Categories > Original > Humor

You Take A Hit

by KurtPikachu2001 0 reviews

Robot Chicken sketch. What happens when The Gummi Bears eat "candy" from Cavin and Princess Calla?

Category: Humor - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Warnings: [V] - Published: 19 hours ago - 1284 words - Complete

0Unrated
Wanted to write a Robot Chicken fanfic spoofing an old favorite of mine. Note the characters in this are adults.


Robot Chicken and Gummi Bears


fanfic title:


You Take A Hit


by: Trenton Sands



Scene 1:


Skipping around and bouncing. Sunni, Cubbi, Tummi, Gusto, and Zummi were all walking around the forest of Dunwyn after a great adventure.


Cubbi: Did you see me back there! I was all like, I'm going to kick your ass! Duke Igthorn was all like, WOAHHH!!!!


Tummi: While you guys were battling, I was in the bathroom.


Zummi: I was wondering where you were.


Tummi: Discovered this new thing called binge and purge. You should try it


Sunni: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! You were engaging in a self destructive eating disorder. We sure could've used your help, shit ass!


Tummi: I was going to and....


Gusto: Ahhh, forget it! We didn't need you anyway.


As Sunni, Tummi, Gusto, Cubbi, and Zummi were all headed back to the castle, they are stopped by Cavin and Calla.


Cavin (waves to the Gummi Bears): Hey guys! Over here!


Princess Calla: We want to show you something!


Cubbi (runs to Cavin and Calla): What is it you guys?


Cavin: When you guys were away we had this awesome party!


Princess Calla: Yeah, and you missed it!


Sunni: If you must know we were battling evil.


Tummi: Want to see a cool trick I learned called binge and....


Gusto: Don't start with that shit, Tummi!


Tummi: OKay!


Cavin reaches into his pocket.


Princess Calla: My Dad King Gregor had a meeting to go to. We partied so hard we got away with it!


Cavin: Also during the party we hocked something from his liquor cabinet!


Cubbi, Gusto, Zummi, Tummi, and Sunni all watch as Cavin takes some pills out of his pocket.


Cavin: Tah dah!


Sunni: What is it?


Cavin: It's this cool candy that makes you see colors and more radical stuff.


Princess Calla: I think it's called Molly. Did we mention it feels like you're spinning around and you see things that aren't there?


Cavin: Wait'll you taste it, the flavor just knocks you out!


Cubbi: Well we do deserve some candy after that epic battle we had.


Sunni: I'll take six.


Cavin and Princess Calla give each of the Gummi Bears a fair share of Molly. Tummi was the first to try it.


Tummi: I'm not feeling anything......WOAH!!!!


Cubbi: Isn't that like Tummi always wanted to be first! Asshole! Why do we invite him on our...


Zummi: Take the Molly, Cubbi.


Sunni: I just did!


Gusto: I'm going in!


After taking the Molly, Zummi, Gusto, Sunni, Cubbi all started to feel the effects of Molly.



Scene 2:


Wandering off, Cubbi, Gusto, Zummi, Sunni, and Tummi all found themselves at a cemetary. Not only were they feeling the effects of Molly, they were also drinking too.


Cubbi: I'm havin' a bad trip man!


Gusto: Is this what is supposed to happen?


Sunni (twirling around): Pretty colors! Everything is so maginifent!


Tummi: Let's go to the Hollywood Hills and kill a bunch of people.


Zummi: WHAT?!?! What the fuck are Hollywood Hills?


Gusto: Even when he's high hick he's a loser!


Cubbi gets some more Molly.


Gusto: What's that?


Cubbi: It's more of this Molly stuff! What do you think!


Zummi: Shut up and take it!


Cubbi gives more Molly to Zummi, Gusto, Tummi and Sunni and more for himself. Getting even more high, Sunni begins to make out with Zummi and Gusto. Getting away from his friends, Tummi walks even deeper into the cemetary and begins to hug a female angel statue and begins to have sex with it.


Tummi: Ooooooh! I love you so much!



