FicWad

"Cassiodor," Aurelius whined. "Surely you have advice for me? I cannot fathom on how I am supposed to tell her..."

Cassiodor, from his spot on the floor, rolled his eyes. "Just tell her, Aurelius. It is truly not so complicated. All you must do, brother, is speak your heart to her."

Cassiodor paused.

"Or, perhaps, you ought to sing to her?"

"I tried, Cassiodor. She said she'd rather turn into a pine tree. What good is a pine tree? How am I to love a pine tree, of all things?"

"Aurelius, brother... I believe that is the point she is trying to articulate. Perhaps she does not want to receive your affections."

"What could I have possibly done to her to make her despise me so, Cassiodor?"

"Alas, Aurelius, my brother. I cannot answer your question. Women are strange beings. But, if you would like guidance to the inner workings of a woman's heart... perhaps you should ask our sister?"

"Euergetia? Last time I attempted to speak to her regarding the matters of the heart, she threatened to scare my ducks off into the wild."

"Ah, how... unfortunate. I shall speak to her in your stead, then."

The two were silent for a while until Aurelius finally spoke once more.

"Perhaps I shall sing to her, then."