Categories > Celebrities > Savage Garden > The Jonesy

The Jonesy

by Stazzy 4 reviews

Darren has an own animal show and today he introduces his favorite animal^_^

Category: Savage Garden - Rating: PG - Genres: Parody - Characters: Daniel Jones, Darren Hayes - Published: 2005-07-03 - Updated: 2005-07-03 - 719 words - Complete

The Jonesy

Daz: Hello and welcome to "The Animal Song", my own little animal show!
audience cheers
Daz: Today I'm going to introduce my very favorite animal in the whole world to
you! It is very rare, in fact there only exists one single exemplar in the world: It is the 'Jonesy'!
Daniel comes onstage from left, smiling nervously and sitting down at Darren's feet
Daz: Isn't it cute? Its name is Daniel and it's a little Boy-Jonesy, though there aren't any Girl-Jonesies...
Daniel rolls his eyes
audience 'Aaaawwwwws'
Daz: Petting Daniel's hair The Jonesy is a very intelligent animal, in fact; it is the most intelligent animal I've ever dealt with. It can reach a height of 5'11". It has a quiet nature and doesn't make too much noise, though if you give it a guitar, a piano or drums, that's a whole different story...
Daniel beams and pretends to play air guitar
Daz: You see what I mean? The Jonesy mostly feeds of Asian food, chocolate and cola, but it has this bad habit of smoking and sipping beer even though it knows quite well that those things are bad for its health... glares at Daniel
Daniel smiles up at him sweetly with fake innocence
audience 'Aaaawwwwws' again
Daz: And it is extremely vicious. It knows just too well when to put on the 'I'm-such-a-cute-little-Jonesy-you-can't-be-mad-at-me-look'... sighs in defeat and strokes Daniels left ear
Daniel closes his eyes and starts purring
Daz: As you can hear it has a low, deep voice. It is quite musicale and very talented with all sorts of instruments, but though it has such a nice voice its singing qualities aren't that good...
Daniel grins
audience laughs
Daz: Puts a hand on Daniel's chin to open his mouth The Jonesy has very big, long white teeth. They are just perfect for chocolate hunting and his most effective self defensives: Laughing and grinning.
Daniel beams
audience 'Aaaawwwwws' yet again
Daz: Yeah, okay Danny: AND beaming. There, happy?
Daniel purrs
Daz: It usually makes noises such as purring... tickles Daniel
Daniel giggles
Daz: Giggling... strokes Daniel's stomach
Daniel moans
Daz: Moaning, and one of my favorites... pokes at Daniel's stomach
Daniel squeaks
Daz: smirks ... squeaking.
Daniel growls
Daz: Okay, when it has its 'moments' it likes to growl...
Daniel pouts
Daz: smiles at Daniel and caresses his chin ... and to pout. But it rarely speaks. I think it never speaks, but there still are some people who claim to have it heard speaking... I don't think it's true.
Daniel nuzzles Darren's leg
Daz: It is a very caring creature and likes to receive affection. strokes Daniels neck It can be very loving and also very possessive when someone else gets near their master...
Daniel growls at the man bringing Darren a glass of water
Camera zooms to Daniel
Daniel squeaks and tries to hide behind Darren's legs
Daz: chuckles It is afraid of cameras and doesn't like public attention very much. The Jonesy is a shy animal who only trusts its master...
Daniel smiles and sits on the couch right beside Darren
Daz: It has sandy blond, shaggy fur and doesn't give too much about its look. But it is very proud of its dark skin, or what humans might like calling 'tan'.
holds up Daniel's bare arm
Daniel leans into him and purrs again
Daz: The Jonesy is a very active being and likes to play a lot. wriggles eye brows at Daniel It likes sports of any kind grins and is very energetic when it comes to things it enjoys. grins even wider
audience chuckles
Daz: The Jonesy is also a VERY aggressive and possessive creature when it comes to... mating. It can be quite insatiable at times, for his mating time never seems to end and it is constantly in heat...
Daniel rubs his cheek on Darren's pants and makes mewling noise
Daz: Oh, I think my dear Daniel wants to be alone with me... checks his watch It is time to say goodbye anyway, it's getting late. Next time I'll show you the Benny, a very cute little animal...
Daniel growls again
Daz: But of course it's not half as cute as you are, Dan.
Daniel mewls and licks Darren's lips
Daz: blushes Okay, time to go now, see you all!

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