records end there, abandoned.

My theory is that after the wars, little was left. Humanity survived but barely, and those who remained had to start over, create a new society with the remains. That's why, if we ever had technology like the one you describe, it doesn't exist anymore"

Upon hearing this, Loki felt a twinge of visceral pain in his chest. It took several disconcerting moments to identify it as empathy.

"I… I didn't know" It was all he could say

"It's ok, it's not your fault"

But it wasn't? Loki had been a prince of Asgard, that meant he had sworn to protect all it vassal kingdoms. This, of course, included the earth.

How it was possible that he hadn't find out about their situation before? It was not as if he had cared much at that time, but he hadn't heard anyone from Asgard even mention the matter.

Did Odin know? It seemed unlikely that he would remain ignorant. But why hadn't he done something then? “Maybe he just didn't care” whispered a small voice inside his head.

The one that should have known, was Thor. When he was banished, he had to have had witnessed the human dilemma. But it is not as if he had discussed with Thor his experience on earth. After his exile, they only saw themselves again in the Bifrost, and not precisely just for conversation, but to face each other in that final battle, whose result led him to let go of Gungnir and fall into the void.

But it was not worth thinking about that. Nothing good could come from reliving the past, or from asking questions that would probably never be answered. He decided then to focus on more present matters.

He still felt that lingering sense of empathy nagging him. It wasn't common for him to succumb to that emotion, it was never an impulse that came naturally in him and yet there it was, stinging him straight in the chest.

He had to do something about it, it was becoming really unbearable… And at that moment he remembered it.

"Stark, you said your tribe is starving, right? Do you see a bag that is tied to my hip? There you will find some food. I remember that there are vegetables and some bread. That bread is a special one, it is designed to make an Asgardian recover his strength and be able to keep up for several days, I suspect that for a human it would be even longer. It is not much, given that it is intended for a single individual, but I think it could help"

Stark's face lit up suddenly full of joy, but then he looked at Loki and his expression changed to one of apprehension.

"And what about you? You said you couldn't move, so that means you haven't eaten anything, right? Just wait, I will reach for something… "

"No," Loki said, with a hard voice that stopped him in his tracks "It would be a waste. You could feed me now but what good would it do? it would only prolong the inevitable. If I can't move, how am I going to fend for myself? How can I obtain sustenance in a realm that is already austere? No… it is better that you bring all the food to your people"

"Oh no! I'm not going to have any of that! Right now I'm going to give you a portion of that bread and I'm going to feed you with it myself. And if you don't want to, I'm going to… poke you in the face with a stick until you get tired and end up yielding. If this becomes a battle of attrition, I have everything to gain, I have all the time in the world. I can keep up until you end up surrendering just for how annoying I can be"

Loki didn't plan it, it just slipped out of his mouth, a loud laugh that made him feel dizzy. This was not an ironic smirk like the one he usually dedicated to the people of the court in Asgard. This was a sincere laugh, in its purest state. A rich sound, which at that time it was impossible for him to contain.

When was the last time he had laughed like that? He honestly couldn't remember.

When he had recovered from his outburst, he tried to compose his face in one of seriousness but still could be noticed a dim treacherous light of fun that danced in his eyes.

"I have the feeling that you are someone who is not used to receiving negatives, yes?"

"I do receive negative, it's just that I decide not to pay them attention," Tony said with a smug smile on his face.

"Very well Stark," Loki said after a moment "I'll let you feed me this time if you wish, but I have not changed my mind, I still maintain the futility of this agreement"

Stark then proceeded with care, to remove the food from the bag and to deposit portions of food on the cracked lips of Loki.

When he had finished, he left to his tribe, but not before giving Loki the vehement promise of his return.

After that unexpected encounter, Loki felt lightheaded, with a strange sensation in his face, a slight tingling, especially in the places where Tony had touched him. Could it be… contentment? He considered it and then shook his head. "Sentimental nonsense." he thought.


Author's notes:

What do you think? Should I continue? Please comment or leave likes. They make my day and encourage me to continue writing :)

PS: I'm not a native speaker and this isn't beta, so consider yourself warned of any mistakes
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