Cubbi, Zummi, Gusto, and Sunni soon began to spew Bible verses.



Gusto: We're going up to earth for the last time....



Zummi: He was crucified and died and he was buried.



Tummi (still humping the statue): OOOoooohhh! I love you so much!



Sunni: He decended into hell and on the third day he rose again from the dead...



Cubbi, Zummi, Gusto, and Sunni say the Bible Verses on a loop. Things began to spin around. Gusto begins to rip off his clothes. Gusto begins to see horrifying images of skeletons having sex with each other.


Gusto: AHHH! AAAHHH! AAAAAHHH!!! I SEE BONES FUCKING! I SEE BONES FUCKING EACH OTHER!


Cubbi (walks over to Gusto): I want you to be beautiful! (10x)


Sunni begins to speak a mix of Italian and Russian. Cubbi was able to assure Gusto. As she was still making out and having sex with Zummi and Gusto.




Scene 3:


At Drekmore castle. Duke Igthorn was watching the Cubbi, Sunni, Gusto, Zummi, and Tummi all tripping out on Molly.


Toadwart: What the FUCK are they doing?



Duke Igthorn: Just what you said. (takes a better look): They're all high and having a sex orgy!



Toadwart: It appears they're high on drugs.



Duke Igthorn: Hmmm, this gives me an idea to defeat those pieces of shit once and for all!



Toadwart: Okay what shall it be?



Duke Igthorn: You know I've been using real estate development as a hobby, and now I want to put it into good use.


Toadwart: How are you going to pull it off?


Duke Igthorn: I had the orges build a model home. All we need to do is lure the Gummi Bears and into it, and BAM! They all explode into organs and skin!


Toadwart: Let's do it!


Duke Igthor: What I need you to do is pretend you're going to take them to a nightclub.


Toadwart: Loving this already!



Scene 4:



Scrambling out of the graveyard. After Cubbi pryed off Tummi humping the angel statue. Sunni, Tummi, Zummi, Gusto, and Cubbi were still high on the Molly.



Gusto: Wow! Sunni! You have great sex! I even got a little naked myself!


Zummi: I want more! I want more! Gimmie please! I want some more!


Toadwart comes to them on a stagecoach.


Sunni: Hey, look! A ride. Should we go?


Cubbi: Oh hell yeah!


Tummi: More fun!


Toadwart: I'm the dude that takes home drunks or in your case, druggies.......well I lost my train of thought. At your service! Climb aboard!


Cubbi: Where you are going to take us!


Toadwart: To a fun nightclub that will blow your mind! It's like the Studip 54 of the middle ages!


Riding the stagecoach, Toadwart lures them into Duke Igthor's model home.




Scene 5:


Duke Igthor calls Toadwart.


Toadwart: Everything is set!


Duke Igthor: Perfect! Now on with the plan!


Cubbi, Zummi, Sunni, Gusto, and Tummi all look around the model house.


Sunni: This is a letdown!


Zummi: I thought this was going to be a nightclub!


Cubbi: It's just a boring house!


Tummi (goes into a fridge); There's no food around here! FUCK!


Gusto and Tummi sees a bunch of familiar products by car care companies. STP, Armor All, Quaker State, Esso, Castrol, and Pennzoil.


Tummi: What does STP stand for?


Cubbi: What are you looking at there Gusto!


Gusto: I think this could be more Molly and....


Outside the model house, Duke Igthor and Toadwart go about their plan. Duke Igthor lights a match on the car care products and the model home explodes in slow motion all the while playing a psychedelic tune. Cubbi, Zummi, Tummi, Sunni, and Gusto were no more. Their skeletons flew out of the explosion with their clothes still intact.


Duke Igthor: Yes! Yes! Yes! They're dead! They're dead!


Toadwart: Funny how much damage car oil products can do.


From a distance Flint Shrubwood sees the explosion and turns to face the audience.


Flint Shrubwood: Remember kids. Motor Oil, Fire and Molly are a dangerous and deadly combination!



THE END
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