Categories > Celebrities > Good Charlotte > Mutilated Monkey Meat *One Shot*

Mutilated Monkey Meat *One Shot*

by Leigh_Ashworth 2 reviews

Paul brings home some mutilated monkey meat. Chris is in this too.

Category: Good Charlotte - Rating: G - Genres: Humor - Published: 2006-10-06 - Updated: 2006-10-06 - 594 words - Complete

Paul: Hey guys! I'm back from the market.

Benji: Damn, what's that smell?!

Paul: Well, while I was shopping for y'all's veggie shit; I came across some mutilated monkey meat and the man behind the counter said to boil it for 20 minutes the grill it for 25 minutes, then serve it and eat it.

Joel, Billy, and Benji: Mutilated what?!

Paul: Mutilated...Monkey...Meat.

Joel: Why in the fucking hell would you eat monkey meat?

Paul: Well, the guy behind the counter said that if I boil it and grill it just right, it will taste like chicken.

Billy: You are very weird, but one of a kind my friend.

Paul: Thanks Billy, at least someone here appreciates me.

Joel, Benji: Paul, we appreciate you. It's just that we never thought you would eat mutilated monkey meat.

3 minutes later

Chris: Hey, what's cookin' good lookin'?"

Joel: Paul's mutilated monkey meat and don't call me that I'm not gay.

Chris: Yes you are (as he tickled Joel)

Joel: Chris would... you... stop... Hey, don't go down there.

Benji: What the hell are you doing to my twin Chris?

Chris: Damn, I'm just playing with him.

Benji: Well, don't okay. I don't want a gay brother.

Chris: Yeah, okay...Hey I'm not gay!

Billy: You act like it sometimes.

Chris: Well, my girlfriend made me that way. She's always getting me to do sissy things.

Benji: It's not our fault you're dating her.

Chris: Leave my girlfriend out of this will ya?

Benji: No...

Joel: I guess not.

Paul: Benji, Billy, Joel, Chris, dinner's ready. Come and get it.

Joel: Paul, we are not eating mutilated monkey meat.

Paul: I know that. I fixed up some veggie medley mix for you three.

Chris: Yippee... dinner.

Billy: Chris, you are a fucking idiot.

Chris: I know you are but what am I?

Joel: Dork.

Chris: Did you just call me a whale's penis?

Benji: I think he just did.

Chris: Shut up dumbass!

Benji: Don't call me that DORK!

Paul: Okay, let's eat everyone.

Billy: Something smells good

Paul: Yeah, I think the mutilated monkey meat turned out great.

Billy: I spoke too soon...

Paul: Hey!

Joel and Benji start laughing

Chris snorts then laughs then snorts again.
Chris: Let me have a taste

Billy, Joel, Benji: No Chris, don't eat it.

Chris is puking his guts out on the kitchen floor.

Paul: Well, no more for you Chris.

Chris: Hallelujah

Benji: You know, I think Chris hates mutilated monkey meat.

Joel: Benji, I think you're right.

Benji: I know I'm right Joel.

Paul: Smart ass.

Billy: Now Paul, you know that Benji's been a smart ass since birth.

Benji punches Billy but smiled

Billy: Ow... Bitch!

Benji: I'm not a female dog, Billy.

Billy sticks his tongue out at Benji.

Benji grabs Billy's tongue.

Benji: Say it.

Billy: Surrey Bendy

Benji let's go of Billy's tongue

Billy: God Benji, your finger tastes sour.

Benji: What!

Joel: Damn, now that's funny.

Paul chuckles

Chris laughs

Paul: Hey after we eat, y'all wanna watch some movies?

Chris, Benji, Joel, Billy: No!!!

Paul: Why not?!

Benji: Because we have a show tomorrow

Paul: Oh yeah.

10 minutes later

Billy: Okay, I'm done. I'm going to bed.

Benji, Paul, Joel, Chris: Goodnight.

Billy yawns.

Billy: Night

15 minutes later

Paul: I'm going to bed

Benji, Joel, Chris: Goodnight

Paul yawns.

12 minutes later

Chris: I'm going to bed.

Benji, Joel: Goodnight

Chris yawns twice

Chris: Night

30 minutes later Benji nudges Joel and they head to bed

Benji: Night Joel

Joel: Night Benji

The End
Sign up to rate and review this story